I took my time to read your post carefully. am a married man as well and I know wat u are passing tru.the only thing I can say with wat people av said is that it is better to be alive single than to die untimely death without enjoying single hour of your marriage. then u need to move closer to God to undo those things she has done to u spiritually. run,run and run for your dear life.a word is enough for a wise.
Divorce is an extreme so I wouldn't advise you to do that for now, but as a matter of urgency, you need to separate yourself from this lady and be as far as possible from her. The separation might take as long as it might be, this would enable you pray to God for restoration, get another job / find something doing, and retrace your bearing in life. After all these you can now re-examine your so called marriage whether you sould amend it or you finally put a stop to it.
Note:
1. That girl is out to kill you & distroy you like the devil (John 10:10)
2. While you are away, avoid all forms of communications or contacts with her (if you can withdraw your daughter from her before separation, that's cool. But if otherwise, forget all things and move on at least for now. If your enemy die, what would be would be).
3. Most of the people (pastors, parents, uncle, in law and others) telling you to be patient would curse & blame you for being foolish even on your burial ground.
4. Even if your so called wife beg/pretend to be a changed person, pls don't be deceived because pigs don't change overnight .
5. Don't ever think of having anything to do with her unless you have identified your bearing in life.
u went to marry a devil knowing fully that she is a devil, and ur still staying with her. she will surely surprise u one day as she said, by that time nothing anybody including those her relatives living comfortably in their marriage n allowing u to suffer so much in urs, can do about.
look at what is happening and ur still looking for advice? She has made u a fool right from the period of John de Baptist.
But try to notice her happy moment, Try to talk to her in happy moment on how to resolve your family problem, ask for the sacrifice she'l need to be free frm her evil social groups. Both parties should apologise, we av only heard your own part of the story, She'l also have her own story against you jst as you have shared her story here.
Always start each day with Family Prayer to avoid the story that touches the heart for that day.
May God help the singles not to marry the wrong Person.
Bro as I read through your post, I begin to drop tears. This is clear that she's sent to your life to destroy you. Bro she has no Christianity in her at all.
How I wish I know your name, will be keeping you and your daughter in prayers.
GamaG: u went to marry a devil knowing fully that she is a devil, and ur still staying with her. she will surely surprise u one day as she said, by that time nothing anybody including those her relatives living comfortably in their marriage n allowing u to suffer so much in urs, can do about.
look at what is happening and ur still looking for advice? She has made u a fool right from the period of John de Baptist.
EggovinMma: Samocholi, To be sincere with you, it's best you leave that marriage. I think with thus whole story, the time is already too ripe . Haba! So you mean she slept with a married man that poured sperm inside her ? That your wife is really nasty, sorry to say.How can a woman chase her husband with a pant over 5k for something as frivolous and useless as make up? ! Jesus Christ!
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I was speechless reading this yesterday. This is just too much. You need to leave that witch.
Imagine her saying she will curse another man with the sperm he poured inside her. Ewwww!! Your own 'wife' has now become a sperm reservoir for public use. And to men wey no even send her sef. See as the man curse am back. What a shame. I don't know how people do it sha.
You also allowed her take your job away from you. How could you not go to work for 3 days? In a bank o, where you have to account for every single minute. That first day, you should have still gone to work knowing there was an important meeting. Even if you were late. That would have been better explained than absconding for 3 days. Anyway, what is done is done.
Then how come you still went ahead to pay 1 mil house rent after losing your job? You should have left with your child at this point. And even when you didn't, you should have ensured you still have at least 200k left. At least, you won't be drinking watery Oha soup without meat. I pray you find the answers you seek o. God forbid bad thing....
1. She has mental issues. Very close to full blown madness. 2. She an ex cultist 3. She is diabolic 4. She is an unbeliever even though she attends church or rather place of worship. 5. She is stubborn. 6. She is an adulterer 7. She is an opportunist 8. She is dangerously smart and can go any length including murder to achieve her aim. 9.She was not properly brought up even though her parents were pastor. 10. She is not trustworthy. Not fit to raise any child for you. 11. She is a devil in human flesh 12. She is worse than everything I have said.
About your daughter: 1. There is a strong tendency that she is not your daughter. You may need to check to be sure.
About the pastor of the church where you wedded: 1. He is manipulative. 2. He is inexperienced in marital issues 3. He lacks the right qualities to provide spiritual guidance. 4. He is guilty of your wife crimes by association. 5. He is biased and will continue to support your wife for God's known reason. 6. There is something devilishly secretive that connects him and your wife.
About the parents of your wife: 1. They know the truth of their daughter but will never support you publicly. 2. They are praying and hoping that their daughter will change for the better. 3.They feel sorry for you in their closet but can't admit publicly. 4. They are equally baffled and surprised that you are still in this marriage. 5. They are surprised that your parents are so soft in their handling of this issue. 6. Like most parents will always stand by their child pubickly
About your parents: 1. They are soft. 2. Their sense of judgement has been altered by indoctrination rather than by the truth of God's word. 3. They are praying and hopeful that things will get better. 4. They are worse than your wife parents by still supporting u to remain in that house. 5. They are confused and don't really know what to do about this issue. 6. They are expecting God to do something whereas God is expecting them to do the needful.
