What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores - Family (3)

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What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores - Family (3) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores (33537 Views)

5 Masculine Chores I Did As A Female Child. / What Are Those House Chores That You Dont Like Doing? / Your Views On Men Who Help Their Partners With House Chores. (2) (3) (4)

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Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Nobody: 7:36am On Jul 11, 2014

GentleMimi... You are invited..

https://www.nairaland.com/1807882/seun-man/3

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by lilmax(m): 7:37am On Jul 11, 2014

Thats why i will always advise men not to depend on their wife for money,a woman will tell her husband that he must do the chores because she also provides money for the family....

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Tyche(m): 7:37am On Jul 11, 2014

@GentleMimi, don't you think that some men might have a phobia for male house help too? Cases abound of women who mess up with their house boy.

If my wife dont want a female house help, why should she want a male house help?

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by oieda: 7:37am On Jul 11, 2014

In anything, two are usually better than one. grin

1 Like

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by GentleMimi: 7:37am On Jul 11, 2014

olubukato:

oskaaay:
It is hard to trust especially when disappointed ones or couple of times......please take heart and believe that life goes on....it is well....

Thanks,bro. Some of us come out of pain stonger and wiser.

fijiano202: sorry though but now u are alot wiser..nobody can point a dog to u as lion..we mature with experience....funny thing is with all this BS happening, people still wonder why women/housewives do plastic surgerys

Thanks,bro. True talk. Lol@ plastic surgery. I consider it a situation of fear and low self-esteem.

1 Like

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by GentleMimi: 7:45am On Jul 11, 2014

Tyche: @GentleMimi, don't you think that some men might have a phobia for male house help too? Cases abound of women who mess up with their house boy.

If my wife dont want a female house help, why should she want a male house help?

I understand,and i'll respect his opinion. In that case,there will be NO househelp,male or female. Since we'll both be working,then he should be kind enough to help out. An agreement has to be made and sacrifices too. We all cannot be rigid in decision making. I will not marry a man whose love is not genuine,or selfish man in the first place.

olubukato: GentleMimi... You are invited..
https://www.nairaland.com/1807882/seun-man/3

Lol!

1 Like

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Nobody: 7:49am On Jul 11, 2014

last tin I will ever do 4 my wife house chores god 4bid..........I can takia of baby bt house chores lailai.....wic 1 sweep floor or wash dish or cloth.......I bet if u do it once she will strt claiming d house chores is meant 4 both of u.. ....mk ur mama com visit... .Heeee she don jazz my son...lol

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Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Nobody: 7:49am On Jul 11, 2014

Nice

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by jericco1(m): 7:57am On Jul 11, 2014

Well I did promise my future wife that I would help her presently, but when we finally get married she gonna do the rest.

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Dygeasy(m): 8:00am On Jul 11, 2014

ireneidiva:
Crap. And what makes you think women don't work and come home in the evening tired too. Who told you women do not read motivational books, invest or know computer languages? You want to come back from work and scatter your clothes. Anyway I pity your wife. What kind of women even marry these Nairaland men Anyway, you are still a kid. You really can't be mature with this mentality.

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Dygeasy(m): 8:01am On Jul 11, 2014

ireneidiva:
Crap. And what makes you think women don't work and come home in the evening tired too. Who told you women do not read motivational books, invest or know computer languages? You want to come back from work and scatter your clothes. Anyway I pity your wife. What kind of women even marry these Nairaland men Anyway, you are still a kid. You really can't be mature with this mentality.

lol!

He is immature but it is what he wants.

Best you can do is pity his wife.

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Ninapha(f): 8:03am On Jul 11, 2014

cheksbry: I couldn't help but comment,very cool comment

thnks Cheksbry. But thats one secret way to make ur hubby run coming home. Abi no be so? Lol.

