edwife:


Nah you are not pushing any buttons, a long while coming? wow I am impressed.

Good.

I'd like to keep you impressed.

EfemenaXY:
Edwife, you're going round in circles. Let's agree to disagree on this.

As far as I'm concerned, woman who is 100% reliant on a man for EVERYTHING, despite her educational qualifications is no different to a begger.

What's the point of going to school in the first place if her sole aim is to be a "kept" woman? We've all got brains. Use it or lose it. It's that simple.

Yes, let's agree to disagree because you were the one throwing things i never said, picking posts and things i said from a totally different discussions to conclude my stance on housewife and i wasn't going in circles.

As far as I am concerned, a woman who is 100% reliant on a man doesn't have to beg, no woman in a happy marriage can be a beggar to her husband. Many people have their own definition of marriage and marriage to me is, togetherness,a team,a support system,an union where nobody has to come short.

I went to school to acquire knowledge in order to deal with different challenging life throws at me. It helps me build opinions and have points of view on things in life.

Just for the record, I never advocate for any woman to be kept at home without her consent, it has to be A JOINT decision and as soon as the kids are of school age, please go back on the streets and participate in the growth of the economy,your household and your future.

How can a woman be 100% dependent on her husband?? I'm sorry, but she's a LIABILITY!
Even if she's a sahm, she can still find one or two things to do and earn some money , no matter how little.
So, she wan buy pad..she will have to wait on her husband.
If her mum needs some money, she will tell her to wait till her husband comes?! Chai!

But I'm not surprised, you once said a man can fully cater for his wife, kids and her relatives.
I just wonder what exactly is her own role in her parent's home...a bridge to bring a savior across?
Even in this present economic, any woman who relies 100% on her husband is digging her grave.
Cc edwife.

byvan03:




Edwife is right oo, I didn't beg, not when am the accountant general. I think she is married to a stingy man and failed to use her brain. I also don't believe she knows anything about the course she studied, maybe she didn't even graduate. Some beg cap in hand but many run that department so no need to beg.


Some women never worked in their life but do much to show for not working, why many work but could barely buy a decent pair of shoes. It truly depends on the dynamics of the marriage. This woman is married to a mad man, she should know better.

Always truthful and objective.

edwife:


Thank you for getting what i was saying from my previous post.Anybody that wants to stay at home need to be taken care of and such woman will never have to beg for anything.



If anything would have gone wrong, i would have been in Nigeria because it was in Nigeria that i was a housewife and yes I would have had all the support i could because I had things in place for me and the kids. Do you know that there are some women who work but as soon as they lose their spouse, they can't cope with the expenses? Their salaries can't support them. It is all about good planning and the man you are married to and I agree with you, people should stop making babies they can't support.



Exactly what I said in my previous posts, in Nigeria- you will hardly find a man who makes the minimum wage asking his wife to stay home. Who are the women hawking pure water,bananas on the streets? Even sending their kids to hustle not to talk of their wives? There are many jumoke in Nigeria.

I think that we are ALL on the same page at the end of the day.

Mindfulness:


I think that we are ALL on the same page at the end of the day.

We all are...

TheArchangel:
The thesis writers are here.

How do you people manage to write all this long epistles?

Damn.

i tire o my sister...

EfemenaXY:



1000+ Likes!

You couldn't have said it any better.

a person is entitled to only one like... all these your 1000+ likes will attract a fine of N145 henceforth...

signed:
فبفببابفق اععنا.

quivah:
How can a woman be 100% dependent on her husband?? I'm sorry, but she's a LIABILITY!
Even if she's a sahm, she can still find one or two things to do and earn some money , no matter how little.
So, she wan buy pad..she will have to wait on her husband.
If her mum needs some money, she will tell her to wait till her husband comes?! Chai!

But I'm not surprised, you once said a man can fully cater for his wife, kids and her relatives.
I just wonder what exactly is her own role in her parent's home...a bridge to bring a savior across?
Even in this present economic, any woman who relies 100% on her husband is digging her grave.
Cc edwife.

I'm sorry, I shouldn't find any of these funny but it got me in stitches...

Okay. Back to viewing mode

Lol...this unattractive muscular-looking woman again

If your basis of comparison between a housewife and a working class wife is money, then you may be getting it all wrong because some housewives are way richer than some 'working class wives'... Some housewives' allowances are multiple(s) of what some working class women earn esp. in Nigeria where people earn as low as 30k or even less .. and yes they(housewives) have fatter account balances. .. Some housewives even have insurances to cover them in times of emergency. .. All housewives ain't broke..

