cococandy:
He will give me the side eye and be like
"I don't wanna hear that"

The look on his face will make me not want to even mention anything concerning other guys from before. Except I deliberately want to spoil his mood.

I don't know what these ones want to torture themselves for.

That is why I asked what type of men ask these stoopid questions in the first place
From the responses so far the problem is mainly with the ladies not the men
The men don't have to ask
The ladies are already volunteering information willy nilly,info that were not asked,many men here have confirmed it
Obviously many of them enjoy these stories so they can gossip with their friends and use it against the females if they choose
And now it seems like the ladies are saying no more foolishness ,they can't handle it

babyosisi:


Let us do some role playing
I meet you,you are not a virgin neither am I
Please tell me some of these questions you will ask me

I know you didn't ask me, but my question will go thus

Though I have to state it that it's quid pro quo, I'll be open & truthful to your questions & I expect same from you. I can't stomach lies

1. How many relationships have you been in?

a. In these relationships, did you cheat on ur partner? If yes
ai.how long did the affair last
aii.what led to the affair & how did it end?

b. where they healthy relationships, were you abused verbally or physically or sexually
c.were you sexually active in these relationship

The above questions is to help me ascertain if she is a damaged good & also to check if there was a pattern that repeated all through & to also see if she has turned a new leaf(assuming she was a cheat) to also check if she sought for help in terms of counseling and all of that

2.have you procured an abortion before?
a. how many times & were there complications in any of the procedures

b. did you go for checkup to ascertain that all was ok, I.e no complications

c. Will you be willing to go for a comprehensive checkup with me

3. Do you have any child or children, if yes

a. What was the circumstances that led to that birth

b. is the father of the child involved in the child's life or your life or will there be a future interference ?

4.have you ever contemplated suicide or have you attempted one before(my coz once dated a lady like that, so am taking no chances on that)

5. Do you have any health condition, eg HIV, Hepatitis, sickle cell, hypertension, ulcer, asthma etc if yes

a. How have you been managing it, what's your lifestyle like

I ask this cos I can't be with someone who is hypertensive & is still involved in smoking & drinking (for us to be together I have to see the willingness to change or at least a pattern of trying to live a healthy life)

6. have you promised anyone marriage before? If yes, how did it end, was it amicable?


There are more questions but we can peg it here, someone might say that I'm setting myself up for disappointment cos I will likely hear what I want to hear

That's why I will cite my caveat emptor, if you decieve me into marriage, the day I discover the heavy weight, that's the day the union will end

The answers to some of the questions throws a light into how the person has lived, the kind of crowd the person moved with, if the person has realized his or her mistakes, is willing to change etc

Cc:cococandy

^^^^^^

After calling me names,you want me to answer your questions o kwa ya

I am coming,let me go and fetch water to baff first

babyosisi:
^^^^^^
After calling me names,you want me to answer your questions o kwa ya
I am coming,let me go and fetch water to baff first

I said no hard feelings na!!
Oya sorry na, people fight & make up
Though your stance dey make my head touch sha

harveyspec:


I said no hard feelings na!!

Oya sorry na, people fight & make up

Though your stance dey make my head touch sha

But honestly let me go and baff
I am coming
You see how your questions are like A Level,I need to prepare well and wash off all impurities of the flesh to tackle it one by each,one by each
( according to the gateman at FGGC)

I agree with you.

But for number two, I will limit the questions to "will you be willing to go for a check up with me?"
Reason being that most people might feel the questions are asked to judge them and even if they say no when the answer is yes, you then asking if they will be willing to go for a check makes it look like you didn't take their word for it.

So in my opinion, it's kinda pointless asking that question instead of stating that you require a test done before the marriage. Afterall you'd be willing to subject yourself to those fertility and STD tests too. It makes everything simpler. We just go for tests to ascertain that we are both okay and forget about uncomfortable questions.

My opinion.

harveyspec:


I know you didn't ask me, but my question will go thus

Though I have to state it that it's quid pro quo, I'll be open & truthful to your questions & I expect same from you. I can't stomach lies

1. How many relationships have you been in?
a. In these relationships, did you cheat on ur partner?
b. where they healthy relationships, were you abused verbally or physically or sexually
c.were you sexually active in these relationship

The above questions is to help me ascertain if she is a damaged good & also to check if there was a pattern that repeated all through & to also see if she has turned a new leaf(assuming she was a cheat) to also check if she sought for help in terms of counseling and all of that

2.have you procured an abortion before?
a. how many times & were there complications in any of the procedures
b. did you go for checkup to ascertain that all was ok, I.e no complications
c. Will you be willing to go for a comprehensive checkup with me

3. Do you have any child or children, if yes
a. What was the circumstances that led to that birth
b. is the father of the child involved in the child's life or your life or will there be a future interference ?