About you: 1. U are stupid! 2. U are foolish!! 3. U do not value your life. 5. U have what it takes to manage banking operations but alas you cannot manage your home. 5. I don't know your age but you are not ready for marriage. 6. U know how to employ experieced mechanic, plumber, etc to work for u, but unfortunately u don't know how to get experienced pastor to handle your marital issue. Listen not all pastor are qualified to handle most issues they claimed expertise on. 7. You are fearful. 8. You are closer to the grave than u knew. 9. You are senseless. I think u need to buy some sense. 10. For close to four years you have being have being contemplating divorce and yet you still do not know whether it is right or not (Please read Kenneth Hagins book on marriage, divorce and..) 11. You were born into Christian home but u do not take time to study the bible rather u were feeding on the crumbs from here and there. 12. How can a grown up man expect all family members to collaborate with him before sending out a killer out of your house.
If after all this, u still ask what should I do: I will say it is better u commit murder now than allowing your wife to murder u the very next second.
This bros are you really a CHRISTIAN,or just a CHURCH GOER. Change your friends, they are terrible. Stop going to that pastor friend of yours,I can bet his family is no better,else he would have advised you with God given wisdom. Stop calling people to solve your problems.It seems to me everything you had,even the job was given to you on a platter of gold,which is why you did not know how critical the situation was. Imagine you allowing yourself to loose a banking job without anyone sacking you,you just sack yourself. You might deny it to your self,but the chooser makes choice,then the choice makes the chooser. Being a man is not about being violent,it is about not taking things for granted.
Greetings to u all,please I need a candid advise because am fed up and confused at same time.It all started in 2011 when I met my wife through my collegue in the bank. I used to work in operations and hardly have time to truly search for a wife that is what I thought back then.so I had this collegue of mind who appears responsible and is also a church worker in a responsible church,not all these money making churchs.so I confided in him , so one day he came to me that he has this lady where he normally goes to worship atimes that he will take me to meet her ,that she is God fearing ,a church worker and her father is a pastor in one of the northern states,which he did and introduced us and gradually we started dating,
I even took her to see my parent.to their amazement she woke up around 4am and swept and cleaned the house before we could even wake up for morning prayers.when my Dad saw this he was really please and was like this truly is wife material.but my Mum was like don’t conclude oh as per girls of nowadays that we should keep praying.at first I wanted us to do our traditional marriage in April 2012 and after that white wedding but she started indirectly pressuring me that we should do trad in August and white in November,2011.i thot about it,and with my naïve mind said to myself that since she seems nice and am ready to marry.
I agreed and we got married in 2011.we did both court and church marriage.immediatly we came back from honey moon my life has been one hell of a life or another.it began when my former collegue in the bank sent her sister to bring her cv to me incase we are recruiting so that I can submit for her.so the lady called later to thank me for the assistance and my wife was with me in the sitting room.it was around 7-8pm.after the call my wife started quarreling,that who is that lady calling me that am cheating on her,she went inside the room and brought out our wedding cert.that she will tear it and that we should go our separate ways.i became shocked ,I then told her that she can take the lady’s number or I can call the lady in her presence.that I don’t even know the lady. I did not even have the lady number in my phone,the lady collected my number to follow up and that is all.
I left her with my phones and entered the room.this was happening barely a month and a half after our wedding.as the days go by she started bringing different quarrels and problem.after like a year two month into the marriage,one faithful Friday night after I came back from work and I was fast asleep she woke me up around 11pm that we should talk.and I told her that if we can leave it till morning knowing fully well that the next day was satuday unless if the matter is btw life and death then I can wait.she said it is not btw life and death and was insisting that we talk before I knew it she brought out a knife and wanted to stab me so I manage to collect the knife and threw it into the wordrobe.
By then the sleep in my eyes cleared immediately and I was like what is the matter what is wrong or what wrong have I done to her,my people up till tofday she has not given me an answer.so she stood there speechless so I assume all is well then as I was going tom bed she took one of her high heel and struck me behind my head I fell down and went blank.after a while I woke up and saw her looking at me.so I got up and entered my car with blood all over me to her uncle’s house and showed them and told them what happened.before I continue we live in Abj,so the uncle called her parent and her mum came to Abj the next day.before then I had written and taken my divorce letter to the pastor that am not doing again.
After that the pastor and her people intervened and talked to her. I went to that my colleague that introduced her to me that what does he know about her that I may not know so he said she told him in confidence that she was in cult in the university and that her boyfriend then was the capon.she also told him that the boy friend was shot in school then and died in her arms.when I confronted her she down played everything and wanted to pick a quarrel,so that one died down.
Before I continue,am a banker ,and my wife has a boutique that she sells men wears in Abj. She hardly laughs but b4 we got married she was always laughing.i havs severally asked her what the matter is but she will say it is nothing. Before now I did not know that my wife is a runs girl,after our baby’s birth in Dec 2012 my wife went and did family planning without my consent,it was in the evening when the stuf started disturbing her that I got to know. In August last year that is 2014,I was watching news when she came back by 9:30pm,she started making it a habit of coming late in 2014 and that has caused serious quarrel btw us. So when she came in she droped her phone on the center table and went inside to take her shower.as I was watching the television I now said let me go through her gallery because she likes taking pictures.after that I now checked her messages.i was shocked what I saw.
