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Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? - Romance - Nairaland

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Are You More Often The "Dumper" Or The "Dumpee" In Relationships? / Non- Nigerian Women What Do You Really Think Of Nigerian Men / What Did You Really Miss About Your EX? (2) (3) (4)

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Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Eberex(m): 8:00am On Oct 20, 2014
OK, I've seen questions asking would you rather be the Dumper or the Dumpee, and stuff like that, but do you really think it matters who is the dumper and who is the dumpee?

Take a guy for example. He claims he is the one that dumped her, because she cheated on him for months (he figured 3 months before he dumped her). He says it matters but to me it doesn't matter because it seemed SHE was the one that dumped him already since she moved on to sleep with other guys. SO who dumped who? and does it matter?

There is this thing about not wanting to be the one coming back to beg, hence people like to be the dumper, even if they are wrong in most cases.

What's your take? Are you afraid to dump him/her even when deep down you love him/her so much and hope he or she would come back to beg. What if that doesn't happen? Will you tell him/her to come back and forget about what happened?
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by MizMyColi(f): 8:07am On Oct 20, 2014
Between both parties?
Oh well, I think what matters more's whose ego is bruised.

At the risk of sounding sexist, I think it's harder for a Guy who's dumped by a lady or a lady-like.

It tells more on the lady though - that's if roles were reversed.
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Eberex(m): 8:21am On Oct 20, 2014
MizMyColi:
Between both parties?
Oh well, I think what matters more's whose ego is bruised.

At the risk of sounding sexist, I think it's harder for a Guy who's dumped by a lady or a lady-like.

It tells more on the lady though - that's if roles were reversed.

But who really loses more between the two? satisfying her material needs or satisfying his sexual needs?
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by MizMyColi(f): 9:07am On Oct 20, 2014
Eberex:


But who really loses more between the two? satisfying her material needs or satisfying his sexual needs?

lolest.
As far as I'm concerned, those two you mentioned up there are highly inconsequential to me ATM.
Maybe they'll begin to matter when I get married.

There are attributes that I look out for in a guy......money material needs and sex aren't on my top 3 list.

Surely there's more to life than those, imo.
wink
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Tallesty1(m): 9:12am On Oct 20, 2014
MizMyColi:


lolest.
As far as I'm concerned, those two you mentioned up there are highly inconsequential to me ATM.
Maybe they'll begin to matter when I get married.

There are attributes that I look out for in a guy......money material needs and sex aren't on my top 3 list.

Surely there's more to life than those, imo.
wink
What are your top 3?
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by MizMyColi(f): 9:28am On Oct 20, 2014
Tallesty1:
What are your top 3?

1. A man that loves like a child, yet thinks like a man....Talk of loving sacrificially, com-promisingly, ferociously shocked grin cheesy

2. Deeply Embedded Values (He should be an embodiment of) - Integrity, Thoughtfulness, Sensitivity, Honesty, Spirituality, Leadership, Confidence, Happiness, cool, calm, collected......ati gbo gbo ti gbo - in those lines of course grin

3. lipsrsealed

4. His second name ought to be Mr. Romanus Romantic. I'd like for my man to affirm me fala fala.

5. You know na.... *double winks* grin grin every every cheesy


Hiohiohiohiohiohiohiohiohio

kikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikik

cool
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Tallesty1(m): 9:39am On Oct 20, 2014
MizMyColi:


1. A man that loves like a child, yet thinks like a man....Talk of loving sacrificially, com-promisingly, ferociously shocked grin cheesy

2. Deeply Embedded Values (He should be an embodiment of) - Integrity, Thoughtfulness, Sensitivity, Honesty, Spirituality, Leadership, Confidence, Happiness, cool, calm, collected......ati gbo gbo ti gbo - in those lines of course grin

3. lipsrsealed

4. His second name ought to be Mr. Romanus Romantic. I'd like for my man to affirm me fala fala.

5. You know na.... *double winks* grin grin every every cheesy


Hiohiohiohiohiohiohiohiohio

kikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikikik

cool
Falls down from an Helicopter.

Kills three birds and one kite mid-air

Lands on a mango tree.

Knocks down three branches.

Lands finally on a railroad.

Oncoming train crushes him to pieces.

Now he is standing at the pearly gate.
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by MizMyColi(f): 9:51am On Oct 20, 2014
Tallesty1:
Falls down from an Helicopter.

Kills three birds and one kite mid-air

Lands on a mango tree.

Knocks down three branches.

Lands finally on a railroad.

Oncoming train crushes him to pieces.

Now he is standing at the pearly gate.

*quickly sends angels to welcome him*
*On seeing him, I rush out to embrace him*

Oh, Tallesty!!!!
Long time!

