This have been bothering me for quite some time now and I am glad a friend of mine on Fb took time to deal with this issue before I could

I'm not capable to do her marriage rites, she wants to help me pay her bride price, what should I do?

On a serious note when I'm being asked this question, another question slides into my mind, What business does a man who can't pay bride price have with marriage?

Let's be realistic, If a man can't pay the bride pride of his woman, and at least organise a minimal marriage ceremony, Why should he think of marriage?

One very important prerequisite for getting married is financial maturity, I'm not saying you should have all the money, but at least be capable to fund your marriage, and have something left over to cater for your wife.

I'm not against a woman supporting her man, but its very unmanly for a woman to give you Money to pay her bride price. she is free to support in any other arrangement of the marriage but not paying her bride price.

I know love is so strong and we can do anything cos of it.

I'm not imposing my opinion on any one, but I think its more prestigious to borrow money from friends than get money from your yet to be wife, to pay her bride price.

let men seat up and stop using the name of love to relax.

It is a sign of relinquishing one’s authority as the head of the family to the woman. That is just how it starts. The man should not allow the lady’s desperation to overwhelm him and thereby make him take crazy decisions. He should wait till when he gets the money to pay the bride price. He should prove his capability to take care of the woman in the marriage.

The only thing the woman can do is to plead with her parents to perhaps reduce the amount for her partner. After all, paymentof bride price is not the determinant of success in marriage.

Allowing your woman pay her dowry might cause future issues, reference to that and telling you you're unfit. you know most women can talk, especially when heated up. its an exceptional woman who wouldn't refer to that when they have issues, and this kind of woman is always one out of one million, very rare to find.


But if you have such woman, No palaver, But ehmmmmm...

Its advisable to pay your woman's bride price, No matter the love you feel she has for you, Biko take the lead in that aspect. she can assist in other things.

Love is not all that matters, they're protocols you must observe to be taken serious and capable.

[b]
Bottom line: If you can't pay a woman's bride piece, you ain't ready for marriage.
Go and make money bro, marriage is a place to show your manliness.

Solomon Franklin Buchi Bartholomew

but guys, seriously will you allow your wife to be give you money to pay her bride price?

girls will you do it??

To me it's allowed.... I will accept 100%

Why will I help him pay my bride price? It will reduce my worth to zero. If any issue comes up in the house, he can even tell me that I forced myself on him and he'd be right. If he doesn't have money to pay my bride price, how are we going to feed? Or will I continue to wear the pants in the house?
I'm not against a woman supporting her man but when it comes to me paying my bride price, I'm out. He should zip his trouser and keep his dangling stuff in place. I aint doing it.

libertyfather:
To me it's allowed.... I will accept 100%

Then you have lost your manhood and not fit to be addressed as a man.

EverLily:
Why will I help him pay my bride price? It will reduce my worth to zero. If any issue comes up in the house, he can even tell me that I forced myself on him and he'd be right. If he doesn't have money to pay my bride price, how are we going to feed? Or will I continue to wear the pants in the house?
I'm not against a woman supporting her man but when it comes to me paying my bride price, I'm out. He should zip his trouser and keep his dangling stuff in place. I aint doing it.

una don start ehn. if fimenism thread show now una go come dey shout equality

Is the bride price millions that the man wont be able to meet up?

A man that is not capable to pay his woman bride price is not fit to be a husband

@ topic, the essence of being the head of a home is lost the moment a man allows a woman to pay her bride-price on his behalf.

Like you rightly pointed, a man who can't afford the bride-price is not fit to get married. Let such a man work hard and save more.

Sometimes ladies, as a result of pressure from family and the views of the society may be desperate as to encouraging her man to accept money from her to pay her bride price. For such women, you have succeeded in sowing the seed of laziness in your man. You will end up paying house rent and feeding him.

Personally, I don't subscribe to allowing a woman pay her bride price on behalf of the man.

Owliver:
una don start ehn. if fimenism thread show now una go come dey shout equality

It's true. Would you let your sister pay her own bride price? Somethings require common sense. Not everything is about feminism.

Person no fit jst go registry wed nd forget all this crap ni

EverLily:
It's true. Would you let your sister pay her own bride price? Somethings require common sense. Not everything is about feminism.

if you are a feminist dont select. be equal in every aspect or else your a fraud. and if my sister chooses to pay who da fhurk am i to say no?

Owliver:
if you are a feminist dont select. be equal in every aspect or else your a fraud. and if my sister chooses to pay who da fhurk am i to say no?

Whatever rocks your boat. I'm not a feminist BTW

Gender equality!!!
I will accept.
And pay her back if my millions arrive.

EverLily:
Whatever rocks your boat. I'm not a feminist BTW

good then i'll pay for ur food on our first date.

stupidity:
Gender equality!!!

I will accept.

And pay her back if my millions arrive.

pay back ke. you funny oh.