She sent a text to a married man,saying that she cursed him with the sperm he pured inside her and the man said it was mutual that she is the one came to his house to collect money for the shoes and shirts he bought,he also said he will curse her with his children’s life that she is not the only one that has a child and insisted that it was mutual.at that point my hands started shaking and before I know I she jumped out of the bathroom with soap on her body to take her phone.immediatly she came to the sitting room and saw me with her phone she frozed for like 15seconds not knowing what to say after that I asked her who is the man and she said that I was one of her friends from owerri that used her phone to chat the man.
when I checked the chat history it was not just one day chat it spans four days becos the chat was very lengthy. So I was pissed off, I reported the issue to the pastor where we got married and he down play it that she cannot do such a thing.. My wife has quarreled with all my neighbours in my compound of 8 flat,she has also quarreled with our security guards at the gate to the extent that they have refused to wash her car.On 25 of dec 2014 after returning from the church my wife spreed her cloth under the sun and my neighbour’s puppy came and played with the cloth and tore part of it.the next day she went to tell then but she did not grt a good response so she went behind and boiled hot water and pured on the puppy. My neighbor’s wife went and call police for her the next day being Sunday.but their aim is to keep her in cell till Monday to teach her a lesson.unknown to them my uncle is a top police officer so I called him and we were able to bail her putting Monday date.since then small thing my wife will start saying things that she is suspecting me , that am having am affair.i now told her how,she now said a man that does not drink alcohol and does not smoke will surely womanise.i then asure her that I have done nothing of such.and truly since I married her four years ago I have never looked at any woman aside her.
To cut a long stry short,February this year as usual during valentine I to her to a shop and asked her to pick whatever she wants.then she picked cloths and shoes worth 70k and I paid. After that February ending I usually give her 50k for upkeep so tha day I had keep the 50k but there was a plumbing problem that I had to take 5k out of it to solve so I gave her 45k promising to bring the balance home or I credit her,and that faithful morning we were having a meeting in which a top official is coming from head office and my head of operations was nor around so I was sitting in for her.
so I asked my wife to help me take our daughter to sch that day as I have to rush to the office b4 time. After giving my wife the 45k she threw it on the floor that it is not enough and started insulting me that what kind of useless job is that ,unknown to me she had gone and locked the entrance door and taken the key,as I was about to go out I discovered that the door was lock,so I called her aunte to talk to her,as she was on the phone with the aunt I went through the back door. As I was about to drive out I saw my wife rushing to close the gate with only pant and singlet,I mean pant and singlet not bump hort or rapper.i was surprise,but before she could close the gate I had already passed she now took a big stone and stared running after the car. she threw the stone at my suv ,it sounded like a bomb very loud.at first I did not know what happened untill I saw her running towards the car so I stoped,she now came held my side mirrow and started breaking it so I had to drive off. I was devasted and could not make it to work,so I called someone in the office that I won’st be able to make it to the office that am having some issues at home.
She went back to the house and called my Dad that if I come back she will kill me.so my Dad called me and I explained to him immediately what happened. so he said I should not go back home that day, I went and slept in a hotel In town .so the next day her mum came and I went home.Now it is not that am afraid of her but because I respect women and will not want to beat ofr fight her,I am far biger and taller than her if I decide to cough she will vanish so is not that am afraid of her am only respecting the marriage institution. When I got home the second day to resume work the third day I discovered that she had tore all my cloths,my shirt both office and casuals,all my suit including my wedding suit,.so I had nothing to wear the next day.so I missed work wednesdy,Thursday and Friday,during all these happening I have been in touch with my office and told them am having some family issues and could not make it to work.
I resumed the next Monday to work and everything seem to be going well, then on Tuesday I got a sack letter from human resources of the bank.unkonwn to me. the new manager that was posted to my branch got a querry for myself and the head of operations not being around for the initial meeting. so he was angry and he wrote to the bank’s human resources and when they checked that I was not logged on for the three days I was sacked,all because of my wife.most times she sends abusive texts messages to me while in the office.For instance if am attending to customers and she is calling and I did not pick on time she will now send a nasty text that I delibertly don”t want to pick her calls.i have even told her to come and see how we work in my office.so since march am yet to get any serious thing to do. I January I had 2.5m I paid our rent 1m and part pay for a land 1m and the remaining 500k lasted us from march till june.as usual with banks I was not paid anything.so when my savings finished in june the major financial burden fell on her,with little coming from me now.Since then my wife has made my life a living hell with all sorts of insult. For example in November,there was nothing in the house so she went to southern fries and bought rice and chicken for herself,then bought a watery oha soup with out meat that I should make garri and eat with it.it was when I wanted to microwave it that I discovered that it was watery and has no meat.i did not say anything.
Most times I stay back at home unless I have an appointment or an interview just not to spend unnecessary .so I was checking one of the cupboard in our room and I saw somethings she got from a native doctor,they include a bottle of concosion with the label witches and wizards destroying oil,the second one was two of her bathing soap with burnt candle on it when I looked at the soap closely I saw small cross buried inside,the third thing I saw was the complimentary card of the native doctor.All these things I just mentioned are real and I have their pictures that I snapped.i picked them and went to her uncle’S place to show him and he was mad,he immediately called her parent to come to Abj immediately and I called my parent to come becos I told them I don’t want the marriage again. Both parties came and the meeting lasted from 5pm to 12 mid nite and continued again the next day.
she could not defend her sellf and I said am not doing again and everyone started beging that I should give her one more chance.and it seems the issues was resolved.i started my investigation and discovered that unknown to me my wife is a runs girl even b4 I married her and after marriage she continued .that is why she went and did family planning without my knowledge so that she can be sleeping with me with out condom.and this days she dresses sugestivly.i have reported to the pastor ,her parent about her dressing but she has not changed.presently she is fighting with a lady in her former church the lady is a leader in the church.she said the lady has been attacking her in the dream and anytime they lady sees her the lady calls her prostitute.She told me that the lady is sleeping with her pastor.My wife has bad mouth and insult at every provocation,she hadly laughs always moody but when some kind of men call her she will be laughing as if tomorrow no dey.
