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Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Romance › . (4924 Views)

. by LaurelP(op): 2:19pm On Aug 08, 2014*

1 Like

Re: . by Nobody: 2:26pm On Aug 08, 2014

..you av wasted her tym already...7 yrs s jst too long..u shud av atleast let her knw ur intentions all dis while....because of u she go don loss many opportunities....

3 Likes

Re: . by ajasbaba(m): 2:27pm On Aug 08, 2014

honestly speaking 7yrs is not a joke,

why keep a lady for seven yrs when you know u wont marry her,

really i think she have a point falling in love can be difficult for her again,

dont marry out of pity,but marry her because she is worth it.

2 Likes

Re: . by LaurelP(op): 2:29pm On Aug 08, 2014*

Re: . by LaurelP(op): 2:33pm On Aug 08, 2014*

Re: . by Richiy(f): 2:43pm On Aug 08, 2014

You see why you shouldn't date for fun, pity or to manage? One person could become emotionally attached.

Re: . by biggerboyc(m): 3:19pm On Aug 08, 2014

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Bros sey na this section u suppose come or u miss road

2 Likes

Re: . by wikiman(m): 3:22pm On Aug 08, 2014

That why we advice ladies against Sex before marriage...now she bearing the whole emotional baggage....never think you can impress a guy to glue to u with sex....i pity her..wish she had proper counsel before moving into this useless relationship

6 Likes

Re: . by TRADELYN: 3:25pm On Aug 08, 2014

Re: . by Linzo(m): 3:34pm On Aug 08, 2014

op you are jst an heartless creature, how wicked could you be? that you spoil a child at the age of 17, and after seven yrs of having a joyful relationship with her you want to abandon her. For who?. Maybe you might have led her into series of abortions and now she has become a dumping ground for you. If you leave that girl God in heaven and nature will never forgive you. . I rest my case.

1 Like

Re: . by LaurelP(op): 3:37pm On Aug 08, 2014*

Re: . by wikiman(m): 3:38pm On Aug 08, 2014

LaurelP: Who told you we had sex?

where did i mention your name in my post?

2 Likes

Re: . by mployer(m): 3:38pm On Aug 08, 2014

Thrash.
Op I don't believe your story

1 Like

Re: . by LaurelP(op): 3:40pm On Aug 08, 2014*

1 Like

Re: . by LaurelP(op): 3:42pm On Aug 08, 2014

wikiman: where did i mention your name in my post?

Nigerians and their hypocrisy
Always enjoy throwing stones at others

Re: . by Nobody: 3:46pm On Aug 08, 2014

LaurelP: I have this girl whom I've been dating since my Jambite days. That's over 7 yrs ago. This girl loves me a lot, there's no doubt abt it. Infact I'm the one trying make her reduce d love she has for me.

I love her character and she has all I nid in a woman but I just don't love her as a person. Sth tells me I won't value her as much as I really want to value my wife. But she's been on my neck trying to use all sorts of tricks to get me to marry her. I've let her know wisely dat I can't marry her but she keeps crying and and pestering me, and her cry gets to me.

Pls what do I do? Shud I marry her out of pity or insist she let me be? She said she can't live with no other man but me, dat she's gonna harm herself if I live her. Pls serious advice needed, ignore if you don't have nothing to say.

When you say "wisely" how do you mean? Can you marry her out of pity?

Re: . by Nobody: 3:48pm On Aug 08, 2014

LaurelP: is every relationship supposed to lead to marriage?
She's still a young girl of abt 24 so d issue of wasting her time isn't there

...its still long..just imagine all dos opportunities she has missed all because of u

1 Like

Re: . by LaurelP(op): 3:55pm On Aug 08, 2014*

Re: . by naijaboiy: 3:56pm On Aug 08, 2014

Linzo: op you are jst an heartless creature, how wicked could you be? that you spoil a child at the age of 17, and after seven yrs of having a joyful relationship with her you want to abandon her. For who?. Maybe you might have led her into series of abortions and now she has become a dumping ground for you. If you leave that girl God in heaven and nature will never forgive you. . I rest my case.

Jesus christ!!!

People are so dumb

Oga what is the help you have rendered to the Op

You just ended up spewing trash

1 Like

Re: . by LaurelP(op): 3:58pm On Aug 08, 2014*

Re: . by Skmoda360(m): 4:01pm On Aug 08, 2014

wikiman: That why we advice ladies against Sex before marriage...now she bearing the whole emotional baggage....never think you can impress a guy to glue to u with sex....i pity her..wish she had proper counsel before moving into this useless relationship

Well said, I love this

Re: . by laivwire(m): 4:08pm On Aug 08, 2014

Bro, I know your feelings cos I had/ have been in this situation. Seeking for advice led me to a conclusion. First, and very solid, it pays for you to be in a marriage where the girl loves you more. I know yu've been scared all this while to let her go, perhaps cos you feel you would put her through immense emotional trauma and people will see you as wicked. Sorry, unfortunately its too late now.

One thing is, you may not find any other girl that loves you as much as she does. If in a relationship with a girl you love more, you would get to suffer for it cos you will feel she doesn't love you back. This babe loves you and if you think another guy will steal her away, you're on a long thing. Shes stuck on you mehn.

Sadly, its gonna be sooooooo boring when you not with a girl you trip for afresh anytime you see her. You can take another option and 'actively' I mean INTENTIONALLY dump her. (Cos that's the only option she'll give you) hoping you find a better candidate. Then you'll have to do that NOW, like right NOW and face the consequences. Choose which one you want.