4.have you ever contemplated suicide or have you attempted one before(my coz once dated a lady like that, so am taking no chances on that)

5. Do you have any health condition, eg HIV, Hepatitis, sickle cell, hypertension, ulcer, asthma etc if yes
a. How have you been managing it, what's your lifestyle like

I ask this cos I can't be with someone who is hypertensive & is still involved in smoking & drinking (for us to be together I have to see the willingness to change or at least a pattern of trying to live a healthy life)

There are more questions but we can peg it here, someone might say that I'm setting myself up for disappointment cos I will likely hear what I want to hear

That's why I will cite my caveat emptor, if you decieve me into marriage, the day I discover the heavy weight, that's the day the union will end

The answers to some of the questions throws a light into how the person has lived, the kind of crowd the person moved with, if the person has realized his or her mistakes, is willing to change etc

Cc:cococandy

cococandy:
I agree with you.

But for number two, I will limit the questions to "will you be willing to go for a check up with me?"
Reason being that most people might feel the questions are asked to judge them and even if they say no when the answer is yes, you then asking if they will be willing to go for a check makes it look like you didn't take their word for it.

So in my opinion, it's kinda pointless asking that question instead of stating that you require a test done before the marriage. Afterall you'd be willing to subject yourself to those fertility and STD tests too. It makes everything simpler. We just go for tests to ascertain that we are both okay and forget about uncomfortable questions.

My opinion.

Thanks, but if you don't give those answers, how then do I ascertain that you have changed!! I can't just take your word for it

It's not enough to pass all the health test, I need to know how you lived ur life, then check if you have made changes or open to changes & also if you realized ur mistakes etc

A lady who cheated in her previous relationship & sees nothing wrong in what she did all in the name if he wasn't always around, is a no no for me

Imagine she kept this from me, am I not walking into a time bomb

Imagine a lady who has been in 4 relationships & in those four relationships she cheated in all of them!! Isn't that a pattern? Isn't there a possibility that I will be her 5th victim?

But if she tells me & I study the circumstances around all of that & see that she has realized the errors of her ways, then I can forge ahead with her

But all those blanket statement of "honey, you didn't meet me as a virgin & I have a past bit all that matters is my love for you & I won't cheat on you" doesn't fly by me

A trial judge needs to hear the crime, needs to see the steps carried out for restitution & see the proof that the perpetrator is truly sorry & won't repeat it, based on this he can give a ruling

Those answers is for the sake of my mind, once the mind starts to play tricks on you then you know the relationship is over.

PS:I modified the original post, added some subsets of questions to no1 & a fresh question no 6

Sorry to butt in @harveyspec but those questions any sharp se x worker can answer and pass in flying colours.

1.2,haaa highest 3..the first one was beating me,the second one promised to marry me,the third had an accident and died.

C.no se x first one,we dated in primary school,the second one forced himself on me,I was engaged to the third and we had planned date for introduction when he died.

2.Abortioooonnn!!! Jeezos *making sign of the cross* God forbid!! I can never sin against the cross in that manner.Abortion is murder(street workers normally go to professional doctors for abortions so the chances of damage is minimal).
3. No ooo,no children.
4.Suicide?? Tueh God forbid! I'm a child of God,its a sin.
5. No health conditions,of course willing to go for health checks.As a runs girl,shed be doing tests regularly because her alhaji customers who like hitting it raw would always demand clean bill of health .. If she's out to get you,you will never win.

You'd have to be a special kind and understanding man before any chick gives you an answer deviating from the above.They know what you want to hear and will answer you accordingly.

The true way of finding out about someone's lifestyle is by asking their views on those topics when having normal discussions.

Any other way,they will become defensive and tell lies.
One thing I have found out is that the men that don't bother,normally get confessed to naturally especially when trust has been established.

Once u brandish ur pen and paper with these jamb questions,you will NOT get the truth.

By the way,how would you know she's had an abortion before if she's not told you?? Its normally the innocent girls who get preg by mistake,some even by pre cum that run to quacks and get botched d&c.The runs girls have experts on speed dial.


