You are useless and worthless.....end of story

I won't tell you to move on on your own. You obviously can't. You need professional help. You are damaged!!!

Are you okay?

Chrisjane:
Ask him for forgiveness for being harsh and then move on with your life. lgnore him completely in future and be polite when you meet in the same social gathering. Is hard but Time will tell...

daretodiffer:
Are you okay?

As in?

As in do you suffer from any mental disorder, disease or impairment ?

Chrisjane:

As in?

Mindfulness:


At the stage she is at in ths moment in time, she will end up repeating her mistakes.
She better starts working on her self-esteem and learns to respect herself before engaging in any relationship, be it with him or someone else.

This is story is so sick.



What can I say?

Well nothing, I guess biological make-up is something that can't be helped.

Ishilove:

This ya story get k-leg.

You aren't dating, but he packed his bags and moved in with you. In other words you're room/flatmates.

The two of you fought each other, he tore your panties and even 'forced' you to jerk him off, yet you say you two aren't dating.

Op, either you're friends with benefits, shagging each other without commitment, or this story is as fake as Kim Kardashians oversized buttocks.

As in eh, at least I'm not the only one with reservations on this story.

I just didn't want to dwell on dissecting it totally, to avoid a situation where readers would assume I was making excuses for the guy & diverting attention from the fact that she was sexually assaulted.

daretodiffer:
You are useless and worthless.....end of story

I won't tell you to move on on your own. You obviously can't. You need professional help. You are damaged!!!

Typical example of kettle calling pot black.

daretodiffer:
As in do you suffer from any mental disorder, disease or impairment ?

No. But methinks you do judging from your previous rants for attention! l know 'worthless and useless" Which is synonymous to daretodiffer will quote me after this to prove me right and tell us who she really is. Sanctimonious fool who thinks she knows it all!

Firstfirst, why would a boy and a girl cohabit in da name of being 'FRIENDS'? Friends indeed, nonsense! And the advisers at the beginning of this thread were advocating begging for forgiveness, say who die?
Come macarena, do your parents know you're living with a young man with hot blood running in his veins? For your info, he doesn't like nor love you; you are just a tool, shikena!
Get up, dust your buttocks, pick your long-forgotten bible and ask God for mercy and grace to focus in your academics!
Finally, throw the dude out of your apartment and life!

I would rather be an attention seeker than a worthless and useless thing .....


But then I am no attention seeker and you are


You really help because it seems like your self esteem is minus 100. No self-respecting human with even a digit IQ would ask another human to beg an abusive friend cum rapist. Youe existence is an apo......

Chrisjane:

No. But methinks you do judging from your previous rants for attention!

5minsmadness:


Hehehe.
I was about to respond pugnaciously then i saw the moniker.
No, i did not say men have no self control.
In fact, quite the opposite.
MEN ARE ALL ABOUT SELF CONTROL.
The base instinct of any man is sex. A man is called a gentleman by a woman because he doesnt ask for sex. A man is mature because he can control himself in sexual situations.
A man sees a woman he likes and no matter how intelligent she is upstairs... Its sex he is thinking about. He may mask it and play the nice guy, romantic guy, supportive guy, save a hoe (pls pardon my french) guy, the bottom line is, he's either giving himself reasons to have sex or not to have sex with the woman.

Its actually in response to Bukatyne's previous thread on what a man wants. I've been out of circulation for a while so it was the first thing that came to mind.


In fact the only reason you think they are not depraved animals is because they havent all asked you for sex

You can actually only speak for yourself, not all men.

The basic instinct for any human being male or female, or even any living being is self-preservation

Sex is overrated.

Ioannes:


You can actually only speak for yourself, not all men.

The base instinct for any human bring male or female, or even any living being is self-survival.

Sex is overrated.

Coming from a guy, this sounds more like a defeatist statement garnered through many years of disappointing encounters

crackhaus:

As in eh, at least I'm not the only one with reservations on this story.

I just didn't want to dwell on dissecting it totally, to avoid a situation where readers would assume I was making excuses for the guy & diverting attention from the fact that she was sexually assaulted.

I was actually the first person to like ishilove's post.
I had my reservations as well but the whole sexual assault thing draws out sympathy and one doesnt want to appear insensitive.

Then there's the sudden new post about fingering and rubbing her face with sperm.... sudden self realization in her own strengths and moving on...

I'm not saying its not true o, but something is definitely fishy.

Nyway. The thread is filled with righteous rampage. All is well with the world.

crackhaus:

Well nothing, I guess biological make-up is something that can't be helped.

How does OP's story represent biological make-up?

