Thirty-one-year-old Juliet Arinze has
noticed an inexplicable coldness from
her husband, Victor, for the last two
months and made attempts to find out
what the trouble was but all she has
got is “nothing.”
Victor, who works with an oil servicing
company in Port Harcourt, Rivers State,
is always away from home.
“The two weeks on, two weeks off
rotational shift system they do is not
really the problem. The problem is that
lately, anytime he comes home, he is
distant,” Juliet told our correspondent.
“Money keeps coming, but it is like my
husband is slipping away from my
hands everyday and I don’t know
why.”
But Juliet said she did not fold her
arms. She resorted to investigating the
activities of her husband through his
cell phone anytime he was at home.
Her findings further confirmed her
greatest fear.
She said, “There is no doubt my
husband is having an affair. The
problem is that the last message I read
on his phone shows the lady already
has a baby for him.
“He doesn’t even bother deleting her
messages anymore! In the exchanges
they had, he was asking about how a
baby was doing and the woman
replied ‘we both miss you.’ My
husband has continued to tell me that
there is no problem so, I don’t want to
push him away by accusing him
without evidence.”
Juliet and Victor got married in 2008
and have three children. They have
both been given pseudo names in this
report.
Juliet, who volunteered to tell her story
on the condition that her name and
that of her husband be concealed,
contacted our correspondent later and
confirmed that indeed, her husband
had a love-child.
How did she do it?
From a booklet of phone codes which
she bought in traffic in Port Harcourt,
she learnt she could listen to phone
calls made on her husband’s phone.
She could not resist the temptation.
“From the booklet, I learnt I could
monitor his calls through call divert but
there is no way he won’t know. A
friend later introduced me to an IT
expert who installed something on my
phone.
“Now, anytime his phone rings, mine
vibrates and I monitor his calls. I nearly
died when I learnt from his calls that
he already had a six-month-old baby
with this lady in question.”
Juliet said she had decided to take her
findings to her pastor to resolve the
issue.
Technology has advanced and while
hackers continue to infiltrate systems
across the world for money, lovers,
husbands and wives on the other
hand, are resorting to tapping and
hacking mobile devices to catch their
unfaithful partners.
Like Juliet, Mr. Peter Ekundayo, sought
help from technology when he
suspected that his wife, Funmi, was
having an affair.
After a short lesson from an IT expert,
Ekundayo activated a call monitoring
feature on his wife’s phone and caught
her red-handed while discussing a
rendezvous plan in a hotel with a
neighbour she was having an affair
with.
Ekundayo, who approached the
Customary Court, Ojo, Lagos, for the
dissolution of his marriage, told the
court that he wanted to take his own
life when he heard the discussion his
wife had with a neighbour she was
allegedly cavorting with at their Iyana-
Ishashi home in Ojo area of Lagos.
While on the trail of the so-called IT
experts who make a living out of
assisting people to monitor their
lovers, our correspondent visited the
Computer Village in Ikeja, Lagos, the
centre of all things technology in
Lagos, to find out that this trend has
become even more common than
many would think.
According to Chuks, one of the young
men our correspondent spoke with,
who combines phone repair with
selling cheat codes at the Computer
Village, it is an open secret people are
not likely to share willingly.
“If you come here and ask for a code
that would enable you to listen to
someone’s phone calls, it is either we
give you the code for call divert or
other codes that don’t work. But if you
can get someone to trust you and you
pay well, then it is no problem, we do
it a lot. We have IT boys whom we pay
here to do it for us since all of us do
not have the expertise,” he said.
Chuks volunteered to take our
correspondent to one of such experts,
a graduate of Economics who said he
only learnt about programming when
he could not get a job. Of course, he
refused to have his name published.
“Don’t be deceived by those who tell
you about one code or another that
could let one listen to another person’s
calls. Most of them are frauds, you
need experts like us to do the job. I
can do it for you if you have someone
you want to monitor,” he boasted. The
‘expert,’ however, did not forget to
chip in an advice, “My brother, it is not
worth it though. If a woman cheats on
you, cheat on her in return; tit for tat.”