Over and out!

harveyspec:


I know you didn't ask me, but my question will go thus

Though I have to state it that it's quid pro quo, I'll be open & truthful to your questions & I expect same from you. I can't stomach lies

1. How many relationships have you been in?
a. In these relationships, did you cheat on ur partner?
b. where they healthy relationships, were you abused verbally or physically or sexually
c.were you sexually active in these relationship

The above questions is to help me ascertain if she is a damaged good & also to check if there was a pattern that repeated all through & to also see if she has turned a new leaf(assuming she was a cheat) to also check if she sought for help in terms of counseling and all of that

2.have you procured an abortion before?
a. how many times & were there complications in any of the procedures
b. did you go for checkup to ascertain that all was ok, I.e no complications
c. Will you be willing to go for a comprehensive checkup with me

3. Do you have any child or children, if yes
a. What was the circumstances that led to that birth
b. is the father of the child involved in the child's life or your life or will there be a future interference ?

4.have you ever contemplated suicide or have you attempted one before(my coz once dated a lady like that, so am taking no chances on that)

5. Do you have any health condition, eg HIV, Hepatitis, sickle cell, hypertension, ulcer, asthma etc if yes
a. How have you been managing it, what's your lifestyle like

I ask this cos I can't be with someone who is hypertensive & is still involved in smoking & drinking (for us to be together I have to see the willingness to change or at least a pattern of trying to live a healthy life)

There are more questions but we can peg it here, someone might say that I'm setting myself up for disappointment cos I will likely hear what I want to hear

That's why I will cite my caveat emptor, if you decieve me into marriage, the day I discover the heavy weight, that's the day the union will end

The answers to some of the questions throws a light into how the person has lived, the kind of crowd the person moved with, if the person has realized his or her mistakes, is willing to change etc

Cc:cococandy

I lied to my Ex about my virginity status and it hurt him so bad that he almost broke up with me...

I explained why I did it and apologised with the intervention of friends..

He said he'll only accept to it if I go for a comprehensive medical check-up, I told him it's not necessary because I've been celibate for 2years, I check my HIV status every 6months and I've never had an abortion...

He said the trust is broken and he needs medical proof...I was to test for HIV, Hepatitis B and C, several STIs, herpes and I was also to ascertain the competency of my womb because he according to him he was considering "Marriage"...

I accepted but with the option that he would do the same with the inclusion of "Sperm Count" and he has to pay because I don't have the money to waste (because I trust myself)....

I can never forget that day because the lab technicians even commented that about to wed couples don't screen theirselves like this...He had an emergency that day, so I gave them my sample and left....I was told to come back One week later for all the results...

The next day I asked him if he has submitted his sample and he said he is busy, I travelled for about a week and I was not even bothered about the result because I knew I am clean...I went for my results and I was told he was yet to complete the payment and he never submitted his sample...

I realised that he was not even sure of himself and he made them screen me like a guinea pig...He told my Sister and Friend that as far as I attended University of Port-Harcourt, I must be do all the tests that Port-Harcourt girls are Whores and uniport girls are Supreme whores and avoided me like a diseased animal....

Days later he came to my house with a box of chocolate and wine (His peace offering and I guessed he must have collected my results)...He did not say anything about the tests and pretend all was well...

Anyway, I asked him about his test and he said he does not need it and that he is clean blah blah blah...I just told him that I can't date him any more till I get his comprehensive medical report...And we've not spoken ever since (I sincerely don't know what he is hiding, MR CLEAN)...

Sorry for the long epistle...

Courtship is to study people.
To Know if you can live with them on a daily basis.
It is the courtship that will let you know if they are bad or good persons.
It is the courtship that will enable you see what you want to see.
no matter the pretense, if you're keen, you will see personality traits that will be warning signs.

That's why it is highly recommended to date someone for a while before settling down.

Questionnaires come with embellished answers.you can never really understand a person by the answers they give to your 'test' questions.

Even when they try to be honest, they can't give you the clear picture of how bad it really is. Psychologically, most humans tend to have an exaggerated sense of self. It is in fact important for our survival to see ourselves as better than we really are because it gives us the confidence to go ahead and do more in life because we believe we are 'good' enough and worthy to have whatever we want.

My point? Hardly will anyone tell you all the truth you need to know in order to get a clear image of their faults and bad sides. You will see it for yourself after time.

