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Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help - Romance - Nairaland

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8 Signs Your Union Might Not Last / legal union in modern society: different angle / What's Your Take On A Christian/Muslim Relationship? (2) (3) (4)

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Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by FlyAway15(f): 1:56pm On May 14, 2009
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[/list] [b][/b] My fiance and I are scheduled to be married next week. I am christian american. He is african muslim. We always agreed that I would not convert to muslim religion. Last week he started begging me to convert so his family could see this as a "real" marriage.
He says he didn't know they would expect me (the wife) to convert. He says that he JUST LEARNED THAT IT WAS his familys tradition and expectation of me. I want them to all respect this union but now it seems that it won't be at all.

Me converting would probably kill my very religous elderly grandmother and raise caution whithin my family since I never planned on it before.

If I convert, and decide later that it is not for me, won't that be the same as not ever converting in the beginning? He wants me to convert so we can have our wedding. What do u think I should do?
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by tpiah: 2:15pm On May 14, 2009
like your user name says, fly away.



What else will his family ask him to tell you?

The man is not serious. There are Muslim guys who will follow their wives to church at least for the first few years. They wont pressure her to convert until after 7-20 years of marriage.

This fellow is a joker.
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by yme1(f): 2:18pm On May 14, 2009
you made a big mistake by saying you and your husband to be would go to diff churches
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by Seun(m): 3:25pm On May 14, 2009
It's definitely going to be a problem. I don't think the two of you can cope. End it amicably.
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by IFELEKE(m): 3:29pm On May 14, 2009
@Poster,
Inter Religous Unions are always very dicey and issues like faith(religion to be practised after the union)is always the major bone of contention so I'll advise you to carefully weigh your options before you commit yourself.
There is nothing like converting now and changing back later. . . Think with your Head and NOT your Heart.
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by spikedcylinder: 3:37pm On May 14, 2009
He knew all along, he is crafty. This is his way of tricking you to convert to his religion - by using your wedding as a bait.

Inter religious marriages can only work when BOTH parties agree to respect each others religious beliefs.
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by vanderjo(m): 3:55pm On May 14, 2009
@poster,
End it.He is playing you.
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by IFELEKE(m): 4:08pm On May 14, 2009
spikedcylinder:

Inter religious marriages can only work when BOTH parties agree to respect each others religious beliefs.
. . .In Principle and in Action. . .Good One spiked. . . hope the poster will take lessons from all that has been said on the subject matter
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by Ournaija: 5:14pm On May 14, 2009
I think change of religion must be of personal conviction and not an obligation. If your hubby and his people loves you very much, they should be mondful of where you will  spend enternity.

I need to ask you this question. What is christianity to you? Do you think with Islam you will get to heaven. The ball is your court. If you dont mind getting married here on earth and miss eternity then go ahead. If you think Islam will take you to heaven make a change. If you are sticking to christianity call your fiancee and explain to him to understand that it about where you will spend your life after death.The choice is all yours.
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by FlyAway15(f): 7:23pm On May 14, 2009
IFELEKE:

There is nothing like converting now and changing back later. . . Think with your Head and NOT your Heart.

Please clarify, there is nothing like it in what sense?
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by Nobody: 8:00pm On May 14, 2009
"He JUST learned"? rotflmao. Some men can LIE!! shocked shocked

POSTER
What IFELEKE is trying to say is that, you can't convert into muslim just to go through with the wedding, and then change back into christianity.
He won't take it, neither would his family.
African marriage does not allow husband and wife to go to seperate "worshiping" place. Think of the children.

*Sinking sand in the making*


Don't think with your heart, think with your head.
Re: Christian/muslim Union In Distress. Help by justwise(m): 8:25pm On May 14, 2009
FlyAway15:

[list]
[li][/li]
[li][/li]
[/list] [b][/b] My fiance and I are scheduled to be married next week. I am christian american. He is african muslim. We always agreed that I would not convert to muslim religion. Last week he started begging me to convert so his family could see this as a "real" marriage.
He says he didn't know they would expect me (the wife) to convert. He says that he JUST LEARNED THAT IT WAS his familys tradition and expectation of me. I want them to all respect this union but now it seems that it won't be at all.

Me converting would probably kill my very religous elderly grandmother and raise caution whithin my family since I never planned on it before.

If I convert, and decide later that it is not for me, won't that be the same as not ever converting in the beginning? He wants me to convert so we can have our wedding. What do u think I should do?




He lied to u, he knew that all along, nothing like he just leaned, like other posters pointed out, no going back after converting, if u want to change ur mind after the wedding then forget about the marriage

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