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| I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 3:06pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
Hello my pple, I am extracting this thread from my former post about my gf that resumed school in owerri as a jambite, Based on experience, its was obviously known that she might start changing which is the way of life here in Nija with our gurls, I am sure yall know when your gurl loves u, she does not need to say it, the way she talks to you on phone gives you an impression that she is in love, thats just a minor example, but Im taking the example as a fact now. The way she talks to me on phone gives me an obvious sign that she is drifting away so fast. I am about to tell her that we should call the relationship a quit, but I am feeling too slow to do that. Reason is because 2 weeks into our relationship, I broke up with her due to some valid reason, not cheating or woeva, she cried and cried, I accepted her back. A week after, I broke up with her again because she was being too pushy telling me I have found another girl just because I did not call her a whole day, she broke down after the second break up that her mum had to intervene into the issue. I gladly accepted her back for the second time, the love became stronger afterwards cos she claimed no other guy has ever broken with her b4. With all this that has happened, she told me to promise her that I'll never break her heart anymore, I responded by saying, I wont break your heart for a selfish reason, but if you cheat on me, I definitely will. A promise I made has actually slowed down my action in order to call this relationship a quit, because I do not know if she is cheating, not sounding the way she use to is not enough for me to break up with her, but I feel its the best thing to do before its too late. My pple, we are of different kinds, and our emotions are quite different in terms of how we express it, I am a very emotional guy, so I feel its better I call it a quit now before she does that herself, and if she does, then than means I am going to have to heal the wound for months. I need a good adviser on what to do, please no insult, just advises Please. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 4:59pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
Yepaaaaaaa!!!! is my post invisible? I need response oo, Nlanders holler |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by sistajay(f): 5:13pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
Looks like you need to let her go, you aint serious. Im sure another man will do a better job than you. All you need now is a few tears to get over her, no more she loves me. . . . .she loves me not . . . . . she loves me. . . . . . she loves me not!!! |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 5:16pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
sista-jay: HhAHAHAHA, Cry for wetin nah? I just need to know if i shud let go or not, |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by sistajay(f): 5:19pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
Only you know whether to let her go or not, you don't need me to tell you that. Follow your heart/feelin. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 5:33pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
sista-jay: Attimes one is not capable of carrying out a decision unless we seek insight to what the situation is. Thats why I am on NL. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by DaPhoenix(f): 5:35pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
Ok, you said you've broken up with her so end of thread. I suggest you date someone older than 20 next time and allow those young girls to grow up. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by Sauron1: 5:38pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
eyonigger: Break up with this babe. Naija babes believe once they get into tertiary institutions, they must UPgrade themselves. It is not a myth. U will be safer getting a babe that is ALREADY in the University than the one that is just going IN. If u love your heart, end it and find somebody else. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 6:41pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
I just sent a txt that its over, saying its best for both of us, she has not yet responded, not even expecting one, what am really surprised about is the fact that she has only spent one week there, and quick to change, mehn guys are fast, hahaha |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by olanajim(m): 6:55pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
Why didn't you meet her first before making a decision? Why must you base your suspicion on the way "she talk" on phone?". How did she talk on phone that made you think she is drifting away? Anyway, since you have ended it, let her be. But next time handle things in a mature way. . . |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 7:14pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
olanajim: I would not want to go into details about the way she has been acting, but its very obvious she is drifting away, I know the Ifeoma that I have, I love my heart more than our relationship, cant afford messing it up, so therefore calling an end to it makes it better for me to be on a safer side. She has been calling and I just cannot pick up call, a technique i learnt when i broke up with my ex,cos if i keep talking to her or exchanging txt messages, feelings would start coming back, cos I just vowed to marry my hustle for now, |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by olanajim(m): 7:45pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