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by fijiano202(m): 8:03am On Jul 11, 2014

GentleMimi:

Thanks,bro. Some of us come of of pain stonger and wiser.
Thanks,bro. True talk. Lol@ plastic surgery. I consider it a situation of fear and low self-esteem.

not all is abt low self-esteem,u are right abt fear though..every housewife wanna look young so that her husband wont call her fat or ugly,i have a close aunt who once complain abt her husband lack of action in the Bedroom,that made her feel unwanted and ugly....As a lady am sure u understand that men are born with lust but we learn to control it but some cant....what i dont really understand abt we men are how we may be dating ladies like omotola and yvonne nelson but end up lusting after ladies like enjema Emperess i.e ugly ladies

1 Like

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by oskaaay(m): 8:04am On Jul 11, 2014

jericco1: Well I did promise my future wife that I would help her presently, but when we finally get married she gonna do the rest.

oga jerrico.....hmmmmm.....remember marriage vows oooo...tell her now so she will stay...let her stay than pending sweet-mounting her for what will not happen ooooooo....my advise.....to avoid future marriage crashing ..... grin

1 Like

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Tyche(m): 8:05am On Jul 11, 2014

GentleMimi:
I understand,and i'll respect his opinion. In that case,there will be NO househelp,male or female. Since we'll both be working,then he should be kind enough to help out. An agreement has to be made and sacrifices too. We all cannot be rigid in decision making. I will not marry a man whose love is not genuine,or selfish man in the first place.

Since you are career woman, there will come a point when, due to the schedule on both parts, you will definitely need a house help. I hope the decision don't create issues.

I understand your fears, but most men would never stoop so low to have an affair with the house girl, except perhaps He stays home all day and madam no dey coperate. This does not mean I support having such affairs.

1 Like

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by kodewrita(m): 8:05am On Jul 11, 2014

Pay someone to come in and help out once in a while. You do not have to do it ALL.

A non-live-in housekeeper who comes once a week to wash all laundry and sweep the place would not be a bad idea. if she can run market errands, even better.
Add a dishwasher for the plates and you are good to go.

3 Likes

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by oskaaay(m): 8:07am On Jul 11, 2014

kodewrita: Pay someone to come in and help out once in a while. You do not have to do it ALL.

A non-live-in housekeeper who comes once a week to wash all laundry and sweep the place would not be a bad idea. if she can run market errands, even better.
Add a dishwasher for the plates and you are good to go.

coool.....

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by jericco1(m): 8:11am On Jul 11, 2014

oskaaay:

oga jerrico.....hmmmmm.....remember marriage vows oooo...tell her now so she will stay...let her stay than pending sweet-mounting her for what will not happen ooooooo....my advise.....to avoid future marriage crashing .....

lol she understands, i'll struggle for the future. our marriage is safe and Loud

1 Like

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by ceasare: 8:12am On Jul 11, 2014

@ninapha: u ve said it all
@gentle Mimi: that's how a good wife and mother should be at home.
Well from my own perspective our ladies watch too much foreign movies and feel the home front should be a two people party where households chores are divided btw husband and wife like its don't abroad but we forget our ccultures are different. In their culture bills are shared equally and couples are independent of each other so sharing the chores is non negotiable.back to our own culture non of us grew seeing our dad cook or sweep or do any household chores regardless of his financial contributions towards upkeep of the family!
Back to our time husbands are not ready to chip in an helping hand because the wife feels she works too and contribute to the finances so the husband can do the dishes for all she cares or better still get a house help while the husband feels after hustling his ass out and going through goring traffic he won't come home and start doing the dishes from last night dinner! In all I think understanding your partners strength and weakness will go a long way in keeping d home front .
For me what works best is that I studied my madam I knw she can cook for a nation as in she is delighted to cook diff meals for me and the kids 3x a day and she can wash clothes you are yet to use down today and her weakness is she hates ironing clothes so I do most of the things she doesn't like doing at my convenience and everybody is happy.
Though I compel her to do those chores once in a while when am at my low maybe when I hv gone thru Lagos gruelling traffic....she knows when Oga voice don't change.
Note we have 2 lil kids and no house help ! Though we have a baby sitter that comes in every 2 weeks when she has to work full day on saturday and she sits d kids and general housekeeping and no cooking.
Every couple should look for what works best for them .

2 Likes

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by maryhaam(f): 8:15am On Jul 11, 2014

moderatorr: If she can't keep my house heavenly clean and still cook a very nice dish on top of it while i watch TV, then she should leave and let a woman who can do it take her place.

I need to eat and leave the plates there, remove my shoe in the palour then go to my room on barefoot
Play with my kids and scatter everywhere!
Only to wake up the next morning and see everywhere clean again. If she can't do it, she should leave.
Do you know what we men face everyday? And you expect us to comeback to the house and start helping you with chores again, why did i marry you in the first place? If na s*x, ashawo full every where nah.

