₦airaland Forum

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Tell him to grow up. pet ko, pet ni

3cycle: In a relationship that requires petting a 30 year old man and I still don't know the best way to handle it.
He is an only son with 5 sisters and I believe he was pampered all through and now I am faced with the challenge of pampering him

If I don't call early enough na war, if I don't call before bed we won't talk for a day or more.
If I don't pick his calls then I don't miss him etc..
I like him a lot because he is a good person, humble and Godfearing plus very honest.
Please guys in the house tell me how to pamper a man.

And you are still asking what you should do.

I pity the guy sha. He needs to grow up

Just wean him, apparently he is still suckling.

You should pick his calls or acknowledge his calls when you miss them. This shows commitment.

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3cycle: But those aren't big deals.... Somedays I get home to tired and I just pass out only to wake up and see. Series of missed calls and then he wouldn't let me explain because he won't pick my calls again.

In situations such as that send him an Sms first and ring him later.

No matter how pissed he is he won't fail to read your Sms

You just have to wean him, he probably is still enjoying his mum's and perhaps sister's milk......just pick his calls when you miss him then call him to order, because some guys want to carry what they have been used to into their relationships while others that had bad experinces never want to. And from the look of things this might be his ever forst relationship

3cycle: Lol@ wean him, I return his calls when I miss them but he hardly wants to hear my explanations.

Sms is a powerful weapon, employ it more often. I have a thread on Sms here, apparently you didn't read it.

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I totally agree with the peeps who advised that he stop being a baby and grow up. However, I still appreciate the fact that some petting aint bad in a relationship but this has to be reciprocal.

If he did not hear from you before bed time, it only means that he has not called you also. In your own little way, you can try to call to inquire about his well being, especially during his break time at work but this should be done to a reasonable extent.

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3cycle: Ok, but we watsapp often. Thanks will go through it

Cool.

Sms and chat msgs are different. Sms carries a different aura.

3cycle: But those aren't big deals.... Somedays I get home to tired and I just pass out only to wake up and see. Series of missed calls and then he wouldn't let me explain because he won't pick my calls again.

Thats why I said that he needs to grow up nah, n yhu should try to call him when whenable. Things wey dey dia be say 1: He doesn't trust you. 2: He doesn't trust himself. 3: He loves you more than you love him.

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One question for you. Can you handle these tantrums of his for the rest of your life?
Esp after marriage when you guys will be in each others face, can you handle the drama 24/7? Can you ?
If yes, then you already have the solution in your hands. Your question holds the answer.
Never miss his calls
Never go to bed without calling
Always call him early enough.
And, get ready to do much more after marriage cos he will expect some extras when you become wifey.
Good luck with him.

3cycle: Why should a man love a woman he doesn't trust

It is possible! We love with our hearts and think with our brains and they don't always communicate or agree. You can't just stop your feelings and our brains sometimes shut down when we are inlove. Love and Trust are important in a relationship but Love comes first. Trust takes time to build. You can love someone without trust but as far as a relationship goes you have to have trust for it to work, and that is what he is trying to do. Maybe you have given him reason to doubt or maybe he has his reasons. Remember guys don't always believe excuses women give because we know how they can fabricate millions of lies within seconds. It is his love for you that will make him trust you.



This your Monicker sef

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Bj

3cycle: Honestly I can't put up with such Drama if it prolongs... I was raised in such a way that I don't have to pamper anyone. I am strong on ma own and his actions are strange to me since this is my first rltnshp that requires pampering an adult.
Btw we haven't gotten to that stage where we discuss marriage but if he continues this way, I might throw in the towel sooner.
But for now I want to see if the problem is me, and may be we can work towards changing ourselves.

My dear, its not you he is just a big baby. What you cant withstand now, will only piss you off 10x over when you and him share a home. The relationship is already draining your energy very soon you will lose your zest for fun because he wants you around him all day.
Anyway sha, call him and tell him he has to grow up if he wants you guys to keep dating. Tell him you are feeling strained and drained and you cant keep the game going. If he changes then good for you, if he doesnt, then ehmmmmmm, you know what you want.

3cycle: Not his first rltnship, he claims I am not comitted and do not love him Enough.
He isn't a muma's boy but he loves too much attention though he gives me 100 percent of his time which due to work I haven't been able to reciprocate

Hmm, just explain to him cos who knows if this is why he quit previous relationships.....hisnt he working too to always get busy?

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3cycle: What is wrong with ma username? You prefer holes to cycles?

lols

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Buy water gun for him....wait sef why you dey refer to 30years old person as guy?

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9ja always answering questions with questions.....#he's a man and you've to make him understand that he isn't getting any younger

3cycle: Too old or too young to be called a guy?

A ship is designed to to take you places,
So if your friendSHIP, partnerSHIP, CompanionSHIP, or relationSHIP isn't taking you anywhere abandon the SHIP.

My dear as a lady you aren't suppose to be asking how to pet a grown man
instead have a rethink on the kind of relationship you having with him.

Are you a girlfriend,or a Nanny. Please tell me which you are,before I give any advice.

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