For me, one needs to work to add value to oneself ... idleness no be am at all.... We just need to diversify/explore to make life more meaningful. ...
I can't totally exclude money, however assuming all working class women have more money than housewives is totally wrong....

Cc: EfemenaXY

Your post is damn too long for me to quote, but in Yoruba land these women are called "Alabodo".. How many of these rich husbands do we have around, that can conveniently give 100% financial support to his wife and family without grunting?
Even at that, as you are bend on bring working women who Dont have as much as some sahm in, Dont forget to also chip in these sahm who are very much lacking. It goes both ways.

Some women manage the finances in their matrimonial home while some so called working woman are controlled by their husbands and by the end of the day have nothing to show for it except the almighty pad

Also, Dont be bias, some sahm with large 'fat account' are controlled by their husbands too..they are even at the worse receiving end, if the 'nice' husband changes along the line. Yes! People change. The type of men are more controlling! And most of these women (who for financial gains) won't love to leave easily.
At least, they bought the pad with their own money and didn't have to wait on husband to buy for them.
And most working class lady do have things to show for it, their satisfaction, not of them earn 30k/month,,so what are you saying again?! I suppose you now work, what do you show for it? Or your account is largely filled with saved husby's money?
Also, most sahms with supposedly large account (leeches!, most of them) are lazy, owambe oriented women who are quite silly enough not to have a savings...most of them roll with their types, liabilities,have little time to discuss about seemingly important things other than the latest party,clothes,Dubai.. They have all the time in the world.
(Since you are trying to show the downsides of working class women,maybe you won't find it annoying if I do the same)
I still cant imagine why another woman's child will take full charge of my family's finances.. Its sound very silly, selfish and awfully disgusting..
Am I now some sort of trade by batter.?
Even if I earn less than these sahm, I still get to chip in my quota and of course, with my sufficient husband's quota. Cause you made it sound like only sahms have rich well to do husbands.

And why must she have a role in her parent's home? Is she living for her or her parents? Not every parents depend on their kids

And yes! A daughter has a role in her parent's lives..I'm utterly disgusted at this your point.. I mean,if we are not on the same page ..still be considerate please.. Imagine!
So, because you are trying to drive your point on wives feeding solely from their husband's pocket, you had to display such lack of emotion!

How many people working can even afford caring for their mothers and siblings

There are some sahm with large account who Dont care for their families, either on the husband's decision, lock up or on her own.

Anyways, I still agree that being a sahm (freely) is very good.. But being 100% dependent, even adding your family wahala join is overwhelming. A sahm can still work from home..
Like you said, "Know where you belong and who you marry.SIMPLE"
So EOD ma!

EfemenaXY:




I'm sorry, I shouldn't find any of these funny but it got me in stitches...

Okay. Back to viewing mode

Lol it was just a joke.. But she seems to take the 'pad' part so serious.

I hate stupid men more than the devil. She should div force that animal. But first get him to the police station.

@ edwife, sorry to single you out but I sensed your frustration when you said you were tired of "repeating the same thing." Please, be not be weary in well doing, somebody out there will be uplifted by your stance and encouragement.

The SHM topic was very popular here circa 2013. Many find it very intriguing because it delves into sensitive facets like money and trust. The key is to understand where the apathy is coming from, what experiences, what realities are being reflected in the statements of those who make derogatory comments about it. In the end we are products and sometimes victims of our upbringing, our experiences, and the experiences of others. When you do a thorough analysis, you realize there is no need to get into an argument about it.

Start with women who have actually experienced being SHMs and what their experiences have been like.

Was it good or was it bad? If you've done it and it was bad, makes sense your perception would be negative

What is the economics of their family background? Parents and/or neighbors who (currently or in the past) fought over a lack of financial resources? Abusive husband and Dad with Mom being the only one who took care of them (thank God she wasn't a SHM)

Were the daughters of the family raised to consider themselves as good as the sons or were they treated as inferior? This can translate into the future matrimonial relationship and a fight for relevance thst is largely based on economic status

What is the psychological makeup? What is her perception of her value if she is not earning? A feeling of being useless to self and society?

Was the role thrust upon them by circumstances? Unable to find employment? Getting pregnant and rushing into marriage with no job?

