Sophyrocks:

I totally agree with you on the bolded. some men are like that because they were not trained to do chores by their mothers. A man who was trained to do chores right from a young age would see absolutely nothing wrong in helping out wth the chores. If he had always had househelps all his life, it would be impossble for him to ever try at all. So if a lady notices this about a man while single, she shouldnt expect him to help out after marriage. The only thing she can do is hire a househelp/get washing machine, dish washer and others that would ease the burden. These the husband would have to provide for her. People who have these do not ever see chores as a problem.

...That is just what i was trying to make her see..a way out of the problem,but here she is talking about lack of love and all..smh.

Ngokafor:


..I am sorry,but what exactly is your point?..

my point is, the fact that u ve never done something in the past does not mean u cant learn now. At least when, a man becomes a father for the first time, he has to learn how to nurture,teach and play with his child, so he shd be able to make sacrifices for his wife. We all make efforts to succeed in our career and r/ships with family, friends, neighbours and children, strive to own properties, be hygienic, run successful businesses,etc. But when it comes to marriage, we expect that the other person shd bring more to the table. Go figure.

Ngokafor:


...That is just what i was trying to make her see..a way out of the problem,but here she is talking about lack of love and all..
..perhaps to her men who cannot do chores do not deserve to get married..smh.

No. She is also right. A lack of love is also another reason for some men. These men see marriage as a quest to fulfill all righteousness and really feel less than men when they do chores. Its a crush on their ego. It has to do with the way they see women and marriage while single. I have a friend who feels that if he is the only one at home, he will cook. but if a female is in his midst, he cannot cook. Even if the female is a visitor o. if she wants to eat, she must cook by herself. You see that kind of messed-up mentality? Now this guy says he wants to marry. what is his reason? Because he is tired of cooking and cleaning all by himself. Imagine that.

So you see. So many messed-up mentalities out there are also reasons. Lack of love because they married to fulfill all righteousness is also a reason.

missojugo:


You will age quite fast with all the stress. Even our mothers and grandmothers had relatives staying with them to help out with housework!

Assssssssshually. . . .
I age faster when the husband is at home.
Just his presence alone. . . .
I get tired of seeing his wor-wor face you know. . . .

dimples2: I will marry a man like my father! I remember my mum and him shared d housechores

He wasn't sloppy, very organised man!!
On saturdays he works like mad at home together with mum and u see them doing competition on first to finish

He did d cars, his clothes,mopped d floors
Mum did d kitchen,bathroom,dusting,our clothes!!!

That was how it went till we grew up and took over, he works and mum worked too even when she became a housewife he still helps out on saturdays!!

I think the way some of us will run our homes will be a reflection of the homes we come from.

Agreed!

kibo:

Can you say this to your father ?

Yes!

egopersonified:

my point is, the fact that u ve never done something in the past does not mean u cant learn now. At least when, a man becomes a father for the first time, he has to learn how to nurture,teach and play with his child, so he shd be able to make sacrifices for his wife. We all make efforts to succeed in our career and r/ships with family, friends, neighbours and children, strive to own properties, be hygienic, run successful businesses,etc. But when it comes to marriage, we expect that the other person shd bring more to the table. Go figure.

You are absolutely right. But this your opinion means absolutely nothing to men full of Ego and pride, who see chores as a crush on their ego, who married simply because they need househelp to help them with the chores. The mentality of a man while single matters a lot. A lot these man marry for flimsy reasons and not because of Love. Your opinion only matters to men who see women as their partners for life and build their marriages on the right foundation.

claireshan: Nah am not

Guys.... Following mode ASAP!

GentleMimi:
Back to sender! Loool.
I did not grow up around a househelp. The stories i hear about them has sent shivers down my spine. My cousin's story is a reminder of what can happen to your home,despite ur good intentions.

Gist us now...

princefunmi:

Wait till you get married and have children. Then come back and comment on the thread.

smartchoice:



Guys.... Following mode ASAP!

Trecixnine:

Why did.you.sound so bitter? Have you forgotten that some husbands stay with their wives even when females' fertility problems pose challenges to procreation for years? Please don't prescribe a 'one size fits all' solution to the issue raised.

Did I beg them?
Na who sen dem message?