How have you been?
Good to have you here with us.

You're free to dream now cheesy
For all your dreams and wishes shall be fulfilled henceforth.

cheesy

grin grin
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Nobody: 9:54am On Oct 20, 2014
i don't just like to be dumped.
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Tallesty1(m): 10:06am On Oct 20, 2014
MizMyColi:


*quickly sends angels to welcome him*
*On seeing him, I rush out to embrace him*

Oh, Tallesty!!!!
Long time!

How have you been?
Good to have you here with us.

You're free to dream now cheesy
For all your dreams and wishes shall be fulfilled henceforth.

cheesy

grin grin
Y'know I wanted to say "Impossible" but then I remembered my dad.

I can say he is got all except no4(Or maybe he was romantic when they were young, I can't say) and I'm sure he is not the last of his kind.

And by the power in me and the authority from the words God in books of Job 22:28 which says that I shall decree a thing and it shall be established, I command you to speak N03.


gringringringrin
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Eberex(m): 10:06am On Oct 20, 2014
well i think dumping is only taken serious if the two are very much into each other, apart from that, either of them can walk away without blinking.
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by MizMyColi(f): 10:19am On Oct 20, 2014
Tallesty1:
Y'know I wanted to say "Impossible" but then I remembered my dad.

I can say he is got all except no4(Or maybe he was romantic when they were young, I can't say) and I'm sure he is not the last of his kind.

And by the power in me and the authority from the words God in books of Job 22:28 which says that I shall decree a thing and it shall be established, I command you to speak N03.


gringringringrin

Yeah, my Dad too.
My Dad.

He's got all four and I can categorically tell you that their marriage is not "Perfect"
But they're happy, very happy.

When she and her friends have their normal gists about what their husband does right or not and other things.
and my Mom tries to complain that Dad always nags at her when she doesn't pick his call on time or doesn't pick at all
I've seen those women tell my Mom to shut up, that she has a perfect husband, that they wish theirs were like him.



Well one thing though.......
Men like that don't fall from trees, they are RARE

While I believe in miracles and God's grace.
A lady has to earn that kind of man.

In other words, if you desire that kind of man, then you can trust God to work in you to bring about certain personality changes in you to attract your kind of person and VICE VERSA

As for number 3
That one's btw me and the gods.
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Eastherbunny(m): 10:23am On Oct 20, 2014
Came into thread saw only three people......hissses so the Andyblaze syndrome has spread to This level walks out
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Tymax(m): 10:28am On Oct 20, 2014
When you get dumped, you'll know angry



MizMyColi you have come with your endless epistles angry
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by MizMyColi(f): 10:40am On Oct 20, 2014
Tymax:
When you get dumped, you'll know angry



MizMyColi you have come with your endless epistles angry


shocked

undecided undecided

angry angry Hi, Goodmorning, hope you had a cool weekend? undecided undecided
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Rival(m): 10:41am On Oct 20, 2014
Eberex:
OK, I've seen questions asking would you rather be the Dumper or the Dumpee, and stuff like that, but do you really think it matters who is the dumper and who is the dumpee?

It does matter who dumps and who's dumped! It's better you take a walk when you feel you can't take it anymore than hanging around to be told to your face you're no longer wanted despite being ill-treated. You walk away with dignity!

Eberex:
Take a guy for example. He claims he is the one that dumped her, because she cheated on him for months (he figured 3 months before he dumped her). He says it matters but to me it doesn't matter because it seemed SHE was the one that dumped him already since she moved on to sleep with other guys. SO who dumped who? and does it matter?

Every cheating does not imply that you don't want your partner anymore! One can cheat for many reasons without necesarily wanting to dump one's partner. So if the guy felt he couldn't stand his girl cheating on him and decided to walk away, then he did the dumping! Even if she had the intention of dumping him, he beat her to it and left with his dignity intact which could make her respect him if they would see sometime later on!

Eberex:
There is this thing about not wanting to be the one coming back to beg, hence people like to be the dumper, even if they are wrong in most cases.

What's your take? Are you afraid to dump him/her even when deep down you love him/her so much and hope he or she would come back to beg. What if that doesn't happen? Will you tell him/her to come back and forget about what happened?

Love is built and conditional so if the conditions that inspired the love are no longer there or if you've been treated in a manner that you think is beyond the bounds of acceptability, then walk away!

Personally, I'm not afraid to walk away and when I do so, I must have thought about it carefully and convinced myself that there's no going back!

