obong:



Some other guys are already asking me to marrying them but i've asked them to wait. I really love this guy am with but I can't wait for him forever can I? What do I do because i don't want to put the marriage pressure on him and at the same time, I want to settle down?


maybe this is the problem. if other guys are asking you to marry them, then ti appears that you have some sort of side relationship with those others guys and your boyfriend knows it and doesnt want anythign to do with you. idont see how these other guys want to marry you without you giving them something something

I quite agree with you my guy cos i dont understand what she is talking about. sometimes girls think they are smart by having flocks of boyfriends and settle with probably the richest of them.
   see girl, i guess you are still searching and you have same feelings for all these guys including the one you are expecting to say I WILL MARRY YOU.
 my advice
   dont waste your time with someone you are not sure if he will ever say he will marry you, and if those saying they want to marry you are not as rich as this guy, you can take the risk and be HAPPY.
  What you dont know
this guy may have another chik elsewhere that he has been hiding may be in unilag( e.g. part3) and you may be shocked if he unleashes.
  i am not poisoning your heart about this guy but it is not impossible that stuffs like this could happen.

                 MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY GIRL
                 NO DULLING THIS IS 2006
                 ARE YOU NOT SWEET

what u need to know is his financial status,
is he financially stable enough 2 marry/keep a wife,
that is one of the major things that delay/prevent a guy 4rm popping the question,
cos what if he pops it n u say yes, then he has no money to marry u,
in naija here, u need like a min of 1m to 1.5million to prepeare 4 both trad n church wedding,

n back to u, how old are u?,
how old is he?,
are u both xtians?

Desperation is a byotch!!
You apparently don't know what you want. You are willing to settle down with the next thing that proposes to you and looks remotely like a man.
Carry on, I ain't mad at you.

@ bubus
don't mind her jare,
she thought the guy na mumu, she wants him to say he will marry her while she is still seeing some other people saying they want to marry her, you know she has been given these people something to chop
  boys watchout ooo, girls are sampling us

earthrealm:


n back to u, how old are u?,
how old is he?,
are u both xtians?

@earthrealm - does it matter?

@ lIONESS Men have a way of flaunting marriage in the face of "ripe" ladies.

OOUUCCHH!!!

Radiant:

@ lIONESS Men have a way of flaunting marriage in the face of "ripe" ladies.

OOUUCCHH!!!

I thot it was the females who expert in that department.Haba,what is up with this your reverse psychology
Abi dey don flaunt for your face b/4?

may be is not ready, bt u can just do urself a favour by followin
ur heart

i don't think there is anything wrong with being concerned that marriage is not coming up 15 months into the relationship. She does not give her age (if she was 20 - we can say she's moving too fast, if she's 40 - she has a serious point). Now, she mentions that there are other guys proposing to her (concurrent to her relationship). That I find to be weird. Maybe if she could explain how she's in a relationship with a guy she "loves" there are still other men who are making proposals.

@Idiot
The issues you raised were raised and answered (by me, just my guess) on pg 2. Also on pg 2, she said she is 30.

@Ally
If he mentions marriage that is a good sign. Why don't you mention it too? If you do already than mention it a bit more to give him a hint. That way he knows what's on your mind w/o you having to propose.

But I don't think you need to worry. 30 is not old & you're relationship is not 2 yrs old yet. You wouldn't want to rush things & then be disappointed.

30 is not old? You must be joking!!

I don't think 30 is old. Why should it be? 30 may not be 'young' but it's not old either. Ask Oprah.

So if Ophrah is 60yrs and unmarried that makes it Ok.C'mon chinani you don't expect me to believe that you are praying to be unmarried in your thirties

And which one is that she may not be young but not old.An ambiguous stmt that does not apply to women.No hard feelings in terms of age a woman can be 2 things, young or Old!

Uche2nna:

So if Ophrah is 60yrs and unmarried that makes it Ok.C'mon chinani you don't expect me to believe that you are praying to be unmarried in your thirties

The Oprah comment was meant as a joke. I didn't mean to imply anything about Oprah's marital status especially since she's been w/ the same man for almost 25 years & doesn't wish to marry.

As for me, I'm not praying to be married or unmarried since either one can leave you miserable or content.

My statement wasn't meant to be ambiguous. Au contrarie I was suggesting there is an age between young & old. The 30s is that age (decade). (Even 40 is not "old" it is 'older' but not "old". Not yet. That's 50. )

If you think that ladies are either "young or old" then that is your opinion. I don't have to accept your opinion & you don't have to accept mine.

