*Toyinrayo:

How was the one you went to?

Sanitary?
Food?
Bathroom?
Education?
etc

all of the above LOL

the ones (attended 3) i went were actually good. the quality of their teaching, their food and facilities were awesome though they might have changed (either more good or by been worse) by now. so i think they are some good ones but you just have to search and shine ya shines

~Sissy~:

all of the above LOL

the ones (attended 3) i went were actually good. the quality of their teaching, their food and facilities were awesome though they might have changed (either more good or by been worse) by now. so i think they are some good ones but you just have to search and shine ya shines

I want the one wey my kid no go learn bad typical naija girl habit. No offense to my sistas, but I don hear too much.

And I'm not sending him/her over there to enjoy

Actually, my aunt sent my cousin to BabCock in Naija . . . , the dude trashed his/his brothers cars here and went home to dey gbadun himself. I'm like WDH? Which kain punishment be that

*Toyinrayo:

I want the one wey my kid no go learn bad typical naija girl habit. No offense to my sistas, but I don hear too much.

And I'm not sending him/her over there to enjoy 

Actually, my aunt sent my cousin to BabCock in Naija . . . , the dude trashed his/his brothers cars here and went home to dey gbadun himself. I'm like WDH? Which kain punishment be that 

heheehe

during my good ol' days there were many parents in the U.S who brought back their kids back home to boarding school we had many of them in my school, so they can get 9ja style discipline not this yeye discipline americans dey pet their child. hit any of them and the next knock you will hear on your door is child services

~Sissy~:

heheehe

during my good ol' days there were many parents in the U.S who brought back their kids back home to boarding school we had many of them in my school, so they can get 9ja style discipline not this yeye discipline americans dey pet their child. hit any of them and the next knock you will hear on your door is child services

Abi o. . . but my cousin changed actually.
He went from Americanized to Nigerialized.
Everytime we talk, he's like "Toyin, you've Americanized. Why do you sound like that?".
I'm like no, it's because you're over there.
He loves everything Nigerian and gets to travel around.
What an unfair punishment.
Because of him, I begged my mom to send me to same school, she wa slike, No

My cousin changed oooooo. He shaved his afro and stopped his nonsense.
I'm so proud of him, I told him

I guess it might work.
But to deal with my kid being miles away?
Nooooo

yea, the long distance is sometimes hard to deal with especially at that initial departure but this why there are phones and the internet (or ones with webcam) they at least help with the loneliness unlike before

i mean i would consider it and try to cope with the loneliness with phone/ internet communication knowing that him/her is not going to be there for forever. it is worth the loneliness in my opinion. my mom's brother sent his two little kids one was 3 and the other 1 to 9ja to stay with his wife's mom and they are really doing awesome. all grownup now and be will coming back later in this year.

~Sissy~:

yea, the long distance is sometimes hard to deal with especially at that initial departure but this why there are phones and the internet (or ones with webcam) they at least help with the loneliness unlike before

i mean i would consider it and try to cope with the loneliness with phone/ internet communication knowing that him/her is not going to be there for forever. it is worth the loneliness in my opinion. my mom's brother sent his two little kids one was 3 and the other 1 to 9ja to stay with his wife's mom and they are really doing awesome. all grownup now and be will coming back later in this year.

No, I can't.

*Toyinrayo:

No, I can't.

maybe you will have a change of mind later

there is still hope * _{keeping fingers crossed}*

~Sissy~:

maybe you will have a change of mind later

there is still hope * _{keeping fingers crossed}*

dnt wish me bad thing.

I dnt hope that any of my kids are [b]that [/b]bad enough to be sent home

but you still go on holidays?

*Toyinrayo:

dnt wish me bad thing.

I dnt hope that any of my kids are [b]that [/b]bad enough to be sent home

no, oo i cant wish u bad luck nah , . with your skills and attitudes i don't think any of each of ur child will need a any hard discipline. cox they will learn good manners 4rom their mama . just saying encase som1 u knw needs the help

Holidays are not enough. I want to be there, to see and KNOW that they're alright.