Ninapha:

No be small 'hiahnne.

Me i dont like chores-loving hubby oo. He can wash his cloths dats aright but as in cleaning d house or running around in the kitchen, i no fancy am.

I love to wow him wit my cooking and loves to see him smile when he sees his scatter-scatter has been arranged. But i love the treat dat follows shaa. Even if i ask dat time, i shl recieve double.

Your own good o.
Una still dey for the 'wowing phase'?

I just prefer him to wait in his room. . . .till he is needed.
He is always in THE WAY!
He can only clean cars good and cook VERRRRY WELL!
The house?
It would have been better he did not even bother. . . .

Sheeeeeeeeeeesh!

I know a few men who helps their wives with chores.....ma sis hubby is an example. You need to see the scenario so romantic...I envy her atimes though! When a husband helps with chores a home it helps to create an impact for others...especially the kids.....it portrays love and care!

[b][/b]

GentleMimi: Right now,i do all house chores without help from anybody,and i'm working. I find it difficult to beg too. If i ask u nicely for something and u refuse.i might ask u a second time if i really love u. But there will never be a third time.
I'll simply do the best i can to tidy up and do other chores. The one wey i no fit do,i leave am jejely. If it becomes too much for me to handle,i'll consider a male house help. Female help is out of bound in my home...lol!

Female help is out of bound in my home...lol!
[/quote] Hiannnnnnn........you ll consider a male house help.It seems u don't like ur female daugthers. My dear u can put a female house help on check or worst still u can't stop a promiscous husband no matter how hard u try. Pls I can't take d risk of some lunatics using finger to break my daugthers hymen.

moderatorr: If she can't keep my house heavenly clean and still cook a very nice dish on top of it while i watch TV, then she should leave and let a woman who can do it take her place.


I need to eat and leave the plates there, remove my shoe in the palour then go to my room on barefoot
Play with my kids and scatter everywhere!
Only to wake up the next morning and see everywhere clean again. If she can't do it, she should leave.
Do you know what we men face everyday? And you expect us to comeback to the house and start helping you with chores again, why did i marry you in the first place? If na s*x, ashawo full every where nah.

Guy,u suppose go village go pick a maid and just impregnate her. finish

moderatorr: While we were young, you were using all your money for samsung galaxy S39 and brazillian hair, blackberry nails, long eye lashes and dating multiple older men. while we were reading motivational books, investing in series and series of failed business just to get the experience, being an apprentice for years with all the insults involved just to make it, boycotting parties and shows to save time and money, learning painful computer language after language, learning to pastor a church, lead a team, work all night, solicit for funds, perfecting our use of spoken and written english etc

Why don't you marry one of those who wasted your cash then and know its vengance matter?

Excuse me, do you check the statistics of working mums these days? they also contribute to the upkeep of the house, and you still expect them to come back home and do all the chores without help, when she breaks down or ages on time, its this same you that will see she is no longer presentable and go for other women, i am most sure, you didnt marry for love and togetherness,.

moderatorr: Now when we finally make it and marry you, you want us to come and help you with house chores, if i suuulaaaaaaaaaaaaap you!

Slap? i bet you, with some kind of women, that is the last you will do.
Forget us being the weaker sex, we are begining to be wise too.

moderatorr: This is how many marriages fail
Option 1
Woman == Lazy with house chores
Man doesn't care
Woman invites househelp
Man gets househelp pregnant!

Option 2
Woman == lazy to cook
Man == eats at the cafeteria everyday after work
Man impregnates cafeteria woman's daughter!

Option 3
Woman == lazy to fork
Man == realizes his secretary is actually s*xy
Man impregnates secretary!

For men like you, even if you have a good homely and hardworking wife, you will still impregnate someone outside cos you are just a playboy.

lilmax: Thats why i will always advise men not to depend on their wife for money,a woman will tell her husband that he must do the chores because she also provides money for the family....

A man must not do the chores. its the woman's duty but lending a helping hand is a way of appreciating her multiple roles in the family.

I subscribe to men doing chores at home. Its the TYPE of chores I am very much choosy.

If my wife is secularly employed a lot of electronic devices (washing machine, dishwasher, microwave for my already prepared and refridgerated meals) can help to make her job easier a lot.