1 Like

Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Tymax(m): 10:46am On Oct 20, 2014
MizMyColi:



shocked

undecided undecided

angry angry Hi, Goodmorning, hope you had a cool weekend? undecided undecided
Good morning angry
Yeah, my weekend was great. How was yours undecided
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by MizMyColi(f): 10:50am On Oct 20, 2014
Tymax:

Good morning angry
Yeah, my weekend was great. How was yours undecided

T'was fine thanks.
sad
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by chimerase2: 10:59am On Oct 20, 2014
I prefer being dumped
Cus I no want mak person nakkked swear for me embarassed
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by chigoizie7(m): 11:12am On Oct 20, 2014
does it really matter who got dumped? when its not working out,u take a walk, actually, i would prefer to be dumped, i once volunteered for that position. u dump me? i dumped u? wats d diff? we aint together no more. life goes on, i wonder why people re sentimental about certain frivolities.
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Nobody: 11:19am On Oct 20, 2014
chimerase2:
I prefer being dumped
Cus I no want mak person nakkked swear for me embarassed
Lol...
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Eastherbunny(m): 1:07pm On Oct 20, 2014
Mature people go into relationship so if there is there is differences along the line the path ways.
I don't see why people call it Dumping.
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Eberex(m): 1:08pm On Oct 20, 2014
Eastherbunny:

Mature people go into relationship so if there is there is differences along the line the path ways.
I don't see why people call it Dumping.

Kindly give it a name then undecided
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Eastherbunny(m): 1:14pm On Oct 20, 2014
Eberex:


Kindly give it a name then undecided

I just call it seceding or emancipation cuz saying dumping look as if the relationship force to happen.
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by ugwum007(m): 1:21pm On Oct 20, 2014
when u get dumped u will know...
but how can a girl that her garden of eden have been ravaged countless times say that she dumped him, u didn't collect enough dough to build even a hut for urself, money u no get, husband u no get....who dumped who?
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Tallesty1(m): 4:29pm On Oct 20, 2014
MizMyColi:


Yeah, my Dad too.
My Dad.

He's got all four and I can categorically tell you that their marriage is not "Perfect"
But they're happy, very happy.

When she and her friends have their normal gists about what their husband does right or not and other things.
and my Mom tries to complain that Dad always nags at her when she doesn't pick his call on time or doesn't pick at all
I've seen those women tell my Mom to shut up, that she has a perfect husband, that they wish theirs were like him.



Well one thing though.......
Men like that don't fall from trees, they are RARE

While I believe in miracles and God's grace.
A lady has to earn that kind of man.

In other words, if you desire that kind of man, then you can trust God to work in you to bring about certain personality changes in you to attract your kind of person and VICE VERSA

As for number 3
That one's btw me and the gods.
John 10:34 Jesus answered them, Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are gods?

Psalm 82:6 "I said, 'You are"gods" you are all sons of the Most High.'cheesycheesycheesy


Oya tell me now cause ayam one of themwink
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by MizMyColi(f): 4:50pm On Oct 20, 2014
Tallesty1:
John 10:34 Jesus answered them, Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are gods?

Psalm 82:6 "I said, 'You are"gods" you are all sons of the Most High.'cheesycheesycheesy


Oya tell me now cause ayam one of themwink

Honestly, no 3's for the exact kind of personalities I'd wanna settle with.
Those my personality type ishes, remember?

Overtime, I've found certain groups of people that I fare better with, than others.
Das all o
grin grin
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Nobody: 5:16pm On Oct 20, 2014
ideally,the dumper is the one that got hurt,or fell out of love first
i never hav d galls to ditch a guy,once there is a strain in communication,d message is driven,he never literally says the words.
btw,i wuld rather be d dumper tho*smtin abt self pride*
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Tallesty1(m): 5:54pm On Oct 20, 2014
MizMyColi:


Honestly, no 3's for the exact kind of personalities I'd wanna settle with.
Those my personality type ishes, remember?

Overtime, I've found certain groups of people that I fare better with, than others.
Das all o
grin grin
Well............

But you know............

When you meet the right person.

There will be some changes from both sides.

Otherwise it would be difficult to fit in.

So Your "ishes" may not matter then.
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by MizMyColi(f): 6:09pm On Oct 20, 2014
Tallesty1:
Well............

But you know............

When you meet the right person.

There will be some changes from both sides.

Otherwise it would be difficult to fit in.

So Your "ishes" may not matter then.

you're right my dear.

But I can keep hoping until then, right?

grin grin
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by Aitee1: 6:15pm On Oct 20, 2014
See topic..."dumper and dumpee"

cheesy cheesy cheesy
Re: Do You Really Think It Matters Who Is The Dumper And Dumpee? by LogoDWhiz(m): 7:42pm On Oct 20, 2014
Well, I think it matters when one partner feels cheated. When he/she has given or sacrificed a lot or more than the other partner.

Or when the break-up isn't mutual.

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