I want to be able to hear their feet stamping on the floor while I'm sleeping.

I want to pass by their rooms and watch them sleeping. I want to be the one to take them shopping.

I do not want to hear their voice over the phone, missing them and wishing they were with me.

I know what am dealing with right now, can't do that with my kids

~Sissy~:

no, oo i cant wish u bad luck nah , . with your skills and attitudes i don't think any of each of ur child will need a any hard discipline. cox they will learn good manners 4rom their mama . just saying encase som1 u knw needs the help

You're not serious.

I KNOW I'll need help because I will not have that much patience for no stubborn kids.

*Toyinrayo:

Holidays is not enough. I want to be there, to see that and KNOW that they're alright.

I want to be able to hear their feet stamping on the floor while I'm sleeping.

I want to pass by their room and watch them sleeping. I want to be the one to take them shopping.

I do not want to hear thier voice over the phone, missing them and wishing they were with me.

awww . . . how nice * _{crying n leaves to get Kleenex tissue}* those r touching

yea, those types of discipline methods wouldn't work for you, cox u want those connection with them which is good

*Toyinrayo:


I KNOW I'll need help because I will not have that much patience for no stubborn kids.

yes oo, no matter how one think they know about parenting it is never easy and they will always need help. it takes a village to raise a child

*Toyinrayo:


I know what am dealing with right now, can't do that with my kids
You're not serious.

I KNOW I'll need help because I will not have that much patience for no stubborn kids.

Wow, toyinrayo you are confusing me, one minute i thought you have already giving birth to a wonderful baby, the next minute you are talking in 3rd person perspective.
Does that mean you are just merely helping someone take care of their children or something (I am against calling them kids, cus kids is name for baby goats).

By the way am still trying to know my cheer leading dress size (just kidding), frankly though am hopeless with things like that shirt or dress or trouser sizes. I tend to visually guage my clothes for body fitting.

~Sissy~:

awww . . . how nice * _{crying n leaves to get Kleenex tissue}* those r touching

yea, those types of discipline methods wouldn't work for you, cox u want those connection with them which is good

yes oo, no matter how one think they know about parenting it is never easy and they will always need help. it takes a village to raise a child

Lol, na facts
I loved spending the time I could with my mom. So I know how they might feel to not have their mother there

No2Atheism:

Wow, toyinrayo you are confusing me, one minute i thought you have already giving birth to a wonderful baby, the next minute you are talking in 3rd person perspective.
Does that mean you are just merely helping someone take care of their children or something (I am against calling them kids, cus kids is name for baby goats).

By the way am still trying to know my cheer leading dress size (just kidding), frankly though am hopeless with things like that shirt or dress or trouser sizes. I tend to visually guage my clothes for body fitting.

God help me, I dare not have one out of wedlock

Help? I call it care

Size small will do

*Toyinrayo:

Lol, na facts
I loved spending the time I could with my mom. So I know how they might feel to not have their mother there

God help me, I dare not have one out of wedlock

Help? I call it care

Size small will do

Now dats a self respecting Sister, wish a few minority of women were like u , able and strong enough to slap senses into the head of any man that would try to both  fatally hump and normally hump them before marriage,

As for me, am all for lovey dovey but no touching before marriage,

No2Atheism:

Now dats a self respecting Sister, wish a few minority of women were like u , able and strong enough to slap senses into the head of any man that would try to both fatally hump and normally hump them before marriage,

As for me, am all for lovey dovey but no touching before marriage,

I said I wouldn't have a baby out of wedlock o.

Not that I'm humping or being humped sha

How do you dress your kid so he/she won't grow up looking a hot mess?

I noticed that some parents don't care about what their kids walk out in, therefore it becomes a habit for them to dress "trashy".

I mean, saggin pants, unkempt hair etc. . ,

start as early as you can and teach them decent dressing esp. 'em gals. whenever they wear something that you think is inappropriate you have to correct them. my mom was strict about dressing decent, her look only will give you chills. for her it is either you dress decent or you stay at home. also it is better to start when they are still tweens and instill that pattern in them than when they are full grown teenagers then it is hard to dictate for them what they wear.

and also if you are the one going to buy them the cloths you are in charge to make sure you and/or them make pick the decent ones.