Asked if he knew whether it was
possible to hack and read the text
messages on someone else’s phone,
he said he has not seen such thing
before.
For his services, this ‘expert’ said he
would charge N10,000. But Chuks later
told our correspondent he could get it
done at a cheaper rate.
‘More harm than good’
The issue of hacking of phone,
according to experts, is a symptom of
a larger problem – the breakdown of
the fabric of trust which is supposed to
hold together every form of
relationship, whether platonic or
romantic.
Three things are
responsible for this trend; lack of trust,
lack of openness and desperation.
When lack of trust builds up in a
relationship, at a certain stage, it leads
to desperation.
“There is more distrust than in the
past now, simply because technology
makes it so easy for people to keep
secrets. In the past, you could not
speak with a girl without her father
knowing. Now, you chat with her
through text messaging even beside
her father. But we cannot blame
technology because it is like a sword, it
can help and harm.
“I would not think twice about hacking
my husband’s phone if I strongly
suspect he is lying and cheating on me
in a way that could destroy our home,”
Opeyemi Aluko told our correspondent,
when asked if she would consider such
an action.
Even though Aluko explained that her
husband of four years does not cheat,
her opinion was that “you cannot put
anything past men. Men would always
be men.”
Thirty-two-year-old Seyi Adamolekun, a
laundromat operator, said she once
considered monitoring her husband’s
calls in their second year of marriage.
“I kept seeing different messages from
other women on his phone while he
assured me he had nothing to do with
them. We started having problems
when I complained to his parents and
they supported him, saying I was
making a mountain out of a molehill.
“I was desperate and needed evidence
to show that I was not just being
paranoid. But a friend advised against
it. Looking back now, I’m glad I did not
take that step. Maybe we won’t be
together today. We are fine now.”
A young man, Patrick Nelson explained
that even though he could monitor his
partner’s calls, he would not do it out
of jealousy.
“I am not married yet but I know I am
not a cheat. If it happens that I have a
strong suspicion that my partner is
cheating, I would monitor her calls just
to get evidence to chase her away.
“A cheating woman can poison you. I
would do it for my own safety, not
because of mere jealousy.”
Infidelity and ‘celeb’ marriages
Another marriage counsellor, Mrs. Sade
Toyin-Kehinde, told our correspondent
that trust is flying out of the window in
marriages in the society because
issues are handled in “wishy-washy
manner.”
Having expressed also that there is far
more mistrust in marriages nowadays
than in the past, Toyin-Kehinde said
secrets always destroy marriages and
relationships.
Accusation and counter-accusations of
infidelity by celebrity couples and
individuals, especially in the
entertainment industry in the last five
years, highlight the issue of mistrust
and accusations of infidelity which are
upending many marriages in the
country.
The reason for the short shelf-life of
celebrity marriages in Nigeria seems to
revolve around one single theme,
infidelity and mistrust.
Section 7 of the Cyber Crime Law
2013, states, “Any person, who
intentionally and without authorisation
or in excess of authority, intercepts by
technical means, transmissions of non-
public computer data, content data or
traffic data, including electromagnetic
emissions or signals from a computer,
computer system or network carrying
or emitting signals, to or from a
computer, computer system or
connected system or network; commits
an offence and liable on conviction to
imprisonment for a term of not less
than two years or to a fine of not less
than N5,000,000.00 or to both fine
and imprisonment.”

Wow...I didn't think these things really do work.

Frankly speaking, I dnt think it's a good idea for couple to be tapping each other line.

Tapping tins

Not a good idea,,coz many will die of cardiac arrest,,,beta if u don't monitor each other movements and calls..Seriously,,,yy is it difficult to trust each other in relationship ds days it's appalling,,,i blame the men coz women tend to be more submissive in marriages coz of children and oda factors..Men please change....

ramdris:
Frankly speaking, I dnt think it's a good idea for couple to be tapping each other line.

See pot calling kettle........

subbieD:




See pot calling kettle........

.

hmmmmmmm......





diz case toh badt gan....









*walks out of thread*