Today being Christmas as we were preparing to go to church,she was noW feeding our daughter who just turned 3 last week.becos the baby was being slow to eat she started shouting that if the baby does not eat quikly that she will injure her.when I heard that I came and told her that such statement to a baby is not good,I have cautioned her severally not to be telling the baby that she will injure her.because there was a day I was playing with our baby and the baby was telling me that she will injure me.so becos of that I cautioned her.that was all,instead of her to take corrections she started insulting me.that am useless,that the whole burden is on her that she regrets marrying me.that she will surprise me one of these days.
My dear brothers and sisters in the house especially the married ones I frankly need ur candid advise as I am tired of her ,her bad and unrepentant character and her evil ways but am only looking at the term Christian marriage in terms of divorce as I ultimately want to make heaven just as every one.
Thank u for taking ur time to go through my ordeal.
hmmmmmM! I was able 2 read all ur story line. Well am nt married yet. D kind of comnt I wil gve u now is dat, I tink I wil blame u 4 evrytin bcus u saw a stone cumn @ ur 2 naked eye's, u wia still standn 4 d stone 2 blind ur eye's. Nt all dat glitar's Rr gold. Bcus of ur wife u Rr goin 2ru hell. Well I wudt say much here @ all bcus am angri, u even lost ur job bcus of her. My advice is dis pls divorce her quickly, she dos nt want ur progress, I know GOD dos nt encourage divorce bt tell GOD u want 2 divorce her period....
You had to quote everything for you to offer no feasible advice, how can you advice someone suffering to make a mad woman come to post her side
That's his own version. I'd like to hear the other side. The is two sides to every story. He has painted this woman like a devil and himself like a saint. Untill I hear from his wife, idonbelieveit!
OP, to be frank with you, You seem not to have done much background check on the Lady before tieing the knot.
She might have be getting very hot/wicked sex session with her former boyfriends and getting into the marriage, your performance to her was not what she can tolerate, it drives most ladies mad.
Most ladies that are sexually active turn "kolomental" whenever they are not getting enough sex.
I have a friend that works with Shell BP in PH, he married a classy lady we run things for campus because she is beautiful without considering that he is a gentle n quite guy. Omo, the girl is giving my guy hell, organizing parties every now n then in his house with her akata friends. Mind you, my guys is always on rig, working out himself to keep d babe standard. They hv been on it for 4 years now and my guy is looking 15 years older.
My advise to young men is to always observe the kind of friends your partner or wife keeps or use to have, It will help u in defining your partner character and trait.
Greetings to u all,please I need a candid advise because am fed up and confused at same time.It all started in 2011 when I met my wife through my collegue in the bank. I used to work in operations and hardly have time to truly search for a wife that is what I thought back then.so I had this collegue of mind who appears responsible and is also a church worker in a responsible church,not all these money making churchs.so I confided in him , so one day he came to me that he has this lady where he normally goes to worship atimes that he will take me to meet her ,that she is God fearing ,a church worker and her father is a pastor in one of the northern states,which he did and introduced us and gradually we started dating,
I even took her to see my parent.to their amazement she woke up around 4am and swept and cleaned the house before we could even wake up for morning prayers.when my Dad saw this he was really please and was like this truly is wife material.but my Mum was like don’t conclude oh as per girls of nowadays that we should keep praying.at first I wanted us to do our traditional marriage in April 2012 and after that white wedding but she started indirectly pressuring me that we should do trad in August and white in November,2011.i thot about it,and with my naïve mind said to myself that since she seems nice and am ready to marry.
I agreed and we got married in 2011.we did both court and church marriage.immediatly we came back from honey moon my life has been one hell of a life or another.it began when my former collegue in the bank sent her sister to bring her cv to me incase we are recruiting so that I can submit for her.so the lady called later to thank me for the assistance and my wife was with me in the sitting room.it was around 7-8pm.after the call my wife started quarreling,that who is that lady calling me that am cheating on her,she went inside the room and brought out our wedding cert.that she will tear it and that we should go our separate ways.i became shocked ,I then told her that she can take the lady’s number or I can call the lady in her presence.that I don’t even know the lady. I did not even have the lady number in my phone,the lady collected my number to follow up and that is all.
I left her with my phones and entered the room.this was happening barely a month and a half after our wedding.as the days go by she started bringing different quarrels and problem.after like a year two month into the marriage,one faithful Friday night after I came back from work and I was fast asleep she woke me up around 11pm that we should talk.and I told her that if we can leave it till morning knowing fully well that the next day was satuday unless if the matter is btw life and death then I can wait.she said it is not btw life and death and was insisting that we talk before I knew it she brought out a knife and wanted to stab me so I manage to collect the knife and threw it into the wordrobe.
