Why is it that a girl would like a guy and won't let him know? Let me know, but the truth of it is that I haven't really found my kind of girl ...

Girls prefer to be asked out because thats the tradition but some girls are moving on with times and if the guy is too slow to pick up the hints they tell him straight up...

Men deal with rejection by women all the time. We're used to hearing women we love telling us "no", "I said no", "hell, no!" But I don't think young women are used to handling rejection.

If a girl asks a guy out and he says "no", he means it. At first she might think he doesn't mean it because girls often don't mean it when they say "no". But will she be able to handle it when she finds out that "no" from a guy really means "no", even if he subsequently chooses to sleep with her?

Well, it is simple. If a girl should voice out her feelings to a guy,
[list][li]The guy will think of her as being cheap.[/li]
[li]Whenever their is a quarrel between them, the guy will want the girl to fall on her knees and apologise even if he is at fault. He will simply say ' afterall I didn't ask for your love'[/li][/list]

Most times, ladies will just let the feelings die within them without voicing out. They feel it is better that way than allowing a guy to take them for granted. Being a lady is a dignity on it's own not to talk of who the lady is and how she behaves. There is is an adage that says "if you love something, let it go. And if it is meant for you, it will come back to you no matter how long".

If a girl asks me out, I won't think of her as being cheap. I won't expect her to be the one to apologize even when I am wrong. Men that behave like that are simply immature. Ok, maybe they are suffering from gender role confusion:[list][li]Women are not used to going after love and handling rejection. Yes, rejection.[/li][li]Men are not used to being sought out by love.[/li][/list]

If my sister comes to me and says, "there is this guy, I like him ...", I'd advice her to go and tell him about it in a light manner. "Don't try to 'woo' him, just tell him you like him and would not mind a relationship. Then hang around for a while. If he says he's not interested, it means he is not interested. This is called rejection. If that happens, you can come and cry on my shoulder."

Ladies, welcome to our world!

First things first, this freaking topic is diverse, whatever point you are coming from. Well, I am a guy, and I'm not going to sit here acting like a sexist. Guys do have major problems, but girls need to sit up and stop getting used to being spoon-fed all the time. If you want something, get off your lazy ass, go get it. If the guy acts funny, dump him.

As for me I ain't got problems with women anymore. I sorted that part of my life faster then anyone can think of. I hate to boast, but if you all need coaching, hola at me. Remember, I stand by JAY-Z saying "you got 99 problems but a chick ain't one" Feel me?

"LADIES FIRST" does not apply in this case. However, some girls find it easier to ask a guy out than some find it easier to ask a guy a "favour". Anyhow, I still give it the guy who senses the girl's feelings and takes the initiative - afterall, we are the HEAD, right?

cos she wouldn't want the guy to her to be so cheap.

she wouldn't want the guy to see her so cheap.

That means she is ashame to express herself. Ladies wake up now.

num1.....most guys re so dumb that if u ask them out or give them an inclination that u've got the hots for them, they take a big advantage of u

num2..... the smart ones might develop cold feet (disappear)all of a sudden if u as a girl voice out ur feelings..... its only the sane ones that try to reason with u & u guys can see if a relationship can start or not.. but i I've come to discover that most guys wen they say No it is NO.. they dont wanna change their minds..because the girl saying " hi i think I've got the hot for u" will be offended with the rejection & wont bother to pressurize the boy..
all this makes it hard for girls to tell a guy they like him... no one likes to be rejected.. ..
so as a girl.. if u cant say it u let the feelings die in u..
but for me.. my advice is.. ""if u like him, he looks appealing to u.. go for him, if he acts funny or says 'No' ...get on with life.. there re other sweet dudes out there waiting to know u better""

yeah SHANE!
i got 99 problems but a chic ain't one!

wetin dey?

Well, let's be serious. You guys are just plain scared. Any biologist would tell you it's not natural for females to approach males unless there is an adverse effect that will occur to the male (like the black widow spider that eats the male after sex though the male has developed a way of escaping by spinning some sweet yarn to keep the female occupied.)

Of course, it would be nice if we could cut through the red tape. In the words of John Nash of Beautiful Mind fame, "since the purpose of approaching you is intercourse lets cut to chase"

reason I think is just the societal norms as some1 pointed out. I don't think I'll mind if any beautiful chic asks me out.try me!

If I like a guy I let him know in my own way.  This, for me, does not involve saying "I like you".  Instead I let my actions speak louder than words:  I'll talk to him, ask questions, maybe even call him on the phone and I'll joke around with him.  I tend to joke around with guys I like...but I do tend to joke around with a lot of people so I guess it's tough to tell what my intentions are. Part of my mystique, I guess

I think the guy should be intuitive enough to get my hints (and compare the way I'm treating him to the way I treat other guys) and realize that I like him.  That being said, if he feels the same way, he could ask me out.

I like the idea of being asked out, mostly because I'm pretty shy.  Maybe I think it sets the tone of how I want to be treated, who knows?

