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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse (38068 Views)
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5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by darea18: 7:13am On Dec 22, 2013 |
Most marriages go through periods of highs and lows. Therefore, it is pretty common for a husband and wife to differ on certain points. At times one person becomes more dominant than the other. If the husband enjoys making his point heard, the wife would prefer to let him have his say to maintain calmness in their bond. Or, the wife may disagree with her husband on different topics and the husband might choose to act as the peacemaker. Well, here are some ways to handle your spouse’s temper effectively. 1. Recognize the triggers The first step is to recognize each other’s temperament. Make it a point to voice your feelings to one another in the best possible way without being condescending or judgmental. Once both of you are aware of what acts as a trigger for your respective anger issues, you can deal with them more effectively. It is common knowledge that ‘opposites attract’, and so make sure that both of you balance each other out and are aware of what irks the other. 2. Take a step back Secondly, it would be wise if you took a step back to allow your partner to cool down. Therefore, if you find your spouse getting angry over something, do not make things worse by tackling them or reprimanding them for their actions there and then. Instead, step aside and allow them to calm down. In time, they themselves will come back and apologize for their outburst. The key here is to give them their space so that they can realize their folly on their own. 3. Keep your own attitude under check Realize that at times it might be your behavior and attitude that might cause tempers to fly. If you fight fire with fire, you will land up in a stalemate with the problem still left unsolved. It is vital that you manage your emotions well in order to prevent any major outburst with your temperamental spouse. So, if you know that there are things that could cause an emotional outburst; your reaction to it could determine whether it has the possibility of turning ugly or getting resolved. 4. Dig into some patience Fourthly, in order to really deal effectively with your short-tempered spouse, you will need to dig into your reserve of patience. Sometimes you may disapprove of your spouse’s outbursts over trivial and petty issues. These may cause you to wonder what you might have done wrong. However, the key to dealing with such outbursts over minor issues is to have the patience to deal with your partner calmly. Therefore, avoid responding with equally nasty comments that could rupture into something major. 5. Encourage them towards change Lastly, you could help encourage your spouse to adopt certain tips to calm down during an outburst. Deep breathing and maybe some meditation in the morning could prove to be the right solutions to help your partner control his/her temperament. Also, make sure to inform your spouse about the ill- effects of anger, namely how it can lead to complications and affect their health in the bargain. These tips are sure to keep a check on your spouse’s temper issues, thereby ensuring that your marriage is stable and happy. 2 Likes |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by Matildachinyere(f): 7:22am On Dec 22, 2013 |
point noted |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by darea18: 7:29am On Dec 22, 2013 |
Matildachinyere: point notedvery |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by Decapo: 7:42am On Dec 22, 2013 |
Seconded |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by Nuzo1(m): 8:44am On Dec 22, 2013 |
Op So, in other words...become an unhappy dummy to your spouse just because they chose to be short tempered? The best way to handle such people is to run for your life! Trust me, most of them never change. 80% of murder cases we hear of today were not originally planned. They were as a result of people angrily and violently reacting quickly and irrationally. 4 Likes |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by darea18: 9:11am On Dec 22, 2013 |
Nuzo':like seriously? You don't have love then. Run is the worst you'd do to someone you love |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by Nuzo1(m): 11:13am On Dec 22, 2013 |
darea18: like seriously? You don't have love then. Run is the worst you'd do to someone you love And kill is what they will do to you. Love is not enough! 1 Like |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by darea18: 12:27pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
Nuzo':a question for you...... Can you die for love? |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by emmaxy54(m): 12:45pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
darea18: a question for you...... Can you die for love?runnin away is not the solution my guy. |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by oyinbogirl(f): 12:59pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
Nice post..... you know something ? Some ppl cant handle too much anger.... there are different degrees of anger. Everyone is capable of feeling and showing anger, and that is a normal thing, I guess when anger gets out of control & cant be contained then that ibecomes a real problem. That person can be a liabilty! A person like that I wouldn't feel safe with personally cos those are the types who can commit murder, or beat you or damage property. On the other hand the normal anger/short fuse can be dealt with nicely as you said here. Sometimes over time age will mellow such a person.I knew of a couple who the husband was very fiery in younger years and mellowed out considerably in his later years. His wife was always the cool one but she is now the one running a short fuse in her later years. 1 Like |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by Kezifils(m): 1:22pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
@OP you re right but its nt easy to to do all u suggested |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by Nuzo1(m): 1:33pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
darea18: a question for you...... Can you die for love? Lol...tricky question huh. Hell NO if dying for love is all about jumping off the bridge or allowing my partner kill me cos she's hot tempered. Such decision is the kind we read in the murder column....and end up berating and condemning such illogical decision. Is it even fair you asked me such a question? 1 Like |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by darea18: 2:34pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
oyinbogirl: Nice post..... you know something ? Some ppl cant handle too much anger.... there are different degrees of anger. Everyone is capable of feeling and showing anger, and that is a normal thing, I guess when anger gets out of control & cant be contained then that ibecomes a real problem. That person can be a liabilty! A person like that I wouldn't feel safe with personally cos those are the types who can commit murder, or beat you or damage property. On the other hand the normal anger/short fuse can be dealt with nicely as you said here. Sometimes over time age will mellow such a person.I knew of a couple who the husband was very fiery in younger years and mellowed out considerably in his later years. His wife was always the cool one but she is now the one running a short fuse in her later years.yeah got similar story. Change is constant, I know. |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by darea18: 2:36pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
Kezifils: @OP you re right but its nt easy to to do all u suggestedI know. Especially not you. Cos you sounds so straightforward |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by darea18: 2:38pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
Nuzo':you sounds beaten already. I only asked a question. |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by Nuzo1(m): 3:07pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
darea18: you sounds beaten already. I only asked a question. Would you die for love? |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by darea18: 4:32pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
Nuzo':lemme think about it |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by ireneidiva(f): 5:24pm On Dec 22, 2013 |
darea18: a question for you...... Can you die for love? hell no! Jesus did that! I'll run! 1 Like |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by darea18: 9:48am On Dec 25, 2013 |
ireneidiva:really... |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by midehi2(f): 10:55pm On Jan 29, 2016 |
Nuzo1:hmmm...point! |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by midehi2(f): 10:56pm On Jan 29, 2016 |
darea18:yea...sometimes its really hard to run away from someone we deeply love |
Re: 5 Ways To Handle Your Short- Tempered Spouse by adamaxng: 10:19am On Oct 31, 2016 |
Please I need a practicable help in dealing with anger. I noticed that i am hot temper and this has been affecting my relationship with people. I have prayed over it, try to overcome it but still finding it a bit hard. it will flared and within few minutes, I will realized my self and felt bad that I was tempered again. I am tried of telling people that I am sorry or people walking away from me in a relationship because of my easily temper. Please I need a practiceable help. |
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