The way the house is set up can also make the job easier. Tiled floors, leather seats etc

As I said earlier, I define chores into manly chores and feminine chores. Cooking, doing dishes, cleaning the house, laundry etc are women chores or at least they should see to it that it is done. Handling the generator, shutting the gate at night, nailing broken panels, taking out the thrash, cutting trees and gardening, fixing and washing the vehicle(s), fixing electronics and co are manly tasks. So just as I wont want my wife to go fixing the coil or panel in the generator or changing my vehicle oil, she should damn not expect me to start sweeping the house.

Many of our african girls are deluded by the western media which has brainwashed them into thinking they can live like westerners. Thus, after seeking an independent feminist life, they want a life like that. When they get married they want their men to act the way they see in soaps, sex nd d city etc. Strangely enough many western woman are not even like that but our gullible african girls swallow hook line and sinker what they hear and watch. My brothers wife is a german in berlin and she does household chores like a wizard while me and my bro drink beer/watch bundesliga.

From a biblical point of view a woman should have deep respect for her man. Would you be having respect for your man by asking him to go prepare breakfast in bed for you?? Some stupid western fantasy Is it respect to sit while your man is sweeping the living room?? Strangely most of the stupid girls commenting here will go to their brothers house and if they see him scrubbing the toilet while his new wife is watching desperate housewives they will go ballistic hissing around the whole place and giving her hell.

@Sophyrocks and Ngokafor, respect you guys, was afraid it would degenerate to one of those nl insults. Thanks for sharing.

GlorifiedTunde: *Please Don't Quote If You Can't Understand *

House chore is nobody's sole duty! It baffles me when a guy thinks its the woman's duty to do chores. Who laundered your clothes, did your dishes, swept your room, etc before you got married?

You come marry finish, carry your leg for chair like say na househelp you marry. shioo!

Any man who thinks in such way is still living in the STONE AGE!

Now me clamour for our wives to also work and bring in some income, she goes to work and comes back tired and you expect her to do all that herculean chores and also make love to u? HAAA! YOU MUST BE A WICKED MAN!

Even if you can't cook, you should be good at doing dishes, washing her clothes and pressing them.

Ladies better know the Kain man dem go marry, and don't spoil him immediately after wedding. Make him assist before babies start rolling in so that he gets used to it.

After now, some OLD SCHOOL PUNKS be like "I can't wash my wife's undies"

SHIOOOO!!!

you are one of the few men who are very realistic. the men those days have full housewives, they solely provide for the family making them tired by the time they are back and the woman has all the time to do the chores. but now so many things have changed. some women leave their houses by 6 and return 6 and in case of lag some 8 or 9, and u are both tired, she still has to enter kitchen and do all the work and u still want her to satisfy ur room desires, how can? some funny men will even tell you they want fresh food. i laugh in hindi

my job is to make money and children...kpom

hahaha, we wont keep running home,unless you sustain it, lol.....

Ninapha:

thnks Cheksbry. But thats one secret way to make ur hubby run coming home. Abi no be so? Lol.

egopersonified: @Sophyrocks and Ngokafor, respect you guys, was afraid it would degenerate to one of those nl insults. Thanks for sharing.

Hey come on!! You are afraid of the regular E-war in Nairaland? You should have a tough skin for those. Could be fun sometimes.
This discussion does not call for such so no worries.

You are welcome.

atleast i use to help my dear sweep the sitting room during the weekend no big deal in dat

D way some men/boys dey sound 4 here,na wa o

My friends always tell me that who ever I marry wuld be the most luckiest lady on earth! I love to work naturally and I don't see myself as a workerholic just that I am very organized and love to see my environment organized and well taken care off. In a family of 3 I am the 2nd born and do all the works in the house without calling on anybody to help. Some times they are forced to help me Bcus they feel the work is too much for me.. For me it makes me happy when I satisfy myself with the cleanings... I also cook well my friends prepare to buy stuffs for me to cook and we all eat than going to some eatery to waste funds...
When I get married, I don't see anything changing other than my wife begging me not to do some work Bcus of what people would say... I rely don't care... All I want is a neat organized clean environment and I know how to fix this right on time... After all this work I give my self a special treat too...... I'm not asking for Ur likes but you can Like it if you Like how I like to work
Happy Friday fellas! House cleaning tomorrow

fijiano202: fried fish is better ,try Pomo(kanda) or crayfish lol

LWKM! Ahswsear,no be lie.

smartchoice:
Gist us now...