Man is created first and he is supposed to make initiate a move of asking a lady out and not vice versa. Any man who is shy of asking a lady out is still imature and such is not ripe yet for that kind of relationship. Maturity is high demanded in this matter. Marriage is for men not boys.

Any lady who goes out there to woo a man or entice him is tagged a "rotten egg" in our society I.e Africa. It's not our culture for a lady to ask a man out.

As for me if a lady asks me out I'll look at her as being currupt. This explains better why some lady will still say 'No' to man who asks them for a relationship even though she loves her. She doesn't want the guy to look at her as being so Cheap.

So ladies keep your "Ego" That is your pride. He who wants to dig gold will prepare to pay the price. We all go to market but what we buy is quite different becos our taste is different. If a lady is cheap for you she will be cheap for others. Take it or believe it.

Here's another way to look at it.

If you like a particular man, ask him what he would do if a girl were to propose to him.

If he says he's ok with it go ahead and do your thing

If he says otherwise (like Greatpeter) save your ego and look elsewhere.

Ask a man out? Gosh, that would be the last thing I will ever do. Mind you, it is not pride but I just can't imagine myself telling a guy how much I love him and how much I would want us to be together.

Even if I feel something for this guy, I'd rather keep it within me than make myself a subject of ridicule. What if the guy says NO? The humiliation would be too much for me to bear. Abeg let the man come after me.

See that's where you miss it. This gender confusion thing.

As a guy don't want to hear how much you love me or how much you want to go out with me. but I won't mind hearing that you love me and that you won't mind going out with me. You understand what I mean? He's not a girl, so he doesn't need any drama. Give him the ball and let him roll it ...

So If you want to ask a man out, don't ask him out the way one asks a girl out. Ask him out like he's a man.

Greatpeter, you are too African for my liking. Whats all that story about the girl being tagged a rotten egg for asking the guy out? Wake up dude!! This is the 21st century.

I'm a girl, and if I want a guy I know my ways. I don't have to go ask him out like guy would a girl out. I'll show it to him my own way. If he catches the scope, and he's a real bobo he'll set the ball rolling.

To me, there is nothing wrong for a girl to go for something that she feel is nice for her. Girls, do not be shy get it if it for you. What of if you play around me and I do not understand your intention? Please tell me that you like me and it is ok.

"Eh! No way! How can a girl ask a guy out?" Well I'm saying it but I know it ought to be so.

I'm a girl, but why should it be that only guys will come after ladies? Let dem go also if they are interested (I mean girls). But I must admit it's very difficult. I almost did it, man I was dying for this guy. And just because of shyness, another girl took him, just under my nose. Man till now, I can kill her (it happened to me twice).

So you guys out there, tell me, how should we approach you? Since you said it's not the same way you guys come to us that we should come to you.

Cutie,
      If you choose to well, you can buy a gift that speaks the reality of your desire. May be flower or a T- shirt inscribed "Love you" I am sure the guy will get it right.

Cutie,
If you choose to well, you can buy a gift that speaks the reality of your desire. May be flower or a T- shirt inscribed "Love you" I am sure the guy will get it right.

Greatpeter, don't you feel that is the easiest way to court disdain.Naija men are not known to be too great a fan of diplomacy. I feel the guy in question should be studied before a move is made. Not everyone is like you or me

I'm still waiting for the pretty chic who will give me clue...I'll dive for it

PS:
i haven't seen the ever vocal Ra's opinion in this, someone should make her see this topic

Look at him directly to his eyes wink and smile to him , he will understand your message.

Hmm, solo2 to and at a guy might be disastrous. What if he gets the wrong impression and ends up 'screwing' the lady?

tayotina:

What if he gets the wrong impression and ends up 'screwing' the lady?

Which screwing are u referring to?
Screwing as in "to take advantage of" or screwing as in "To have sexual intercourse with"

Allen,
B4 a lady develops an emotional love with an erasable passion for a man she would have studied him and seen what actually attracted and arrested her love of loves. So she needs no sign or any watch. let her go for him by signalling her uncompromised love for him. Once she knows what she wants and finds it then don't waste time.
What do you think.

Why is it that a girl would like a guy and won't let him know? Because a womans first reactions is usually i want to talk to the guy, get to know him. A guy's first reaction is she wants to get jiggi with me
totally different perceptions~

Mamba, the latter.

tayotina, I know you understand what I means and every lady will also take my word for a real, so girls go for your taste by sign from you eye if you can not talk to him directly.

We like to study the man first and we do not want to appear pushy or desperate. So we keep it on the downlow.

But personally I have debated this with myself if I would actually tell a guy that I like him. But I guess it all depends. I have a friend that asked a guy out and they are still together.

I mean one other friend told me that guys love the "hunting and taunting" game; they love to work hard to get their women and that if a woman makes it easy for them then they do not think she is worth it and they loose interest. But that depends on the guy though.

I am still considering if I would tell a guy I like him. I guess I could if I do find the guy but it is going to talk lots of courage! (nah I think I can!)