There you go again with your ambiguity.Quote I am not praying to be married or unmarried Unquote Girl wat is wrong with you

How is that ambiguous? Maybe you're too obtuse to understand.

Obtuse Ok Can you break it down for for obtuse uche to understand.

You're such a good sport Uche. Anyhow, like I said, I didn't mean to be ambiguous. What I'm trying to say is that "30" is not an age I'm attaching my hopes and dreams too. I want to be (a)content, (b)successful & (c) to have a family, not necessarily in that order. If I do not have (c) by my 30th birthday should I drink poison or cut myself?

While I'm not praying to be unmarried, I don't pray to be married either. I have nothing against marriage but it's not something I pray about. So when I added my 20 kobo to the thread this was my mindset. Understand me now?

chinani:


While I'm not praying to be unmarried, I don't pray to be married either. I have nothing against marriage but it's not something I pray about.

Chinani, please I'm curious to know why you're not keen on marriage?

Good Sport!Wetin that one mean!I be futboll abi basketball
Yeah I understand you.But just like Radiant I want to know y marriage is not a hot topic for you.
And please no drink poison,If worst comes to worst I go come marry u if you go fit manage me

This man don't want to marry you. WHat else do u want to hear?

_{Read my signature.}

@Radiant & Uche2nna
I don't think of myself as not being "keen" on marriage but like I said people are content and/or miserable whether they're married or single. Being married doesn't "make" you happy like yeast makes bread rise. It can contribute to happiness but I think happiness, joy, contentment are things people must feel for themselves -- marriage works best that way. (These are all just ideas as I've never been married.)

If I pray to be married & am miserable, people will say "be careful what you wish for". So in the interest of being careful what I wish for, I don't wish for any[i]one[/i].

[center]Having said all that, men are mean. [/center]

hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
ok i see, in nigeria, 30 is considered old 4 a woman 2 be unmarried, how old is ur b/f?.
so i now kinda understand why the gal is desparate,

my advice 2 u, is give the guy a couple of months more.if he doesnt act serious, accept the next best guy on ur list,


cest simpliscite!!!

Why waste "a couple of months" on a relationship that is going nowhere?

i think we have a seriuos problem here because it seems the original poster is expressing the feelings of many girls.

If Ally1 is 30 and this guy is also around this same age, he is old enough to know what he wants and we should all stop sugar coating this for her, and tell her the truth.

@Ally1
The hard truth is this guy is just not that into you honey. It is time for you to move on to someone who could really love you and give you what you truly desire, which is marriage. Please just pray on this and God will answer. I had this same issue a few years ago and I prayed and God Answered and I asked God to make me strong enough to accept His answer, and everything was ok. By surrendering to God, my real husband that God intended for me was sent to me. I did not even have to wonder anymore. By holding onto this guy you may be blocking God's real blessing. Please Ally1 I know you are going through a tough time right now and most of us have been there too, but surrender this to God and He will bless you with what you need. Don't worry about what your society says, 30 is not too old. you are at a great age, just don't rush. God will bless you with a husband at any age. His time is not our time. Just slow down honey and let God move.

15 MONTH IS TOO LONG TO KNOW WHERE A RELATIONSHIP IS HEADING TO. BUT WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN TALKING ABOUT IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP? I HOPE YOU ARE NOT PRESUMPTOUS ABOUT THE GUY . MAY BE HE LOVE HIM MORE THAN HE LOVES YOU. PERHAPS HE LOVES SOMEBODY ELSE BUT YOU ARE BLIND ABOUT IT. OPEN YOUR EYES LOVE THE PERSON WHO REALLY APPRECIATES YOU AND WANTS YOU 4 LIFE. DON'T PUT SUCH A PERSON ON THE WAITING LIST.

IMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Una go kill me for the nairalnad one day

chinani:

@Radiant & Uche2nna
I don't think of myself as not being "keen" on marriage but like I said people are content and/or miserable whether they're married or single. Being married doesn't "make" you happy like yeast makes bread rise. It can contribute to happiness but I think happiness, joy, contentment are things people must feel for themselves -- marriage works best that way. (These are all just ideas as I've never been married.)

If I pray to be married & am miserable, people will say "be careful what you wish for". So in the interest of being careful what I wish for, I don't wish for any[i]one[/i].

[center]Having said all that, men are mean. [/center]

Yeah! And if you extrapolate further,Women are meaner!