chibwike:
Ha...why will you say such thing, me that has been missing you....have been busy of late.lets not derail..i'd mention you in jbluv's bar later , when i get home....so we'd talk.

ok sweetie. Missed ya too. Get home safely.

Before u take ur decision
Just weigh the prons and cons of ur actions


U can check the web pages for more detail information on what u are trying to do











It's better to be informed that ignorantly walking to the marriage institution without proper knowledge of what u are entering to


I won't advice u to go ahead or dissolve the relationship but when u are better informed.. . U must decide to use ur head and not ur heart to make the best decisions

kpeteman:
sickle cell is not a disease you IDIOT

FÜCK!! FÜCKING sure?

@op.... Why tempt Fate?

Walelavender:
Its quite funny that most Singles date or go into relationships without knowing eachother's genotype (for marriage bound ones). I have people around me like that and I can't just fathom why they should go into long relationship and discovering at the tale end they ain't compatible in this generation! For the OP @ crossroad, there is no better way than to back out while you sacrifice your emotion ( for a while). You will definitely get another 'Love of your life'.....look before you leap!

so we should be asking for genotype along with fone number abi what is this gibberish u are spewing,or what if u dont like all the aa ppl u meet

mikolo80:
so we should be asking for genotype along with fone number abi what is this gibberish u are spewing,or what if u dont like all the aa ppl u meet

It's very laughable that you are taking it 'personal', however, if you are caught in the web, you better do the needful. Who talked about asking the genotype in your first date,does that sound logical? If you are in an emotion driven relationship, you are in a soup because where you need to use your HEAD you will use your HEART. Continue to fall in love with Carriers while you are also a Carrier ooo.

Wisdom Is Profitable To Direct!

You sound a Believer. However, from previous stories, I would suggest you see your Spiritual Guide over you or a Mentor.

You know this CROSS ROAD is of utmost importance and you need DIVINE DIRECTION ONLY...

Say ye to the righteous, it shall be well with him...
He setteth the solitary in families..

it is well, Queen.

it is called genotype not "bloodtype"

Walelavender:

It's very laughable that you are taking it 'personal', however, if you are caught in the web, you better do the needful. Who talked about asking the genotype in your first date,does that sound logical? If you are in an emotion driven relationship, you are in a soup because where you need to use your HEAD you will use your HEART. Continue to fall in love with Carriers while you are also a Carrier ooo.

o its personal. You dontget to choose who you fall in love with pal

Y isn't this on front page?

Jennima, PLS DON'T TRY IT. Being a sickler ain't fun, the pain is indescribable. Surely, if you put the health of ur future kids as a priority, you wouldn't do that. My dear, God will give u a better guy...PLS DON'T TRY IT.

I don't believe love can be selfish, even at those times where it benefits us in one way or the other. The fundamental principles of love revolves around doing good deeds that are selfless in nature.

If both of you choose to demonstrate your love to each other without considering the product of that love (likely kids) then that love, in my opinion, is incomplete. The children that may come should also be considered.

I am not asking you to leave him but I am asking that you put your future kids into consideration before making a decision you may end up regretting.

I have this friend who got married last year. He met this wonderful lady 4 years ago and both of them seemed like the perfect couple.

Sadly, both of them are 'AS' and ran the risk of making life miserable for one or more of their children. They broke up as soon as they found out, though it was a tough choice.

Today he is happily married to someone else and now he and this lady seem to be the perfect couple.

It is never easy to leave a loved one but some times it is necessary, especially when it is for a good cause. Weigh your options and make your decision.

Please leave out any decision that involves killing your child. It is not worth it.

See this girl oo. Do the resultin genotypes know anytin 'bout love. Smh, all these kids of now a days.
Is it actually the more you know, the less you undestand?

Miscellaneous mind

Thank God am AA,any girl I fit marry...

If you need a virgin wife come to Nairaland,more than half on nairaland girls are Virgin

If what u r saying is true, I mean abt abstaining from sex, then you must be a rear gem. May d Lord bless u for that

Too risky.... Jus think very well

@Op...lemme get this straight, you guy will determined the genotype of the baby before he is born for what? Abortion?

You risked not having sex with your Exes only to arrive safely at having abortion? And you think you are in love? Isn't that sweet?

Come listen ..dump that guy like its hot, you will get over him before this time next year, dont be selfish here, you have to remember your kids now any decision you take now will affect them....
.Nobody ever died of heartbreak..

You are cute, You can get any dude you want

Jennimma:
I'm a 24 year old lady who just finished my NYSC. I've read so many articles on pre-marital sex. I made a promise to God to keep myself till marriage. I lost so many relationships because I didn't succumb to their wish. This continued until I met this loving and caring guy whom i've dated for four years and he has never asked for sex. The problem now is that we are both type AS genotype and medically not fit to marry. We love each other so much and he has promised not to leave. Instead he suggested we get married and determine the genotype of our unborn babies before they're born. Should I leave him? Or go with his suggestion?