That's why our people say 'actions speak louder words.'
Leave the questions. They won't give you the info you need. Study the person. That's the info you need.

harveyspec:


Thanks, but if you don't give those answers, how then do I ascertain that you have changed!! I can't just take your word for it

It's not enough to pass all the health test, I need to know how you lived ur life, then check if you have made changes or open to changes & also if you realized ur mistakes etc

A lady who cheated in her previous relationship & sees nothing wrong in what she did all in the name if he wasn't always around, is a no no for me

Imagine she kept this from me, am I not walking into a time bomb

Imagine a lady who has been in 4 relationships & in those four relationships she cheated in all of them!! Isn't that a pattern? Isn't there a possibility that I will be her 5th victim?

But if she tells me & I study the circumstances around all of that & see that she has realized the errors of her ways, then I can forge ahead with her

But all those blanket statement of "honey, you didn't meet me as a virgin & I have a past bit all that matters is my love for you & I won't cheat on you" doesn't fly by me

A trial judge needs to hear the crime, needs to see the steps carried out for restitution & see the proof that the perpetrator is truly sorry & won't repeat it, based on this he can give a ruling

Those answers is for the sake of my mind, once the mind starts to play tricks on you then you know the relationship is over.

keppyy:



I lied to my Ex about my virginity status and it hurt him so bad that he almost broke up with me...

I explained why I did it and apologised with the intervention of friends..

He said he'll only accept to it if I go for a comprehensive medical check-up, I told him it's not necessary because I've been celibate for 2years, I check my HIV status every 6months and I've never had an abortion...

He said the trust is broken and he needs medical proof...I was to test for HIV, Hepatitis B and C, several STIs, herpes and I was also to ascertain the competency of my womb because he according to him he was considering "Marriage"...

I accepted but with the option that he would do the same with the inclusion of "Sperm Count" and he has to pay because I don't have the money to waste (because I trust myself)....

I can never forget that day because the lab technicians even commented that about to wed couples don't screen theirselves like this...He had an emergency that day, so I gave them my sample and left....I was told to come back One week later for all the results...

The next day I asked him if he has submitted his sample and he said he is busy, I travelled for about a week and I was not even bothered about the result because I knew I am clean...I went for my results and I was told he was yet to complete the payment and he never submitted his sample...

I realised that he was not even sure of himself and he made them screen me like a guinea pig...He told my Sister and Friend that as far as I attended University of Port-Harcourt, I must be do all the tests that Port-Harcourt girls are Whores and uniport girls are Supreme whores and avoided me like a diseased animal....

Days later he came to my house with a box of chocolate and wine (His peace offering and I guessed he must have collected my results)...He did not say anything about the tests and pretend all was well...

Anyway, I asked him about his test and he said he does not need it and that he is clean blah blah blah...I just told him that I can't date him any more till I get his comprehensive medical report...And we've not spoken ever since (I sincerely don't know what he is hiding, MR CLEAN)...

Sorry for the long epistle...

Giving you a very very big hug from here

Lol. Guys.
Many of them even find it hard to go for fertility test and possible solution after year of childlessness in marriage.
To them, nothing is ever wrong with them. All the fault must be from the woman.

I have an aunt who's almost fifty and never had a child. For long her husband's people kept tormenting her for their not having had a child saying she was barren even though he had an accident in his youth that made him require surgery in his man parts. It was after my mom kept pushing him to go for test (my aunt had done all the necessary tests, 90times and over)
He later agreed after much pressure. it was then discovered that he was shooting blanks. Blanks o. Not low sperm count or weak sperm cells. BLANKS.

Guys ehn
Some believe say because dem dey release something, they must be alright.

keppyy:



I lied to my Ex about my virginity status and it hurt him so bad that he almost broke up with me...

I explained why I did it and apologised with the intervention of friends..

He said he'll only accept to it if I go for a comprehensive medical check-up, I told him it's not necessary because I've been celibate for 2years, I check my HIV status every 6months and I've never had an abortion...

He said the trust is broken and he needs medical proof...I was to test for HIV, Hepatitis B and C, several STIs, herpes and I was also to ascertain the competency of my womb because he according to him he was considering "Marriage"...

I accepted but with the option that he would do the same with the inclusion of "Sperm Count" and he has to pay because I don't have the money to waste (because I trust myself)....

I can never forget that day because the lab technicians even commented that about to wed couples don't screen theirselves like this...He had an emergency that day, so I gave them my sample and left....I was told to come back One week later for all the results...

