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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. (29717 Views)
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When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 8:23pm On Jul 20, 2015 |
THE EX SYNDROME... Do you know that one of the biggest mistakes we make as individuals that easily destroys our courtship and marriages emanates from the act of comparison which is as a result of the ex factor? Do you know that every detail of our ex(es) is subliminally registered in a well guarded part of our brains? This is why sometimes,we just can't help having flashes of an ex even when we never intended. Many people find it hard to settle down with a new person because they kept comparing that person with someone or people they have dated in the past and even when the ex has no single clue. This act keeps destroying your present affair until the relationship finally collapses and the circle begins again with a new person. We must understand that any new person that walks into your life has a totally different make up biologically, physically,mentally,emotionally,sexually,spiritually,ideologically and on and on so you must learn to take people for who they are and never ever try to compare them with your ex because this terrible act has led to the collapse of many potentially blissful and purposeful union. In-fact,it has become a norm that we always want to get a new person that will surpass an ex in beauty or status just to make the ex jealous of the fact that we got a "better choice" and many have wasted ample time due to this funny mindset. As a guy you should not expect Catherine your new love to be as Fluent as Ada,as energetic and sexy as Bimbo,to be excellent in the kitchen as Jessica or be as curvy as Mariam who seem to be the ladies you have dated in the past.You just can't find all the good virtues you love in your ex(es) in your new woman,NEVER. And as a lady you can't stop hoping that your new guy can be as cute,tall and adorable as Peter,as rich and generous as Tade or sexually powerful and endowed as James,NO WAY,life does not work that way. If we all keep looking for the conglomerate of good virtues seen in our past partners in our new partner then we just might realize too late that we are living in fool's paradise. We must learn to delete every file of all the past partners,format our brain to erase every memory of our past partners and take the new partner as a fresh person and assume we have never met anyone else before. This is the only way we can truly have a healthy and fulfilling affair with the new person in our life and it will prevent us from fantasizing about an ex while sitting or sleeping next to another. GOD help us. 44 Likes 2 Shares
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Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by sinaj(f): 8:26pm On Jul 20, 2015 |
*sneeze* ok |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Cutehector(m): 8:38pm On Jul 20, 2015 |
sinaj:takes cover.... 3 Likes |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by meimoks(f): 8:40pm On Jul 20, 2015 |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by wristbangle: 8:43pm On Jul 20, 2015 |
Excellent write up bro. Old flames re kindled atimes but it's left for who ever is the culprit to curb the memory away. 6 Likes |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 8:47pm On Jul 20, 2015 |
wristbangle: Very very true. |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 9:02pm On Jul 20, 2015 |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 5:05pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
hos4x:Space bookers association of nairaland. |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 5:05pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
hos4x:Space bookers association of nairaland. |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 5:08pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
wristbangle: Thanks bro |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Nobody: 5:30pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
Actually i concur, most times females find it hard to get over an ex than guys, especially if the breakup was based on a big hindrance, Death, genotype issue, or anything. Ex does play a big factor and that's quite bad. 5 Likes |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 5:48pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
pcguru1: The worst part is in the area of sex. God forbid i make love to my wife and she is fantacizing about an ex.That is the height of it. 3 Likes |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Nobody: 5:50pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
The Ex syndrome 1 Like |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by snakebeat: 5:56pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
pcguru1:U're right... |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 6:02pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
Manuelson: One area that may be a big problem for me is good food. My ex can perform magic in the kitchen and i fear that if i have a new chic that lacks this expertise it will take the grace of God for me to adjust. Nevertheless i must be prepared to welcome even the worst cook as long as she is willing to learn. 2 Likes |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Omotayor123(f): 6:05pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
Ex Factor.... Lol. True talk though... More reason why I hate having an Ex |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 6:17pm On Aug 02, 2015 |
Omotayor123: Yes o.Most of us have a crazy attachment with our ex or exes and until we let go,it will always affect our present affair. Some guys are used to a busty ex some a bootilicious ex while some a very adorable ex and a lady starts looking for a new guy who will be cuter while the guy is looking for a more sexy new chic. The crazy case of Nikky minaj and Safaree.smh 2 Likes |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 11:24pm On Aug 03, 2015 |
Manuelson: A terrible trap we must try to get out from. 1 Like |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Toks2008(m): 2:24pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
at: Yeah. |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by shumuel(m): 6:58pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
It only means she still wants you back. |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by skywalker240(m): 6:58pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
nice write up |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by hakeem4(m): 7:13pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by ladyF(f): 7:13pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
Good riddance to bad rubbish. As the relationship is ending, so are the memories. No time to be thinking about X It's [size=15pt]LadyF[/size] again 3 Likes |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by allanphash7(m): 7:14pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
Hmm 7 Likes
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Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by kennyman2000(m): 7:16pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
Hmmmm |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by isrealisaac: 7:16pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by tommychow(m): 7:16pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
You're so right. It's highly advised to clear your mind and know the current person is a different person from your exes. However, you can use past relationships to know where you messed up, use it to improve and strengthen yourself mentally and emotionally for the tedious ride called "marriage". Everyone partner you have is an opportunity to learn, understand and be wiser in rough situations. "Funmi did this to me back then and I acted like this, let me do it differently with Ada and see", "Tony was bad at sex like Chike is now, and I handled it horribly then. I'll be more considerate this time." etc. Use your past relationships as guidelines, don't just see them as ways to destructively criticize your present partner like you're perfect. "My Ex was thicker and longer than you" SO WHAT?! Everyone is different, move on. 1 Like |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by thefakestan: 7:17pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
What is Ex? Extension? External Extra Exam Etc? ThefakeStan |
Re: When your Ex keeps destroying your present affair. by Nobody: 7:18pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
A thread from 2015? Making FP? Today must be a slow news day 2 Likes |
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