Baby mama:



I came in late in this party and to the Op I would say these
How dare you insult the intelligence of people by starting a thread ,actually threads on your issues and people comment sincerely to help you then you go offline to tell details to a poster?
If he is the only person who understands you and your situation then spare us and unburden on his manly shoulders ,let him help you wipe your tears and energize you to fight for your man.( whatever that stupid term means)

Exactly my thoughts. She came to give us the half truth and led us all to give rubbish reccomendations. That was one of the reasons I stopped commenting because saying what is really in my mind would hurt her. How can the op of a post, come to view her own thread as a guest.

Less I forget Happy new year to you all!

Baby mama:
Excuse you!
If you wan chop the girl,go chop am
Which one is my own
She will come back with another thread and people will give advice
Every responder here is mad,jealous as u put it and you are the only sane one?
Comot jor make I find eye see berra place to do breakthrough service

My friend talk like a real baby mama...which one be chop again...how can that kind of gutter language emanate from your mouth?

If she decided to take my advice which one is your own....why are you angry with her? Must she take your advice even if it didn't make sense...

I know one or two things about relationships and many of you here being harsh to her here will not do any better in real life...if you don't like the fact that she talked to me ...please quietly go and get a life...

Oh you are angry that she still loves the man abi....cover your faces joor ....for some people love still exists!

@Dinachi....... can you define love in a simple sentence for me?

I see you are a firm believer of undying love.

Baby mama:
I came in late in this party and to the Op I would say these
How dare you insult the intelligence of people by starting a thread ,actually threads on your issues and people comment sincerely to help you then you go offline to tell details to a poster?

WOOOOOW! Hold up! Geez some of you here are really, really harsh. I did not disappear, I went to church and went out too. Wasn't available on here. I just read everything now even the fights (don't want any fight here) I have read your opinion and yes I do have parents, friends etc and they have all told me the same to forget him. They are also very upset but it's left for me to move on even without answers, even with the manner he handled it even if he didn't want to be with me again.

onegig:
Seriously, I had to laugh.
It is no secret that like 80 per cent of ladies here who have advised cosmass are married and doing well with their families. So i don"t see where your jealousy idea is coming from. No one disagrees marriage is an easy thing but why would you fight for a lost cause?
Why would you fight for someone who has clearly told you, you dont figure in his plans?
Cossmass is even making excuses for his outrightly rude behaviour. If you are looking for a reason he spoilt you bad during your dating then you need not go far. He sees nothing important in you and feels you are after his money and not worth being his wife. Most Nigerian guys are like that, they spend money on you, use you while having a spare gal somewhere they are grooming to marry. Its that simple. You have been used and need to move on. He intiating marriage proposals was a mistake and "the powers that be" who control him from behind the scenes hve told him you are not worth it and just useless and quite bad for you he AGREES with them.

I think it would pay off a long way for some of you commenting to at least know the background before concluding all sorts? You reall think money is the issue Let him come and tell you where he was working when I met him, the car he was even driving, My job was better than his. He was a mere banker, marketing. Even after he showed me where he stayed, his folks, what they do etc, and there was money, I still told him point blank that I wasn't really interested deeply with him that let us take it slowly so what are you talking about Mr. onegig And there is nothing like having a spare girl etc. The marriage wasn't forced. He was the one who proposed to me. He even called his folks to tell them he has proposed. From what I heard, his mum and him were even the ones to go get the ring so I don't really understand what you are talking about.

onegig:
Yes she caused the problem but what happened after is the main issue.
Why can't he forgive his potential spouse ?
Is this their first time of having disagreements?
Put yourself in the guys hoes, Your bride to be offended you, you reacted and she comes to her senses and asked for forgiveness. If you truly "wanted" her what would you have done?
If he can't forgive her, she should be the one running away from him because she would offend him 1000 times when they get married. Question is; Is she willing to be married to someone who won't forgive her misdeamenours?
Dinachi, open your eyes and reason with your brains please. I Would love you disappoint me about the preconcieved notion i have about you.
Look at the bigger picture and advise her accordingly. I

I have to agree with you on all of these. The main issue is the aftermath. Someone even told me so if you cheated, committed the worst of atrocities, then you will be finished.

kundi90:
Exactly my thoughts. She came to give us the half truth and led us all to give rubbish reccomendations. That was one of the reasons I stopped commenting because saying what is really in my mind would hurt her. How can the op of a post, come to view her own thread as a guest.
Less I forget Happy new year to you all!

Haba! Relax. I am still here. i did not give half truths, I just don't want to keep narrating the same story since based on all I've said, to move on, that's why I only wanted to email him based on his opinion.

alutacontinua:
I didn't wanna comment on this thread but the bolded above pushed me to punch the 'reply' button!
You expect her to change who she is because of love
What happened to the guy also easing up a little?
This relationship is nothing to write home about again, Cosmass should just let it go. Telling her to work on this relationship is not the best idea for her. To keep her sanity, she needs to let go!
If we follow your analogy, which to me is mere speculation, these people are not even compatible! Telling Cosmass to start watching every word that proceeds out of her mouth and living life like she's in prison is not a good idea (at least, not for her ego and sanity) and telling the guy to take her for who she is is clearly asking for too much!
Note: I'm just tryna see things from your perspective, not that I even bliv it!

