It's tempting to jump into relationships when we meet someone we believe is wonderful. But if it takes a few months to begin gauging someone's character, and two to three years to truly know them, we are setting ourselves up for disaster if we commit too soon.

Here are nine essential questions to help guide us:

1. How well do I know him/her?
Don't trust someone until you know them. Oh! How we miss this one. A lot.

"But our friends introduced us." It doesn't matter. Anyone can wear masks. The best way to know someone is this: 1) Spend time with them while they're with their family. 2) Listen to the words they say to you. 3) Observe them in a variety of circumstances.

Not watching them interact with their family is one of the worse mistakes we've made in our post-1920s western dating culture. For some reason, "Meet the parents" has become the last step before planning the engagement.

Bad idea.

What kind of family does he/she come from? That was their foundation and upbringing until they left home. No matter how far we travel, those development years left a huge impression on who we are, and who we're likely to resort back to when we're older.

2. Can I trust them with my secrets?
If they share your private conversations with others, walk away or have a serious discussion about that issue. If you don't take care of it now, you'll only resent them later.

3. Are we comfortable together in the quiet?
If they can't enjoy the silence with you, that's actually evidence that there's a lot going on inside them and they need noise for distraction. Spend more time getting to know them before you decide to commit.

More: 5 Signs He's Not The One

4. Do I know how this person will change me?
"We become like the community we're a part of" and "We are a product of our environment" are popular quotes for a reason. Be selective with who you surround yourself with and who you allow to influence you.

Remember too, that you will marry a person you date. So ask this question early.

5. Am I attracted to their heart and character?
It's easy to be attracted to someone physically or to the version of a person someone portrays to the world. But what do they do during their free time? What are their values and beliefs? Our worldview is our center and directs all of our decisions.


Continue Reading At: www.9jaexclusive.net

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