While we were young, you were using all your money for samsung galaxy S39 and brazillian hair, blackberry nails, long eye lashes and dating multiple older men. while we were reading motivational books, investing in series and series of failed business just to get the experience, being an apprentice for years with all the insults involved just to make it, boycotting parties and shows to save time and money, learning painful computer language after language, learning to pastor a church, lead a team, work all night, solicit for funds, perfecting our use of spoken and written english etc
Now when we finally make it and marry you, you want us to come and help you with house chores, if i suuulaaaaaaaaaaaaap you!

This is how many marriages fail
Option 1
Woman == Lazy with house chores
Man doesn't care
Woman invites househelp
Man gets househelp pregnant!

Option 2
Woman == lazy to cook
Man == eats at the cafeteria everyday after work
Man impregnates cafeteria woman's daughter!

Option 3
Woman == lazy to fork
Man == realizes his secretary is actually s*xy
Man impregnates secretary!

lmao Loooool can't wait to get married

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by oskaaay(m): 8:17am On Jul 11, 2014

jericco1:

lol she understands, i'll struggle for the future. our marriage is safe and Loud

okay ooo...wishing you well in life oooooo.... grin

While you dey calm with the comment. Check out doctors/nurses jobs opportunity abroad at http://careerpingger.revlisimo.org/jobs-for-nigerian-doctors-and-nurses-in-saudi-and-qatar/ and inform friends......

1 Like

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by oskaaay(m): 8:19am On Jul 11, 2014

oskaaay: It’s Saturday and despite a BUSY week, you’re up early again. You drag yourself out of bed and start facing chores. You make breakfast, your darling husband eats, leaves his dishes on the table and moves to the Living room to enjoy T.V (despite the fact that the living room needs some cleaning up). Your kids are very young and can’t help much with chores. You’re exhausted and tensed, yet all the clutter stares you in the face. But what riles you the most? Of course! It’s the sight of your sweetheart concentrated on the TV, totally unconcerned about your running here and there!

MARRIAGE TIPS NOBODY TELLS US…

Unfortunately, the scene described above is quite common in these parts. What to do? Consider these tips:

What-to-do-when-husband-won't-help-around-house-mamagidi

TALK to him about it. Try to communicate your feelings without sounding confrontational.
THE few occasions on which he offers to help, accept it (even if you don’t really need his help at the time).
WHEN he helps out, give him a treat. It doesn’t have to involve spending money. Just make sure it communicates your thoughtfulness and appreciation. Knowledge of your husband’s turn-ons should come in handy here.
4 IMPORTANT REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD GET HELP

ACCEPT the fact that he may NEVER be as concerned as you are about housekeeping.
DON’T be a boss-lady. It’s a complete turn-off for most men!
IF he doesn’t do something to your satisfaction, don’t adjust it immediately in his presence. You know how you used to feel back then when mum came into the kitchen and threw all the dishes you just washed back in the sink.
YOUR TEENAGER AND CHORES

KNOW when to ask for help. You definitely don’t want to ask him to help with the trash can while he’s boiling- or worse, hungry!
FINALLY, and very importantly, if you know where patience is sold, don’t hesitate to use up your bank accounts on it. BUY IN BULK!
Hope you find these tips helpful. If you know of any other tips that can get our husbands off their seats and helping around the house, please feel free to share!
http://www.mamagidi.com/husband-wont-help-house-chores/

Hope new readers/guests are still keeping to the talk of the day...if you missed it...that is the main TOPIC in qoute above for the day ooo....add your view....e se oooo (thank you in YORUBA language....)

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by jericco1(m): 8:21am On Jul 11, 2014

oskaaay:

okay ooo...wishing you well in life oooooo....

While you dey calm with the comment. Check out doctors/nurses jobs opportunity abroad at http://careerpingger.revlisimo.org/jobs-for-nigerian-doctors-and-nurses-in-saudi-and-qatar/ and inform friends......

I'm an Un-science, hope there's something as such... #well i know a few D/N.