The next day I asked him if he has submitted his sample and he said he is busy, I travelled for about a week and I was not even bothered about the result because I knew I am clean...I went for my results and I was told he was yet to complete the payment and he never submitted his sample...

I realised that he was not even sure of himself and he made them screen me like a guinea pig...He told my Sister and Friend that as far as I attended University of Port-Harcourt, I must be do all the tests that Port-Harcourt girls are Whores and uniport girls are Supreme whores and avoided me like a diseased animal....

Days later he came to my house with a box of chocolate and wine (His peace offering and I guessed he must have collected my results)...He did not say anything about the tests and pretend all was well...

Anyway, I asked him about his test and he said he does not need it and that he is clean blah blah blah...I just told him that I can't date him any more till I get his comprehensive medical report...And we've not spoken ever since (I sincerely don't know what he is hiding, MR CLEAN)...

Sorry for the long epistle...

Jahblessme:
Sorry to butt in @harveyspec but those questions any sharp se x worker can answer and pass in flying colours.

1.2,haaa highest 3..the first one was beating me,the second one promised to marry me,the third had an accident and died.

C.no se x first one,we dated in primary school,the second one forced himself on me,I was engaged to the third and we had planned date for introduction when he died.

2.Abortioooonnn!!! Jeezos *making sign of the cross* God forbid!! I can never sin against the cross in that manner.Abortion is murder(street workers normally go to professional doctors for abortions so the chances of damage is minimal).
3. No ooo,no children.
4.Suicide?? Tueh God forbid! I'm a child of God,its a sin.
5. No health conditions,of course willing to go for health checks.As a runs girl,shed be doing tests regularly because her alhaji customers who like hitting it raw would always demand clean bill of health .. If she's out to get you,you will never win.

You'd have to be a special kind and understanding man before any chick gives you an answer deviating from the above.They know what you want to hear and will answer you accordingly.

The true way of finding out about someone's lifestyle is by asking their views on those topics when having normal discussions.

Any other way,they will become defensive and tell lies.
One thing I have found out is that the men that don't bother,normally get confessed to naturally especially when trust has been established.

Once u brandish ur pen and paper with these jamb questions,you will NOT get the truth.

By the way,how would you know she's had an abortion before if she's not told you?? Its normally the innocent girls who get preg by mistake,some even by pre cum that run to quacks and get botched d&c.The runs girls have experts on speed dial.


Over and out!

My cousin just read your comment and he said, you're making him SCARED of women!!!

You are REAL!

simiolu1:
As a teenager, I understood that every1 has a past whether good or bad. In fact, I see it a fundamental human right.
I have mine too and in every relationship, I make my partner always understand that their past would not be an issue if it does not interfere with our relationship and future.
With this mindset, my partners have been able to open up to me and I've heard things that would make most ears tingle!
I've once dated a mother of twins (in fact she was my first gf), a girlfriend once admitted to being in a lesbian relationship etc. But the one that suprised me most was a girl who once told me she was a virgin (she told me of her own volition; I never ask if a girl is a virgin or not cos I know that time would tell).
Later on when we were about to start dating, she told me she wasn't a virgin but that she's been abstaining from sex. When things got serious, she told me that once I hav sex with her, she won't be able to control her urges. This made me travel from Ogbomoso to Oyo every week back then. One night while in my arms, she opened up to me and delved into her past relationships, how she became a sex addict, got pregnant for her ex-bf and did an abortion.
What I've learnt is that ladies are calculative. They ain't stupid. If they tell you about their past, it's a test. They do so cos they trust that you'll keep their secret. On the guys part, you must be mature enough to handle a relationship and all the issues and baggages that come with one. If you are not, you have no business being in a relationship.
A friend of mine told me about the sex life of his current relationship. He, the girl and I attend the same church and cos my friend is a "bro" I just assumed they weren't shaggin. My friend expressed his suprise to me bout the different sexx styles this lady has been showing him in d bedroom and asked me where she learnt them from. I was like are you a learner?

All these I didn't know of. How did you manage to keep it from me, my guy?

Bukatyne, I must confess that you inspired me to say that (I was too drunk in love)...thank you

Cococandy, hmmmmmmmmmmm....I think he is just scared of the possibility of a bad result.