~Sissy~:

start as early as you can and teach them decent dressing esp. 'em gals. whenever they wear something that you think is inappropriate you have to correct them. my mom was strict about dressing decent, her look only will give you chills. for her it is either you dress decent or you stay at home. also it is better to start when they are still tweens and instill that pattern in them than when they are full grown teenagers then it is hard to dictate for them what they wear.

and also if you are the one going to buy them the cloths you are in charge to make sure you and/or them make pick the decent ones.

Very very true.

But when I was in middle sch, some kids would come to school with their sleezy cloths in their bag and change it when they get to school.

How do you control that?

well a parent cant always control everything their child does. it is hard esp. when you have no idea that this is what they are doing. as for me, i wouldn't mind searching their backpacks to make sure no hidden clothes. (I'm crazy, i know . . but ) especially when i have an idea that this what they are doing. however, i really do think that when you train them to behave and dress decent they will never depart from it.

lol. . .ok its more like LMAO
boot camp ko boot camp ni!. . . thing abt bootcamps it that it doesnt correct the root of the behaviour the way their trained will only serve to make the child prone to anger(the supressed type) plus it will send a note to the child that u'd rather other pple dealt with your issues(note: i'm talking from a naija point of view). if u cant be strict with your child u're on your own o!

as per boarding schools in naija: they'rnt that bad i went to one for 2yrs(navy) then left and ended up regretting it! it teaches you independence and thats important esp in the world today.

as per dressing one evil(she wasnt that bad. . .jst like calling her that) counsellor in my sec sch(not navy) dropped one line for us and since then i've never flown the collar of a polo shirt(okay maybe in the bathroom mirror sha) she was like. . .big boys never become men, they always remain big boys. . .(since then i started calling myself a yng man o!). . .its abt teaching the child respect not jst for your elders: for God, for your body for other ppls bodies etc and talk, nothing beats talking to the child esp when the child is young so when u start doing it when he's older he doesnt think "oh its now u think what i think is important ehn?"(thats what happened in my house).

P.S. i prefer to work on ppls minds first so i'm more likely to try to cajole a person first

@toyin
nice yarns(. . .the stamping and shopping thing) so u rnt thinking of living in naija? eya pele! my regards to humpty dumpty BTW!

netotse:

lol. . .ok its more like LMAO
boot camp ko boot camp ni!. . . thing abt bootcamps it that it doesnt correct the root of the behaviour the way their trained will only serve to make the child prone to anger(the supressed type) plus it will send a note to the child that u'd rather other pple dealt with your issues(note: i'm talking from a naija point of view). if u cant be strict with your child u're on your own o!

as per boarding schools in naija: they'rnt that bad i went to one for 2yrs(navy) then left and ended up regretting it! it teaches you independence and thats important esp in the world today.

as per dressing one evil(she wasnt that bad. . .jst like calling her that) counsellor in my sec sch(not navy) dropped one line for us and since then i've never flown the collar of a polo shirt(okay maybe in the bathroom mirror sha) she was like. . .big boys never become men, they always remain big boys. . .(since then i started calling myself a yng man o!). . .its abt teaching the child respect not jst for your elders: for God, for your body for other ppls bodies etc and talk, nothing beats talking to the child esp when the child is young so when u start doing it when he's older he doesnt think "oh its now u think what i think is important ehn?"(thats what happened in my house).

P.S. i prefer to work on ppls minds first so i'm more likely to try to cajole a person first

@toyin
nice yarns(. . .the stamping and shopping thing) so u rnt thinking of living in naija? eya pele! my regards to humpty dumpty BTW!

Hmmm, long time?
And you came back with a bang Thanks for updating yourself

Me living in Naija, maybe later on when I retire.

Who is humpty dumpty

~Sissy~:

well a parent cant always control everything their child does. it is hard esp. when you have no idea that this is what they are doing. as for me, i wouldn't mind searching their backpacks to make sure no hidden clothes. (I'm crazy, i know . . but ) especially when i have an idea that this what they are doing. however, i really do think that when you train them to behave and dress decent they will never depart from it.