By then the sleep in my eyes cleared immediately and I was like what is the matter what is wrong or what wrong have I done to her,my people up till tofday she has not given me an answer.so she stood there speechless so I assume all is well then as I was going tom bed she took one of her high heel and struck me behind my head I fell down and went blank.after a while I woke up and saw her looking at me.so I got up and entered my car with blood all over me to her uncle’s house and showed them and told them what happened.before I continue we live in Abj,so the uncle called her parent and her mum came to Abj the next day.before then I had written and taken my divorce letter to the pastor that am not doing again.
After that the pastor and her people intervened and talked to her. I went to that my colleague that introduced her to me that what does he know about her that I may not know so he said she told him in confidence that she was in cult in the university and that her boyfriend then was the capon.she also told him that the boy friend was shot in school then and died in her arms.when I confronted her she down played everything and wanted to pick a quarrel,so that one died down.
Before I continue,am a banker ,and my wife has a boutique that she sells men wears in Abj. She hardly laughs but b4 we got married she was always laughing.i havs severally asked her what the matter is but she will say it is nothing. Before now I did not know that my wife is a runs girl,after our baby’s birth in Dec 2012 my wife went and did family planning without my consent,it was in the evening when the stuf started disturbing her that I got to know. In August last year that is 2014,I was watching news when she came back by 9:30pm,she started making it a habit of coming late in 2014 and that has caused serious quarrel btw us. So when she came in she droped her phone on the center table and went inside to take her shower.as I was watching the television I now said let me go through her gallery because she likes taking pictures.after that I now checked her messages.i was shocked what I saw.
She sent a text to a married man,saying that she cursed him with the sperm he pured inside her and the man said it was mutual that she is the one came to his house to collect money for the shoes and shirts he bought,he also said he will curse her with his children’s life that she is not the only one that has a child and insisted that it was mutual.at that point my hands started shaking and before I know I she jumped out of the bathroom with soap on her body to take her phone.immediatly she came to the sitting room and saw me with her phone she frozed for like 15seconds not knowing what to say after that I asked her who is the man and she said that I was one of her friends from owerri that used her phone to chat the man.
when I checked the chat history it was not just one day chat it spans four days becos the chat was very lengthy. So I was pissed off, I reported the issue to the pastor where we got married and he down play it that she cannot do such a thing.. My wife has quarreled with all my neighbours in my compound of 8 flat,she has also quarreled with our security guards at the gate to the extent that they have refused to wash her car.On 25 of dec 2014 after returning from the church my wife spreed her cloth under the sun and my neighbour’s puppy came and played with the cloth and tore part of it.the next day she went to tell then but she did not grt a good response so she went behind and boiled hot water and pured on the puppy. My neighbor’s wife went and call police for her the next day being Sunday.but their aim is to keep her in cell till Monday to teach her a lesson.unknown to them my uncle is a top police officer so I called him and we were able to bail her putting Monday date.since then small thing my wife will start saying things that she is suspecting me , that am having am affair.i now told her how,she now said a man that does not drink alcohol and does not smoke will surely womanise.i then asure her that I have done nothing of such.and truly since I married her four years ago I have never looked at any woman aside her.
To cut a long stry short,February this year as usual during valentine I to her to a shop and asked her to pick whatever she wants.then she picked cloths and shoes worth 70k and I paid. After that February ending I usually give her 50k for upkeep so tha day I had keep the 50k but there was a plumbing problem that I had to take 5k out of it to solve so I gave her 45k promising to bring the balance home or I credit her,and that faithful morning we were having a meeting in which a top official is coming from head office and my head of operations was nor around so I was sitting in for her.
so I asked my wife to help me take our daughter to sch that day as I have to rush to the office b4 time. After giving my wife the 45k she threw it on the floor that it is not enough and started insulting me that what kind of useless job is that ,unknown to me she had gone and locked the entrance door and taken the key,as I was about to go out I discovered that the door was lock,so I called her aunte to talk to her,as she was on the phone with the aunt I went through the back door. As I was about to drive out I saw my wife rushing to close the gate with only pant and singlet,I mean pant and singlet not bump hort or rapper.i was surprise,but before she could close the gate I had already passed she now took a big stone and stared running after the car. she threw the stone at my suv ,it sounded like a bomb very loud.at first I did not know what happened untill I saw her running towards the car so I stoped,she now came held my side mirrow and started breaking it so I had to drive off. I was devasted and could not make it to work,so I called someone in the office that I won’st be able to make it to the office that am having some issues at home.
She went back to the house and called my Dad that if I come back she will kill me.so my Dad called me and I explained to him immediately what happened. so he said I should not go back home that day, I went and slept in a hotel In town .so the next day her mum came and I went home.Now it is not that am afraid of her but because I respect women and will not want to beat ofr fight her,I am far biger and taller than her if I decide to cough she will vanish so is not that am afraid of her am only respecting the marriage institution. When I got home the second day to resume work the third day I discovered that she had tore all my cloths,my shirt both office and casuals,all my suit including my wedding suit,.so I had nothing to wear the next day.so I missed work wednesdy,Thursday and Friday,during all these happening I have been in touch with my office and told them am having some family issues and could not make it to work.
