arabianights:


no naa guy,haba .you ma sef no try.No pour your blessings away oooo.compose yourself and stay away from those chicks some dont come with blessings at all.If na marry go ahead but dont use your own hand to bring your self down

Yes ooo

zaza999:
Our company folded up and was closed down without payment of some months salary, let alone paying off. Since then it's not been easy financially and otherwise while seriously looking for job.

The one that surpises me is some friends' attitude since i am jobless.These are people when we were doing well in our office, we mingled together etc, but since the jobless saga started, many of them started disssociating themselves.They wont visit you as usual, they can't even give you a call, most time when you call them, they won't even pick your calls after seeing many missed calls from you on their phone but that wasn't the case when things were okay.

Telling them about helping you in search of jobs seems like a disturbance, many of them you will forward your cv to, will simply ignore making efforts while claiming as if they are doing anything on it. You will be seeing yourself as an abandoned fellow.The story is endless.

I begin to ask, are these as a result of wrong friends or normal thing. Advise or share your experience.

Two things define a person!, Ur humility when u have nothing and your "ATTITUDE" when you've gotten what u seek. Your Present Predicament should serve as an eye opener to you, Believe everything, but "TRUST" nobody.

Such is life bro. Thank God for family and my few true friends. As for those unfriendly fake friends, I dey watch my step with them joor. Na so one come follow me dey talk one time like that, when he noticed as things take be for man pikin then, na so en take style waka. Na so en go dey promise for phone if en manage pikam. Na so I just forget am joor. Thank God say man no be God.

Today God has done a lot for me and I have great testimonies.

Life aint fair man. Op See it as a challange that must be overcomed someday. Get focused and never trust.
Family is better off NUclear.

You choose your friends, and others choose you as theirs.
In reality, many of those we call friends are not actually our friends but those that call us their friends.
I always laugh when I hear people say 'I am good in making friends'. You are in for biggg stuff.

4C2215131:


4. Those you put in hard times.

Confirm

murphyibiam15:

the family is the bed rock of our human existence..
one with a good family has additional life added onto his years..

Hmm

Tnk u for words of wisdom.

It wasn't easy than, nothing pass family oo.

MadCow1:
OP..

Stop whining.. Its not personal.

Out of sight, out of mind. The moment you leave their line of sight, the less they see you. Its just natural.


Also your mindset awould make you see things that don't exist. You may be reading things that are not there. I have friends who are jobless that feel that because I am working and doing well I should be able to get them a job which in all honesty I cant. Not everybody who has a job has the ability to influence recruitment. Even those that work in H.R.

I hear a lot of anger and self pity in your post. I felt the same way too. I was just looking through my account statement a few minutes ago and was seeing transactions with colleagues from my old job that I have not even heard a word from ever since I left that job. They didn't even call to ask me how I was faring and stuff. I don't hold it against them, everybody is too busy trying to make a good life for themselves to be bothered with me.

However let me tell you about how I got my new job.. It was via recommendation by an old colleague who wasn't even that close to me sef then. But apparently, he was with his uncle who works in another company when their conversation got towards work and his uncle mentioned an availability for a job description that I used to do. He just mouthed off that he knew someone who did similar job in his company that just got laid off ad that's how I got a call out of nowhere from the guy saying to send my resume to his uncle. Till tomorrow its like a miracle of sorts because the person who did this for me was not my friend, just that guy that I would stop by his office to have some small talk with. I don't know his surname, never been to his house, never sat for drinks with him, never hung out with him. Just hang shakes and how are you sort of friend. I never even told him what I did nor do I know his job description either.

Basically, stop expecting too much from other people. Help will come when help comes. Maintain all friendships as best as you can as I believe good and bad friends have their uses.

Wishing you the best.

Thank you! Thank you!! Thank you!!!

You are one of the very few people I wish I know in real life on this forum.

a wise man once told me this/these are your only true friend/friends thru thick and thin in this life.


[img]http://www.free-photos.biz/images/business/money/preview/five_hundred_naira.jpg[/img]

OP,it seems like you were in my mind cos i had major reflections today. As a decent woman,it's even more difficult being jobless or unemployed. Those girls that you thought were your girl friends turn out to be fake and mean. Imagine someone you used to submit CV with, write Aptitude test and even fix 400 naira weavon together,start giving you major levels simply because she got a big job in a big company.
The kind of attitude i received eh. I remember when i couldn't pay for an asoebi,and one of them said ''haba na,it's only 10k o'' just because i was unemployed.
Thank God it's all in the past. It's a good period to know who your true friends are. Invest in your family and keep holding on to God. If i narrate the attitude i got from some of my ''former'' girl friends during that period,nairaland wouldn't be enough for that....
P.s Cast away those fair weather friends even before you get back on your feet. These days i trust strangers more.

