Hello NLs
I always have the intention not to physically beat my children when they misbehave (that I would rather talk to them or give them light punishment) due to the fact that my parents were people that believe so much that beating is the best method to correct a child but they were wrong because we only changed as far as the pain of the beating lasted, Infact it made us worse because we got so used to cane that we not scared of doing something wrong, so because of that, I believed that beating does more harm than good,
and to support my new believe is when one of my uncle told me that he has never beat his children, though they(his children) left Nigeria at an early age, but even when in Nigeria he said he has never beaten them, though can't ascertain if his wife did not, but am sure when they got abroad they won't beat, because they don't beat dia.
But recently I have a niece of mine that came to stay with us and with my knowledge that beating is not the best method of correcting a child, I try as much as possible not to beat her when she did something wrong, but lately have had to beat her twice because it seems she wasn't getting better or listening to the corrections when I say them but with a few strokes she got them perfectly, and am like, me that determined to never beat a child, but can't refrain myself from beating my niece, how sure that I won't beat my child
with all this
I just keep wondering
is It possible to raise a child In Nigeria without beating the child?

bamoza: Hello NLs
I always have the intention not to physically beat my children when they misbehave (that I would rather talk to them or give them light punishment) due to the fact that my parents were people that believe so much that beating is the best method to correct a child but they were wrong because we only changed as far as the pain of the beating lasted, Infact it made us worse because we got so used to cane that we not scared of doing something wrong, so because of that, I believed that beating does more harm than good,
and to support my new believe is when one of my uncle told me that he has never beat his children, though they(his children) left Nigeria at an early age, but even when in Nigeria he said he has never beaten them, though can't ascertain if his wife did not, but am sure when they got abroad they won't beat, because they don't beat dia.
But recently I have a niece of mine that came to stay with us and with my knowledge that beating is not the best method of correcting a child, I try as much as possible not to beat her when she did something wrong, but lately have had to beat her twice because it seems she wasn't getting better or listening to the corrections when I say them but with a few strokes she got them perfectly, and am like, me that determined to never beat a child, but can't refrain myself from beating my niece, how sure that I won't beat my child
with all this
I just keep wondering
is It possible to raise a child In Nigeria without beating the child?

I do not support the idea of no beating. Once in a while, there is a need for some spanking to drive home the point you have been passing across through talking and admonishing which the child is not understanding.

training a child without beating WHEN NECESSARY i like thinking you can drive a car so carefully without wearing out the brake pad. i don't know where we got this idea of only talking to the child from.

the balance i believe is that you should not beat irrationally especially at the moment of anger. also let the child know why he is being beaten.

lastly, i know that there are a lot of contrary opinions, but the question we should ask is :in societies where the do not their their children, are they turning out to be more responsible adults that we are?

Absolutely yes!
And pls don't qoute d bible for me.

We can see d effect of beating all over us.

Spanking is good,where necessary,don't leave a bruise.

The heart of a child is strong,only cane soften it.

Am a living example,if not mum's use of cane,I would have gone bad,the thought of the cane always put a strain on my activities at times.

It is not possible 2 raise a well behaved child without beating,but I think too much of beating makes dem worse,dey get used 2 it and no longer scared of beating,teaching dem body languages is very important,hubby started spanking our son at a very tender age nw he understands his body languages he doesn't go near visitor with drinks ordinary eye rolling is enof to correct him.

If a child won't listen.... I ll spank.

its very possible to raise a child without beatings.

i have lots of friends, who swear they ve never been beaten and today they are perfectly behaved.

i was beaten as a child mainly in school and am not better behaved than any of them,

there are also boys i know, that were beaten mercilessly in those days, canned till their backs were raw.

especially one called pule. but that hasnt done him any good.

last i heard he was working in a motor park as a loader, and fights at the slightest opportunity.

