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How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her - Romance - Nairaland

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How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Ozoneman: 4:17pm On May 09, 2016
I never really wanted to be in the shoe i am presently but am not feeling alright at all, every palliative measures taken so far have not really given me any sort of relief.

I met my ex 2009 in my 3rd year through her sister, who happens to be a close friend, and love took us off almost instantly to a journey i never expected could come to a sad and painful end. she has been there through the tough times back in school days.

And talking of the tough times, my parents relocated to the east during the period i gained admission in school; those period were the darkest of my life. i only but managed to pay my school fees through my mum savings (the best mum in world) and from thence till i graduated it was a battle feeding, rent paying and all. i had to write exams for fellow students to survive. So she came in when i needed a support and she did supported and i never stopped appreciating her role in my life.

we have been having issues of male-friends and the too-close-for-comfort kinda relationship they shared but she assured it was nothing and after much quarreling and fighting i decided to let go of the issue.

its been seven years now, am now working in a federal government establishment and doing really fine. there were no doubt she was the one i wanted to marry. some weeks ago i planned calling her to tell her it would be next year but i couldn't cos of the confession she made about her fling while in school and before she started her service last year. she had been seeing this guy, a fellow departmental mate, for the past 3years. she said she went for a church program and the message got to her and one of the things she was told was to come to me and confess what she had done.

i have ended the relationship but i find it hard to move on. she has been apologizing and pleading ever since then. i feel she is sincere and truly remorseful but i don't know what to do. Am really flattened out right now. i feel so empty and don't know if i will ever get over this. i have done everything to try move on but to no avail.

please help me someone, anyone. I need a word of strength to my fainting heart. I need help.
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Nobody: 4:22pm On May 09, 2016
I wanna help.... I really do... Wanna give advice.. Ts just too long... embarassed



SaiMIMZY

1 Like

Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by UyiIredia(m): 4:27pm On May 09, 2016
If you've gone on for 7 years without her you've been carrying on without her bro.
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by tosyne2much(m): 4:29pm On May 09, 2016
I'm not a relationship expert but lemme try to say something sha

I know many people will say you should forgive her but what's the essence of accepting her back when you know you will keep reminiscing about her misdeeds? I mean what's the essence of accepting her back when you know deep within yourself that you can no longer trust her like you used to


Let me tell you something, don't be too spiritual about this issue, do what your heart can take not because you want to prove to people that you're indeed a MAN.. And remember, the fact that someone makes an outright confession does not automatically qualify that person to restoration point. Of course you can forgive her from your heart but still call the relationship a quit if you know the though it will always trouble your mind

Follow what your heart can take bro, not because you want to prove to the world that you're a MAN


Where common sense will work, prayer will not

9 Likes 4 Shares

Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by ErnieSmallzz(f): 4:32pm On May 09, 2016
Seven what? shocked..... Geeeez thatz way 2 long! Op 4give her please, am sure she has really learnt her mistake. embarassed.. You shud b rily proud of her, koz not all girl's will find the courage to tell their bf they cheated on him, only few will.. smiley
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Mediapace: 4:48pm On May 09, 2016
Nice one Tosyne,@ozoneman,all you have to do is to forgive her but you just have to prolong your quarrel with her for her to know she made a mistake.
In this life we are all bound to make mistakes,since she confessed to you and apologized.
FORGIVE & FORGET

All you need is too SEEK GOD'S help on your relationship,go and meet a pastor/Alfa for better counseling.

tosyne2much:
Cc

Me.diapace
The.SonOfMark
Vizki.z
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Jamean(f): 4:51pm On May 09, 2016
hmmm!
Since you can't move on.. move backwards na undecided
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by lawrenzooo: 5:08pm On May 09, 2016
We all make mistakes and somehow others had to make that tough decision of forgiving us.

I want to believe u know urself better! If u d type that can forgive and forget please do forgive her and move on with ur relationship how ever if u d type of guy that brings issues from the past to hurt the present then I suggest you both go ur separate way. But then I believe we all deserve a second chance moreover one way or the other we all cheat.
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by lawrenzooo: 5:09pm On May 09, 2016
If I may ask after 7 years without her or after 7 years with her
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by skywalker888(f): 5:16pm On May 09, 2016
lawrenzooo:
We all make mistakes and somehow others had to make that tough decision of forgiving us.