One: since you didn't supply the forum with detail, it mean only you is in the best position to advise yourself. Take it or leave it. Two: from the way you talk, it is obvious you love her too much yet, your fear of being hurt predominate your emotion. And so the only escape route you can think of is opting out. You have done nothing wrong as far as common sense is concerned. But in the light of reality, you might have handle it in another way. Third: that relationship, in itself is doomed to fail if it is true that you broke up with her twice in the first one month of knowing her. It simply mean mean the two of you don't blend well from day one. Naturally, she would dump you once she find a better man at school. But not all troublesome ladies are cheaters. That is a fact that I find out much later in life. Three: someone said the lady or girl is under 20, if that is true, then I am in support of your action. If she were my sister, I will ask her to spend at least 2 years in school and evaluate her feeling before saying "I love you" to you. Girls under 20 are generally prone to change of heart especially if they were driven to love by peer influences. So my admonition to you is to always take relationship at friendship level. That way, you can have enough time to understand her better. Knowing someone within a month and breaking away twice within the same period indicated that you both started as lovers rather than friends. Finally, I don't think you can handle long distance r/shp. Well, I just pray you find your match. I mean someone who will stay close to you. As for you afraid of picking her call lest you start loving her again. It is very obvious that you are weak in matter of heart. Pick her call and let her know why you are quiting. Let her know what was wrong. If you just quit that way, you are cruel. At any rate, you need help yourself! |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eminemkayc: 7:48pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
Never heard dis phrase b4 ", Call it a quit, " xcept on NL!cud u pls correct urslf,inorder 2 avoid readers digestng d rung use of d idiomatc xpression!! |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by olanajim(m): 8:10pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
If that is directed at me, then you are wasting your time, Mr Man. I don't come to nl to receive a medal in English language. I have passed my courses and graduated. I don't even read my post twice before posting. Once I tyqe, it is gone. Ok? Maybe you can help me prove read them. I posts from my phone 'cos I don't want to be distracted from better thing. Correction ko, Correction ni! |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eminemkayc: 9:04pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
Nigerians nd thr refusal 2 adopt a volteface, even in d face of lucid errors! V. Regrettable |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 11:47pm On Jan 19, 2009 |
eminemkayc: You be mumu, instead of u to contribute, u dey correct ma error. Anyway I go correct myself. "call it quits" olanajim: Yes I understood the fact that I am being selfish and cruel by not picking her call. But anyway she sent me a after which I explained my reason for ending our relationship,message goes, : So u felt the best thing to do is to break u,u know wat, dis can cus u just 2 be a man and face challenges. do not run away from wat u r meant 2 face,.let ur partner be aware of it. Well I felt a little bit touched, and I replied her about my fear's and agreed that I was wrong not to have discussed anything with her before pronouncing a breakup. She replied saying she loves me and has forgiven me as well, and apologized for hurting me. But now I want to know why she is hurting me, still waiting for her call. damn love don turn me to smally. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by Dontaxer: 1:13am On Jan 20, 2009 |
Dey there, 1 correct bobo, dön chike her, the guy the tidy, him dey do viera work, very soon boiling. And once em boil her. Game over 4 u. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 1:32am On Jan 20, 2009 |
Don taxer: |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by HOLLASLYD(m): 3:06am On Jan 20, 2009 |
Come on hommie.you can't just break up with her on the phone.this is what you discuss with her,make your point,then take the step you just took on the phone.well apperently the relationship is not yet over.since it's the phone version of quits.then i say you did the right things by calling it quits just that it was not properly done. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by RasPwn(m): 3:13am On Jan 20, 2009 |
Aren't you the guy that gets nervous around better looking guys? I think you should work on your obvious self-esteem issues first. Its's already affecting your relatioship. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 3:37am On Jan 20, 2009 |
HOLLASLYD: We are back together now, but still have worries. Thanks bra!! Ras Pwn: Yes I was, I am working on it already. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by olanajim(m): 7:48am On Jan 20, 2009 |