But what?

Privacy? Trust? What?

I won't jeopardize their safety just b/c of sth called privacy o. I'll search am well well

invite ur children's friends home and be friendly to them
also never act a lasthma official waiting ard the corner to pounce offenders. dont have dat attitude towrds ur children. you shdnt be so eager to correct them @every single mistake, remember who have to win their friendshp and you wont achieve this that way. am i saying u shd let them jst be act how they want to without correctin them? certainly not! the scoldings and all that will always come, even GOD corrects and chastises us cuz he loves us (heb 12), so there is alwayz a place for discipline. just strike the balance with wisdom and that wisdom only can come from GOD.
also remember you cant change anybody. only god can do that cuz he created us all, so good parenting is completel without parents praying for their children and the unity of the family. it's sooooooooooooo important. joke with them, show them love. what ever advise you give to them, whatever instruction you give to them, let it be because it is what god would have them do and not wha t you think they should do,
love never fails. show them true love, teach them to walk in god's path from little, so that even when u are not there, they will stand. if u let them do things just cuz its u who said it, if they dont do stuffs based on conviction or from their heart, chances are they may act otherwise in ur absence. this is not definite but it could happen
i wish i could write muuuuuch more but i hope and believe someone has learnt one or two useful and vialble tips. information really matters.
always see ur family as god's own family. let him be a part of it. i know some folks may be wondering why am going gog god god. well one of the biggest problems with us humans is that sometimes we think we are so smart and can get things done ourselves, so we leave god out of our affairs. well thats futile,

invite ur children's friends home and be friendly to them
also never act a lasthma official waiting ard the corner to pounce offenders. dont have dat attitude towrds ur children. you shdnt be so eager to correct them @every single mistake, remember who have to win their friendshp and you wont achieve this that way. am i saying u shd let them jst be act how they want to without correctin them? certainly not! the scoldings and all that will always come, even GOD corrects and chastises us cuz he loves us (heb 12), so there is alwayz a place for discipline. just strike the balance with wisdom and that wisdom only can come from GOD.
also remember you cant change anybody. only god can do that cuz he created us all, so good parenting is completel without parents praying for their children and the unity of the family. it's sooooooooooooo important. joke with them, show them love. what ever advise you give to them, whatever instruction you give to them, let it be because it is what god would have them do and not wha t you think they should do,
love never fails. show them true love, teach them to walk in god's path from little, so that even when u are not there, they will stand. if u let them do things just cuz its u who said it, if they dont do stuffs based on conviction or from their heart, chances are they may act otherwise in ur absence. this is not definite but it could happen
i wish i could write muuuuuch more but i hope and believe someone has learnt one or two useful and vialble tips. information really matters.
always see ur family as god's own family. let him be a part of it. i know some folks may be wondering why am going gog god god. well one of the biggest problems with us humans is that sometimes we think we are so smart and can get things done ourselves, so we leave god out of our affairs. well thats futile,

invite ur children's friends home and be friendly to them
also never act a lasthma official waiting ard the corner to pounce offenders. dont have dat attitude towrds ur children. you shdnt be so eager to correct them @every single mistake, remember who have to win their friendshp and you wont achieve this that way. am i saying u shd let them jst be act how they want to without correctin them? certainly not! the scoldings and all that will always come, even GOD corrects and chastises us cuz he loves us (heb 12), so there is alwayz a place for discipline. just strike the balance with wisdom and that wisdom only can come from GOD.
also remember you cant change anybody. only god can do that cuz he created us all, so good parenting is completel without parents praying for their children and the unity of the family. it's sooooooooooooo important. joke with them, show them love. what ever advise you give to them, whatever instruction you give to them, let it be because it is what god would have them do and not wha t you think they should do,
love never fails. show them true love, teach them to walk in god's path from little, so that even when u are not there, they will stand. if u let them do things just cuz its u who said it, if they dont do stuffs based on conviction or from their heart, chances are they may act otherwise in ur absence. this is not definite but it could happen
i wish i could write muuuuuch more but i hope and believe someone has learnt one or two useful and vialble tips. information really matters.
always see ur family as god's own family. let him be a part of it. i know some folks may be wondering why am going gog god god. well one of the biggest problems with us humans is that sometimes we think we are so smart and can get things done ourselves, so we leave god out of our affairs. well thats futile,

@ Ebony

i meant even though some might see the idea of backpack searching as crazy or being overactive i would still do it.