bamoza: Hello NLs
I always have the intention not to physically beat my children when they misbehave (that I would rather talk to them or give them light punishment) due to the fact that my parents were people that believe so much that beating is the best method to correct a child but they were wrong because we only changed as far as the pain of the beating lasted, Infact it made us worse because we got so used to cane that we not scared of doing something wrong, so because of that, I believed that beating does more harm than good,
and to support my new believe is when one of my uncle told me that he has never beat his children, though they(his children) left Nigeria at an early age, but even when in Nigeria he said he has never beaten them, though can't ascertain if his wife did not, but am sure when they got abroad they won't beat, because they don't beat dia.
But recently I have a niece of mine that came to stay with us and with my knowledge that beating is not the best method of correcting a child, I try as much as possible not to beat her when she did something wrong, but lately have had to beat her twice because it seems she wasn't getting better or listening to the corrections when I say them but with a few strokes she got them perfectly, and am like, me that determined to never beat a child, but can't refrain myself from beating my niece, how sure that I won't beat my child
with all this
I just keep wondering
is It possible to raise a child In Nigeria without beating the child?

I have 2 kids, my son is almost 6 and my daughter is 3 and I dont beat them.

My children are not drums. I usually talk them thru it.

Occasionally I spank their bums but then they have committed grave sin.

I think naughty corner or locking them in the room serves as a better punishment than beating.

I'm not a violent person by the way, I don't like fighting and I can't kuku fight sef

teeboo: It is not possible 2 raise a well behaved child without beating,but I think too much of beating makes dem worse,dey get used 2 it and no longer scared of beating,teaching dem body languages is very important,hubby started spanking our son at a very tender age nw he understands his body languages he doesn't go near visitor with drinks ordinary eye rolling is enof to correct him.

I disagree. I was not beaten as a child. My mum spanked me a few times, nothing serious. I father spanked my bum once and I must say I turned out well. Beating just makes the child hard. I dont beat my own Stern look or threat of naughty corner is enough. My sisters son on the other hand who gets beaten well does not hear o! Stern look o, beating o, no one moves him. But he cried the day I locked him in the room and he heard other children playing and laughing. That taught him a big lesson and he started to behave.

At the bolded... But u beat them

Daresh:

I have 2 kids, my son is almost 6 and my daughter is 3 and I dont beat them.

My children are not drums. I usually talk them thru it.

Occasionally I spank their bums but then they have committed grave sin.

I think naughty corner or locking them in the room serves as a better punishment than beating.

I'm not a violent person by the way, I don't like fighting and I can't kuku fight sef

#DONOTBEAT

Daresh:

I have 2 kids, my son is almost 6 and my daughter is 3 and I dont beat them.

My children are not drums. I usually talk them thru it.

Occasionally I spank their bums but then they have committed grave sin.

I think naughty corner or locking them in the room serves as a better punishment than beating.

I'm not a violent person by the way, I don't like fighting and I can't kuku fight sef

I think what I said is same as what u just said,cos if occasionally u spank their bums den dats beating too,we've different types of beating I never said beating like a goat,like I said too much of it makes dem worse .Another thing is child differs, some children are well behaved naturally even without scolding dem dey knws wot is wright

Beating becomes a necessity when a child is unruly or unrepentantly sturbon. Nothing wrong with it

I told myself same thing and it's becoming increasingly more difficult to abide by with my 21month old son.
He runs the water dispenser almost everyday completely running it out on the kitchen floor at least once
He goes to his clothes drawer to empty the neatly ironed and folded clothes.
He empties his laundry basket too;at least twice a day
This is minus going to turn off/on wall sockets as soon as no one is around.
He's also pulled a standing wall mirror on himself crashing it in the process and slightly bruising himself.
I have introduced spanking on the bum to caution him
Have I also mentioned he's a pro in climbing any and all things?chairs,dinning tables,centre table,climbs into his own high chair amongst many others?
He needs to be cautioned before he endNgers himself unknowinhlu

aolatunde00: I told myself same thing and it's becoming increasingly more difficult to abide by with my 21month old son.
He runs the water dispenser almost everyday completely running it out on the kitchen floor at least once
He goes to his clothes drawer to empty the neatly ironed and folded clothes.
He empties his laundry basket too;at least twice a day
This is minus going to turn off/on wall sockets as soon as no one is around.
He's also pulled a standing wall mirror on himself crashing it in the process and slightly bruising himself.
I have introduced spanking on the bum to caution him
Have I also mentioned he's a pro in climbing any and all things?chairs,dinning tables,centre table,climbs into his own high chair amongst many others?
He needs to be cautioned before he endNgers himself unknowinhlu