They have said it all, even th some na lie just 4 them to belong to d convo

You're very myopic. As big as you are,you should know who your friends are.The truth is that those guys you call your friends aren't your friends;they are people willing to enjoy with you as long as it lasts.Also,friends value and respect you If you're wise,but they use and dump you like tissue paper when they realise you're a fool.In your case,you're a capital fool because your reasoning was very static when you had a job:you thought the job is your father's therefore it would last forever.If you had thought of the day you'll lose your job from the first day you got the job,you won't be complaining about your friends abandoning you.Use your tongue to count your teeth.It's your fault because you misplaced priority.In your next job,try to invest in your future before frolicking with fake friends!Thank me later.

zaza999:
Our company folded up and was closed down without payment of some months salary, let alone paying off. Since then it's not been easy financially and otherwise while seriously looking for job.

The one that surpises me is some friends' attitude since i am jobless.These are people when we were doing well in our office, we mingled together etc, but since the jobless saga started, many of them started disssociating themselves.They wont visit you as usual, they can't even give you a call, most time when you call them, they won't even pick your calls after seeing many missed calls from you on their phone but that wasn't the case when things were okay.

Telling them about helping you in search of jobs seems like a disturbance, many of them you will forward your cv to, will simply ignore making efforts while claiming as if they are doing anything on it. You will be seeing yourself as an abandoned fellow.The story is endless.

I begin to ask, are these as a result of wrong friends or normal thing. Advise or share your experience.

Kachisbarbie:
That is a normal thing. You would ping some in the morning, they would reply 3days later_ yet they keep changing dps (e.g) Friedplantain.

Laugh wan kill me die!!

hedonistic:


I think family in this case means one's nuclear family.. Your parents and your real brothers and sisters. Forget cousins or uncles and distant relatives...

Sorry to say... I always tell people I don't have aunts and uncles or even cousins.

I stopped depending on my distant relatives when I demanded 2k from my aunt who is a lecturer for post ume form. She posted me as fit I was asking her for a date.

She later told me the money is not available that the bag of rice and beans just got finished and she need to replace it. This is a person that her husband is a doctor. I nodded my head in tears.

It was a childhood friend that helped me out and my mum later helped me with the admission fees. Till I graduated from sch I never called any distant relatives even during n after service. My family is my parents, brothers and sister only.

There is nothing like your nuclear family and true friends.

hedonistic:


I think family in this case means one's nuclear family.. Your parents and your real brothers and sisters. Forget cousins or uncles and distant relatives...

Sorry to say... I always tell people I don't have aunts and uncles or even cousins.

I stopped depending on my distant relatives when I demanded 2k from my aunt who is a lecturer for post ume form. She posted me as fit I was asking her for a date.

She later told me the money is not available that the bag of rice and beans just got finished and she need to replace it. This is a person that her husband is a doctor. I nodded my head in tears.

It was a childhood friend that helped me out and my mum later helped me with the admission fees. Till I graduated from sch I never called any distant relatives even during n after service. My family is my parents, brothers and sister only.

There is nothing like your nuclear family and true friends.
May God help us

mehn, its same wif me... everyone has run-off like drainage, lol, even those i tot i had close are acting funny.. its nufin sha, we wl b fyn

Tamakay:
Similar cases abound my brother. Having what you post in mind, I played a trick on some of my so called friends including my two years old date recently. The revelation I got was shocking. I pretended to them that I'm no longer working and I sustained the trick for three months. Guys...hmm they all ran away. The babe was the first to run.

I couldn't help but laugh...

mykel231:
You're very myopic. As big as you are,you should know who your friends are.The truth is that those guys you call your friends aren't your friends;they are people willing to enjoy with you as long as it lasts.Also,friends value and respect you If you're wise,but they use and dump you like tissue paper when they realise you're a fool.In your case,you're a capital fool because your reasoning was very static when you had a job:you thought the job is your father's therefore it would last forever.If you had thought of the day you'll lose your job from the first day you got the job,you won't be complaining about your friends abandoning you.Use your tongue to count your teeth.It's your fault because you misplaced priority.In your next job,try to invest in your future before frolicking with fake friends!Thank me later.

Must u insult him?! Ur advice is like gems interspersed in f.aeces; u jst messed up everything, dude!!!!

That's how you know who your friends are.
And if there aren't any showing love at this stage of your life, then it automatically means you have no friend! Simple!

Thats life... People who don't love you would support you when it beneficial... Stay strong... A New Day Will Come...

OP,just be strong,forget friends,ur only friend is Jesus.Its very painful that people are only interested in u if u have things.U will even BBM them,WHATSUP them,FACEBOOK them,they won't reply but ignore u because they thought u want to beg them money or disturb them,but if u r a millionaire or PMB or one Senator's son and they see your missed calls,bbm,whatsup etc,they will quickly call u back or reply u.Fair whether friends is d worst friends u can ever have,so u have to put ur trust in God.Look @ GEJ when he was President,he has millions of friends and everybody want to know and identify with him,today GEJ's friends have reduced by 95 percent.Assuming GEJ won d election and still d president,do u think those friends will reduce,it will rather increase.

zaza999:
Our company folded up and was closed down without payment of some months salary, let alone paying off. Since then it's not been easy financially and otherwise while seriously looking for job.