I want to believe u know urself better! If u d type that can forgive and forget please do forgive her and move on with ur relationship how ever if u d type of guy that brings issues from the past to hurt the present then I suggest you both go ur separate way. But then I believe we all deserve a second chance moreover one way or the other we all cheat.
On thing about most guys is that they hardly forgive a cheating partner, it doesn't matter whether you confessed.. Even if he forgives her, the lady will always irks him each time he remembers the whole thing

A relationship without trust is dead

1 Like

Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by gamaliel121(m): 5:36pm On May 09, 2016
Ozoneman:
I never really wanted to be in the shoe i am presently but am not feeling alright at all, every palliative measures taken so far have not really given me any sort of relief.

I met my ex 2009 in my 3rd year through her sister, who happens to be a close friend, and love took us off almost instantly to a journey i never expected could come to a sad and painful end. she has been there through the tough times back in school days.

And talking of the tough times, my parents relocated to the east during the period i gained admission in school; those period were the darkest of my life. i only but managed to pay my school fees through my mum savings (the best mum in world) and from thence till i graduated it was a battle feeding, rent paying and all. i had to write exams for fellow students to survive. So she came in when i needed a support and she did supported and i never stopped appreciating her role in my life.

we have been having issues of male-friends and the too-close-for-comfort kinda relationship they shared but she assured it was nothing and after much quarreling and fighting i decided to let go of the issue.

its been seven years now, am now working in a federal government establishment and doing really fine. there were no doubt she was the one i wanted to marry. some weeks ago i planned calling her to tell her it would be next year but i couldn't cos of the confession she made about her fling while in school and before she started her service last year. she had been seeing this guy, a fellow departmental mate, for the past 3years. she said she went for a church program and the message got to her and one of the things she was told was to come to me and confess what she had done.

i have ended the relationship but i find it hard to move on. she has been apologizing and pleading ever since then. i feel she is sincere and truly remorseful but i don't know what to do. Am really flattened out right now. i feel so empty and don't know if i will ever get over this. i have done everything to try move on but to no avail.

please help me someone, anyone. I need a word of strength to my fainting heart. I need help.




Bro free that bitchhhh.....ppl dat cheat never change!!!
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by johnson232: 5:48pm On May 09, 2016
ErnieSmallzz:
Seven what? shocked..... Geeeez thatz way 2 long! Op 4give her please, am sure she has really learnt her mistake. embarassed.. You shud b rily proud of her, koz not all girl's will find the courage to tell their bf they cheated on him, only few will.. smiley
there is nothing to be proud of, she is a cheat...

whether she open up or not, sooner or later the op would have still find out...

1 Like

Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Nobody: 5:49pm On May 09, 2016
kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss


slyIsaac:
I wanna help.... I really do... Wanna give advice.. Ts just too long... embarassed



SaiMIM,ZY
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by lawrenzooo: 6:28pm On May 09, 2016
skywalker888:
On thing about most guys is that they hardly forgive a cheating partner, it doesn't matter whether you confessed.. Even if he forgives her, the lady will always irks him each time he remembers the whole thing

A relationship without trust is dead
Yeah u very correct for most guy it's easier to pass a camel through the mouth of a needle than to get them to forgive a cheating partner. However there some few guys out there who can do it and I sincerely pray his one of them cause 7 years is no joke. Now I understand why so ladies would say they cannot stay in a relationship for more than 2year! Just pray the guy put her in consideration while making his decision.
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by refiner(f): 6:30pm On May 09, 2016
.... I don't really know what to type!
well,follow your heart!
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by 2goodbobo(m): 6:37pm On May 09, 2016
He without sin should cast the first stone. If you had never cheated on her while dating her then move on if you can't handle the thought but if you had cheated then forgive her and take her back.
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Ozoneman: 6:43pm On May 09, 2016
UyiIredia:
If you've gone on for 7 years without her you've been carrying on without her bro.

