kemlily:
He should be sent to life imprisonment

wicked man

na wa o,witout hearin d man side of d story

onila:
I knew they had to be Yoruba

only Yoruba pple beat their inlaws

pathetic

and they claim to be the most respectful Nigerians

kilosele

Good, the reason is because they dont pay for a bride prize. The moment they are able to get let say a room, lobatan.
The rest na history.

All I knw Is Both the lady, her husband, her parents, who beat person, person wey dem beat, All of them should be sent to prison. This kind news dey annoy me badly.

u are lying, men are naturally jealous, the man has a say here, i know women and their lies, always claiming innocent, putting the blame and sin on the men.

Tradition is tradition, wont your parents collect bride price on you.

oluwaSmith1:
She said, “My husband has not paid my bride price after 13 years of marriage; I now have five kids for him. He did not allow me to work and only gives me N300 to prepare food for the family.



you sef check am nah.


You bi free products? But no wife beater abeg.

1. Your husband ?
2. No bride price
3. Leaved together for 13years
4. You have 5kids
5. Your are seeking for a divorce?

Reality
1. Where is your marriage certificate?
2. Which court accepts such case without documents.
3. There is no wedding, na your boyfriend.
4. Your parents deserve the bitting .

Did she just wake up after 13yrs?

I smell lies

akike:


I am sorry but that it is what all abusers say. Ask any of them and ask psychologist too

Don't blame your lack of self control and self discipline on other people. Stop making excuses to appease your self. Asldnit what you did was wrong. There are many ways you could have afforded beating her but you just couldn't walk away.

Why on earth would you think that you do not do things that make her wish she should stab you to death? . I am sure there are times that she would love to beat the devil out of you or shoot you dead but she restrained herself. Learn to do likewise.

If you cannot leave with her or if you think she is impossible, there is something g called separation and divorce. You have no reason to resort to violence

I apologized to her after the incident, she forgot and forgave me, but it took me nearly 4 months to forgive myself

One question I will like to ask you is
ARE YOU MARRIED?
If you have not then stop talking from theory and what you read from books.

I'm a relationship coach and a minister. Leave spirituality and head knowledge with out handling our mindset with prayers we can do anything.

Let me tell you as a result of my profession and experience, I have come across ladies who, if their husbands stop beating them they will think they man is having an affair outside, their push the man until the man snaps.

Until you meet a woman who can beat you to death with mouth don't talk. I use to criticize men that beat their wives, not until I got married that I understood that it may not be entirely the man choice but he was pushed to.

A man told me his wife will lock the door whe he is sleeping and hide the keys and nag him to death, the man stays out very late, he drinks as well.

I'm not justifying my actions for beating my wife, that's bad and very wrong of me, and he won't try it again.

Beating your wife once is a mistake
Twice is coincidence
The third time is now a habit.

Don't generalize that men who beat their wives are fools.

How many people try to find out what the women did that got them beaten.?

Note:
Never beat a women it show your weakness and temperamental level.

bisdansun:


I apologized to her after the incident, she forgot and forgave me, but it took me nearly 4 months to forgive myself

One question I will like to ask you is
ARE YOU MARRIED?
If you have not then stop talking from theory and what you read from books.

I'm a relationship coach and a minister. Leave spirituality and head knowledge with out handling our mindset with prayers we can do anything.

Let me tell you as a result of my profession and experience, I have come across ladies who, if their husbands stop beating them they will think they man is having an affair outside, their push the man until the man snaps.

Until you meet a woman who can beat you to death with mouth don't talk. I use to criticize men that beat their wives, not until I got married that I understood that it may not be entirely the man choice but he was pushed to.

A man told me his wife will lock the door whe he is sleeping and hide the keys and nag him to death, the man stays out very late, he drinks as well.

I'm not justifying my actions for beating my wife, that's bad and very wrong of me, and he won't try it again.

Beating your wife once is a mistake
Twice is coincidence
The third time is now a habit.

Don't generalize that men who beat their wives are fools.

How many people try to find out what the women did that got them beaten.?

Note:
Never beat a women it show your weakness and temperamental level.

in summary, you fall my hand.

bisdansun:


I apologized to her after the incident, she forgot and forgave me, but it took me nearly 4 months to forgive myself

One question I will like to ask you is
ARE YOU MARRIED?
If you have not then stop talking from theory and what you read from books.

