Matt.6:14.....FORGIVE!! FORGIVE!!! not because of what they promised you but because it is the right thing to do, try and make your mom understand that,trust me you guys will feel more relieved and happy when you forgive and forget.

My brother I feel you and I understand how your mum is feeling right now. The truth and nothing but the truth is that your mum felt humiliated and she is still feeling bitter. But our ways are different from God's ways, and we need to remember that God's knowledge is higher than ours just like the heaven is higher than the earth. I have this strong believe that what happened to you and your mum happened so that a day like this will come.

My one kobo advice is for you is for you to tell your dad's people that left for you, that you have no problem with them, but that they should do all within their power to settle with your mum. That is the only way you can come into their family and that your mum means the whole world to you.

Please do not rush into forming a relationship with ur late father's family.

1. Forgiving them is the right thing to do but not at the expense of ur Mum's feelings.

2. Your mum will eventually be willing to forgive them but it may take longer than you think (scary but could take months,years or less).

3. Be willing to wait for whatever time ur mum decides to willingly forgive them however this has to be done through systematic and constant but not rushed persuasion and reasoning from ur own side.

4. Be prayerful about the whole matter. With God on ur side everything will gradually be resolved.

Wish you best of luck

Well personally I think the reason you are considering all this ish, itz cox of d fact dat u know your late dad's familyz stinkingly rich, nd ur already tempted with their offer nd wat they r bringing to the table. If they were not WELL TO DO folks I bet u wouldn't even be considering them right now.... Unless ur mom decides to forgive dem, I advise u stick wif her decision on dis one as she was d SOLE bearer of d burden. Ur late dad's folks are only coming for YOU cox of deir predicaments, NO grandchild. I guess dats Gods own way of punishing dem for d way they handled ur mom back den... M nt even sure ur angry at d way dy treated ur mum, buh ur already swayed by d riches untold, guy berra respect ur mum on her stand. Of she decides to forgive dem, den u can accrpt watever friggin offer dy r bringing....

In life we all gamble sometimes... Beg your mom use the opportunity offered but never forget where your coming from... My simple take on the matter

[b]Bros, I have gone through your write up very carefully and noted some advises here too.
Certain facts needs to be made clear here:

1. Your biological father impregnated your mum years back and both him and your mum faced the heat from both families.
But your dad stood by your mum all through. HE (your biological dad) NEVER ABANDONED YOU NOR YOUR MUM. Only death snatched him a bit too early, who knows he might have ended up being the father to the rest of your siblings today.

2. Your biological dad's brother was also solidly behind you, your mum and dad. He only lost contact with your mum over time maybe after she got married.

3. The people that offended your mum are HER FAMILY and your BIOLOGICAL DAD's FAMILY.

Therefore:

Your mum has every right to be angry with your biological dad's family, but I think she is carrying it too far.

In the first place, she shouldn't have given you another person's surname when your dad never abandoned you.
Your step dad is a great man and deserves every honour and respect from you. But you have a father and your father has a family and they also need you now. No matter the crime they have committed they remain part of you.
Your step dad is not only a rare good man, but he is also wise. That is why he has not followed your mum in her hardline attitude but only urged you to make your decision as an adult which you are right now.

NEVER EVER FORGET THAT YOUR DAD NEVER ABANDONED YOU. AND THAT YOUR DAD'S BROTHER WHO ALSO STOOD BY YOU AND YOUR MUM IS PART OF YOUR DAD'S FAMILY.

So my advise is to forgive the family and accept them wholeheartedly.

Your only job and challenge is how to convince your mum not to lay a curse on you.

So first, in your heart accept your dad's family. But make it clear that you can only move forward with them and all plans AFTER your MUM FORGIVES THEM and also accepts them.

So all hands should be on deck to beg, beg and continue begging your mum with every strategy employable. Once she is gotten over everyone shall live happily ever after lol.
Let your mum forgive so that your dad's family can start bearing kids again.

See bros - you are maybe 25 now. When you become older you will understand life and the complications of life more and you shall realize that you should not be rash in judging people, and that you should learn to forgive. And most importantly that the life of a man has a lot of complications. You will have your own kids someday. You will face more challenges than this.

YOUR DAD NEVER ABANDONED YOU. SO WHY SHOULD YOU NOT BE A SON TO HIS FAMILY? WHY WHY WHY? IS IT HIS FAULT THAT HE DIED EARLY?

See, even if your dad actually abandoned you due to teenage exuberances, today's reality might still intell that wise people advise you to forgive him and accept his family because that HIS FAMILY IS YOUR FAMILY AND BLOOD LINE whether you like it or not.

Your dad's family has been purnished enough by God for Christ's sake. Go and be the son that God has made you to be for them !!![/b]

LegendDrogba:



Thanks bro, my mom is not even listening to her dad or any of her family members, she feel my dads
people wants to reap from where they did not sow
considering how she was treated during her pregnancy and eventual child birth. Bro I don't even
have a job for now and having a job is not the
problem again.. My former employer is actually my
uncle's friend. So going back there is not an option
and moreover Dad's brother also have several
companies, so you see getting a job is not a
problem here at all.

Well... Your mum is unavoidably unrepentant over 20yrs of hrtbreak..

Morever.. She told you to go by your father's name and yet doesn't want you to go to his family?

Look man, never disobey your mother but try and talk real sense into her... She needs to know that your family is your legacy and yorubas don't joke with that...

And when u're done reconciling with your family.. I'd like you to tell ur uncle to help ur nairalander friend for a job! Hope I'm nt askin too much!

its not so easy to forgive pple that have hurt u. i undestand ur mums situation but its also time she let go of all the hurt n past, life is too short to dwell on anger. For u my dear, what do u actually want?

talk to your mum, this is an offer you cant decline, tell her you guys have to forgive and forget

All you need to do is keep talking to ur mom but don't push her,give her time
with time she will forgive,she was hurting but time they said heals all hurts

Go back to work and ask ur dad family to give you space for now.

janejive:
please continue, will like to know how it ended. u are a rare gem.

she started crying (my fathers mum) saying that she told her (my mum) that she should allow them(my dad's family) to put a mark more or like that yoruba tribal mark on my face which she refused,but thank God for her refusing. not long I discovered I had 5 step siblings 4 boy and a girl. I was told that there my fathers family used to come and look for me in my area but kept on telling people that there were looking for Sheriff my muslim name,but everyone don't know me by that coz Abimbola is my official name.bla bla bla but what I noticed was that there where giving me xcuse.but this does not mean I have to leave with them I still leave with my mums family and I don't go to them. for anything GOD BLESS MY MUM AND MY DAD! GOD BESS ME AND GOD BLESS EVERY ONE OF US

am a victim of this story but my mum is forcing them on me..

There are certain situation you dont need to hurriedly come to conclusion.
I think its not only that she (your mother) was treated badly by her former husband family that's making her act like that.

Maybe she is hindering you from unforseen danger (not 100% sure tho).

I will advice you to meet your mother again, and ask her the reasons for her actions.

My instinct is telling me that there is something she is hiding

Also, be prayerful, there is no problem God can't solve.
Cheers

LegendDrogba:
This is MY REAL LIFE STORY not some nollywood movie, pls help me out. lalasticlala pls help.

bros pray to God to help interven in this matter. to touch and soften ur mum's heart.Also be patient so also d family.