Ishilove:

O yes I definitely will. I am so...awed by the depth of deep deep words of knowledge.

*sob*

Joseph 1832, come and marry me before I hit 25

skywife:
Dear Nairaland family.

Have been married for a couple of months now and my spouse have been disturbing and threatening me to dispose my sim cards that everything about me needs to change since am now a married woman.He complain alot about frequent calls by my ex,to be sincere I have nothing to do with anyone again since am married and have explain to him but he wouldn't listen.I told him I have other business partners that calls on this same number and one of this line is for business and am well known with it,am scared I might lose some vital businesses or contracts due to this.I told him but all proved aborted.This has been an issue and am fed up.Is it mandatory after I changed name I should also change number? PLZ ADVICE ME

joseph1832:
Babe, I thought we were already married? Or are you filing for divorce?

Ishilove:

It's re-marriage. A re-affirmation of our love

Ishilove:

Then it means you aren't mature enough for marriage. I am married doesn't mean I will automatically alienate the whole world. I am not so insecure that I will start crying blue murder because my husband's ex called him. If they remain friends it isn't a problem, as long as nothing is going on underneath.

xtervaganza:
you mean you're married and still speak with your ex on phone?




You can only try it with the fool you call husband.

byvan03:




Logic is far from the brain you typed that crap from. if cursing out is the only form of conversation you know, sorry I have no deal replying you anymore.

byvan03:

Logic is far from the brain you typed that crap from. if cursing out is the only form of conversation you know, sorry I have no deal replying you anymore.

PresVA:
People making marriage such a big deal...

Someone asked the other day if women should change their signature after marriage, even state of origin

Maybe after marriage, a woman should do a total overhaul? Wonder if marriage makes one a different person ..

Does destroying sim cards stop her from contacting her ex if she wants to? ...

Ishilove:

'incessantly'. That's the keyword there. Personally, I don't mind my husband's exes calling him, but when it becomes too much then there is a big problem. One thing people fail to remember is that their partners are adults. A person who wants to cheat will cheat and no amount of monitoring will change it. The decision not to cheat lies squarely on their shoulders, so even if I tell him 'change your sim', there are still thousands of ways for them to keep communicating.

When it becomes too much, then it is time for us to sit down and evaluate their relationship.

Let me give you an example. A lady came to us for counseling. She and her married ex are planning on cheating because they are yet to get over each other four years after breaking up. When her ex just newly got married, the man's wife who knew how tight they (the ex and her husband) had been before they broke up went to the man's facebook page to delete and block her, deleted her from BBM, blocked the lady from all the man's social media handles.

The man now sent the lady a message that his wife would try to contact her via whatsapp pretending to be him, and that she should play along. Of course she did. When Wifey contacted the lady on whatsapp, she cussed 'him' out and warned 'him' to stay with 'his wife' and leave her alone.

Satisfied, the man's wife blocked her on Whatsapp. So she has been blocked everywhere

But...

Whenever the man is not in town, he unblocks her, chat wetin dem wan chat, deletes it thereafter and blocks her again. On BBM the lady has no DP so the man has secretly readded her, and whenever they chat, they go private so the messages self-destruct after 5 minutes

She came for counseling because her conscience is beginning to prick her.

The wife thought she had taken care of the ex, not knowing that two years after her husband and the powerful ex are still at it.

It isn't about changing the sim, it's changing the mindset.

Acidosis:
You still talk frequently with your ex?



And you're here claiming married woman? Madam you're not a married woman yet.

Ishilove:

Then it means you aren't mature enough for marriage. I am married doesn't mean I will automatically alienate the whole world. I am not so insecure that I will start crying blue murder because my husband's ex called him. If they remain friends it isn't a problem, as long as nothing is going on underneath.

skywife:
Dear Nairalanders,

This room shouldn't entertain insults or any foul language I only seek your advice we are all matured nah.A problem shared is half solve thats what I think and that's why am here.Moreover concerning my ex we don't have any intimacy again since am married, he only calls to know how am doing and he's happily married too and my spouse knows that as well, he only insist I change my number,with your advice have learnt so much.I really appreciate your contribution and advice it has really added peace to marriage may God bless you all!

Dminister:
God knows the very day I catch my wife speaking with her ex on the phone the same day she goes back to her parents.
Arrant nonsense!

tivta:

You are obviously very young...

mctowel01:

I don't think so. I m a guy, and i know a man cannot just remain friends with a woman, investing his time and money on calls, without having other thoughts that come along the way. Besides, Apart from business, what is he even discussing in the calls, that the woman's husband or family members cant?

erico2k2:

spot on, most girls here saying its not necessary to change their numbers when their ex still calls are still single by nature, when you are confronted with such options in real life you will know better.
My wife still kept her number from when she was single, however if I was faced with a situation when ex is calling, I'm sure she won't think twice b4 she change her number and Im very sure she wont even wait for me to ask.Come to think of it, my ex is married why on earth will I wanna call her