And if so, can we also conclude that all men are ra.pists?

Ioannes:


You can actually only speak for yourself, not all men.

The base instinct for any human bring male or female, or even any living being is self-survival.

Sex is overrated.

I share your views but didn't want to speak out for being accused of not knowing how men tick. It's actually funny that some people assume that all me are busy fighting their li.ido on a daily basis like some super Hot, se.x starved creatures.

5minsmadness:


Coming from a guy, this sounds more like a defeatist statement garnered through many years of disappointing encounters

Lol, you can't be more mistaken. It isn't a defeatist statement. I'd like to think it's a statement of someone who has seen it all.

There's definitely more to life than sex.

When you get there you'll understand.

Mindfulness:


I share your views but didn't want to speak out for being accused of not knowing how men tick. It's actually funny that some people assume that all me are busy fighting their li.ido on a daily basis like some super Hot, se.x starved creatures.

God bless you there.

Ioannes:


Lol, you can't be more mistaken. It isn't a defeatist statement. I'd like to think it's a statement of someone who has seen it all.

There's definitely more to life than sex.

When you get there you'll understand.

Oh, i know there's definitely more to life than sex.
But saying sex is not at the very least an important part of men's lives is just self deciet.

Have u gone outside today?

Are you saying since today began you havent met or seen at least one lady that you had sexual thoughts about, even if you immediately pushed it out of your mind?

Go on. Disappoint me by telling the truth

Ioannes:


Lol, you can't be more mistaken. It isn't a defeatist statement. I'd like to think it's a statement of someone who has seen it all.

There's definitely more to life than sex.

When you get there you'll understand.

P. S @bolded, by saying this you admit there ws a time where u thought everything was about sex

macarena:
Thank you every one for the advice. I got more than I expected.
And most of you were right, my self-esteem is nothing to brag about.

TV01, are you a psychologist?
All your descriptions were so apt.
I never knew it was this bad. When you said I was on my way to becoming damaged, I started crying because its so true.
I've always looked at relationships through Mills and Boon coloured glasses. Passionate fights brought you closer than ever.
Naive me!

I will learn to love and forgive myself though I don't know where to start from. And even though I find it hard, I'll go make friends.
I'll take it one day at a time.

You are most welcome. And apologies for being somewhat blunt. The trauma wearies one atimes.

You said you were in church? Nowadays that can mean many things, including the opposite of what it implies. However, if you truly believe, I would advise you head for Christ and the cross in the heart of things. I don't mean increased religious activity.

Give your self to prayer and to scripture. Understand who you are in Christ, and what he has done for you. Keep your self, and ensure your conduct aligns with scripture.

If there is an older, mature, female christian you can fellowship with for pointers, please find one. But be very discerning in who you choose and what you share. the closer to home she is the better.

Grace and mercy will bring about your healing - it's all grace and mercy really, God is good - and in time, you will be over this. The vision you had of "how it would be" will surely come to pass. When you meet the one, share all with him, not necessarily a detailed, but like at first here. Then honestly answer any questions.

He will be one with the shoulders and heart to love you despite, and even more so, because of what you went through. That will be the final step - perhaps almost imperceptible - in your restoration.

Ditch worldly therapeutic notions like self-esteem. Christs develop real spirituality and character, that is robust and speak to anything you will face.

Take any practical measures to avoid the person in question. If you have to see him, just be polite and aloof. If the conversation is forced, let him know you want nothing to do with him and ask that he respect that. Get an older person involved if you feel legitimately threatened.

I will remember you, may The Good Lord lift up His countenance upon you and give you His peace.


TV

^{...not sure what psycho I am, but it's not "ologist" . It is well and will be better. God bless}

5minsmadness:

Oh, i know there's definitely more to life than sex.
But saying sex is not at the very least an important part of men's lives is just self deciet.

Have u gone outside today?

Are you saying since today began you havent met or seen at least one lady that you had sexual thoughts about, even if you immediately pushed it out of your mind?

Go on. Disappoint me by telling the truth

Lol. I think we're talking about different things entirely.

Sex is an integral part of the human makeup no doubt, and yes the male tends to think more about sex than the female, which has been scientifically proven anyway.

Is it every time you think about sex that you actually have sex? If this is so then you might need some help.

All I'm saying is, man's first instinct isn't sex, it's self preservation.

You're in your room at night with your babe, all n@ked and ready to go. Suddenly you hear the unmistakable sound of a rapid gun fire close to your window. What are you going to do?

Now let's not derail this thread OK?

