So you’re with a guy who loves kids and says he wants them? Obviously, those are good places to start. But what about the slightly subtler signals that he’s up to the parenting challenge? We break them down:
1. He’s Intuitive
If you’ve ever heard the phrase, “You look tired—can I make you dinner/give you a massage/do the laundry?” come out of his mouth, that’s a sign he’s attentive and takes initiative, which are biggies when it comes to kids. “Children need attention constantly,” says Jane Greer, Ph.D., New York-based relationship expert and author of What About Me? Stop Selfishness From Ruining Your Relationship. “There’s the hands-on taking care of children in terms of what routinely has to be done—and then there’s the whole other layer of tuning into where they’re at and what their mood is and what else they might need that you didn’t anticipate or plan for. That level of awareness is really significant.”
2. He’s Affectionate
Does he hold your hand and stroke your hair? Clearly love your pet? “That shows a lovingness and caring,” says Greer. Plus, it shows his ability to connect on an emotional level to maintain that bond, which is crucial for parents, says Greer.
3. He Can Handle Stress
Does he shut down or disappear when things (work, the relationship, family stuff, etc.) get sticky? No good. You want a partner who talks through stressors with you, says relationship therapist Rachel Sussman, LCSW, author of The Breakup Bible. Because, fact: Kids are super, duper stressful. You want to have them with someone who can manage the pressure.
4. He Shares His Food
Seriously. See, a good father is someone who’s generous, not stingy, says Greer. So if you’re out to dinner and he doesn’t even pretend to offer you a taste, then reaches over and grabs something off your plate, that’s probably not a good sign. “That tells you that they’re looking out for themselves and they’re more concerned with taking care of themselves than sharing and reciprocating with you,” says Greer.
5. He’s in Touch with His Emotions
If he’s comfortable telling you how he feels about you or talking about the future, that’s good, says Sussman. “Then that person usually, when they make the decision to be a parent, they’ll take it seriously. They’ll be able to be up front with you and tell you how they feel if they’re upset about something, if they’re happy about something.”
6. He’s Down to Shop, Cook, and Clean
You want to co-parent with someone who’s “a true partner in all senses of the word,” says Sussman. If he’s not willing to pitch in now, that could mean trouble down the road.
7. He Makes Sacrifices for You
Maybe he blows off guys’ night to take care of you when you’re sick or he works overtime so he can take off for your friend’s wedding. These unselfish acts show that he’s flexible and responsive, says Greer, and those are both things you want in a partner and a parent.
8. He’s Reliable
If he says he’s going to do something, he needs to actually do it…on a regular basis…without constantly being reminded, says Greer. It’s clear why this is important: You can’t raise a kid with someone you don’t trust to take care of things.
9. The Two of You Have a Great Relationship
“Assess your own relationship and make sure it’s really solid and really in a good place,” says Sussman. “You’ve got to have the relationship first, because having kids will put a stress on you.” All good on the coupledom front? “If you’re really in love, if you have good communication, if you really respect each other, if there’s a really solid friendship, if you have a lot of fun together, and you both want to have children,” she says, “chances are it’s going to work out really nicely.” by Allison Goldman

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Beautiful.

So true

REALLY?

Human being is complex. We keep reading list upon list here .. How to toast babe, how to find a god wife, 10 reasons for this and 20 reasons for that but none of them work!! It depends on the person at the end of the day.

Very beautiful , Future husby take note and start cultivating these qualities now o

andysnoopy:
Human being is complex. We keep reading list upon list here .. How to toast babe, how to find a god wife, 10 reasons for this and 20 reasons for that but none of them work!! It depends on the person at the end of the day.

we learn everyday... Is good to learn to be better

Elantracey:
Very beautiful , Future husby take note and start cultivating these qualities now o

^^^ Huh

Anyways, i know a potential FP thread whenever i see one, and i think i'm just where i ought to be.

This is a beautiful thread op. Thanks

Ok. Mak I interrogate myself knw weda I fit b 1. Ade cum bak

Nice one op.

The length to which a man will go performing those 9 ish is determined by the level at which the dude is into you (Loves you) else no dude in his right senses will do those for no lady.
Cos love has a way of turning a hard dude into a sissy, cant still fathom how, it's like a spell...
Dayum!

Cooking and cleaning

Tanx all....am glad..lets ride on

I hope to be the best dad in the world soon!

This is so me!

All this ladies are on a mission to turn men into their house keepers


Me go just run away kawai

braine:
I hope to be the best dad in the world soon!

Sorry dear, I'll win that back to back from day 1 of my marriage till, I check out of this world, e hear

Funny enof, I have all ten qualities.

But I have a very bad temper, can stand certain attitude from women plus I like to do it a lot.

Bby I hope u are seeing this ?

I have all these characteristics; let the applications roll in

andysnoopy:
Human being is complex. We keep reading list upon list here .. How to toast babe, how to find a god wife, 10 reasons for this and 20 reasons for that but none of them work!! It depends on the person at the end of the day.

the most sensible comment I've read on nairaland. kudos papi.

Wow!!!
I do this things!

I no get babe sha!

Begonia:
This is a beautiful thread op. Thanks

stop stressing urself luking for ur prince, i've already found u, so u're my queen officially today. luv u so much baby.

Can peeps stop all these threads about 'signs' please!!!!













The only signs I know Na 'Signs of the Endtime'!

I try small, 7/9. I don't do that well with the stressors and can't say much on the relationship thingy.
But I just freakin love kids, I mean how can you hate one of the funniest creatures on earth. The way they think is downright funny and you'll be amazed at what you hear them say.

Very beautiful points.

Reading about myself

Every man want to be the best dad but marriage demands more than what we bargain for atimes.Infact situations of things in Nigeria can turn a caring father into a rabid dog.

To all the best dad in the world keep ur heads up......MY KIDS MUST B PROUD OF ME