Aloy+Emeka:

Stop fooling yourself, if you believe marriage is solely on love, then you can believe anything. Race and tribe plays an intrinsic role in marriage and no matter how open minded you are, you can never bypass those factors. Even in civilized world, race is still a stumbling block in marital unions. If you think a Fulani family will wholly accept your Ekiti behind when you marry their son, then think again. Same is applicable to other tribes.

A friend of mine broke up with his Ekiti fincee because the girl's mother refused to accept him due to the fact that he is Efik. As a matter of fact, she started by calling him Omo ibo and no matter how hard her daughter try to educate her about his ethnic group, she still complains he is omo Igbo.

Another Ekiti guy I know could not marry his fiancee because his family refused to support the union and threatened to boycott the marriage simply because the lady is Ijebu. Even though both of them resides in UK and the lady was born in UK, they couldn't continue with the marriage because of pressures from the guy's family back home.

Many Igbos do not want their children to marry from Mbise or Ngwaland and it is a fact. They will rather have their children marry Yoruba or oyibo than Mbise or Ngwa and you know Yorubas feel the same about the Ijebu tribe.

So, one can defy family politics and continue with the marriage like some people have done but one also need to think it over because of who will have your back when trouble comes from such unions.

EzeUche22:

Of course a lot of Igbo mothers would not allow their children to marry someone from Mbaise or Ngwa.

My mother would disown me if I married a Ngwa woman.

EzeUche22:

Of course a lot of Igbo mothers would not allow their children to marry someone from Mbaise or Ngwa.

My mother would disown me if I married a Ngwa woman.

On a more serious note, I have heard alot of Igbos not liking the mbise and ngwa people but what is the different? are they not the same igbos? Someone told me they are from a slavery generation or thereabout pls tell me more about them.

oyinda.:

it's natural for that to happen.
Usually, when a culture is in the process of being absorbed into another, it happens through interethnic/racial marriages. The men from the dominating culture is usually more able to take a wife from the minority culture.
I'm speaking on a smaller scale here ie Lagos state where the dominant culture is Yoruba.
the same will not apply elsewhere in igboland for example. over there, the yoruba women will be more willing to marry a igbo guy. rather than vice versa. there aren't too many yorubas in igboland so this theory cannot really be proved i guess.

You made so much sense here oyinda.

ChinenyeN:

Oyinda, about your theory, that sort of thing is provable, because it is observable, and from what I've observed, you're more or less right. Most to nearly all Yoruba-Igbo marriages that I've witnessed are Igbo male and Yoruba female.

oyinda.:


and these marriages you witnessed were in igboland right?
because i would think that igbo man/ yoruba woman marriages will most likely take place in a igbo land. while yoruba man/ igbo woman marriages will most likely take place in yoruba land and lagos.

[b]oh and if the culture is matriarchal like with the African Americans (women are the head of households etc). it is the male that will be married off into the dominant culture.
Nigerians are patriarchal so it is the women of the less dominant culture that are married off to men from the dominant cultur[/b]e
at least that's what i'm theorizing anyways.

because i would think that igbo man/ yoruba woman marriages will most likely take place in a igbo land

Aloy+Emeka:

I don't know where you people get information. African Americans do not have matriarchal culture. Women heading households does not equate to matriarchy, rather they (like other Americans from every race) are having marital issues thereby making their divorce rate high. Some of the kids may assume the last name of their mother mostly because their paternity is in question.
A large percentage of African American families like the American culture run on patriarchy. Get your facts right next time.

oyinda.:

what are you on about. did you check your dictionary before posting!?
last name means nothing and is reduced to just a silly contraption if the reason it created in the first place is no longer in function.
to me, AA children might as well take their father's last name just in order to trace and search for their dad in the future. not because they belong to his family.
AA culture is matriarchal. and even Obama will agree.

matriarchy
n., pl., -chies. In both senses also called matriarchate.

   1. A social system in which the mother is head of the family.
   2. A family, community, or society based on this system or governed by women.

A family or society in which authority is held by females, through whom descent and inheritance are traced. More generally, a matriarchy is a society dominated by women.
http://www.answers.com/topic/matriarchy

oyinda.:

re-read my post 

you are the one with the misconception.

and the thing about institutionalized patriarchy. i don't understand what u mean. that doesn't apply to african american society. to me culture dictates institutions anyways. white americans have a patriarchy because that's how their culture is.  and as far as i'm concerned African Americans have a culture that is distinct from that of White Americans owing to the fact that they've had an isolated experience for centuries.
mothers in naija who are head of households number similarly to african american fathers who are head of households. these numbers are very low.
i don't know why you are trying to argue this because it is very obvious.

Many African American women are not head of households by choice, rather the situation and the system they find themselves in forced them into becoming the head of households

steaming: i don't know if anyone has noticed it or is it just mi? Yoruba Boys are just marrying Igbo Gals anyhow. But why?

Please what is it about Igbo Gals that keeps attracting Yoruba Boys or what is it about Yoruba Boys that keep attracting Igbo Gals.

please tell mi. i think m finding myself in dat same situation too