MRbrownJAY:

yes it depends on the person. if i meet someone then the feeling i have for her and how she handles herself in my presence will either make me show my feelings or wait until the right moment to let go.
there is a right time and moment to show your loving feelings to someone, even if you automatically feel attraction for them, you have to be careful about who you showing it to. some women cant handle quick show of affection and can be scared of it(or perceive it the wrong way) while others will abuse that show of affection.
of course, i wont be cold as ice and then one day change to lovey dovey, its a gradual state and if along the way, there is some "problems" then i back down.
so it all depends on the right moment, the right mood, the right relationship and the right person.
if i fall in love with a person that i dont feel will ever be more than a bedroom buddy, then i will not let her know about my affection for her because i wouldnt want to mislead her. i wouldnt be cold as ice but i would never be lovey dovey either and the moment she try to step up the relationship, i would bring it down.
its all about how comfortable you are with someone.

origina9ja:

hummm
i'll try it
just hope i don't over do it

AEjiro:

I tink d postt is refering to an existing r/ship

MRbrownJAY:

the first 2 lines were about new relationships, the next 7lines were about existing relationships.

Emperoh:

Do you know what this looks like?
I am very hungry. . . . .as in VERY hungry, i get to a friends place or probably a neighbour.
Or someone you are well acquainted with. He is eating or has some food. . . .  . and he asks, 'Pls come and join me'
And i am like, No am very ok' so that you won't be called 'usa' in my mother tongue or long throat in general parlance.
Meanwhile, deep down inside, hunger the tear me apart!!
And at the end of the meal I am like argh!!! how i wish!!

Wish for what? I just ended up punishing myself. My being hungry and refusing to eat is one punishment
Watching food i have access to being eaten is even a worse punishment!! So tell me why subject yourself to this?

This is what a relationship is like. . . . . . he/she is there for the taking
But for the fear of what you are not even SURE of, you hide your personality.
deny yourself pleasure and the sensation being cared for brings. . . . . do you what it will result to?

If (s)he doesn't discover what it is you are doing, you will be a sore loser.
Cos at the end of the day, he gets bored of ya cold approach to the affair and looks for someone else
For the fear of losing her/him, you went cold, but you finally lost her/him. Losing both ways.

So why not free yourself, enjoy the gift you didn't sacrifice anything to get, be yourself and enjoy the fascination of being able to attract the opposite sex. Its fun and good to know you are desired, that you are wanted and that someone outside those whose primary responsiblity it is to care for you, loves and desires you.

One question for you; How long do you intend to remain in that cold cocoon! Assuming you don't get the proof you are looking for?
Life is a risk. Leaving your house to work is a risk. So is everything we do to survive.
So don't let the unascertained inhibitions rob you of what you desire.

Go out there and be HOT!! Not WARM!!!

stillwater:

Surprisingly, I'm very very warm, could be extremely hot but only in private.  

AEjiro:

WORD!

I hate hide and seek. what u wont do with me in open dont even try in private (X excluded sha )

stillwater:

That is why in this life time, we would never cross paths.

OBNOXIOUS:

What feelings?

The day you remotely attempt to open up your felings by mistake sef or tell her "You Love her" thats the day you should go and price your coffin. I can't remember when last i tried to open up my feelings or ever telling a girl i love her except when i am Fuc**k***ing her to encourage her to open her Legs wider!

kokoye:

Top reasons for being cold (although you would not admit it - also part of the problem):

Insecurity

Fear of rejection

Very low self-esteem

Pride

Lack of trust

At times, these are a result of life experiences - growing up with a single parent; parents being taken for granted, etc.

But there is NO LOVE when any of the reasons above are present. A relationship can never been enjoyed when any of the reasons are present. It gets as bad as you not being able to apologise when you are wrong.


Called me whipped but I am HOT and married to a HOT damsel.

spikedcylinder:

I couldn't agree more.

Personally though, it ranges for me. I could grow from hot to cold in seconds.

spikedcylinder:

I couldn't agree more.

Personally though, it ranges for me. I could grow from hot to cold in seconds.

kokoye:

Top reasons for being cold (although you would not admit it - also part of the problem):

Insecurity

Fear of rejection

Very low self-esteem

Pride

Lack of trust

At times, these are a result of life experiences - growing up with a single parent; parents being taken for granted, etc.

But there is NO LOVE when any of the reasons above are present. A relationship can never been enjoyed when any of the reasons are present. It gets as bad as you not being able to apologise when you are wrong.


Called me whipped but I am HOT and married to a HOT damsel.

kaboninc:

Can some body please help me am not hot, warm or cold?

davidylan:

the thermostat mechanism is best for me. Be hot when you need to be and withdraw if its not reciprocated. You cant waste your time and effort on someone who wont appreciate it.

But when its a woman i'm deeply involved with . . . warm all the way. You wont need to ask, you'll know, feel and hear it often.