I resumed the next Monday to work and everything seem to be going well, then on Tuesday I got a sack letter from human resources of the bank.unkonwn to me. the new manager that was posted to my branch got a querry for myself and the head of operations not being around for the initial meeting. so he was angry and he wrote to the bank’s human resources and when they checked that I was not logged on for the three days I was sacked,all because of my wife.most times she sends abusive texts messages to me while in the office.For instance if am attending to customers and she is calling and I did not pick on time she will now send a nasty text that I delibertly don”t want to pick her calls.i have even told her to come and see how we work in my office.so since march am yet to get any serious thing to do. I January I had 2.5m I paid our rent 1m and part pay for a land 1m and the remaining 500k lasted us from march till june.as usual with banks I was not paid anything.so when my savings finished in june the major financial burden fell on her,with little coming from me now.Since then my wife has made my life a living hell with all sorts of insult. For example in November,there was nothing in the house so she went to southern fries and bought rice and chicken for herself,then bought a watery oha soup with out meat that I should make garri and eat with it.it was when I wanted to microwave it that I discovered that it was watery and has no meat.i did not say anything.
Most times I stay back at home unless I have an appointment or an interview just not to spend unnecessary .so I was checking one of the cupboard in our room and I saw somethings she got from a native doctor,they include a bottle of concosion with the label witches and wizards destroying oil,the second one was two of her bathing soap with burnt candle on it when I looked at the soap closely I saw small cross buried inside,the third thing I saw was the complimentary card of the native doctor.All these things I just mentioned are real and I have their pictures that I snapped.i picked them and went to her uncle’S place to show him and he was mad,he immediately called her parent to come to Abj immediately and I called my parent to come becos I told them I don’t want the marriage again. Both parties came and the meeting lasted from 5pm to 12 mid nite and continued again the next day.
she could not defend her sellf and I said am not doing again and everyone started beging that I should give her one more chance.and it seems the issues was resolved.i started my investigation and discovered that unknown to me my wife is a runs girl even b4 I married her and after marriage she continued .that is why she went and did family planning without my knowledge so that she can be sleeping with me with out condom.and this days she dresses sugestivly.i have reported to the pastor ,her parent about her dressing but she has not changed.presently she is fighting with a lady in her former church the lady is a leader in the church.she said the lady has been attacking her in the dream and anytime they lady sees her the lady calls her prostitute.She told me that the lady is sleeping with her pastor.My wife has bad mouth and insult at every provocation,she hadly laughs always moody but when some kind of men call her she will be laughing as if tomorrow no dey.
Today being Christmas as we were preparing to go to church,she was noW feeding our daughter who just turned 3 last week.becos the baby was being slow to eat she started shouting that if the baby does not eat quikly that she will injure her.when I heard that I came and told her that such statement to a baby is not good,I have cautioned her severally not to be telling the baby that she will injure her.because there was a day I was playing with our baby and the baby was telling me that she will injure me.so becos of that I cautioned her.that was all,instead of her to take corrections she started insulting me.that am useless,that the whole burden is on her that she regrets marrying me.that she will surprise me one of these days.
My dear brothers and sisters in the house especially the married ones I frankly need ur candid advise as I am tired of her ,her bad and unrepentant character and her evil ways but am only looking at the term Christian marriage in terms of divorce as I ultimately want to make heaven just as every one.
Thank u for taking ur time to go through my ordeal.
To be frank... You no know wetin u dey do...
Your story dey vex person too much.. E get stage wey I go consult pastor ontop this kind matter wey be say I go tell the pastor... Oga! E be like say u dey madt lyk my wife..
Ask yourself if that your pastor were going thru wat u were going thru in his house, do u think he would do wat u are doing?
And yet here you are running to meet him every now and den... Wetin u want make do for u.. Make im drive the legion of demons wey dey worry your wife commot.?
Your Friend no try for u... Your pastor no try for you, your in laws no try for you, your parents did not do enuf for u... The list is endless...
U spose don dump the yeye woman since before u lose ur job or opted for separation and relocate or even before you born pikin... Buh u didn't.. Thinking love love would pay you..
Dey didn't tell u love is broke... Am gonna tell u wat reality told me.. Love with your balls, think with your brain and heart..
U unfortunately are doing the opposite...
What is done is done.. Am sure u know by now that the sun doesn't set when it's tym hasn't come.. Pack all the things u have in your house including that of your kid.. Wait for the day ur wife is out.. And move the f**** out.
Don't tell ur mumu pastor, or your friend or your in laws or your parents..
Greetings to u all,please I need a candid advise because am fed up and confused at same time.It all started in 2011 when I met my wife through my collegue in the bank. I used to work in operations and hardly have time to truly search for a wife that is what I thought back then.so I had this collegue of mind who appears responsible and is also a church worker in a responsible church,not all these money making churchs.so I confided in him , so one day he came to me that he has this lady where he normally goes to worship atimes that he will take me to meet her ,that she is God fearing ,a church worker and her father is a pastor in one of the northern states,which he did and introduced us and gradually we started dating,
I even took her to see my parent.to their amazement she woke up around 4am and swept and cleaned the house before we could even wake up for morning prayers.when my Dad saw this he was really please and was like this truly is wife material.but my Mum was like don’t conclude oh as per girls of nowadays that we should keep praying.at first I wanted us to do our traditional marriage in April 2012 and after that white wedding but she started indirectly pressuring me that we should do trad in August and white in November,2011.i thot about it,and with my naïve mind said to myself that since she seems nice and am ready to marry.
