NAIJA

Lovexme:

One hausa girl keeps disturbing my phone. She once flashed my phone by 3am last week too.

I don't know her o

haha one man too keeps disturbing me....hin go say hello wayo!

ggrin: 11:yoruba go dy shout ontop fone
12:hausa go dy call wrong number
13:ibo

When you call a fat hausa man Alhaji, and the skinny one abok!

Those calls from Hausa pple na sometin else, there is no 3 month interval wey I no dey receive dia mistaken call, d worst part be say, these pple no dey ever speak even ordinary pidgin....
If dem call u so, not even simple "Hello" dem don start to dey blow dia language...after 2x of dem calling me and start blowing dat dia language, I changed tactics, instead of saying na wrong number, If dey begin blow Hausa, I start saying gibberish in response, mimicking hausa language sort of....for my mind I dey say...“una pple and wrong number...shebi na Hausa u dey speak for me, u go hear am today na, I go jonse u tire"....and d funi part is dat they will keep repeating their statement and I keep saying rubbish in Hausa accent till they cut the call...I tire for those pple, everytime wrong number....90% of wrong calls I receive na dem.....haba.

broadminded: One of the majour signs you've been in Nigeria for too long is when you know a man called Honourable Patrick Obahiagbon and a woman called Patience Jonathan.

yin and yang

ggrin: haha one man too keeps disturbing me....hin go say hello wayo!

You sure say no be that aboki wey dey down the road?

1.wen evry noodles is ur indomie.2 wen evry toothpaste is ur maclean.3.wen evry star playas of d club u suport is bein refers 2 as ur pikin.4wen u exchange ur franchise rights 4 #500 durin election.5wen political T.shirt or polo stil ur best outin

6.Wen u stil call ur pastor daddy as a sign of honour.if u fall 2 any of these categories u don tail 4 naija

.

optimumprimus: not everyone is uncivilized like you . that is why there are numerous communicable diseases in Nigeria . why the fvkc would you eat with your hands . that is nasty! Nigeria needs to be recolonized.

**breaths deep**

I'll stop replying until you understand the phrase "wash your hands before and after eating".

pesty100: yin and yang

More like, push and pull.

.

efec: u tend to shout up nepa any time power is restored..

surprised wen power is on 4 too long.even complain atimes

U are very correct While shopping online,I only decide to buy or not to buy after converting to naira.That's the only way I can tag it as expensive or cheap.I wonder how I'll adjust if I commot this Naija.

anitank: I always have my calculator anytime I go shopping at the mall or the local markets outside the country. Can't buy a thing without calculating the naira value . I no buy oo if I feel it's too expensive

This always cracks my friends and colleagues up but wetin concern me

And yes that's a sign too

optimumprimus: who gives a fvck what you have to say ? Nigeria needs to be recolonized .

If you think I'll reply you when you can't understand a phrase, then you must be really overestimating yourself.

ggrin: 11:yoruba go dy shout ontop fone
12:hausa go dy call wrong number
13:ibo

IBO go dey lie on top phone!!!!!

Loool...I tire for them my broda

Normality: Those calls from Hausa pple na sometin else, there is no 3 month interval wey I no dey receive dia mistaken call, d worst part be say, these pple no dey ever speak even ordinary pidgin....
If dem call u so, not even simple "Hello" dem don start to dey blow dia language...after 2x of dem calling me and start blowing dat dia language, I changed tactics, instead of saying na wrong number, If dey begin blow Hausa, I start saying gibberish in response, mimicking hausa language sort of....for my mind I dey say...“una pple and wrong number...shebi na Hausa u dey speak for me, u go hear am today na, I go jonse u tire"....and d funi part is dat they will keep repeating their statement and I keep saying rubbish in Hausa accent till they cut the call...I tire for those pple, everytime wrong number....90% of wrong calls I receive na dem.....haba.

Lovexme:

You sure say no be that aboki wey dey down the road?

the aboki sef fit be u

its a country where u c keke driver cursing SUV owner, "to remove this carton from the road"

For Naija you fit buy everything 4 go slow!

ggrin: 11:yoruba go dy shout ontop fone
12:hausa go dy call wrong number
13:ibo

You got me laughing@hausa go dey call wrong number!

na that soup wey dat white guy dey chop go make am,him no go like go him country

optimumprimus: not everyone is uncivilized like you . that is why there are numerous communicable diseases in Nigeria . why the fvkc would you eat with your hands . that is nasty! Nigeria needs to be recolonized.

Abeg, make una dryv dis mumu comot er!

ggrin: 11:yoruba go dy shout ontop fone
12:hausa go dy call wrong number
13:ibo

Igbo man go dey call 20 20 plots, mirrion mirrion.

Oguntimmy: U pick race(350km/h)...when u hear Gbuuu!*bomb sound*

Hahahahaha

500GP: WHEN EASTERNERS SEE LAGOS AS NEW YORK

Offcourse now...Lagos is the NewYork of Africa.

ggrin: 11:yoruba go dy shout ontop fone
12:hausa go dy call wrong number
13:ibo

ibi do werin

WoodcrestMayor: You become apprehensive/expectant when you've had 12hrs of uninterrupted power supply...u don know say na 2days of blackout go follow

haha! true!!

TearsOfTheSun: 11. You collect bags of Rice from politicians during election time

and wont bother coming out dat day to vote 4 them

U only bother/complain abt Nepa wen ur phone battery is low

ggrin: the aboki sef fit be u

That means na u be the hausa girl..I don catch u today