Is you aunt still with her husband?

keppyy:
Bukatyne, I must confess that you inspired me to say that (I was too drunk in love)...thank you

Cococandy, hmmmmmmmmmmm....I think he is just scared of the possibility of a bad result.

Is you aunt still with her husband?

she is. Maybe they will adopt. That one concern them for there.

@keppyy
You've suffered o.Pele!!
Hope you've learnt your lessons.
Before I married,once any guy asked me about my 'vaginity' status,I'd log off.
I would tell them its none of their biz.Many of these guys that asked me had these long line of questions I'd have to pass before 'we' proceed into a relationship.
Fortunately for me,I was very very self confident then thanks to my granny.She told me men are every where and I should never ever enter a relationship where I didn't have the upper hand.That guided me well,any sme sme and you are out,no time for rubbish.

Met my hubby,he never asked me any of these foolish questions..we disclosed a lot to each other in the course of the relationship but no have u had abortion and how many se x partners gist.We had the same belief that of course we are both decent and responsible people and what matters is from here on.We are now exclusive so no messing up.

Along the line of course I got all the info I wanted and he got his plus complete blood tests..wouldn't have asked for sp ERM count cos if I love someone I'm down with them fertile or no.

The important thing is that I didn't feel pressured, I didn't feel I had to say anything..we got so comfy with each other years on and would gist about who's brest he pressed and who's nyash I squeezed..I know for one that he'd never judge me and I tried to be the same for him.

Just be faithful to me and let's love each other.Daz all.

Keppyy had to laugh at your cousin.. . No need to be scared.Good non judgey guys normally get nice girls.Its all these by force by fire guys that end up with reformed ashhhyyy

pickabeau1:
If your 'mother' in Israel had said something different then you will not be her daughter Na



Brothers beware

Deception lives and breathes in the church
If these are the kind of people preaching ideology in d church you are best looking for a babe in the club

Women in d church are ready to do anything just to keep and stay in their deceptive marriages

I won't be surprised if they are also fetish and consult occult

Beware..

I think the problem in Christendom arose wen ppl started 'interpreting' God's Word according to their own understanding.
Wen Jesus said you have to be like these lil kids to see d kingdom, it also applies to the way we take God's word...verbatim, no addition nor subtraction.

Can't believe a 'woman of God' actually said that.

The Bible is there as a guide to us....

The rest is left to us

@ keppyy,

Your story just proved one thing I have said several times in this forum. When they say a couple should be honest, they mean the woman should be honest. When the say a couple should go for fertility test, they mean the woman should go for fertility test because in our part of the world and in their eyes, only a woman has problems.

keppyy:
Bukatyne, I must confess that you inspired me to say that (I was too drunk in love)...thank you

Cococandy, hmmmmmmmmmmm....I think he is just scared of the possibility of a bad result.

Is you aunt still with her husband?

You are welcome dear.

I am just watching a movie now

Lover boy left a girl in Naija to go to England for better life and bring lover girl over...

He left his Uncle place due to maltreatment of his wife and started living with a benefactor.., (a single girl.. I know right )

This benefactor tried extremely hard to seduce him but he resisted... he truly loved his Naija girl.

The benefactor was so desperate that she actually drugged him at a party to sleep with him which she succeeded....

Should he tell his girl when she comes back?

If it were the girl, should she tell the guy?

The guy was truly truly innocent

babygirlfl:
@ keppyy,

Your story just proved one thing I have said several times in this forum. When they say a couple should be honest, they mean the woman should be honest. When the say a couple should go for fertility test, they mean the woman should go for fertility test because in our part of the world and in their eyes, only a woman has problems.

You have not read that different rules for men and women?

dBard:



I think the problem in Christendom arose wen ppl started 'interpreting' God's Word according to their own understanding.
Wen Jesus said you have to be like these lil kids to see d kingdom, it also applies to the way we take God's word...verbatim, no addition nor subtraction.

Can't believe a 'woman of God' actually said that.

The Bible is there as a guide to us....

The rest is left to us

So you noticed?.....