I agreed and we got married in 2011.we did both court and church marriage.immediatly we came back from honey moon my life has been one hell of a life or another.it began when my former collegue in the bank sent her sister to bring her cv to me incase we are recruiting so that I can submit for her.so the lady called later to thank me for the assistance and my wife was with me in the sitting room.it was around 7-8pm.after the call my wife started quarreling,that who is that lady calling me that am cheating on her,she went inside the room and brought out our wedding cert.that she will tear it and that we should go our separate ways.i became shocked ,I then told her that she can take the lady’s number or I can call the lady in her presence.that I don’t even know the lady. I did not even have the lady number in my phone,the lady collected my number to follow up and that is all.
I left her with my phones and entered the room.this was happening barely a month and a half after our wedding.as the days go by she started bringing different quarrels and problem.after like a year two month into the marriage,one faithful Friday night after I came back from work and I was fast asleep she woke me up around 11pm that we should talk.and I told her that if we can leave it till morning knowing fully well that the next day was satuday unless if the matter is btw life and death then I can wait.she said it is not btw life and death and was insisting that we talk before I knew it she brought out a knife and wanted to stab me so I manage to collect the knife and threw it into the wordrobe.
By then the sleep in my eyes cleared immediately and I was like what is the matter what is wrong or what wrong have I done to her,my people up till tofday she has not given me an answer.so she stood there speechless so I assume all is well then as I was going tom bed she took one of her high heel and struck me behind my head I fell down and went blank.after a while I woke up and saw her looking at me.so I got up and entered my car with blood all over me to her uncle’s house and showed them and told them what happened.before I continue we live in Abj,so the uncle called her parent and her mum came to Abj the next day.before then I had written and taken my divorce letter to the pastor that am not doing again.
After that the pastor and her people intervened and talked to her. I went to that my colleague that introduced her to me that what does he know about her that I may not know so he said she told him in confidence that she was in cult in the university and that her boyfriend then was the capon.she also told him that the boy friend was shot in school then and died in her arms.when I confronted her she down played everything and wanted to pick a quarrel,so that one died down.
Before I continue,am a banker ,and my wife has a boutique that she sells men wears in Abj. She hardly laughs but b4 we got married she was always laughing.i havs severally asked her what the matter is but she will say it is nothing. Before now I did not know that my wife is a runs girl,after our baby’s birth in Dec 2012 my wife went and did family planning without my consent,it was in the evening when the stuf started disturbing her that I got to know. In August last year that is 2014,I was watching news when she came back by 9:30pm,she started making it a habit of coming late in 2014 and that has caused serious quarrel btw us. So when she came in she droped her phone on the center table and went inside to take her shower.as I was watching the television I now said let me go through her gallery because she likes taking pictures.after that I now checked her messages.i was shocked what I saw.
She sent a text to a married man,saying that she cursed him with the sperm he pured inside her and the man said it was mutual that she is the one came to his house to collect money for the shoes and shirts he bought,he also said he will curse her with his children’s life that she is not the only one that has a child and insisted that it was mutual.at that point my hands started shaking and before I know I she jumped out of the bathroom with soap on her body to take her phone.immediatly she came to the sitting room and saw me with her phone she frozed for like 15seconds not knowing what to say after that I asked her who is the man and she said that I was one of her friends from owerri that used her phone to chat the man.
when I checked the chat history it was not just one day chat it spans four days becos the chat was very lengthy. So I was pissed off, I reported the issue to the pastor where we got married and he down play it that she cannot do such a thing.. My wife has quarreled with all my neighbours in my compound of 8 flat,she has also quarreled with our security guards at the gate to the extent that they have refused to wash her car.On 25 of dec 2014 after returning from the church my wife spreed her cloth under the sun and my neighbour’s puppy came and played with the cloth and tore part of it.the next day she went to tell then but she did not grt a good response so she went behind and boiled hot water and pured on the puppy. My neighbor’s wife went and call police for her the next day being Sunday.but their aim is to keep her in cell till Monday to teach her a lesson.unknown to them my uncle is a top police officer so I called him and we were able to bail her putting Monday date.since then small thing my wife will start saying things that she is suspecting me , that am having am affair.i now told her how,she now said a man that does not drink alcohol and does not smoke will surely womanise.i then asure her that I have done nothing of such.and truly since I married her four years ago I have never looked at any woman aside her.
To cut a long stry short,February this year as usual during valentine I to her to a shop and asked her to pick whatever she wants.then she picked cloths and shoes worth 70k and I paid. After that February ending I usually give her 50k for upkeep so tha day I had keep the 50k but there was a plumbing problem that I had to take 5k out of it to solve so I gave her 45k promising to bring the balance home or I credit her,and that faithful morning we were having a meeting in which a top official is coming from head office and my head of operations was nor around so I was sitting in for her.
so I asked my wife to help me take our daughter to sch that day as I have to rush to the office b4 time. After giving my wife the 45k she threw it on the floor that it is not enough and started insulting me that what kind of useless job is that ,unknown to me she had gone and locked the entrance door and taken the key,as I was about to go out I discovered that the door was lock,so I called her aunte to talk to her,as she was on the phone with the aunt I went through the back door. As I was about to drive out I saw my wife rushing to close the gate with only pant and singlet,I mean pant and singlet not bump hort or rapper.i was surprise,but before she could close the gate I had already passed she now took a big stone and stared running after the car. she threw the stone at my suv ,it sounded like a bomb very loud.at first I did not know what happened untill I saw her running towards the car so I stoped,she now came held my side mirrow and started breaking it so I had to drive off. I was devasted and could not make it to work,so I called someone in the office that I won’st be able to make it to the office that am having some issues at home.