1 Like

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Nobody: 8:25am On Jul 11, 2014

Let's be realistic here not cos we r online, a normal guy lives probably alone for a while b4 marriage. Weren't u doin ur hus chores? Dats one. 2. Men rantin abt ladies doin all d work while men go out nd husle. Sure. Y not if ur wife will be a hus wife. I don't have any problem wit dat, but if she goes to work too nd comes home late den dats been inconsiderate. As for me my fiancee does d work in his hus nd its ok by me. Wen we get marid, ill do d ones I can wen I'm not @ work den get a maid who comes say morn to eve or weekends. Shikena. I no come life come dey do hus work. Haba!

5 Likes

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by oskaaay(m): 8:26am On Jul 11, 2014

jericco1:

I'm an Un-science, hope there's something as such... #well i know a few D/N.

yeah there is(could recommend to friends)..... still communicating with two doctors (friend and brother) that got employed there this year and doing fine.....

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Trecixnine(m): 8:34am On Jul 11, 2014

Kanwulia: Please, stop making them to feel 'all important'!
I DO IT MYSELF!
A husband's role is for PROCREATION only.
The rest, I can do FOR/BY MYSELF!

I nor sen am o! Hiahnn!

Why did.you.sound so bitter? Have you forgotten that some husbands stay with their wives even when females' fertility problems pose challenges to procreation for years? Please don't prescribe a 'one size fits all' solution to the issue raised.

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by oskaaay(m): 8:35am On Jul 11, 2014

Trecixnine:

Why did.you.sound so bitter? Have you forgotten that some husbands stay with their wives even when females' fertility problems pose challenges to procreation for years? Please don't prescribe a 'one size fits all' solution to the issue raised.

hmmmmmmm.... grin

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by GlorifiedTunde(m): 8:37am On Jul 11, 2014

*Please Don't Quote If You Can't Understand *

House chore is nobody's sole duty! It baffles me when a guy thinks its the woman's duty to do chores. Who laundered your clothes, did your dishes, swept your room, etc before you got married? angry

You come marry finish, carry your leg for chair like say na househelp you marry. shioo!

Any man who thinks in such way is still living in the STONE AGE!

Now me clamour for our wives to also work and bring in some income, she goes to work and comes back tired and you expect her to do all that herculean chores and also make love to u? HAAA! YOU MUST BE A WICKED MAN!

Even if you can't cook, you should be good at doing dishes, washing her clothes and pressing them.

Ladies better know the Kain man dem go marry, and don't spoil him immediately after wedding. Make him assist before babies start rolling in so that he gets used to it.

After now, some OLD SCHOOL PUNKS be like "I can't wash my wife's undies"

SHIOOOO!!! angry

18 Likes 1 Share

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Blockus: 8:39am On Jul 11, 2014

GlorifiedTunde: *Please Don't Quote If You Can't Understand *

House chore is nobody's sole duty! It baffles me when a guy thinks its the woman's duty to do chores. Who laundered your clothes, did your dishes, swept your room, etc before you got married?

You come marry finish, carry your leg for chair like say na househelp you marry. shioo!

Any man who thinks in such way is still living in the STONE AGE!

Now me clamour for our wives to also work and bring in some income, she goes to work and comes back tired and you expect her to do all that herculean chores and also make love to u? HAAA! YOU MUST BE A WICKED MAN!

Even if you can't cook, you should be good at doing dishes, washing her clothes and pressing them.

Ladies better know the Kain man dem go marry, and don't spoil him immediately after wedding. Make him assist before babies start rolling in so that he gets used to it.

After now, some OLD SCHOOL PUNKS be like "I can't wash my wife's undies"

SHIOOOO!!!

I like the style wey you use dey find fhuck online.

May God bless your hussle.

Mr. Ladies man.

2 Likes

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by worksmart(m): 8:41am On Jul 11, 2014

The best answer and simple truth

claireshan: if he doesn't want to help me,,, I will do it myself

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Nobody: 8:45am On Jul 11, 2014

I will marry a man like my father! I remember my mum and him shared d housechores

He wasn't sloppy, very organised man!!
On saturdays he works like mad at home together with mum and u see them doing competition on first to finish

He did d cars, his clothes,mopped d floors
Mum did d kitchen,bathroom,dusting,our clothes!!!

That was how it went till we grew up and took over, he works and mum worked too even when she became a housewife he still helps out on saturdays!!

I think the way some of us will run our homes will be a reflection of the homes we come from.

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: What To Do When Your Husband Won’t Help With House Chores by Nobody: 8:46am On Jul 11, 2014

cdamsel: So also it's your duty to make money

Exactly baby

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