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Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by deturla: 8:23pm On Mar 10, 2016 |
A few months back a friend of mine was unhappy and quite livid, she kept going on and on about how guys are despicable and brainless. I asked what happened and she recounted how a guy she just met on WhatsApp told her plainly that he wanted to have sex with her, he was even explicit as regards how he wanted the sex to go down, (a scene from 50 shades of grey comes to mind ) he wanted an all-night romp. Believe me I had to check the dictionary to know what that meant. In spite of being a guy, I had to agree with her that indeed he was way out of line, why will he ask her for sex when she is not a prostitute?! He hadn’t even asked her out yet! They just met online and she wasn’t even sure how he got her number. I called him a pig, I said he’s a disgrace to all men and frankly condemned what he did but then, I got to think, why is the guy wrong for asking that of her? I know it’s a crazy thing to say but just stick with me for a while here; would it have been better for the guy to pretend like he cares about her? pretend to love her? and pretend sex is not what he really wanted? then atlas, wait till she gives it up and disappears in a flash leaving her heartbroken and alone?. I have not written this piece to validate or encourage such actions but open your mind for a second and think outside the box for a while. About 85% of men from ages of 18-45 are ready and willing to have sex at any time. This same group of men are the ones women expect to be their husbands at some point in life. The problem is, when most sexually charged men see women the first thing that comes to mind isn’t marriage or “ohhhhh see how beautiful her soul is ” neither is it ” wow she’s a woman of great virtue” nah! Here’s what he’s thinking “wow she has kissable lips” or “damn she’s got some great rack” or “oh my God! Look at her butt” and before you know it, he’s already picturing her naked. If such a man were to ask a woman out, he won’t tell her the truth about his intentions of wanting to have sex with her, because really, that’s what his body truly desires. He knows he’s chances of being turned down is high at the first request! that indefinite “No” for an answer! So most guys would rather go through that ‘relationship channel’ in order to get what they want. Let’s face it, she’d be an advocate of romance and so he’ll give it her. Like a rogue on a mission, he’ll keep the deception going on for a while, hiding his true intentions till she finally decides to open the cookie jar. It is possible that after he’s done eating the cookie for a while he starts to think, “hmmm I think I love this girl” or “I am really loving this maybe I’ll stay a while before I move on” the thought could also be “now that I’ve tasted what I’m here for I’m out”. As you can see, what happens after the man gets what he actually want is a probability, now if that’s the case, won’t it save a lot of time, energy, tears and heartbreak if the same guy actually told the woman plain and simple that he wants sex and whatever happens after that is cool? I know you may have this mild irritation and perhaps thinking ‘this writer must probably be the devil!’, but imagine for a second that every guy you’ve dated or encountered actually told you their true intentions; no faking, no lies. Wouldn’t it have helped guide your decisions better? Will you not have made better decisions than when he pretends to be an angel only for your heart to be shattered and you are feeling used? 2 Likes |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by deturla: 8:24pm On Mar 10, 2016 |
Click the link below for the concluding part: http://deedeesblog.com/2016/03/10/my-intentions-your-decision/ 1 Like |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by naijaboiy: 9:36pm On Mar 10, 2016 |
I totally agree with you Op. But the problem is these girls do not prefer it that way. You see to these girls of nowadays, it is better you walk up to them and lie about your feelings for them. Just tell them whatever they want to hear and you will get them so easily. Girls think in the reverse. That is why approaching them and telling them what you want straight up can almost never work(except of course in rare occasions). This is how everything has been programmed to be. I keep telling most of my female friends that no guy ever looks at a girl for the first time and the thought that comes to his mind is to date her right away or love. For a guy, Lust comes before love. He may not have his way with her before the lust transforms into love but in other cases,it is after he has had sex before the love begins to manifest. 5 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by deturla: 10:20pm On Mar 10, 2016 |
naijaboiy: #Gbam |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by BreezyCB(m): 10:35pm On Mar 10, 2016 |
Nice |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by deturla: 11:49pm On Mar 12, 2016 |
BreezyCB: Thanks 1 Like |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 11:55pm On Mar 12, 2016 |
word! |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by refiner(f): 12:24am On Mar 13, 2016 |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 1:03am On Mar 13, 2016 |
[s] naijaboiy:[/s] bro i mean no harm, but i dnt knw any other polite way of telling you this is a load of crap. How can you generalise this way 3 Likes |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 1:08am On Mar 13, 2016 |