Was it a joint decision with both parties agreeing it's right for their family or one person compelling the other to accept?

Do they have joint accounts? Is it her money, his money or our money?

What is the level of unity of purpose in the union? Does each do his/her own thing or do they work together for the common good?

What kind of girlfriend were they before the marriage? Were they chosen as the lesser of 5 evil other girls? were they chosen because they were first to get pregnant out of a harem of multiple chics? Were they their husband's first choice or just manageable seconds?

Are they supporting relatives that depend on them for survival? If they are not working, what would be the lot of those relatives?

How does the husband perceive the wife's extended family? Beggars? Traders who sold their daughter to him and want to continue "milking him" if she's not working?

Can their husbands trust them with money? Or is he constantly wondering if he should hire an Accountant to do an audit

Are they married to controlling men? Someone who says you must never spend more than $Bleep /xxon a pair of shoes or on your hair "because I say so?"

Are they married to cheating husbands with multiple side chics he's financing with his income?

Are they philandering wives themselves? Could their husbands trust them to keep out of mischief if they stayed home?

What is the real, nakeddddd, relationship they have with their spouse? What is the level of trust? Is the other party even trustworthy at all? How secure are they in the stability of their relationship? Threat of things falling apart constantly hovering?

What is the reason why they are staying home? Just so they can act like billionaire wives? Because their passion is in volunteering in a different field from their qualifications? Young kids? High profile social standing resulting in engagements that cannot be managed with a 9-5 job?

Why did they marry the partner? Due to a gold digging mindset, desperation because of the onset of age, or genuiune love for the other person?

Many more but I will stop there. Suffice to say one factor by itself would not be enough to make conclusions. When they start to add up though, a picture starts to develop.

Many women marry their abusers and stay tightly married even as they earn income and even with the threat of death hanging over them. That kind of resilience is a sickness that devastates all over the world, whether it is in Naija where they behave like there is no relative that will take them in or whether it is Oyinbo land where shelters exist to keep them safe but they leave and move back in with their abusers.


A few years ago, a female lawyer poster, (briefer?) had a lot of posts rabidly against SHM. Imagine my shock the day she openly said she discussed her staying home with her husband and he said no. I challenged her on it, the post is somewhere in my history. So, the same person who did not see any good reason why a wife should stay home had discussed becoming one with her husband

Another time, an older woman here (something baby) with the same propaganda against SHM was saying how no one should do joint account with their spouse. I told her my husband and I run our accounts jointly and her response implied I did not really like the idea, I was just doing it I did what I do best, I ignored, it was obvious the notion is over her head.

Some time after that post, I stumbled on a thread where she talked about being a SHM earlier in her marriage and one day, she asked her husband to buy her sanitary towels on his way back home. He said some very unkind words to her that left her feeling like nothing. So, what do you expect from the lips of a woman that suffered such humiliation at the hands of the one that should cherish her?

The same poster said she does not know the value of her husband's life insurance policy because he keeps it a secret and also implied the family home is only in the husband's name and he alone pays the mortgage even though she works now. You start to get an idea of the marriage arrangement and you begin to get an idea of the place the person is speaking from.

So, anyone with a good man, coming on here to feed on other people's realities is not doing herself a favor.

I was a SHM after we had our youngest because it worked for our family in so many ways and once upon a time, it was affordable. The first question before any of the ones I listed above is if it is an affordable choice? The vast majority of women who shame other women will answer "no." So, if it is not even an option, I'm always befuddled at how much energy goes into disparaging it. That is like me going back and forth with an argument over the effect of Hermes Birkin bags on the crocodile population. Since I cannot afford a Birkin, even if I loved crocodiles, I would not spare a lot of time on such an argument.

I don't agree that SHM are more likely to suffer domestic violence. Women need to do a better job of picking their husbands. If you choose to marry an abusive man, that's your decision and your responsibility. A man that loves you will not start to abuse you because you stay home. Remember that the decision was joint.

The only value some women bring to their marriage is the income they earn. There are many men who will endure anything as long as the wife has an income to keep up with the Joneses. Ask those women who get passed around the office (sexual harrassment and very common in Lagos) and their husbands pretend it's not happening because the money means too much. Ask those women who philander (voluntary) because there is no emotional connection to their spouse but the spouse grins and bears it because the income is needed. How about men that just endure their wives because of her income that keeps them looking like big boys? For some women, the only reason their husband hasn't left is because of the income they bring in and they typically earn more than their spouse.