Many people twisting things to justify their human wisdom

To be honest, if I were irresponsible I would do it without any shame. If I were a prostitute, I'll be the proudest pros.titute on earth. I don't rate men that much to be hiding my past, who them be to be spending energies protecting a past? If he doesn't like it, he should go and die. A partner holding sensitive info to our relationship is only digger his own grave. Don't steal my basic human right to decide whether I choose to leave the relationship or not. It's left for me to accept your past or not. It's my human right. You can't hold people to ransom to accept you for the mistakes you made. There are consequences for the actions we take in life. I am very accepting of consequences when I've done wrong. What I've found out is that people want to do the crime but not the time. I must have lost the memo on this do or die affair of staying married when there are questionable principles.
It's no one's fault if a woman chooses to take back a cheating husband and when she cheats, he doesn't reciprocate the action of forgiveness. It is his choice not to be with a cheating wife, so it is her choice to stay with a cheating husband. Nobody told any woman not to have standards for her life.

Howeverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, I do understand how the Nigerian environment is and how we view female sexuality. So women carry on. You are only protecting yourself from a two faced society, who cannot handle the truth that women are also sexu.al beings.

Jahblessme:
Sorry to butt in @harveyspec but those questions any sharp se x worker can answer and pass in flying colours.

1.2,haaa highest 3..the first one was beating me,the second one promised to marry me,the third had an accident and died.

C.no se x first one,we dated in primary school,the second one forced himself on me,I was engaged to the third and we had planned date for introduction when he died.

2.Abortioooonnn!!! Jeezos *making sign of the cross* God forbid!! I can never sin against the cross in that manner.Abortion is murder(street workers normally go to professional doctors for abortions so the chances of damage is minimal).
3. No ooo,no children.
4.Suicide?? Tueh God forbid! I'm a child of God,its a sin.
5. No health conditions,of course willing to go for health checks.As a runs girl,shed be doing tests regularly because her alhaji customers who like hitting it raw would always demand clean bill of health .. If she's out to get you,you will never win.

You'd have to be a special kind and understanding man before any chick gives you an answer deviating from the above.They know what you want to hear and will answer you accordingly.

The true way of finding out about someone's lifestyle is by asking their views on those topics when having normal discussions.

Any other way,they will become defensive and tell lies.
One thing I have found out is that the men that don't bother,normally get confessed to naturally especially when trust has been established.

Once u brandish ur pen and paper with these jamb questions,you will NOT get the truth.

By the way,how would you know she's had an abortion before if she's not told you?? Its normally the innocent girls who get preg by mistake,some even by pre cum that run to quacks and get botched d&c.The runs girls have experts on speed dial.


Over and out!

If you give me those answers, you jam rock cos by the time I start askinv you follow up questions on those answers, you yourself go know say the truth will be the best!!

Cos you will be f
Anybody that asks those questions in a Q&A style will definitely get the wrong answers!!

She might even get angry & storm out

Those questions ought to asked during normal convo as u said & can be asked over a period of months

It's not something you ask once

Heck, you might tell me you had an abortion & I will simply acknowledge

Another day I will add another follow up question in a relaxed mood.

Once a while I might bring it up again, just to check of your answers will match

The person must not feel interrogated, hence you loose out neither must she get the whiff that you want to judge her

It also has to be a committed relationship heading to marriage. You can't just be my friend or let's see how it goes relationship & be asking me all these questions

babygirlfl:
@ keppyy,
Your story just proved one thing I have said several times in this forum. When they say a couple should be honest, they mean the woman should be honest. When the say a couple should go for fertility test, they mean the woman should go for fertility test because in our part of the world and in their eyes, only a woman has problems.

100% true.Meanwhile a huge percentage are carrying dead sp erm around. If your partner demands for all them fertility tests,join hands with him and walk in to the lab together and you must see the sp erm sample koro koro. Hsg to check patency of the tubes is quite painful,why in heavens name would anyone go through that for a man they're not married to? Crazy stuff.

Another point to note is that doctors are bound by the confidientiality clause,they should never ever speak of your health issues,tests and results to even your husband unless you give your permission for them to.You can sue if this is breached.

keppyy:



I lied to my Ex about my virginity status and it hurt him so bad that he almost broke up with me...

I explained why I did it and apologised with the intervention of friends..

He said he'll only accept to it if I go for a comprehensive medical check-up, I told him it's not necessary because I've been celibate for 2years, I check my HIV status every 6months and I've never had an abortion...

He said the trust is broken and he needs medical proof...I was to test for HIV, Hepatitis B and C, several STIs, herpes and I was also to ascertain the competency of my womb because he according to him he was considering "Marriage"...

I accepted but with the option that he would do the same with the inclusion of "Sperm Count" and he has to pay because I don't have the money to waste (because I trust myself)....