refiner:don't you sleep? |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by refiner(f): 7:22am On Mar 13, 2016 |
Jacksparr0w1207:....and how is it ur bizness? |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by NarnieSnyper(m): 7:30am On Mar 13, 2016 |
Mehn, this is the kinda topic i love reading in Romanceland. To me, the OP and Naijaboiy are both right here. That lust comes first b4 love, no be lie. I'm a witness, now i'm a Believer 1 Like |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 8:06am On Mar 13, 2016 |
refiner:It's 'BUSINESS' not 'BISNESS' |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by naijaboiy: 11:37am On Mar 13, 2016 |
ilobasama:Ok. |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by falconey(m): 11:45am On Mar 13, 2016 |
naijaboiy: This is the remark i love the most, and if the love doesn't manifest? Her loss my gain #laughing in ibadan 1 Like |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by refiner(f): 1:13pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
Jacksparr0w1207: lol!....never knew I was talking wif a teacher self! sorry..... so how is that your business |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 1:22pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
refiner:ask me again. One more time |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by deturla: 1:23pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
Jacksparr0w1207: Na wa oh!! |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 1:27pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
deturla:wetin wa sir? |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 1:36pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
Bunch of hypocrites 'After he had sex then love manifest'. yet you all will come online saying Ladies are hoes And all sort of trash Where are your reasonings ? If you want sex without dating why not approach call girls or Sex workers for it. If you see nothing wrong with your way of reason then you should see nothing wrong if a lady tells you ' I want your money and not your love Moreover Is there even a bit of sex morality left in our youths of nowadays ? Gosh!!! |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by chigoizie7(m): 1:39pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
naijaboiy: Gbam. U said it all, Had a thread on this very topic sometime last year or so, I was tongue lashed |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by chigoizie7(m): 1:47pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
Diddyydiva: I know u are pained. When a girl approaches a guy and demands for for money as help or something, it is good for men, even if u say, oga, I need your money, I will give u so so and so thing, it becomes an arrangement. But pretending to love a guy just to get his money is a big scam, men don't subscribe to it @ all. In the same way, A guy approaching a girl and telling him, hey babe, I like ur body, I just want to have a sex with u, this is also an arrangement too. It is left for the girl to say, ok, I like your body too let's do it or I am not interested, or, ok, if u must have sex with me, this is what I am from you in return. But when a guy tries to deceive a girl into having sex with her is also a big scam, and that is what op is pointing @. U might ask me, what happens to the brothels and prostitutes, that men can aswell go their to have sex and pay d bills. I will also ask u what happens to the banks, girls can aswell go their to get loans and den pay interests(bill) too. According to OP, he is just trying to point out that deceit as being bad, weda from guys or from girls, but is using the guys as a case study 3 Likes |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by refiner(f): 2:22pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 2:24pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
refiner:ewu Aba |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by refiner(f): 2:27pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
Jacksparr0w1207: ewu Gambia...isi okpo! |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 2:30pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
refiner:you don start abi? If I start my own now you go begin pee for pant |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 2:37pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
chigoizie7:he shouldn't use guys alone as case study, there is a way to make it balanced without double standard. I am not pained moreover what makes you think I am. Deceit is truly bad , intentions should be let known and it should be by both genders. |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by refiner(f): 2:43pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
Jacksparr0w1207: sharrap dere joor!... isi aki! na u go poo for ur pant!... that's if u can afford one tho! |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by ThuGnificenX: 2:46pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
This is so far the best article this month on romanceland. You are totally correct. |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by Nobody: 2:47pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
refiner:ok |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by refiner(f): 2:54pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
Re: Do Not Paint Me Black Cos I Told You What I Wanted by refiner(f): 2:54pm On Mar 13, 2016 |
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