Better start running now faster than speed train


Present love and affection between you will lead u no where


You must regret later and shed unnecessary tear


Forget any of his solution

Jennimma:
I'm a 24 year old lady who just finished my NYSC. I've read so many articles on pre-marital sex. I made a promise to God to keep myself till marriage. I lost so many relationships because I didn't succumb to their wish. This continued until I met this loving and caring guy whom i've dated for four years and he has never asked for sex. The problem now is that we are both type AS genotype and medically not fit to marry. We love each other so much and he has promised not to leave. Instead he suggested we get married and determine the genotype of our unborn babies before they're born. Should I leave him? Or go with his suggestion?

.

My dear, it would depend on your economic circusmtances.

I know excellent doctors here in UK who can help you.

It is through pre-implantation genetic diagnosis (PGD). Sickle cell is one of those things that can be tested for.

AS AN EMBRYO. OUTSIDE YOUR WOMB. THAT IS BEFORE IMPLANTATION IN THE WOMB.

The eggs are fertilised using Assisted Reproductive Technology (ART) like IVF.
Up to 2 resulting embryos that test negative for HbSS/HbSC in your case, on day 6 after fertilisation, will be implanted.

If the two embryos implant and result in two healthy babies, you may be done with having kids. Up to you.


So you're not aborting any babies.

At that stage, lots of unviable embryos are naturally lost anyway, and woman never gets to know that there was ever such an embryo.

But it's fairly expensive. At your age and otherwise healthy, your chances of success are decent, maybe 35% chance per cycle, perhaps more.
If you cannot afford ART and you're against abortion too, my dear I won't advice you to have babies based on lottery.

The suffering I have seen SS kids go through, even with excellent healthcare provision, is heartbreaking.

dimkpaeze fflw this thread, this is exactly what i was telling u about.

@OP, pls u have gotten a lot of reasonable suggestions here.my cousin was in the same situation and had to end the relationship with his gf who he had dated for years and they loved each other so much it was heartbrking. Pls next time when u get into a relationship with someone before it gets serious find out if the person is AS, that is a burden all sickle cell carriers have to bear. I'm AS and i dont want to play with my hrt lailai so before it gets serious i have to know if u are a carrier (AS,SS) or not (AA).

pcguru1:
@OP am in the same dilemma as you, truth be told, its going to be much pain, I have close friend who are SS some died and the ones alive disapprove of my relationship, also a friend of mine his sister died as a result of heart attack or something, cuz she watched 2 of her SS kids die. Though we dated without knowing the genotype and truthfully since that time the relationships has been getting awkward am sure she's gradually realizing it's not possible. My advise pls don't, am not one used to losing people let alone harboring that fear everytime your wife Is pregnant as for abortion that's a no-no for me, might not be a saint but taking a life has grave consequences. All the best dear and sorry this will hurt like someone said but it's nothing compared to watching your kids suffer.

UPDATE: Sadly we broke up..avoid AS-AS relationships its not worth the pain at the end..

[quote author=Jennimma post=27116697]sweedy,am also having same issue...and the problem about this is that the risk of having ss is more than the risk of having aa/as.although it is quite possible...even in my own family,my mom is as and pupsie is aa...it doesn't stop all three of us frm having as,just one of us is aa....
Based on that,I ve decided to forfeit the relationship,though the guy says he won't leave..I can't risk abortion faa...
But if you can,you can go on with the relationship pending the risk and pray to God for guidiance... >

For the sake of your future children, perhaps you should make that sacrifice. Even after getting married you can never be sure that the man will still be there or if he will be as responsible as when you both started. Besides, taking care of children is not easy, talkless of if the kids end up having to suffer with weak blood types.

Jennimma:
I'm a 24 year old lady who just finished my NYSC. I've read so many articles on pre-marital sex. I made a promise to God to keep myself till marriage. I lost so many relationships because I didn't succumb to their wish. This continued until I met this loving and caring guy whom i've dated for four years and he has never asked for sex. The problem now is that we are both type AS genotype and medically not fit to marry. We love each other so much and he has promised not to leave. Instead he suggested we get married and determine the genotype of our unborn babies before they're born. Should I leave him? Or go with his suggestion?

At least you guys found out the problem on time before anything.

Quit asking for solution from nairalanders,you are educated enough to know the consequences of having a child with sickle cell anemia.

But if you feel love is blind,you can go ahead with the marriage... But be prepared to spend all the monies your man would be making on hospital bills #Don'tSufferInTheFuture

In saint Valentine's voice...."L๏Vє Iş ßLIЙđ"

My đєąr ม rIşK ђąVIЙ ąЙ AA, AS, and SS child.....

มr LมV LYF MIGђ┼ єЙđ มP ßєIЙG ą ßąđ LIFє F๏r มr SS child.... MąKIЙG đ cђiLđ şมFFєr ą LIFє┼IMє ๏F şIcKЙєşş...

đą┼ş ЩђY MєđIcąLLY I┼ş Й๏┼ ąđVIşєđ ┼๏ đIVє IЙ┼๏ ą rєLą┼I๏ЙşђIP LYK đą┼....

MY ąđVIcє: I KЙ๏Щ I┼'ş ђąrđ ßมђ ┼rY Lє┼┼IЙG đ GมY G๏ ş๏ ąş Й๏┼ ┼๏ şมFFєr IЙ đ Fม┼มrє...

.....┼๏M๏rr๏Щ ЙєVєr đIєş, ม'L ş┼ILL FIЙđ đ PєrFєc┼ MąЙ.....