Mr poster, you must be older than that girl. In that case, you have to learn to talk things out before making erratic decisions. She was right to say you are evading problems. If you are to break up with every lady that behave funny to you at a stage in your r/shp, then you will have a high stat to show at the end of the day. If you think she is hurting you, why not discus with her? Study her and find out why she do that. Talk to her and tell her you want the two of you to be "just friends." If along the line you find that you are compatible for real r/shp, then you will propose formally. Treat her well but don't invest too much of your heart in her. That way, if she dump you, you will not be hurt. Visit her at school. Sometimes with notice, at another time without. But don't stalk her or follow her about. Learn to understand her. Make it clear that you want her, but if she know she does not want you, she should tell you so you can part in peace instead of wasting time. Be in control. Until you are satisfied. If she persists in her way, look for a better lady. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by olanajim(m): 7:51am On Jan 20, 2009 |
I think I understand you now, mr poster, after reading your last post. YOU ARE THE PROBLEM! Pls fix it! |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by RasPwn(m): 7:54am On Jan 20, 2009 |
olanajim:^^^^^ Same thing I told him. You will keep having this same problem with every girl you get, paranoia will keep getting the best of you until you find a way to fix your own faulty self-esteem |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by babsongudus: 8:49am On Jan 20, 2009 |
Pedophile u r. Rookie ass! |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by HOLLASLYD(m): 10:21am On Jan 20, 2009 |
The world is not a bed of roses you know. challenges come and you don't wizzle out of them,you deal with them. my point is that before you make rational decisions,you must have thought exhaustively about it.you guys are back together good. The number of break ups and make ups shows there is real love between you two. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by HOLLASLYD(m): 10:21am On Jan 20, 2009 |
The world is not a bed of roses you know. challenges come and you don't wizzle out of them,you deal with them. my point is that before you make rational decisions,you must have thought exhaustively about it.you guys are back together good. The number of break ups and make ups shows there is real love between you two. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by Aragonc: 10:26am On Jan 20, 2009 |
i would rather betray the whole wide world than let the world or rather one person in the world betray me. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by steve49ja(m): 10:50am On Jan 20, 2009 |
Mehn mehn mehn Another bro in tangled emotions I really dunno what to type nor advice cos i'm having a shady picture of this. If the problem is you being intimidated by other dudes(better looking or richer) then you have to step up your game, i tell you not-so-handsome men end up with beauties and damsels. Break-up and make-up then break-up again then make-up is crazy! Understand yourself and what it is you want. But truth be told bro you berra prepare your heart for the worse cos a girl in Uni would have a whole lot of advances and ''if you never give am belle or marry am you have a higher rate of losing her even if she's a pastor's daughter''. Get a girl by the side too someone to occupy your thoughts and share your heart,so if this relationship goes the other way you'll have something to fall back on. Try not to be so commited to the relationship whatever she decides should be fine with you. Visit her once in a while and have her come over too but seriously you have a lot of decision-making issues to treat. I'll also like to know do you wanna marry this girl? i mean why not let her be and find someone around you who can come over for a dinner or somfin sometime? Just so you know break-up aint easy if you still have feelings but it takes strength to overcome.DECIDE IF YOU WANNA LEAVE----LEAVE!!!EVEN IF HER MUM COMES OVER TO TALK TO YOU OK??just decide on what you want and stand by it. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by DrTony1(m): 11:32am On Jan 20, 2009 |
@Eyonigger, I sure say no b IMSU ur girl dey, From ur post I undastand U dont tink deep abt d consequences,maybe due to confusion 4rm Luv.Give ur chick sum more tym n make sure U see in person b4 taking any action |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 8:42pm On Jan 20, 2009 |
olanajim: I have discussed it with her the reason why she is hurting me, she says it aint intentional, stating that pressure and distraction are major reasons for the cause. I actually have a gurl that I really do not love, but she loves me die, I have been communicating well with her now in order to build a mutual feeling towards her, just in case the worse happens. olanajim: How am I the problem sir? Please be specific!! HOLLASLYD: Yes we are in love, I have learnt not to make such decisions without discussing it wit the other party. steve49ja: Yes I am not investing all my heart into the relationship ever since she left, she also stated that she has nt been seeing better looking people when I asked her if cream boys are there . saying they are just razz as they can be, but today she said she has been seeing admirers that seems to be good looking, my response to that didnt seem that threatening towards myself. With that alone, I am getting a picture that the wolves are drawing near. I am travelling to Owerri next month for her bday, would one on one observe what her feelings still look like. Finally I still do not want to decide either to leave, but I guess to leave things the way it is and keep looking wud be the best thing to do. Dr.Tony: Nah she is in FUTO, Right now I am giving her time to straighten out herself. |
| Re: I Need A Very Good Adviser On This: You Are More Blessed If You Do by eyonigger(m): 7:46am On Jan 21, 2009 |
where them niggers@? |
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