She went back to the house and called my Dad that if I come back she will kill me.so my Dad called me and I explained to him immediately what happened. so he said I should not go back home that day, I went and slept in a hotel In town .so the next day her mum came and I went home.Now it is not that am afraid of her but because I respect women and will not want to beat ofr fight her,I am far biger and taller than her if I decide to cough she will vanish so is not that am afraid of her am only respecting the marriage institution. When I got home the second day to resume work the third day I discovered that she had tore all my cloths,my shirt both office and casuals,all my suit including my wedding suit,.so I had nothing to wear the next day.so I missed work wednesdy,Thursday and Friday,during all these happening I have been in touch with my office and told them am having some family issues and could not make it to work.
I resumed the next Monday to work and everything seem to be going well, then on Tuesday I got a sack letter from human resources of the bank.unkonwn to me. the new manager that was posted to my branch got a querry for myself and the head of operations not being around for the initial meeting. so he was angry and he wrote to the bank’s human resources and when they checked that I was not logged on for the three days I was sacked,all because of my wife.most times she sends abusive texts messages to me while in the office.For instance if am attending to customers and she is calling and I did not pick on time she will now send a nasty text that I delibertly don”t want to pick her calls.i have even told her to come and see how we work in my office.so since march am yet to get any serious thing to do. I January I had 2.5m I paid our rent 1m and part pay for a land 1m and the remaining 500k lasted us from march till june.as usual with banks I was not paid anything.so when my savings finished in june the major financial burden fell on her,with little coming from me now.Since then my wife has made my life a living hell with all sorts of insult. For example in November,there was nothing in the house so she went to southern fries and bought rice and chicken for herself,then bought a watery oha soup with out meat that I should make garri and eat with it.it was when I wanted to microwave it that I discovered that it was watery and has no meat.i did not say anything.
Most times I stay back at home unless I have an appointment or an interview just not to spend unnecessary .so I was checking one of the cupboard in our room and I saw somethings she got from a native doctor,they include a bottle of concosion with the label witches and wizards destroying oil,the second one was two of her bathing soap with burnt candle on it when I looked at the soap closely I saw small cross buried inside,the third thing I saw was the complimentary card of the native doctor.All these things I just mentioned are real and I have their pictures that I snapped.i picked them and went to her uncle’S place to show him and he was mad,he immediately called her parent to come to Abj immediately and I called my parent to come becos I told them I don’t want the marriage again. Both parties came and the meeting lasted from 5pm to 12 mid nite and continued again the next day.
she could not defend her sellf and I said am not doing again and everyone started beging that I should give her one more chance.and it seems the issues was resolved.i started my investigation and discovered that unknown to me my wife is a runs girl even b4 I married her and after marriage she continued .that is why she went and did family planning without my knowledge so that she can be sleeping with me with out condom.and this days she dresses sugestivly.i have reported to the pastor ,her parent about her dressing but she has not changed.presently she is fighting with a lady in her former church the lady is a leader in the church.she said the lady has been attacking her in the dream and anytime they lady sees her the lady calls her prostitute.She told me that the lady is sleeping with her pastor.My wife has bad mouth and insult at every provocation,she hadly laughs always moody but when some kind of men call her she will be laughing as if tomorrow no dey.
Today being Christmas as we were preparing to go to church,she was noW feeding our daughter who just turned 3 last week.becos the baby was being slow to eat she started shouting that if the baby does not eat quikly that she will injure her.when I heard that I came and told her that such statement to a baby is not good,I have cautioned her severally not to be telling the baby that she will injure her.because there was a day I was playing with our baby and the baby was telling me that she will injure me.so becos of that I cautioned her.that was all,instead of her to take corrections she started insulting me.that am useless,that the whole burden is on her that she regrets marrying me.that she will surprise me one of these days.
My dear brothers and sisters in the house especially the married ones I frankly need ur candid advise as I am tired of her ,her bad and unrepentant character and her evil ways but am only looking at the term Christian marriage in terms of divorce as I ultimately want to make heaven just as every one.
Thank u for taking ur time to go through my ordeal.
OP. I fl ur pain. Buh I av to be sincere wit yhu.
Are u a christian?. Am not talking abt being religious. Do u knw Jesus? Does he knws you?
4rm ur story you wanted to marry 4 a spiritual chch not money taking chch. Hmmm you are obviously not a deep christian
2. Did u pray abt her ... Nope u didn't a frnd did the introduction...
3. Was God ever involved?? .. Nope.. She forced u into it..
4. My bro. First tin.. YOU need JESUS to intervene asaply
Tink abt wat av said nd let's discuss the nxt step
My brother you married an Abuja runs girl. All the character exhibited by your wife reminds me of my ex-girlfriend, the only luck I had was when I pray fervently things usually gets worse between us.I do not advocate divorce but in this case i doubt it if she will ever change.It's not too late prayer solves all problems. God is with you.
... Nope u didn't a frnd did the introduction...