It's no big deal. I will print lots of money to make Nigerians rich. Zimbabwe has done that with great success.

In economics, printing of money is not the solution to solving a country's financial problems. Even though to a lay man it seems the best solution. People often say why can't the Government print as much money as it wants to alleviate the financial problems.

Unfortunately, the Central Bank, World Bank and IMF monitor, supervise and approve the printing of money based on inflationary conditions and economic parameters.

I can see that you share this view of Govt printing money as a long term solution.

Most experienced businessmen (like you and me), have a lot to offer, but the problem lies in the fact that solving a country's problems requires not only experience in business but expertise in other fields which you may be lacking. (no insult intended).

As a businessman like you, I'd rather continue to run my business than dabble into Politics.

Unfortunately, I am still not very convinced that your economic policies will bring about an increase in wages of Nigerian graduates to meet International Standards.

I reserve my votes for you until you can convince me further.

My satire seems to be too subtle for you to grab. What I'm saying here is the exact opposite of what I believe.

Apparently ShutMouth is the only one who fails to understand the Joke.
He's just like OBJ, Mr No Joke no Play.

My satire seems to be too subtle for you to grab. What I'm saying here is the exact opposite of what I believe.

Seun, I know you're never going into politics in the next 100 years.

Forums is a place where people visit to have fun, educate their minds and share experience.

You can turn jokes into real life issues especially as we are in an election mood where most people really don't know what issues face their candidates.

Your political joke, reminds me of Campus Politics, so don't mind me. I am having fun here as you do.

Wishing you the best, my brother. For avoidance of doubt, I'm a Libertarian: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Libertarian

My Excellency sir,JSCE SSCE NFA,since one major problem in naija is unemployemt,i would like to be your Most senior special adviser whereby i would also have other senior special advisers ranging from grandmother to my last siblings ,then others close friends as advisers advising on how to take my bath to eating , movies and "gbadoing".As matter of fact the list of advisers might be endless depending on  my irrational thoughts.Abeg how u see am?

I hail you chief Doctor, Profeesor S. Osewa.

I think I will vote for you. You will actually make a godd presidnt in
the Kingdom of hell.

Still me

LOL,

dude i want to assure u, u've got my vote, this country needs u. , pls don't disappoint me. i can be ur campaign manager. or power and steel minister when u get elected. i promise nigerian will never see electricity for as long as they live. no more phcn bills. or what do u think?

It's an excellent idea! We also need to nationalize the communication sector in order to return to the glorious days of NITEL in which every Nigerian, rich or poor, could afford the same amount of telephone access i.e. none.

seun
i like ur idea
create jobs and turn the country to shambles
well, i'd like to be ur vice

Seun I will vote for you if you give me a reputable post in your cabinet ie a minister or something higher. believe me if you can assure me that, you’ll win the next elections co’s I won’t mind taking a gong and beating it on the road telling people it’s a do or die affair that they must vote for Seun or no one else.
And believe me you’ll win.

if you can assure me that, you’ll win the next elections co’s I won’t mind taking a gong and beating it on the road telling people it’s a do or die affair that they must vote for Seun or no one else.

Beating gongs is not the answer. You need to use sticks and rods to beat the people if they don't comply!

Seun:

Beating gongs is not the answer. You need to use sticks and rods to beat the people if they don't comply!

This is why you can't win an election in Nigeria.Politicians are giving out firearms to their thugs and you are offering sticks and gongs

Which Ministerial post will you give me?

I would like to be the Minister of Embezzlement and Matters Ancillary To Looting

@Seun laughs. In the light of recent events, what do you think of this thread?

Is the Great One still interested in his post? lol.


Guess the satire bit got corrupted.

Your ideology is similar to 'Pol Pots'

Where can I cast my vote?

.

Oga Seun will surely become a Minister in 2019

DJHANDSOME:
Mr seun, abeg what is nfa?

no future ambition. Now

Seun:
It's an excellent idea! We also need to nationalize the communication sector in order to return to the glorious days of NITEL in which every Nigerian, rich or poor, could afford the same amount of telephone access i.e. none.

Seun was formerly Musiwwa the General

.

Seun:
It is a fact universally acknowledged that politicians, not entrepreneurs, are responsible for the creation of jobs. If you vote for me as the next president of Nigeria, I promise to create jobs in my capacity as the commander in chief of the armed forces. I will use my sophisticated weapons to create millions of automatic jobs for Nigerians.

For example, I'm going to plant troops along the expressways linking the northern part of Nigeria to the south. When those troops spot lorries moving large quantities of agricultural produce to the south, they'll shoot the tyres so the lorries will lose control and veer into the bush. Many jobs will be created in the agricultural sector, because farmers in the north will have to employ more hands to replace the destroyed vegetables and fruits.

You may have witnessed customs officials destroying foodstuffs, medicines, clothes, and other items imported into the country illegally. This creates jobs in local industries and deprives those greedy importers of their illegal profits. The problem is that they don't go far enough - they allow some products to get into the country, destroying local jobs in the process. As the commander in chief, I will create millions of local jobs by making importation illegal.

Also, I'm going to purchase long range stealth bombers to sink some of the ships heading out of Nigeria. This will create more jobs in the maritime sector as shipping companies struggle to replace lost crew members. It will also create jobs in all exporting industries - oil, agriculture, and mining - because more goods will have to be exported to replace the ones destroyed. Imagine that: a single policy that creates jobs in two ways at once!

To create more jobs in the construction industry, I will employ demolition squads from the army to use grenades, dynamites, and bombs to completely destroy large office complexes all over the country. Don't worry - this will only take place on weekends and public holidays - so the only workers who might lose their lives are those who work hard when they are supposed to be relaxing at home. That is a risk that I am willing to take to create jobs.

But that's not all. I will influence the senate to create laws against deviants (atheists and homosexuals, geniuses and idiots) and moral offences like (adultery and fornication, envy and greed). All laws will come with long prison sentences starting from ten years and above. With millions of Nigerians in prison, there will be enough jobs for those who are lucky enough not to be convicted of any laws. There'll be more than enough jobs to go around!

Finally I will make it mandatory for any registered business to re-staff. I'll make it an offence for any company in Nigeria to operate without employing 250 Nigerians in each branch office. Registered businesses will have it easy - only 100 employees per branch and 2 branches minimum. Any manager who doesn't comply will be thrown in prison, making his job available to someone else! This is the secret of communism's success - job creation by fiat!

Some of my critics have suggested that with so many jobs created, paying the employees will become a problem. Isn't this ridiculous when, as the president of Nigeria I can just order the CBN to print more money? So please vote for me in the 2007 presidential elections, and I promise you that unemployment will become a thing of the past. I promise to make Nigeria the Zimbabwe of West Africa; in fact Nigeria will be much more gigantic giant.

His Excellency, The Most High Chief And Professor S Osewa (JSCE, SSCE, NFA)

Are you still running?

Seun was formerly Musiwwa the General

Really?

Bibi:
Are you standing as independent Candidate or on which party platform are you running?

I prose to include resource control in your agenda. Let the South South keep their oil wealth, The North their income from Groundnuts and colanuts, and the west their, hmmm, what? and the east, what?

Good question, APC or Rapc or pdp

So na seun be musiwa bin satellite.

phase1:
So na seun be musiwa bin satellite.

I don't think so, seun cannot be musiwa of *** memory

*******

OLD FORMAT, 9JA DON WISE