So, after lunch I ran to Nairaland to see what’s up. The first topic I saw was this one, with the title, “Why didn’t you go to church today?”
I thought my reason was the most hilarious, but on seeing the comments, on the topic; challey, I changed my mind. We are going to analyse the top ten answers to that question (in no particular order).

No. 1 Mr. Better
I choose to use ‘better’ instead of ‘gambler’ to show small politeness. So your bet cast therefore no church? Mehn, you need Jesus in your life. Wetin come concern church wey you for go with the slip wey cut? I’m guessing you had like 20 games on that 200 naira slip.

No. 2 Mr. New Generation
This guy totally trips me. I understand the fact that ‘new generation’ pastors are spoiling Christianity, but what about the ‘old generation’ ones them? You can still go to those ones na. And yes, you’re complaining about ‘new generation’ churches and yet you want to start your own. Na wa. You no wan die but you wan go heaven.

You think say e easy. Where e go see money carry him babe out for VAL

No. 3 Mr. Banker

This one is a banker because obviously he has been counting all the money he has been giving as offering since the early days of the apostles. Meanwhile I relate with your other story. But seriously stop counting how much you’ve given to God.

No. 4 Mr. Off Point

Oga, at least you should have read the topic before telling the whole world it’s your bday. Meanwhile at least you have a huge pair of likes for your troubles. PS. There are thousands of registered users on Nairaland, at least 3,000 saw that.

No. 5 My Brother

Yes o. You’re my brother because this is my life. Sundays are the best days of the week because I can just lie in my sheets and check my twitter all morning. At least were you listening to gospel music?

No. 6 Mr. Current Guy
This one is totally a smooth guy. He saw the post about the pastor whose feet didn’t touch the ground during service, and he decided not to go to church today. That means if he didn’t hear that story he would have gone to church today. Continu. (I didn’t spell that wrong).

No. 7 Mr. Two Rounds
Me I’m surprised you could only go two rounds on that girl. Only two? You can do better than that, fam. See, try going to church next Sunday. Maybe God can pity you and dash you small extra stamina. Amen somebody?

No. 8 Mr. Creative
The only reason why I’m not bashing you for that post is that I am a big fan of ASAP Rocky. And I’ll need that your sister’s number. Let’s see what we can do together, stripper and pervert.

No. 9 Mr. No Offering
Simple and short. No stress. You’re not going and it’s because you have no offering money. That means you can still have other money but not for offering. We understand. What we don’t understand is why you put up your two phone numbers for the whole world to see and add you on whatsapp. Na wa. Desperation of the year.

No. 10 The Pastor’s Neighbour
I’m totally laughing right now, because I understand. I used to live close to a church back in the days of Uniport, and every Sunday morning, while the church people were doing praise and worship, I will dance my sorrows away inside my house.
See you next week! And please, comment. It’s not fair.

Lol....nice one bro




check this out: A Sweet Touching Love Story https://strictlyfun./2016/02/14/a-sweet-touching-lovestory/

lol. Thank you.

praizeblog:
Lol....nice one bro

This stupid excuses wont work in u were told to come nd collect money ..even if its jes 10 thaousand naira....no atom of respect for JEHOVAH

N.B'....am not SU

MedicalSamwise:
This stupid excuses wont work in u were told to come nd collect money ..even if its jes 10 thaousand naira....no atom of respect for JEHOVAH

N.B'....am not SU

Sorry what is SU?

Ok

Abosi31:

Sorry what is SU?

its a name dah they call all this spiricoco people

Some people think when they don't go to that they're doing their pastor

someone actually wrote all of dis in a day?? smh

I can use the time of the comment to get their names.

SurefireAsoOke:
I can use the time of the comment to get their names.

Lol. Mr. Detective. Go ahead.

Atheists be like "because there is no God"











May God help them..

Chisos!

I didn't go because my prayers been answered are like pending

So my comment made top 10

Mr Creative

Op thanks for not bashing me.

SurefireAsoOke:
I can use the time of the comment to get their names.

Abi o

LoL