P.S; Hope you haven't met her parents or she met yours. OYO oh

1 Like

Re: . by LaurelP(op): 4:14pm On Aug 08, 2014

laivwire: Bro, I know your feelings cos I had/ have been in this situation. Seeking for advice led me to a conclusion. First, and very solid, it pays for you to be in a marriage where the girl loves you more. I know yu've been scared all this while to let her go, perhaps cos you feel you would put her through immense emotional trauma and people will see you as wicked. Sorry, unfortunately its too late now.

One thing is, you may not find any other girl that loves you as much as she does. If in a relationship with a girl you love more, you would get to suffer for it cos you will feel she doesn't love you back. This babe loves you and if you think another guy will steal her away, you're on a long thing. Shes stuck on you mehn.

Sadly, its gonna be sooooooo boring when you not with a girl you trip for afresh anytime you see her. You can take another option and 'actively' I mean INTENTIONALLY dump her. (Cos that's the only option she'll give you) hoping you find a better candidate. Then you'll have to do that NOW, like right NOW and face the consequences. Choose which one you want.

P.S; Hope you haven't met her parents or she met yours. OYO oh

Thanks a bunch. Dat was helpful
No I haven't met her parents

1 Like

Re: . by Nobody: 4:14pm On Aug 08, 2014

LaurelP: is every relationship supposed to lead to marriage?
She's still a young girl of abt 24 so d issue of wasting her time isn't there

7 Years is too long. When a girl wanted to pester me to death after 2 years dating. The first one after 4 Months.

There is nothing you will tell that girl for her to agree to leave you. You have wasted her time.

But how did you keep dating a lady who you didn't love for some long 7 years ? That's being insincere, insensitive, selfish and punny struck...

I quit my relationship once there is no love in less than 6 months..

You may never find a girl who loves you so much again as age progresses. She will likewise find it difficult in her next relationship too.

Well, its life..

Re: . by rawpadgin(m): 4:25pm On Aug 08, 2014

some guys get heart sha shocked

Re: . by LaurelP(op): 4:25pm On Aug 08, 2014

okparaugo: 7 Years is too long. When a girl wanted to pester me to death after 2 years dating. The first one after 4 Months.

There is nothing you will tell that girl for her to agree to leave you. You have wasted her time.

But how did you keep dating a lady who you didn't love for some long 7 years ? That's being insincere, insensitive, selfish and punny struck...

I quit my relationship once there is no love in less than 6 months..

You may never find a girl who loves you so much again as age progresses. She will likewise find it difficult in her next relationship too.

Well, its life..

Pls read my post and comments again
And u didn't give any advice

Re: . by rawpadgin(m): 4:27pm On Aug 08, 2014

some guy get heart sha :osome guy get heart sha

Re: . by jnrbayano(m): 4:28pm On Aug 08, 2014

You can't marry out of pity/sympathy, otherwise your marriage will have breaking up written all over it.

I don't know what you guys have discussed all through those seven years that made her firm on having you for a lifetime. For you to have had a proper calculation of those years (saying is seven years) what you people had was a proper relationship that had a direction, but that direction, I can't say.

1. It's your job now to try and make her see reasons with you. How you do that and the accuracy is all down to you. But I would say that you must be patient with it and never say a single harsh word to her, even if she is recalcitrant.

2. Before you try No 1, I want to remind you that grass is not always greener on the other side. Why not try and see if you can love her enough to wanna keep her? These days, it's hard to find someone who will love you half of how that girl loves you.

3. Most importantly, why didn't you seek advice in the early days? Why now??

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Re: . by Nobody: 4:39pm On Aug 08, 2014

LaurelP: Pls read my post and comments again
And u didn't give any advice

You phuck up sir.

Dump her.

Breathe fresh air..

Re: . by BluePearls(m): 4:40pm On Aug 08, 2014

7 years is a long time man. Why hang on for that long if you didn't love to begin with? Think of it man, you could be missing out on the best girl for you. I bet there's something about her you got attracted to initially, why not build on it and learn to love her personality and not her physical attributes. Good girls are hard to find man, imagine you have a girl who's ready to be with you and stay faithful (something a whole lotta guys are praying for) and you think 7 long years is not enough to convince you? No one is perfect bro, she may not be the best, but she's all you've got for now... think am well before you decide.

1 Like

Re: . by Nobody: 4:40pm On Aug 08, 2014

LaurelP: I believe there's a level of feelings u shud have for someone b4 going into marriage wit dem
I understand d essence and importance of marriage so I don't joke with it
I like sticking with a particular person in order to really "know her"
She started pushing for marriage, but I don't have enuf feelings for her to marry her
I wudnt want to abuse her emotionally in marriage

How did you tell her.??

As far as i am concerned its better to let her go NOW if you've been together for seven years and you could not forge enough bond to keep you there, free yourselves. It will be hard on her since its not mutual but you are doing both yourselves a big favor.

I keep asking how did you tell her because you may be giving her mixed messages,maybe whenever she comes around you still cuddle and have sex with her,she calls and you tell her miss you too or you refuse to pick her calls,dodge her visits and avoid her instead of sitting her down,talking to her,telling her the truth. I know how hard it is telling someone this kind of truth. But if you continue with this mixed messages she will think maybe you are confused,maybe its your family,maybe its a new gal but you will soon get over her. She will think she can win you back.

After all this time as hard as it is you owe her the TRUTH so she can heal quickly and you know its this truth you've been avoiding all this while.

1 2 Reply

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