~Sissy~:

@ Ebony

i meant even though some might see the idea of backpack searching as crazy or being overactive i would still do it.

there's nothing wrong with searching the backpacks o. . .maybe wot u can do to make it less 'somehow' is on a random when they're getting ready for school or on they way out u can suddenly say oya come lemme see whats inside your bag(that way it seems less paranoid) cos if they find out that u're searching it behind their backs(and they always will) then thats the end. . . u hv officially entered 'one chance' cos then the game becomes 'beat mommy at it. . .reloaded' (esp with young teens).

@toyinrayo
still hvnt found the perfect ISP(am back at work o. . .its on a dam and there are a lot of mountains here so no wireless)so i'm restricted to daytime hours.
sebi u were talking abt humping and dumping, i thot he was a distant relative of humpty-dumpty now. . . BTW how is that u're husband now(the one that was abusing u on one thread. . .i think he has an ibo name or somefink.)

netotse:

there's nothing wrong with searching the backpacks o. . .maybe wot u can do to make it less 'somehow' is on a random when they're getting ready for school or on they way out u can suddenly say oya come lemme see whats inside your bag(that way it seems less paranoid) cos if they find out that u're searching it behind their backs(and they always will) then thats the end. . . u hv officially entered 'one chance' cos then the game becomes 'beat mommy at it. . .reloaded' (esp with young teens).

I totally agree with this!!

netotse:

@toyinrayo
still hvnt found the perfect ISP(am back at work o. . .its on a dam and there are a lot of mountains here so no wireless)so i'm restricted to daytime hours.
sebi u were talking abt humping and dumping, i thot he was a distant relative of humpty-dumpty now. . . BTW how is that u're husband now(the one that was abusing u on one thread. . .i think he has an ibo name or somefink.)

eyah, no wonder I no dey see you anymore. Yes na, I've been looking for your posts here


lmao. . . .like stop misinterpreting my post jor. I said no humping and dumping you're not serious

What husband?

@toyinrayo
lol. . .sorry LWKM (thats the new lol o!)dude's name is ikey somefink o. . .his pet name for u was toyinra i think. . .
i'm working on the internet thingy dnt worry i'll soon be back to my night owl ways

netotse:

@toyinrayo
lol. . .sorry LWKM (thats the new lol o!)dude's name is ikey somefink o. . .his pet name for u was toyinra i think. . .
i'm working on the internet thingy dnt worry i'll soon be back to my night owl ways

You hate me, dnt you? Ikeyman? gosh, you hate me

Ok, just come back quick o

Hello My people

Would you tell your kids how to spend their allowance money you give them (if you actually do give them) ?

or Just allow them to use it on whatever they like?

@sissy
i would pick none of the two u can give 'guidelines' like dont spend it all on sweets, make sure u tithe and stuff like that, but if the 'guidelines' are too many or too stringent then its equivalent to begging the child to lie to you. . .my two cents!

~Sissy~:

Hello My people

Would you tell your kids how to spend their allowance money you give them (if you actually do give them) ?

or Just allow them to use it on whatever they like?

Here is how we do allowance in our home:

the kids allowance is deposited into their savings account every month. They are allowed to spend as they like up to the amount in the account. Here is the catch:

The person to spend the least amount each month receives a bonus of $50.00

Each person also receives 5% interest on what is in the account at the end of each month, not including what the bank gives them.

The end result is them thinking twice and three times about what they want to spend their money on and most times deciding not to spend.

They have been so good that for the past 3 months they have all received the $50.00 bonus.

They have really stacked their cash for summer time but are only allowed $200.00 to take with them to their grandparents house, where they spend the summer.