Maybe it should have been how to carry on after seven years of relatnship
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Ozoneman: 6:47pm On May 09, 2016
lawrenzooo:
If I may ask after 7 years without her or after 7 years with her

After 7years of relatnship
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by lawrenzooo: 6:50pm On May 09, 2016
Ozoneman:


After 7years of relatnship

Hmmm! well wish u all the best I do hope you two can come out of this better and stronger.
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by tosyne2much(m): 6:55pm On May 09, 2016
gamaliel121:





Bro free that bitchhhh.....ppl dat cheat never change!!!
Bros u wicked oooo cheesy
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by gamaliel121(m): 7:30pm On May 09, 2016
tosyne2much:
Bros u wicked oooo cheesy


Tosyne2much. U too much.....
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by ivyy(f): 8:11pm On May 09, 2016
Why not just forgive her? She could have kept it to herself but she didn't.
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by tosyne2much(m): 8:49pm On May 09, 2016
gamaliel121:



Tosyne.2much. U too much.....
Why u talk say I too much baba ? cheesy
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Nickymezor(f): 9:47pm On May 09, 2016
OP, do forgive her okay so dat u can hv peace.Pray over it as well
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by gamaliel121(m): 9:49pm On May 09, 2016
tosyne2much:
Why u talk say I too much baba ? cheesy


I dey feel your threads scarra...e dey always make sense....no be childs...
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by tosyne2much(m): 9:59pm On May 09, 2016
gamaliel121:



I dey feel your threads scarra...e dey always make sense....no be childs...
Eeeyah thanks baba... But I don retire for now sha cheesy
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by tosyne2much(m): 10:01pm On May 09, 2016
Nickymezor:
OP, do forgive her okay so dat u can hv peace.Pray over it as well
Hmmmmm !!!
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by schumastic(m): 10:35pm On May 09, 2016
Ozoneman:
I never really wanted to be in the shoe i am presently but am not feeling alright at all, every palliative measures taken so far have not really given me any sort of relief.

I met my ex 2009 in my 3rd year through her sister, who happens to be a close friend, and love took us off almost instantly to a journey i never expected could come to a sad and painful end. she has been there through the tough times back in school days.

And talking of the tough times, my parents relocated to the east during the period i gained admission in school; those period were the darkest of my life. i only but managed to pay my school fees through my mum savings (the best mum in world) and from thence till i graduated it was a battle feeding, rent paying and all. i had to write exams for fellow students to survive. So she came in when i needed a support and she did supported and i never stopped appreciating her role in my life.

we have been having issues of male-friends and the too-close-for-comfort kinda relationship they shared but she assured it was nothing and after much quarreling and fighting i decided to let go of the issue.

its been seven years now, am now working in a federal government establishment and doing really fine. there were no doubt she was the one i wanted to marry. some weeks ago i planned calling her to tell her it would be next year but i couldn't cos of the confession she made about her fling while in school and before she started her service last year. she had been seeing this guy, a fellow departmental mate, for the past 3years. she said she went for a church program and the message got to her and one of the things she was told was to come to me and confess what she had done.

i have ended the relationship but i find it hard to move on. she has been apologizing and pleading ever since then. i feel she is sincere and truly remorseful but i don't know what to do. Am really flattened out right now. i feel so empty and don't know if i will ever get over this. i have done everything to try move on but to no avail.

please help me someone, anyone. I need a word of strength to my fainting heart. I need help.

DO NOT MARRY OUT OF PITY...if you can forgive and forget then you can go ahead with the wedding plans but if you can forgive and you will find it difficult to forget then just move on..is her loss not yours, just picture it that karma is at it again..

2 Likes

Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Nickymezor(f): 11:45pm On May 10, 2016
tosyne2much:
Hmmmmm !!!
Oga Tosin, kilode
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by tosyne2much(m): 12:26am On May 11, 2016
Nickymezor:
Oga Tosin, kilode
Kilon shele now? cheesy
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by Ozoneman: 12:34pm On May 11, 2016
schumastic:


DO NOT MARRY OUT OF PITY...if you can forgive and forget then you can go ahead with the wedding plans but if you can forgive and you will find it difficult to forget then just move on..is her loss not yours, just picture it that karma is at it again..


thank you very much, i appreciate each and every comments here. well, my train of thought is yet to come to a conclusive stop about what really to do. For now am focused on my upcoming professional exams.
Re: How Do I Carry On After 7years Without Her by xtervaganza(m): 1:19pm On May 11, 2016
If I were you I would forgive her




Buh on one condition ooo.




The day and time she chests on you(after marriage) her obituary will be in the news

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