5minsmadness:


P. S @bolded, by saying this you admit there ws a time where u thought everything was about sex

I plead the fourth here. Thank you.

Ioannes:


God bless you there.

And you!

5minsmadness:


I was actually the first person to like ishilove's post.
I had my reservations as well but the whole sexual assault thing draws out sympathy and one doesnt want to appear insensitive.

Then there's the sudden new post about fingering and rubbing her face with sperm.... sudden self realization in her own strengths and moving on...

I'm not saying its not true o, but something is definitely fishy.

Nyway. The thread is filled with righteous rampage. All is well with the world.

Lmao..righteous rampage indeed, that be the true true..

Crushing on him, fantasizing sex with him, getting jealous when he talks of other girls...hehe! And all the while living together.

Oh well..

Mindfulness:


How does OP's story represent biological make-up?

And if so, can we also conclude that all men are ra.pists?

Drunk in love.

Women crave security—your own words baby girl..
Problem is some of y'all stay put in such situations hoping there will be a change...probably due to fear of the unknown and starting all over again building that security from scratch, no?

ifyalways:
Is this some kind of fiction or what

You are co-habiting with a man? He had accommodation issues and nowhere else to turn to but you? On top of that he rapped you? Yet you want to apologise to him?

For what exactly?

Do you have self esteem issues, are depressed or something because I for the life of me, don't understand you.

You also love or want him hence your jealousy when you see him with other women?

So many issues with you, if you are not a nld troll.

Maame me pa wo ts) checke me thread wei.
Wo y3 big madam nti ma me contract kakra wai.

https://www.nairaland.com/2404758/customised-accessories-headquarters-come-here

Hope my 2 by 4 Twi is not too bad?

crackhaus:

Drunk in love.

It's Beyonce's best video clip ever and a great song too.

Women crave security—your own words baby girl..

Did the relationship she described feel secure to her? I don't think so.

The 'funny' thing about women is that they seem to crave security but sometimes often find themselves in insecure, fear-based relationships.

Problem is some of y'all stay put in such situations hoping there will be a change...probably due to fear of the unknown and starting all over again building that security from scratch, no?

Until they learn that they deserve better, everyone does.

TV01:

You are most welcome. And apologies for being somewhat blunt. The trauma wearies one atimes.

You said you were in church? Nowadays that can mean many things, including the opposite of what it implies. However, if you truly believe, I would advise you head for Christ and the cross in the heart of things. I don't mean increased religious activity.

Give your self to prayer and to scripture. Understand who you are in Christ, and what he has done for you. Keep your self, and ensure your conduct aligns with scripture.

If there is an older, mature, female christian you can fellowship with for pointers, please find one. But be very discerning in who you choose and what you share. the closer to home she is the better.

Grace and mercy will bring about your healing - it's all grace and mercy really, God is good - and in time, you will be over this. The vision you had of "how it would be" will surely come to pass. When you meet the one, share all with him, not necessarily a detailed, but like at first here. Then honestly answer any questions.

He will be one with the shoulders and heart to love you despite, and even more so, because of what you went through. That will be the final step - perhaps almost imperceptible - in your restoration.

Ditch worldly therapeutic notions like self-esteem. Christs develop real spirituality and character, that is robust and speak to anything you will face.

Take any practical measures to avoid the person in question. If you have to see him, just be polite and aloof. If the conversation is forced, let him know you want nothing to do with him and ask that he respect that. Get an older person involved if you feel legitimately threatened.

I will remember you, may The Good Lord lift up His countenance upon you and give you His peace.


TV

^{...not sure what psycho I am, but it's not "ologist" . It is well and will be better. God bless}

Thank you oh so much.
Pls may I send pm?
Just want to ask about something.
Kinda afraid of the jabs I might receive if I drop it here.

Mindfulness:


It's Beyonce's best video clip ever and a great song too.



Did the relationship she described feel secure to her? I don't think so.

The 'funny' thing about women is that they seem to crave security but sometimes often find themselves in insecure, fear-based relationships.



Until they learn that they deserve better, everyone does.

You're looking at it from your perspective on the outside, why don't you ask her if she felt the relationship was secure....and if it wasn't, ask her why she didn't remove herself from it but instead they kept staying together.

crackhaus:

You're looking at it from your perspective on the outside, why don't you ask her if she felt the relationship was secure....and if it wasn't, ask her why she didn't remove herself from it but instead they kept staying together.

@macarena

Did you feel secure in the relationship with that guy? Excuse my curiosity please.

Mindfulness:


@macarena

Did you used to feel secure in the relationship with that guy? Excuse my curiosity please.

Edited