My prayer is for peace and joy in everyone's heart and good judgement to be the right kind of spouse and marry the right kind of man for you. It all starts with your choice, very few people will change completely (for good or bad) after marriage. Don't get desperate, work on your self esteem, pull your shoulders back, hold your head high and walk like a queen, being unmarried is not the worst thing in the world.

MMotimo:
@ edwife, sorry to single you out but I sensed your frustration when you said you were tired of "repeating the same thing." Please, be not be weary in well doing, somebody out there will be uplifted by your stance and encouragement.

The SHM topic was very popular here circa 2013. Many find it very intriguing because it delves into sensitive facets like money and trust. The key is to understand where the apathy is coming from, what experiences, what realities are being reflected in the statements of those who make derogatory comments about it. In the end we are products and sometimes victims of our upbringing, our experiences, and the experiences of others. When you do a thorough analysis, you realize there is no need to get into an argument about it.

Start with women who have actually experienced being SHMs and what their experiences have been like.

Was it good or was it bad? If you've done it and it was bad, makes sense your perception would be negative

What is the economics of their family background? Parents and/or neighbors who (currently or in the past) fought over a lack of financial resources? Abusive husband and Dad with Mom being the only one who took care of them (thank God she wasn't a SHM)

Were the daughters of the family raised to consider themselves as good as the sons or were they treated as inferior? This can translate into the future matrimonial relationship and a fight for relevance thst is largely based on economic status

What is the psychological makeup? What is her perception of her value if she is not earning? A feeling of being useless to self and society?

Was the role thrust upon them by circumstances? Unable to find employment? Getting pregnant and rushing into marriage with no job?

Was it a joint decision with both parties agreeing it's right for their family or one person compelling the other to accept?

Do they have joint accounts? Is it her money, his money or our money?

What is the level of unity of purpose in the union? Does each do his/her own thing or do they work together for the common good?

What kind of girlfriend were they before the marriage? Were they chosen as the lesser of 5 evil other girls? were they chosen because they were first to get pregnant out of a harem of multiple chics? Were they their husband's first choice or just manageable seconds?

Are they supporting relatives that depend on them for survival? If they are not working, what would be the lot of those relatives?

How does the husband perceive the wife's extended family? Beggars? Traders who sold their daughter to him and want to continue "milking him" if she's not working?

Can their husbands trust them with money? Or is he constantly wondering if he should hire an Accountant to do an audit

Are they married to controlling men? Someone who says you must never spend more than $Bleep /xxon a pair of shoes or on your hair "because I say so?"

Are they married to cheating husbands with multiple side chics he's financing with his income?

Are they philandering wives themselves? Could their husbands trust them to keep out of mischief if they stayed home?

What is the real, naked, relationship they have with their spouse? What is the level of trust? Is the other party even trustworthy at all? How secure are they in the stability of their relationship? Threat of things falling apart constantly hovering?

What is the reason why they are staying home? Just so they can act like billionaire wives? Because their passion is in volunteering in a different field from their qualifications? Young kids? High profile social standing resulting in engagements that cannot be managed with a 9-5 job?

Why did they marry the partner? Due to a gold digging mindset, desperation because of the onset of age, or genuiune love for the other person?

Many more but I will stop there. Suffice to say one factor by itself would not be enough to make conclusions. When they start to add up though, a picture starts to develop.

Many women marry their abusers and stay tightly married even as they earn income and even with the threat of death hanging over them. That kind of resilience is a sickness that devastates all over the world, whether it is in Naija where they behave like there is no relative that will take them in or whether it is Oyinbo land where shelters exist to keep them safe but they leave and move back in with their abusers.


A few years ago, a female lawyer poster, (briefer?) had a lot of posts rabidly against SHM. Imagine my shock the day she openly said she discussed her staying home with her husband and he said no. I challenged her on it, the post is somewhere in my history. So, the same person who did not see any good reason why a wife should stay home had discussed becoming one with her husband

Another time, an older woman here (something baby) with the same propaganda against SHM was saying how no one should do joint account with their spouse. I told her my husband and I run our accounts jointly and her response implied I did not really like the idea, I was just doing it I did what I do best, I ignored, it was obvious the notion is over her head.