Tatafo.

Evanscoth: [b][/b]
Female help is out of bound in my home...lol!
Hiannnnnnn........you ll consider a male house help.It seems u don't like ur female daugthers. My dear u can put a female house help on check or worst still u can't stop a promiscous husband no matter how hard u try. Pls I can't take d risk of some lunatics using finger to break my daugthers hymen.

And in a case where u have only male kids,are they gonna use fingers to destroy the anus? Or break the prick?

GentleMimi:
LWKM! Ahswsear,no be lie.


Tatafo.


And in a case where u have only male kids,are they gonna use fingers to destroy the anus? Or break the prick?

They might not do that o but what if the houseboy is gay?

dopedealer: My friends always tell me that who ever I marry wuld be the most luckiest lady on earth! I love to work naturally and I don't see myself as a workerholic just that I am very organized and love to see my environment organized and well taken care off. In a family of 3 I am the 2nd born and do all the works in the house without calling on anybody to help. Some times they are forced to help me Bcus they feel the work is too much for me.. For me it makes me happy when I satisfy myself with the cleanings... I also cook well my friends prepare to buy stuffs for me to cook and we all eat than going to some eatery to waste funds...
When I get married, I don't see anything changing other than my wife begging me not to do some work Bcus of what people would say... I rely don't care... All I want is a neat organized clean environment and I know how to fix this right on time... After all this work I give my self a special treat too...... I'm not asking for Ur likes but you can Like it if you Like how I like to work
Happy Friday fellas! House cleaning tomorrow

...Your wife will be a lucky woman indeed!..
..by the way, i loveee how you like to work not even like,my belle is doing tininitana!..hehe..

egopersonified: @Sophyrocks and Ngokafor, respect you guys, was afraid it would degenerate to one of those nl insults. Thanks for sharing.

..Respect to you too babes..even thought i do not exactly agree with you..lol..

GlorifiedTunde: *Please Don't Quote If You Can't Understand *

House chore is nobody's sole duty! It baffles me when a guy thinks its the woman's duty to do chores. Who laundered your clothes, did your dishes, swept your room, etc before you got married?

You come marry finish, carry your leg for chair like say na househelp you marry. shioo!

Any man who thinks in such way is still living in the STONE AGE!

Now me clamour for our wives to also work and bring in some income, she goes to work and comes back tired and you expect her to do all that herculean chores and also make love to u? HAAA! YOU MUST BE A WICKED MAN!

Even if you can't cook, you should be good at doing dishes, washing her clothes and pressing them.

Ladies better know the Kain man dem go marry, and don't spoil him immediately after wedding. Make him assist before babies start rolling in so that he gets used to it.

After now, some OLD SCHOOL PUNKS be like "I can't wash my wife's undies"

SHIOOOO!!!

Sir, please tell them. My dad would come home and pound yam for himself and my mum when they got married. My uncle can't let anyone clear his dishes after a meal. Both are amongst 2 of Nigeria's wealthiest men. One of my uncles said "when you see a man bossying his wife around, like a slave, it's poverty mentality. Because they are not used to having people help them so once they have someone under them, they try and subjugate them". Walai, it's true: my sis-in-law doesn't share our background and she's always rude to our helps. Same with one guy who was on my case. He was watching "Masterchef" but when I asked if he would make what he saw for me, he replied "never can I enter the kitchen, it's your job". Boys from good, upscale backgrounds have been trained to be polite to the staff because we know we're priviledged, not like jerks. Your manhood is intact if you help around the home you built and share with your wife! I don't get it, marriage is not a company, why do people like to be "in charge" of a marriage or be selfish

Kanwulia: Please, stop making them to feel 'all important'!
I DO IT MYSELF!
A husband's role is for PROCREATION only.
The rest, I can do FOR/BY MYSELF!

I nor sen am o! Hiahnn!

Will you marry me?