EverLily:
Why will I help him pay my bride price? It will reduce my worth to zero. If any issue comes up in the house, he can even tell me that I forced myself on him and he'd be right. If he doesn't have money to pay my bride price, how are we going to feed? Or will I continue to wear the pants in the house?
I'm not against a woman supporting her man but when it comes to me paying my bride price, I'm out. He should zip his trouser and keep his dangling stuff in place. I aint doing it.

It's only a boy that will think it is normal. It clearly shows he doesn't know what being a man is and the responsibilities attached to it.

The first primary assignment of a husband to be is the payment of the bride price.

Owliver:
good then i'll pay for ur food on our first date.

Who told you there would be a date?

ABOMINATION!


Its better not to ay the bride price at all than her paying on my behalf. Nigerian culture not Indian!!

I hope this Op and the friend are both girls, na una papa house una go small. If the girl have money why won't I allow her pay the bride price, either you pay it ur self or not does not determine if u would have authority in your marriage,that one depends on the husband.

EverLily:
Who told you there would be a date?

we can fix one sure.

Chanchit:
I hope this Op and the friend are both girls, na una papa house una go small. If the girl have money why won't I allow her pay the bride price, either you pay it ur self or not does not determine if u would have authority in your marriage,that one depends on the husband.

eya. we are guys dude... if you want a dowry, go marry an Indian

even a truck pusher can pay the "bride price". the problems stems from greedy families with their wicked lists not to talk of the feast that follows after the "deal" has been sealed.

cuvox:


eya. we are guys dude... if you want a dowry, go marry an Indian

Indian o, greek o, I would accept the offer, kapish! Sebi na jeje we sidon before una ask our opinion.

EverLily:
Why will I help him pay my bride price? It will reduce my worth to zero. If any issue comes up in the house, he can even tell me that I forced myself on him and he'd be right. If he doesn't have money to pay my bride price, how are we going to feed? Or will I continue to wear the pants in the house?
I'm not against a woman supporting her man but when it comes to me paying my bride price, I'm out. He should zip his trouser and keep his dangling stuff in place. I aint doing it.

this is you in few years

EverLily:
It's true. Would you let your sister pay her own bride price? Somethings require common sense. Not everything is about feminism.

o girl if my sister egg don almost finish and she wan beat biological clock na to pay the bride price sharp sharp so long as she is happy with the guy.una Just de hia de run una mouth not realising that everybody's situation is different. never say never. I know person when de make 180 while he's husband de collect 8 K. now they are happily married while many of her friends are still waiting for ready-made husband. no be everybody like loneliness or so attractive that she can pick and choose. if go no go Who no know go know

BlackrulesDworld:


It's only a boy that will think it is normal. It clearly shows he doesn't know what being a man is and the responsibilities attached to it.

The first primary assignment of a husband to be is the payment of the bride price.

in peace time. if kasala burst na the most violent man go get the finest babe.

xtervaganza:
this is you in few years

Listen boy, there's nothing wrong for a woman to support a man but I can't pay my bride price. Everything should not be a joke or is your IQ that low? When your IQ is improved, you can mention me. For now, I'm done. #okbye

EverLily:
Why will I help him pay my bride price? It will reduce my worth to zero. If any issue comes up in the house, he can even tell me that I forced myself on him and he'd be right. If he doesn't have money to pay my bride price, how are we going to feed? Or will I continue to wear the pants in the house?
I'm not against a woman supporting her man but when it comes to me paying my bride price, I'm out. He should zip his trouser and keep his dangling stuff in place. I aint doing it.

you made soo much emphasis on sex and money. im wondering what your job is

mikolo80:
o girl if my sister egg don almost finish and she wan beat biological clock na to pay the bride price sharp sharp so long as she is happy with the guy.una Just de hia de run una mouth not realising that everybody's situation is different. never say never. I know person when de make 180 while he's husband de collect 8 K. now they are happily married while many of her friends are still waiting for ready-made husband. no be everybody like loneliness or so attractive that she can pick and choose. if go no go Who no know go know

Lol...I'm not talking about marrying a ready made husband. I believe in women supporting their husbands. What about if she doesn't work and the husband is not financially secured? If she manages to pay her bride price, what happens next? The bottom line is that if the bride price is too high, she can ask/beg her parents to lower it so the guy would be able to pay. He has to be a man

segzicres:


you made soo much emphasis on sex and money. im wondering what your job is

Check well, you'll see some emphasis on self worth, food, him being a man and common sense. Okay, I'm an importer and exporter

the man should pay the bride price without the woman's assistance.

Unless she is far richer than him perhaps?

dunno.

EverLily:
Check well, you'll see some emphasis on self worth, food, him being a man and common sense. Okay, I'm an importer and exporter

no, you made emphasis on sex and money as being the only basis for being a man.

segzicres:


no, you made emphasis on sex and money as being the only basis for being a man.

It wasn't sex I mentioned, it was his sex organ. Truly, sex and money are not the only basis for being a man. Should I give you the criteria to meet before you're called a man? Lol