I can never forget that day because the lab technicians even commented that about to wed couples don't screen theirselves like this...He had an emergency that day, so I gave them my sample and left....I was told to come back One week later for all the results...

The next day I asked him if he has submitted his sample and he said he is busy, I travelled for about a week and I was not even bothered about the result because I knew I am clean...I went for my results and I was told he was yet to complete the payment and he never submitted his sample...

I realised that he was not even sure of himself and he made them screen me like a guinea pig...He told my Sister and Friend that as far as I attended University of Port-Harcourt, I must be do all the tests that Port-Harcourt girls are Whores and uniport girls are Supreme whores and avoided me like a diseased animal....

Days later he came to my house with a box of chocolate and wine (His peace offering and I guessed he must have collected my results)...He did not say anything about the tests and pretend all was well...

Anyway, I asked him about his test and he said he does not need it and that he is clean blah blah blah...I just told him that I can't date him any more till I get his comprehensive medical report...And we've not spoken ever since (I sincerely don't know what he is hiding, MR CLEAN)...

Sorry for the long epistle...

You see how you got magar-ed?
Of course I know you are wiser now
You should know how to differentiate psychos from regular folks

Any man ready to subject a girl to lab tests and scans to determine her fitness to marry must also be subjected to similar tests to determine his fitness.
42% of sterility and barrenness in a study in Nigeria was the man's fault
If you fear I may not have kids for you,I should also fear you don't have what it takes

@harveyspec
If I may add,I would never answer to such badgering as in every day q & a ie if it were me.I wonder how you'll ask ??
Ehee baby I forgot..u don do abortion before? Then in 2 weeks .. Ehee baby so that abortion ehh how many times? Then in a month ..ahhh did you say you had 2 bf?? Come onn.
I don't mean those answers will follow that exact format but you will find that the general formula will be like that.

Once a sharp girl knows what you seek she will answer you accordingly.If you like ask it over 10 years.

A practised liar will always be ready.

One other thing is that a judgey person will always sound judgey no matter how hard they try to hide it.

Jahblessme:
@harveyspec
If I may add,I would never answer to such badgering as in every day q & a ie if it were me.I wonder how you'll ask ??
Ehee baby I forgot..u don do abortion before? Then in 2 weeks .. Ehee baby so that abortion ehh how many times? Then in a month ..ahhh did you say you had 2 bf?? Come onn.
I don't mean those answers will follow that exact format but you will find that the general formula will be like that.

Once a sharp girl knows what you seek she will answer you accordingly.If you like ask it over 10 years.

A practised liar will always be ready.

One other thing is that a judgey person will always sound judgey no matter how hard they try to hide it.

Infact any man that asks me those questions won't see me anymore
I will tell you to get lost
He would have given himself away as a psycho and any intelligent lady would know he is a disaster waiting to happen

Jahblessme:


100% true.Meanwhile a huge percentage are carrying dead sp erm around. If your partner demands for all them fertility tests,join hands with him and walk in to the lab together and you must see the sp erm sample koro koro. Hsg to check patency of the tubes is quite painful,why in heavens name would anyone go through that for a man they're not married to? Crazy stuff.

Another point to note is that doctors are bound by the confidientiality clause,they should never ever speak of your health issues,tests and results to even your husband unless you give your permission for them to.You can sue if this is breached.

No, it was not a breach of confidentiality...(I don't want to spill more that this because my real time "friends" are reading this)...and I don't want them to identify the person.

keppyy:


No, it was not a breach of confidentiality...(I don't want to spill more that this because my real time "friends" are reading this)...and I don't want them to identify the person.

Okayy

Jahblessme:


100% true.Meanwhile a huge percentage are carrying dead sp erm around. If your partner demands for all them fertility tests,join hands with him and walk in to the lab together and you must see the sp erm sample koro koro. Hsg to check patency of the tubes is quite painful,why in heavens name would anyone go through that for a man they're not married to? Crazy stuff.

Another point to note is that doctors are bound by the confidientiality clause,they should never ever speak of your health issues,tests and results to even your husband unless you give your permission for them to.You can sue if this is breached.

Spermatozoa that had been RIP-ed Tay Tay
I will watch you Masturbate and put the thing inside a cup to hand over to them
Then they scan you before me for undescended testes and hydrocele in your balls
These tests cannot be for me alone
As I am testing,you kwa you are testing
God help you if you don't check out OK after coercing me to useless scrutiny,every girl in that geopolitical region will hear your story