Nitefury:
Op just find your way jare. Who says her involvement with other guys weren't sexual? She's also not a fool to be waiting endlessly for you that's why she got involved with other guys at different points even though she claimed it wasn't sexual. Don't be surprised she buzz you up and tell you she's found someone else.

Perhaps she's acting as if she's actually waiting for you, while it might just be that the relationship between her and other guys didn't work out.

She don move on before you since, you still dey form lover boy wey no wan break heart.

"however she always complains about my absence and had gotten involved with other men not sexually according to her, but all the other stuffs. I thought of getting married to her in absentia, however recently she got involved with someone and that eroded the trust and love i have for her."

You were busy working and hustling you're back side out while staying faithful so you can come back for her. You even tried securing student visa for her. But as usual she uses your absence and claims of missing you as excuse to get involved with other guys.

Chief, she's still single and "waiting for you" because those guys chop clean mouth waka.

dulux07:

Wat abt if u come to nigeria, get married via registry, would it not mak it easier to get her visa.
U can discuss d issue wit her, so u guys can Breakup amicably.

liquidmetall:






Oga American!! This is the best post on this thread,, ,she has moved on since, claiming she was waiting for you, don't f**king give her a dime

How did you know she wasn't sexualy involved with the guys she met .
God knows I can never act like this, I don't even need any advice on this....

GboyegaD:


He's filed for asylum as such he can't visit Nigeria at least for now. They should work out the student visa thing instead.

oluface:
CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT SARAKI MESS. A WHOLe SENATE PRESIDENT , NO 3 CITIZEN OF NIGERIA. OP , I WILL COMMENT ON YOUR ISSUE LATER , AS YOU CAN SEE ITS STILL AFTER 5AM

dulux07:

SMH, this issue is jst so complicated.

Slimzjoe:


Seems there was a Scale in your Eyes when you got to the Part that Said she's been Involved with Other men

prettyjo:
Men!!!

AfroKnight:
Leave her. She has repeatedly cheated on you so what are you still waiting for? Let her go and marry anyone of those guys she has been dating.

silami:
on point!

prettyjo:
Men!!!

dulux07:


Lol, its no xcuse, dis guy comes home 3x a yr 4 probably 5yrs . Lets b realistic, she is his gf not his wife. How do u want her 2 cope. I wonder how he found out abt d gals relatnships, if it wasnt d gal that came clean to him.

sluvy4tune:



Na true sha!

Body no be firewood....and konji has everly been a bastard ever since the days of Adam and Eve

Reasons why i dont subscribe to long distance relationship

Chibuhealth:
OP if u dare leave that girl, God will punish u! U can't waste her tym all these years for u to be yarning dirty here. Look for alternative nd marry her. You sound as if you are tired of her and can dimiss her with any flimsy excuses

Chibuhealth:
OP if u dare leave that girl, God will punish u! U can't waste her tym all these years for u to be yarning dirty here. Look for alternative nd marry her. You sound as if you are tired of her and can dimiss her with any flimsy excuses

icedbeatz:
can't you advise or type your opinion without displaying your stupidity- ? are you God's assistant to know who he punishes and who he doesn't? you guys opining that the op should comeback and marry her can't you understand the op is trying to find his feet and now isn't time for expenses.
Op dig deep in your heart, do you still love her? the love is reducing because of the information you got and that can really change a guy's heart and the financial and life crisis you were fighting can also affect your decision right now. Only you can really take this decision maybe after reading all the good and scraps of advice here. IMO I'll advise you to give yourself a week and think about and to really know if that's what you really want. A week because it seems like you are on pressure from someone now but try to recall the Time you spent with your fiancee and the kind of person she is, can you afford to lose her? is she the supportive kind? her personality has parts to play in by is decision making . Take your time. I'm not trying to plant negative thoughts but Another thing is has she been faithful like you? are you a back up while she waits for the opportunity to grab another guy? is this love or pity? what's the possibility of you not hating her maybe after you must have married her and things happens not to work out as planned? you might blame her later for it. a lot is involved in this, personally I'll call it quits if it's going jeopardize the future in order to save everyone the headache. I have an uncle who had something similar situation like you and the girl came to the states without his consent and my uncle took her in despite the advice he was given and now I can tell you he regrets it. I love love but reality can be a pain in the azz if the mind and reasoning is not applied to heart matters, once again if I'm in this situation I'll have to let her go but will find a way to give her something reasonable (not like paying her off). Prayab it too and May God help you make the right decision

Nitefury:
Op just find your way jare. Who says her involvement with other guys weren't sexual? She's also not a fool to be waiting endlessly for you that's why she got involved with other guys at different points even though she claimed it wasn't sexual. Don't be surprised she buzz you up and tell you she's found someone else.

