Hi, for most women, the word sex at a point was something to be discussed behind closed doors. Even as married women, most would shy away from admitting that they do engage in sex, but for the obvious tell tale signs of pregnancies and children.

But in recent times, women have become more conscious of their sexuality. Many do not want to do business as usual with their partners. They want to explore and experience first hand, what they have seen and heard of the mysteries of sexual pleasures.

But the road to claiming this special trophy is not as smooth as most would want it. A combination of things are said to be responsible for the inability of a woman to reach that ultimate point during sexual acts. Beginning from this edition, you get to read what some of our respondents have to say about their experiences when the curtains come down.

Please do note that we are looking forward to your contributions to this issue as it might just be the beacon of hope other readers need. Our address remains: The Human Angle, Vanguard, P.M.B. 1007, Apapa, Lagos. Or e-mail address: DESTINYSNAZZY@yahoo.comThis e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it happy reading!

Sadia, (40), Fashion Designer, says she has no need for sexual pleasures:

I don’t know what the noise is about sex. I have been married for 18 years now, and I have not experienced what you are talking about once. It sounds very silly to me when I hear people talking about it as if it is a serious matter.

In fact, I always wonder at what it is they are excited about. Is it not this same sex that one will do and for the next three days you will be having serious body ache? I don’t understand what the big deal is all about.
It is true I know women who say they enjoy it.

I am told that my inability to enjoy sex might have to do with the fact that I was circumcised as a young girl and which I do not dispute.

But I am sure there is something more than meets the eyes in most of the things we see these days. People are taking this sex thing too seriously and it is not good.

That is why we are having all these diseases.
Many years back, things were not like this. You only heard about single girls dating older men, but not young men chasing desperately after older women.

We only used to hear about gonorrhoea and syphilis, but now, the diseases associated with sex are almost as many as the people who engage in the act. Personally, I don’t see anything special about sex.
My husband was my first and still the only man that I have had sex with.

I knew him when I was in secondary school and he worked with a multinational company then. We were both young, though he is older with a couple of years, and had other girlfriends then.

When I finished secondary school and did not gain admission into a higher institution immediately, my mother insisted that I should not remain idle at home, but go to a fashion school to learn how to make clothes.

Her argument then was that, no knowledge is lost and that the devil will always find work for idle hands. If I stayed home doing nothing, she was sure that anything might happen.

Even with that, it did. My mother had great foresight. I got pregnant two years after, and that was the end of my plans to further my education.

But I have no regrets today. My first two children are in the University, and the third is in secondary school. We are not rich, but we are living fine.
When I got pregnant, my parents and friends thought that I must have been having sex for a long time and that God finally caught up with us.

But it was not so, we only did it twice, the second time being four months after the first. I gave in on the two occasions only because he overpowered me. I did not enjoy it, and the story has remained the same ever since. Even after several years, we still struggle with each other.

On days that I know that I am too tired to argue, I just give in and let him do what he wants to do. Other times, I go and sleep in the boy’s room. Sometimes, I feign annoyance, headache, stomach pain, or some other minor ailments just so he will keep his distance.

As I am now, I have no need for sex, not to talk of enjoying it and looking forward to achieving any kind of orgasm. I have three children who are doing great and have no need for others.

For me, sex is not food. If a woman engages in too much sex, she will age quickly. Women who try to please their husbands every night or every time they demand for sex can only have themselves to blame at the end of the day. Too much sex wears the body out.

That is why you see many young girls in their late teens and early twenties looking more like women in their 30s and 40s who have had two three children. There is very little innocence about most of the young girls we have in this country today.

The terrible thing is that they do all these acts right under the noses of their parents and some of the parents encourage them.

I always tell my daughter, when the time is right, sex is something you are not going to be so eager to look forward to. By the time you get the consent of family and God, you will be tired of sex and there will be little or nothing left. Personally, I think we as parents need to have a rethink over where the youths of this country are going.

Grace, (46), Housewife, says it's a feeling one cannot capture in words. However, she hardly gets there anymore. Why? She narrates:

I grew up in the heart of Surulere in the 70s and 80s. Those were the wonder years. I doubt if such a period can ever come around again in the history of this country. We had life at its best. I was born and raised in Surulere and if you had any inkling of what Surulere was like then, you will be able to capture the scenario we lived at the time.

We are from Delta state but no one would have guessed but for those very close to us. I’d had my share of parties, boyfriends, you know, good fun. We assumed that things would always be the way they were. In that kind of environment, it is given that sex will be part of the things that fills up the script. And that was good too.

I can describe orgasm as the peak of sexual enjoyment for both the man and the woman. It does not take too much for a man to reach orgasm, whether he enjoys the sex or not is another matter. But I doubt that a woman can reach orgasm if she does not enjoy it.

The enjoyment must be there to be able to get to that peak point. In fact, if one had a boyfriend that one did not enjoy sex with, not to mention achieving orgasm, you must find a way to dump him. Growing up, we even used to make fun of such guys.

I come from a family of seven girls, we had female cousins living with us, and if we include our friends, you can imagine what it was like. So, if you have not reached that point, it was easy to discover through discussion with other girls and also learn one or two tricks on how to get the guy to take you there.
I can’t really describe the feeling.

It is something that begins from one point of your body and goes round like electric shock. You feel it everywhere. Growing up was good until everything crumbled.

As we were growing up, we were aware that we were not from Lagos. Sometimes, our parents would travel to our home town, but we never went with them.

I'd love to play, but I'm feeling very lazy to read the long post

Sadia sounds so sad.

Two interesting point of views. I'll go with Grace's view.

right?

KarmaMod:

Sadia sounds so sad.

DaPhoenix:

Two interesting point of views. I'll go with Grace's view.

you mean to tell me that you two actually read the long post?

watz ur point?

i think sadia is just one of the many reasons some men cheat on their wives cox then he will go outside and look for sex since the wife is so stingy with hers.

right
it true

abeg she just need to relax and enjoy her sex life, we all have one life to live no more sex after death. she need to stop nagging how sex is this and that and enjoy the show

Grace's story isn't complete, please finish it.

I'm coming

~Sissy~:

i think sadia is just one of the many reasons some men cheat on their wives cox then he will go outside and look for sex since the wife is so stingy with hers.

She's not stingy, she just doesnt enjoy it since her barbaric family felt the need to mutilate her Instruments.

Her story is so depressing

where is Richy Black so he can tell us more about how "great" FGM is. Were buruku

Am not sittin for an exam now,Haba long thing man.

Sorry, what is it you're saying?

~Sissy~:

abeg she just need to relax and enjoy her sex life, we all have one life to live no more sex after death. she need to stop nagging how sex is this and that and enjoy the show

Yeah right Sissy. I guess its not too let for her. I really pity her

~Sissy~:

abeg she just need to relax and enjoy her sex life, we all have one life to live no more sex after death. she need to stop nagging how sex is this and that and enjoy the show

Yeah right Sissy. I guess its not too late for her. I really pity her

Hear Sadia

Is it not this same sex that one will do and for the next three days you will be having serious body ache?

This is to the spouse's eternal credit.Good to know there are other guys who do it right.

am so sorry but i cant read the post, its too long!