Some time after that post, I stumbled on a thread where she talked about being a SHM earlier in her marriage and one day, she asked her husband to buy her sanitary towels on his way back home. He said some very unkind words to her that left her feeling like nothing. So, what do you expect from the lips of a woman that suffered such humiliation at the hands of the one that should cherish her?

The same poster said she does not know the value of her husband's life insurance policy because he keeps it a secret and also implied the family home is only in the husband's name and he alone pays the mortgage even though she works now. You start to get an idea of the marriage arrangement and you begin to get an idea of the place the person is speaking from.

So, anyone with a good man, coming on here to feed on other people's realities is not doing herself a favor.

I was a SHM after we had our youngest because it worked for our family in so many ways and once upon a time, it was affordable. The first question before any of the ones I listed above is if it is an affordable choice? The vast majority of women who shame other women will answer "no." So, if it is not even an option, I'm always befuddled at how much energy goes into disparaging it.

I don't agree that SHM are more likely to suffer domestic violence. Women need to do a better job of picking their husbands. If you choose to marry an abusive man, that's your decision and your responsibility. A man that loves you will not start to abuse you because you stay home. Remember that the decision was joint.

The only value some women bring to their marriage is the income they earn. There are many men who will endure anything as long as the wife has an income to keep up with the Joneses. Ask those women who get passed around the office (sexual harrassment and very common in Lagos) and their husbands pretend it's not happening because the money means too much. Ask those women who philander (voluntary) because there is no emotional connection to their spouse but the spouse grins and bears it because the income is needed. How about men that just endure their wives because of her income that keeps them looking like big boys?

My prayer is for peace and joy in everyone's heart and good judgement to be the right kind of spouse and marry the right kind of man for you. It all starts with your choice, very few people will change completely (for good or bad) after marriage. Don't get desperate, work on your self esteem, pull your shoulders back, hold your head high and walk like a queen, being unmarried is not the worst thing in the world.

Thank you dear, this is a very insightful and intelligent post. It 's easy to see that you are experience and very objective.
I won't stop, I will continue to talk about the positivity of marriages,happy homes,happy families-i come from one and it's the only language I know.

Motimo very insightful submission

The bottom line is to be right and marry right
Then most of the problems that people encounter wont even be there in the first instance
Look at your own watch and go by it and not by anyone else's.

These are my own personal belief's;
Having a job does not stop abuse
It only makes it easier to have an escape route if it does happen.
However if you married right in the first instance, then the likelihood of being abused and disrespected is rather low.
There are good men and good women out there.

I also believe that people don't really shift much left or right and a man who will respect you will respect and cherish you regardless of if you are a stay at home mum or stay at work mum and vice versa.

What we should be doing is putting more emphasis on teaching people to be right and marry right, then many of these problems wont even be there in the first instance.
At the end of the day, you can only give what you have.
As parents we also need to invest values and esteem into our children so that when the time comes for them to choose, they are choosing right and being right.

But everyone has left the original issue

MMotimo, thank you for what you wrote (I'm kinda worried that they may come for your head for saying so). If you want to work, please do. If you want to stay home, please do. The choice of your spouse matters more than that decision when it comes to spousal abuse. Ronke Shonde had a job and died. Other women had no jobs and died. So clearly being a SaHM doesn't equate to disrespect and abuse.

OP, I really feel the wife should bring her family into this issue. Because even her MiL is supporting bringing the girl back and thats worrying. And if she cannot stay where she is, does she have some money to rent a one-bedroom apartment? It doesn't have to be in Lagos, if she has relatives she trusts outside let her to around there and rent one (it's much cheaper). But returning to that house and bringing that maid back is a recipe for disaster. Her husband has an agenda.

Husband beating wife cuz of house help na wa o husband wants to impregnate the house help by force. Kai konji strong ooo if and if konji never existed in the life of a man, how sweet it would have been

The bottom line is every parent should try as much as possible to help build their child's self esteem. Who knows, it might reduce the number of battered partners here and there. Anyone can be subjected to domestic abuse, stay at home or not. Titilayo used to work in a Bank, the other Ibadan lady had a job, no? I don't know about others but I can speak for me and me only.

Growing up as a young sisieko I met the good, the bad and the ugly. You just know those useless ones after spending a few hours with them. You know these ones are no good, grab your bathroom slippers and run. My closest friend( a physiotherapist) in my younger years just left her home not because she wanted to, but because her husband threw her out. She has endured all kinds of abuse. I remember when she was courting her husband, the things he would say to her, the words he used on her rude demeaning words/things. I would say to her, are you mad? why not run before it's too late but she married him hence my stance on self esteem issues.