The one that surpises me is some friends' attitude since i am jobless.These are people when we were doing well in our office, we mingled together etc, but since the jobless saga started, many of them started disssociating themselves.They wont visit you as usual, they can't even give you a call, most time when you call them, they won't even pick your calls after seeing many missed calls from you on their phone but that wasn't the case when things were okay.

Telling them about helping you in search of jobs seems like a disturbance, many of them you will forward your cv to, will simply ignore making efforts while claiming as if they are doing anything on it. You will be seeing yourself as an abandoned fellow.The story is endless.

I begin to ask, are these as a result of wrong friends or normal thing. Advise or share your experience.

Are the friends owing you money. If no then they owe you nothing than FAVOUR.
Yes you heard me right. Let us believe in ourselves and forge ahead trusting God. For He will never leave or forsake you.
Sometimes give them a benefit of doubt. Jobs can't just be picked off the shelf. Most people knew how many years it took them to get one. Giving someone your cv and you started calling him everyday makes many people feel bad explaining to you that he has not gotten one.
The only person I owe is God and my immediate family, all others we do ourselves favour. I have done great things for my friends that needs assistance but I take it as a favour and not a duty.

I learnt all dis wen GEJ lost his presidential sit

MrHighSea:
ex ur gurl or she exes u.

When you are jobless,just forget about friends.You have nobody o.People only come around when you are successful.Its well.

Uhhm...this same issue has been on my mind for days.Everyone that promised to help me with a job has certainly left me hanging.From uncles who stop taking your calls..To friends who ignore your bbm messages reminding them of their promise to help in the jon search.Or is ot employers who string you along maybe because they don't know how to tell you they can't hire you?I just told myself to stop pushing too hard.Its too early to be cynical and discouraged,but its not easy.The season of unemployment is something I would not wish on an enemy.Do you know how depressing it gets waking up with no plans for the day?As far as efforts goes,I have tried.I have called everyone I can think of.I am tired of having my so called friends pity me.The latest was someone from law sch telling me,"how come a whole you does not have a job?You were one of the best in our class na,how come?"I didn't know when I started crying.Its not an issue of poor result,nor not praying.Infact,I have been fasting to get a job with a good firm I can practice with.Abi na efforts?I started applying for jobs since august!Its october and I can't think of a law firm that I have not sent my cv to online.I try to encourage myself that this too shall pass!I even had to delete my facebook app because I am tired of people asking me "so where are you working?"In fact,now I get why many rich people become stingy.Because you don't know what they suffered to get to where they are.I am not even begging anyone for money o,just send out my cv,put in a good word.But no one can really do that.If there's anything I have learnt,its that nobody cares until you make it.How you make it,is solely your responsiblity!I know God will see me through this phase.I have decided to start work at a law firm that pays 15k.Its nothing but I figure with the way I get depressed and moody staying home,I may just become a nervous wreck if I don't get sth that takes me out of my house daily.That's my advice to anyone looking for a job.Get something to do to get your mind off things.Lately,I have been having insomnia,serious depression(that explains why I am active on nairaland) and can't even eat like I used to.I am tired rambling abeg.I hope for a better tommorrow.

I had similar experience. I have learnt to choose my friends wisely. The experience has made me a better person.

kweku8888:
My own eyes have seen a lot, friends that when u see them in church or gathering they wld be forming phone call,its when they see u,that they wld know the phone is ringing and excuse themselves to receive phone call for hrs. God help us.

HA WETIN UR EYE SEE WHEN U ARE THE CHIEF COMENTER ON NAIRALAND ?

Ihuomadinihu:
OP,it seems like you were in my mind cos i had major reflections today. As a decent woman,it's even more difficult being jobless or unemployed. Those girls that you thought were your girl friends turn out to be fake and mean. Imagine someone you used to submit CV with, write Aptitude test and even fix 400 naira weavon together,start giving you major levels simply because she got a big job in a big company.
The kind of attitude i received eh. I remember when i couldn't pay for an asoebi,and one of them said ''haba na,it's only 10k o'' just because i was unemployed.
Thank God it's all in the past. It's a good period to know who your true friends are. Invest in your family and keep holding on to God. If i narrate the attitude i got from some of my ''former'' girl friends during that period,nairaland wouldn't be enough for that....
P.s Cast away those fair weather friends even before you get back on your feet. These days i trust strangers more.

Meeehn life sha

arabianights:


i be chick but i flow more with men .all my friends are men and trust me i be hustla.
Me sef, i go soon hammer and when i do.........................my attitude to some people go make ice block feel like hot water, that is wayyyy warmer next to me.

No Padi for jungle like the street Guys say...self Reliance is the Key