;d ;d ;d ;d omg, lmao

A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, "You've been a good cat all of these years. Anything you desire is yours, all you have to do is ask."

The cats says, "Well, I lived all my life with a poor family on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors." God says, "Say no more." And instantly, a fluffy pillow appears. A few days later, 6 mice are killed in a tragic accident and they go to Heaven. God meets them at the gate with the same offer that He made the cat.

The mice said, "All our lives we've had to run. We've been chased by cats, dogs and even women with brooms. If we could only have a pair of roller skates, we wouldn't have to run anymore." God says, "Say no more." And instantly, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful pair of tiny roller skates.

About a week later, God decides to check and see how the cat is doing. The cat is sound asleep on his new pillow. God gently wakes him and asks,

"How are you doing? Are you happy here?"

The cat yawns and stretches and says, "Oh, I've never been happier in my life. And those Meals on Wheels you've been sending over are the best!"

A country preacher decided to skip services one Sunday and head to the hills to do some bear hunting. As he rounded the corner on a perilous twist in the trail, he and a bear collided, sending him and his rifle tumbling down the mountainside. Before he knew it, his rifle went one way and he went the other, landing on a rock and breaking both legs. That was the good news. The bad news was the ferocious bear charging at him from a distance, and he couldn't move. "Oh, Lord," the preacher prayed, "I'm so sorry for skipping services today to come out here and hunt. Please forgive me and grant me just one wish, please make a Christian out of that bear that's coming at me. Please, Lord!"

That very instant, the bear skidded to a halt, fell to its knees, clasped its paws together and began to pray aloud right at the preacher's feet.
"Dear God, bless this food I am about to receive, "

Cracking my ribs[/color][color=#990000][color=#990000][/color]

'family matter' "Doc, yuh think maybe is de light that attractin' them?" lmao

:d :d :d :p

Cool.

sima:

:d :d :d :p

error sima

crazykid:

Cool.

crazylad whats cool?

The joke.

sorry all na family affairs

I'm back
guys i 2 gbadun that familyaffair/monkey joke. Can't stop laughin joke of da week

I'm back
guys i 2 gbadun that familyaffair/monkey joke. Can't stop laughin joke of da week

sylve11:

error sima

i know
ur unclothedness caused it. .

na wa o see sumtin

Geez! been gone 4 a few weeks, i com bak and theaz no one i know!

welcome back

Thanks, and uh, who are u! I dont like pretty galz coming to take away my boys na!

but am a guy

Ma bad, thought shola's a chic's name!ahem.

i don't understand one bit of what you people are trying to say but it is either the jokes are dumb or i am. fortunately, every one tells me i'm the smartest kid alive on earth so what do you make of it?[color=#000099][/color] [color=#000099][/

you are smartest kid to dumb
go back and read from the beggining
if symptoms persist after 10 readings
consult your lecturer

well, it is said that when the lizard fell from the tree, he looked around and when he saw that the people around didn't praise him, he praised himself. i only thought you wouldn't notice my absence from lecture.[smiles shyly]

sure u wanna be ME

but not with the bowlegs

are you sure this is
your real pics
u look like, , , , , , , , , , , .

well, i'm proud of my pics so much that i can show it to the world. But HEY!!!!! i'm new here. is this how you welcome new members? well, the hell with that.