Only God knws if dey derive pleasure in making d house look untidy,am experiencing d same thing,my 15months old son can climb anything he nearly fell frm dinning table som days back thank God I was around,he'll empty his box of cloth on d floor,2 them dey're just having fun

teeboo:

Only God knws if dey derive pleasure in making d house look untidy,am experiencing d same thing,my 15months old son can climb anything he nearly fell frm dinning table som days back thank God I was around,he'll empty his box of cloth on d floor,2 them dey're just having fun

Me too I wonder oh, maybe we will need a child psychologist to come explain how a child thinks and reasons

^^^yall did same.the eager curiousity of children wanting to fill up their empty minds.children with such untiring energy for mischief and distruction are usually intelligent am told.

I think one just need to learn to be able to set the boundary between when to beat and when to stop
I remember when my dad would naked us just to flog us, because normal method of flogging no dey enter us again....

if a child is 5 years and above, I believe he is above beating, maybe punishment would do

but not beating and funny enough my parents best scripture for dia defense is dt "spare the rod and spoil the child"

It depends on the child,if my dad hadn't beaten me I would av being a thief, everytin excess isn't good. Sometime over pamper can do more harm dat beating, imagine if I was caught outside.

for some reasons best known to him, dad never raised a hand on me and my siblings, mumsy gave us a a taste of her cane once in a while. .

Yes you can def raise a well behaved child without spanking

. . but as a parent be sure to understand the type of child that you have before deceiding the best way to discipline.

Personally I am against spanking and it should only be as a last resort after other options have been tried and failed and that is the only option suitable for that child. Each child is unique and what may work for child A may not work for Child B

I try my best not to spank them but there are times when you are left with no choice. I also use the naughty corner which they detest a lot because my own naughy corner is our visitor's toilet. Just the mention of it gets them to behave but all in all I keep praying for wisdom from God to be able to teach them in the best way possible as I have four kids aged 0 to 7

I believe it's possible not to beat a child if you do not want to,my kids are very hyperactive and they do the naughtiest of things. ...all I do is apply patience and wisdom,many parents do not have the patience to deal with kids especially kids that are ages 18 months to about 8 years...I spanked my 4year old daughter in the presence of my mum one time,and my mum was so upset,nothing wey she no talk that day. ...that I was worse than my kids at stressing her and so I shouldn't beat my kids again,she then took her time to tell me the things I did as a child. ...it was so funny, so I decided that my kids were just being what they are,children. So I'd rather discipline and mete out what I deem to be punishment,like for my almost 5year old daughter, anytime she gets naughty,I make her count 1-200,if she makes mistakes, she'll start again, and it has helped me and her too.....or I tell her to lie down and sleep,na by force sleep o,she hates siestas...once I say,lie down,she'll just say mummy,sorry, I won't do it again

Not possible. At some points in their promising life, they need beating. #honestly

Well, from experience I think we cannot do without some little spanking.

I JUST ASKED MY DAD AND AFTER TWO SLAPS, HE SAID NO.

'Spare the rod and spoil the child'. That should be enough.

In the west, kids are generally not beaten,yet they grow up to be responsible and well behaved citizens for the most part; can't say the same for Nigeria with our holier than thou attitudes on raising kids. My siblings and I were not flogged and we turned out ok, it's entirely possible dude.

#TEAM WHERE IS MY KOBOKO

In my state of origin according to my Nigerian passport, it is practically "IMPOSSIBLE" because that child's gonna grow up to very Disrespectful and Rude.