I'm a relationship coach and a minister. Leave spirituality and head knowledge with out handling our mindset with prayers we can do anything.

Let me tell you as a result of my profession and experience, I have come across ladies who, if their husbands stop beating them they will think they man is having an affair outside, their push the man until the man snaps.

Until you meet a woman who can beat you to death with mouth don't talk. I use to criticize men that beat their wives, not until I got married that I understood that it may not be entirely the man choice but he was pushed to.

A man told me his wife will lock the door whe he is sleeping and hide the keys and nag him to death, the man stays out very late, he drinks as well.

I'm not justifying my actions for beating my wife, that's bad and very wrong of me, and he won't try it again.

Beating your wife once is a mistake
Twice is coincidence
The third time is now a habit.

Don't generalize that men who beat their wives are fools.

How many people try to find out what the women did that got them beaten.?

Note:
Never beat a women it show your weakness and temperamental level.

You mean I should believe you over scientific books written and published by professionals. Thanks but I will take a pass.

If you are a relationship counsellor, I take it that you know that the second process of an abusive partner is the blame game. They try to convince themselves that others would have done the same thing if they were in their position. They try to play the victim by redirecting the question you just asked.

Women who wants their husbands to beat then are not normal. It is either they had abusive fathers or abusive brothers. They are obviously into BDSM. You can't use them as an excuse for your actions.

Men who stay in a verbal abusive relationship are as worse as women who stay with physically abusive relationships. Verbal abuse and physical abuse are the same. There is absolutely no difference. I have met men who are just as verbally abusive as some women although I agree that more women are likely to be verbally abusive than men. But men who are physically abusive are also likely to be verbally abusive. Therefore I do not agree with your submission. I totally disagree with it.

All in all, what I got from your comment is that you have always thought yourself as someone with control not until you lost it. Instead of you to calm yourself down, warn and advise your wife not to provoke you again, you sought to justify your reaction by reducing the burden on you. You can do that however you have no right to justify other men's actions based on yours especially when we are dealing with a serial abuser. Yout wife was wrong to verbally abuse you or provoke you and you are also wrong to have reacted.


Answer my questions and I will answer yours and I will tell you how flawed yours is.

Are you aware that there are times your wife have actually felt like killing or hitting you? Have you ever verbally abused your wife? Called her a fool or something else.

bisdansun:



How many people try to find out what the women did that got them beaten.?

Note:
Never beat a women it show your weakness and temperamental level.

What did she do?

Was it because she called her husband, her lord a fool?

Was it be ause she bought something , her husband asked her not to?

Was it because her husband asked her not to talk to someone and she did?

Was it because she burnt the food?

Was it because she is having an affair? I can understand provocation in this situation.

Was it because she wnet out when her husband asked her not to?

What did she do?

Ezelexis:


Interesting. I am now informed. Thanks.

You are welcome

akike:


What did she do?

Was it because she called her husband, her lord a fool?

Was it be ause she bought something , her husband asked her not to?

Was it because her husband asked her not to talk to someone and she did?

Was it because she burnt the food?

Was it because she is having an affair? I can understand provocation in this situation.

Was it because she wnet out when her husband asked her not to?

What did she do?

Should I now wash my dirty clothes outside?
The questions you raised I can't answer in a social network like nairaland

bisdansun:


Should I now wash my dirty clothes outside?
The questions you raised I can't answer in a social network like nairaland

No, the questions I raised still do not give you any right to beat your partner or belittle her. She is not a kid, she has independent mind that is you can tell her what to do and she can decide not to do it if it is not criminal and it is not going to put you in harm's way. If you do not like it, divorce or separate from her. You cannot beat her for failure to obey you or mistakes whether intentional or unintentional.

However the main question is if you expect your wife to listen to you, do you also listen to her. Being the head of the house does not mean that your SPOUSE will listen to you everytime. She has the right to some discretion and she also deserves to be listened to. Therefore if you expect her to listen to you, you also have to listen to her. This is the 21st century, everyone has near equal access to information and have brought up to think independently, you can not and should not expect to be obeyed every time.