This thread is part 2 of a post I did earlier (titled: All you need to know about Love). The question that I wish to address in this thread says: Is Conditional Love (a trade of value as basis for affection) appropriate?

I will simply answer yes. Conditional Love is appropriate and very normal. Now let me state this before I go deep that there are four main angles to love (unconditional, conditional, platonic and romantic Love). The angle we will show to people will depend on the structure of our relationship with them. So everybody practice conditional love depending on the structure of our relationship with others at that material time. Your parents, sibling, friends and even God almighty all practice conditional love.


Only Kids won't realize that Love is a BUSINESS like a BUSINESS of CONTRACT or a BUSINESS of PARTNERSHIP where all hands must be on deck towards achieving a common goal. You dare not come to the table CAP-IN-HAND (empty handed). If you do you must be a Gold DIGGER. The question is Do you know what you've got? Have you Harnessed what you've got? Do the other person recognize and appreciate what you've got? There have to be a meeting point for love to happen. Please my dear if you desire someone so desperately but he/she can't see any value in what you've got, please leave the person & go look for someone at your level and enjoy your life in peace.

There is high incidence heartbreaks and broken relationship today because people who are doing relationship are being CALCULATIVE instead of being STRATEGIC. When a person is calculative, the attention is usually on what the other person have. WHAT THE OTHER HAVE TAKES PRIORITY OVER WHO THE PERSON IS. But strategic people focus first & foremost on WHO THE PERSON IS. That is the first contribution from the other person that must come to the table. Calculative will dump you and desert you when things are down for you. Reason is THEY DONT BELIEVE IN YOU. THEY BELIEVE IN WHAT YOU HAVE. Strategic people BELIEVE IN YOU and will never leave you in times of need because they know you can Re-PRODUCE WHAT YOU HAD.

So it's our job to determine whether the other person we are dealing with is CALCULATIVE or STRATEGIC. It's our responsibility to protect our heart from heartbreaks. We need to scrutinize people before they come into our lives. If people break our heartheart and desert us in times of need or trouble or by lying to us, cheating on us or being abusive, it's not their fault but ours. If we exercise care we will have a wind of what they are capable of - whether they are calculating or strategising. If they are calculating they won't involve you. It's all about them. What they intend to do is inside them and them alone. But if they are strategising they will involve you and carry you along. This is one secret no one should ever lose sight of. So please don't cry fowl when people show their true colour. Can a leopard change its skin? Why didn't you do your home? Why didn't you verify the person before you allowed into your heart? Why did you believe everything you were told without checking whether it's true or false? Why didn't you find out the motives behind what the person says or do. At any time T, we will take the bulk of the blame. The Bucks stop on our table. We can't blame it on the Concept of Love (saying Love is a Scam etc) nor on the people who handed the concept of Love over to us. We can't even blame the person who jilted or dumped us cos we have the right to PROTECT OURSELVES. When I say protect yourself, I don't mean any other thing than Just be CAREFUL and PRAYERFUL. Co's when you are dealing with people it's only care and prayers that work ooo.

Peace!!!