Perhaps she's acting as if she's actually waiting for you, while it might just be that the relationship between her and other guys didn't work out.

She don move on before you since, you still dey form lover boy wey no wan break heart.

"however she always complains about my absence and had gotten involved with other men not sexually according to her, but all the other stuffs. I thought of getting married to her in absentia, however recently she got involved with someone and that eroded the trust and love i have for her."

You were busy working and hustling you're back side out while staying faithful so you can come back for her. You even tried securing student visa for her. But as usual she uses your absence and claims of missing you as excuse to get involved with other guys.

Chief, she's still single and "waiting for you" because those guys chop clean mouth waka.

icedbeatz:
may God bless you bro, they were all posting like the girl is a saint and the guy the devil = guilt tripping him.

flyca:
OP what's this lady's offense now, because I haven't seen one.
This is going to be too cold of you.

I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year now, long distance. Just reading your post and imagining if he comes up with a tale like yours how I will feel. The word is scattered. Not to talk of 6 years + introduction! That's a whole lot.

Have you thought that while she was still in a relationship with you, she must have seen her friends fall in love and get married. Have you spared a thought for her family? And all the inyanga she has done for her friends?

Bro, it ain't gonna be easy on both of you no matter how you look at it, esp her. Some people don't ever get to recover from such emotional and psychological trauma. Pls I beg you in the name of all that is true, don't put her in that mess.

And something tells me she is a Nairalander and you want her to accidentally bump into this thread. Girl, if you are reading this, pretend not to. Don't confront him. Don't admit you read it. You have already known what's up. Wait and Pray.

#heaven at last

Princess4eva:


Thank you for your contribution. Like you rightly said, she may never recover from the trauma should he walk away. @ Op, who furnished you with those tales of her escapades? For all you care those doubts may be unfounded, can you live with the fact that you helped destroy a life? Give it a second thought you may be making a mistake, plus that bit about 1million is irritating. She is your girl, talk to her. In every relationship, communication is key and from what we're able to deduce she has been understanding and co-operative. Tall and short is don't leave her based on these flimsy excuses.

moki123:
If you had read my post very well, you will see where i stated that she told me about escapades, so it is not a hearsay. the issue is not even about her involvement, but about the fact that i don't want the relation being prolong any longer due to my inability to come home for and she is under intense pressure from family and friends. I love and will do anything to help her go through it with less stress. we will both be hurt. thanks

icedbeatz:
can't you advise or type your opinion without displaying your stupidity- ? are you God's assistant to know who he punishes and who he doesn't? you guys opining that the op should comeback and marry her can't you understand the op is trying to find his feet and now isn't time for expenses.
Op dig deep in your heart, do you still love her? the love is reducing because of the information you got and that can really change a guy's heart and the financial and life crisis you were fighting can also affect your decision right now. Only you can really take this decision maybe after reading all the good and scraps of advice here. IMO I'll advise you to give yourself a week and think about and to really know if that's what you really want. A week because it seems like you are on pressure from someone now but try to recall the Time you spent with your fiancee and the kind of person she is, can you afford to lose her? is she the supportive kind? her personality has parts to play in by is decision making . Take your time. I'm not trying to plant negative thoughts but Another thing is has she been faithful like you? are you a back up while she waits for the opportunity to grab another guy? is this love or pity? what's the possibility of you not hating her maybe after you must have married her and things happens not to work out as planned? you might blame her later for it. a lot is involved in this, personally I'll call it quits if it's going jeopardize the future in order to save everyone the headache. I have an uncle who had something similar situation like you and the girl came to the states without his consent and my uncle took her in despite the advice he was given and now I can tell you he regrets it. I love love but reality can be a pain in the azz if the mind and reasoning is not applied to heart matters, once again if I'm in this situation I'll have to let her go but will find a way to give her something reasonable (not like paying her off). Prayab it too and May God help you make the right decision

Chibuhealth:
you are just crazy? Anyway Who did write d long note to read? Smh**** some people are stu.pid

icedbeatz:
it's definitely not meant for a numb skull with deteriorated brains so I understand you.

Chibuhealth:
then why did you quote me? Who is now d Numbskull? Idio.t

Richiy:
...and thunder will fire any man/boy I hustled with that wants to dump me after six years....

OP you can NEVER pay her off.