In a country like Nigeria women and men should be smart when choosing partners and making babies. It's just not fair on these children to see us spread our 'dorty' laundry outside. The 13 year old child of this woman in the OP was a witness to Dad stripping mum unclad and beating her and the eediot of a man is demanding an apology . Just keep that help away from this deranged man

You know, I have never believed that people can change all of a sudden. I feel like the signs are there but some people either choose to turn a blind eye, or decide to stay and manage "after all husbands are scarce".

Here we are talking about women. Do we even know how many men out there are being abused by their partners but can't say anything about it? that one is a story for super story and a topic for another thread.

Like Ifyalways...sent from my iced fish stall

*High five*

Cutehector:




I think she should just bring bak d househelp and plant magun insyd her.


So that we shall see who is the rat.

Neverquit:
*High five*

gives her high five. dnt mind all these oda people dat will b writing crap dat putting magun insyd her is wrong.


So when d man was busy _raping her, it was right na. Yeye people.


Thank God u reason with me

Ha ha

Imagine, none of 'them' raised up the major ish about reporting the hubby to the cops for further investigation (or arrest).

Wiffie can get customized magun that will be activitated when the guy is about to do it ...I need to stop... today na Sunday.

Cutehector:
gives her high five. dnt mind all these oda people dat will b writing crap dat putting magun insyd her is wrong.


So when d man was busy _raping her, it was right na. Yeye people.


Thank God u reason with me

Neverquit:
Ha ha

Imagine, none of 'them' raised up the major ish about reporting the hubby to the cops for further investigation (or arrest).

Wiffie can get customized magun that will be activitated when the guy is about to do it ...I need to stop... today na Sunday.

lmao... I liked dat ur thread abt horrible things ladies hav done to guys. it's really a pity. Lol. Loving a girl wholeheartedly and she doesn't see it

I have been rather fortunate to hear the male's perspective. Both genders have horror stories...quite sad.

Cutehector:
lmao... I liked dat ur thread abt horrible things ladies hav done to guys. it's really a pity. Lol. Loving a girl wholeheartedly and she doesn't see it

quivah:
This Cutehector is just too dumb for my liking, and even worse he tries to act smart and that makes him more dumb!

100 likes for you lady,was going through the threads and seeing various contributions until I saw his exchange with cococandy

How can one man be this dumb

HornyTiwa:

100 likes for you lady,was going through the threads and seeing various contributions until I saw his exchange with cococandy

How can one man be this dumb

Lol you can imagine.
He might not have gotten this worse if he can just admit hes a miserable dumba.s.s
You will be surprised, a lady also shares his view..

SAMBARRY:
Now I believe when one of the nl member said many Nigerian women are masochist.a man abused you,lied against you,cheated on you disgraced you and stripped you naked yet you want to go back to him

Is that a marriage

Anyway some people enjoy misery

She maybe staying because of her children.....no one enjoys being miserable

Bomz:

She maybe staying because of her children.....no one enjoys being miserable

false!

If NO one enjoys misery why do we read of women dying as Mrs when they had several opportunities to come out alive. They actually ENJOYED the violence

Moreover will the said children be with her forever? Abi are the children blind and deaf? Them no dey see and hear the disgrace daddy gives mummy

SAMBARRY:
false!

If NO one enjoys misery why do we read of women dying as Mrs when they had several opportunities to come out alive. They actually ENJOYED the violence

Moreover will the said children be with her forever? Abi are the children blind and deaf? Them no dey see and hear the disgrace daddy gives mummy

Fine dey see and hear d disgrace.....but there is something called emotional trauma.....fine when dey come of age den there is no excuse

Bomz:

Fine dey see and hear d disgrace.....but there is something called emotional trauma.....fine when dey come of age den there is no excuse

so you mean you'll wait for 20something years before you leave?

For 20something years you'll endure shame violence and reproach?


How are you sure you won't have died before then?

When you can still walk out with the children when you're still alive

I'm sure that was the same thing titi said When she was alive

Not knowing that sitting there will help your sons learn boxing so that When they grow up they will continue from where daddy stopped and the girls will think all men are violent because that is what she's used to seeing and she'll go into marriage expecting her husband to be violent