People also advised me to be cautious. That assuming we marry now, I might even be scared to break plates because I now know the whole family would be involved.

Cosmass:
WOOOOOW! Hold up! Geez some of you here are really, really harsh. I did not disappear, I went to church and went out too. Wasn't available on here. I just read everything now even the fights (don't want any fight here) I have read your opinion and yes I do have parents, friends etc and they have all told me the same to forget him. They are also very upset but it's left for me to move on even without answers, even with the manner he handled it even if he didn't want to be with me again.
I think it would pay off a long way for some of you commenting to at least know the background before concluding all sorts? You reall think money is the issue Let him come and tell you where he was working when I met him, the car he was even driving, My job was better than his. He was a mere banker, marketing. Even after he showed me where he stayed, his folks, what they do etc, and there was money, I still told him point blank that I wasn't really interested deeply with him that let us take it slowly so what are you talking about Mr. onegig And there is nothing like having a spare girl etc. The marriage wasn't forced. He was the one who proposed to me. He even called his folks to tell them he has proposed. From what I heard, his mum and him were even the ones to go get the ring so I don't really understand what you are talking about.
I have to agree with you on all of these. The main issue is the aftermath. Someone even told me so if you cheated, committed the worst of atrocities, then you will be finished.
Haba! Relax. I am still here. i did not give half truths, I just don't want to keep narrating the same story since based on all I've said, to move on, that's why I only wanted to email him based on his opinion.
People also advised me to be cautious. That assuming we marry now, I might even be scared to break plates because I now know the whole family would be involved.

Happy New Year Cosmass!

I couldn't say it better than you have put it. Many people on the board are experts in condemning relationships, meanwhile if you place them in the same situation, they will do worse....it is these feminist bullshit flying around these days. The moment you have any challenge with your fiance or husband , all the feminists will advice you to leave him immediately...they don't care to know...the efforts you have put into the relationship...They just want to sound tough....and usually they don't have any option for you....they are after creating an army of bitter, misguided women who hate men with the last drop of their blood.

Like I said earlier...every relationship has a history. shalom!.. enjoy your new year orishirishi...you deserve it

dinachi:
Happy New Year Cosmass!
I couldn't say it better than you have put it. Many people on the board are experts in condemning relationships, meanwhile if you place them in the same situation, they will do worse....it is these feminist bullshit flying around these days. The moment you have any challenge with your fiance or husband , all the feminists will advice you to leave him immediately...they don't care to know...the efforts you have put into the relationship...They just want to sound tough....and usually they don't have any option for you....they are after creating an army of bitter, misguided women who hate men with the last drop of their blood.
Like I said earlier...every relationship has a history. shalom!.. enjoy your new year orishirishi...you deserve it

Happy New Year to you too!!! Thanks a lot. Sent you an email. In regards to what some of them wrote, despite them being harsh, most of them said/are saying the truth. The treatment he handled it with and to my family was really bad.

I understand there would some tiny dots of missing links OP would have left out in the summary of her disagreements with her supposed fiancee., those tiny dots when left out in her side of the story/ history sometimes distorts the message, and leads to wrong advice.

I kind of agree with dinachi's looking out of the box approach, but OP must tread with caution, it will take a miracle to save the situation and for the OP to get her feminine pride and respect back from the supposed fiancee and his family if things returns to initial status quo.

I dont also think the Op's supposed fiancee is as matured as she would want us to believe.

My only question to the op is what PARTICULAR trait or habit do you have that your supposed fiancee has consistently complained about or show GREAT displeasure in the 2 years of the relationship ?

Mrs mansson: Thought you moved on
You have to be strong girl,this life aint for softies
See when i was in school i was dating a senior in my profession,i was in 500 and he was already a Doc.words cant explain how useful he was in my studies
To me,perfect match was the right word to use.
He got a better job which he kept mute about
He relocated out of Nigeria for the job without letting me know
Got married to his childhood friend and i was notified through Facebook
I even saw him the day he was to relocate but never mentioned anything to me
He only said he was going for a seminar
It was hurtful tho,wont lie to you but i just had to be strong and tell myself that he wasnt a nice person and very inmature
I didnt place any blame on myself
A year later he called saying he was sorry and how he wouldnt have listened to his parents about marrying his wife
I told him to F^ck off
Cosmass even thou wedding date was fixed in your own case but please move on and Be strong
Tell yourself you can do it

Gbammm. Nicely. You the boss. Sometimes, I just wish I could apologise For all the wrongs done to good ladies. Thank God you moved on and never moved back. @cosmass...you summoned strength and For the future and move from the point you are. Its difficult to let go. Just avoid to be lonely at all times.