Hmmmmmmmmmmn

I'm pretty sure, it's not a one night stand. . .it's up 2 u 2 forgive or not.

did she actually write 'dear boyzone' in that suicide note letter  
but on a serious note i think i wud kill her. . .fear women, my friend used to say a woman brought u into this world and a woman can definately take u out

life is not what it seems. Your story is one
which goes on to confirm the saying that we live
in a strange land seeking daily for the reason why
we are here. I will say you already know what to do?
don't be carried away by your emotions, take a rest
think straight, you don't deserve this as she puts it.
take heart man.

all i can say is u'v don nothing wrong, take her back, if u truly love her, considering it happened by mistake and seeing her reactions to the mater, God be with u,

"wisdom is profitable to direct"

do not be in a haste to make your decision. there are always 2 or more sides to a story. u guys should sit down and talk it over very well. we all make mistakes and some mistakes are costlier than others.

we do not throw away the baby along with the bath water. she has made a grave mistake but two wrongs bros dont make a right.

talk it over with her pls, i dont support her in anyway. but what makes you think u wud be happy urself if she goes, or u would even find someone else dat wudnt disaapoint u again!

its hard dear but Gods grace is sufficient, it wud take time to heal or get over it but u guys should discuss and implore her to be truthful about d whole issue as u may not entertain anymore surprises when u get over this one.

good luck bro

if the story is true then your wife is as dumb as a doorknob - unprotected sex , no contraceptives(morning after pill) and she didn't think to terminate it?

stupid bitch

better go and do hiv test sharp sharp

This is really a very sad story and typical of our women today,there is no reason whatsoever for one to indulge in such things,if i were in the same situation i will not expect any body to understand with me for whatsoever reason i will give,sincerely if the Bible say the only reason why you can divorce your wife is adultery and for me it ends there full stop.She is bringing all those emotional stuff,did she thought of you before she indulged in that and like someone said,it wasn't a one night stand.It was a deliberate act.

the decision is up to u, it either u stay with ur wife and live with the memory of what happened for the rest of ur life or u let her go and forget about her.but it is sad story indeed

Oluwa wa ooo!!

So she's didn't notice her period for good 5 months

It is well bro,

My brother i am really sorry if your story is true as related, but i have reasons to believe you because i have been a victim of such occurence which i dont like remembering.

Marital issues should not be decided in a hurry because it has a long term implication, you need to calm down and do some thinking, ultimately its your decision that counts but in deciding what to do ,kindly consider the following factors:

1. Your wife had an unprotected sex, it only points to two things either she isnt intelligent ,matured, or she wanted the pregnancy anyway damning the consequence , imagine if she caught HIV in da process , you would be infected by now,and remember she wasnt raped that could have been a different story.

2. How are you sooo sure that it was a one night stand,and that she hasnt been sleeping around when you were away.

3. Ok lets assume she had a one night stand but she kept the information away from you,this is somebody who you should be able to trust with your last breath is that the quality of a life partner? , and what if you happen to discover the secret through an outsider maybe 5 years down the line, will your heart not be irretrievably broken?

4. She probably knew you werent responsible for the baby when she took in, yet she kept it for you so that you can father another man's child ,is that not a heartless attitude,do you need such from a life partner?

5. How are you soo sure that she wont repeat thesame thing in the future and are you sure she really loves you? If anything bad should happen to you as you are presently,are you sure she wont do a worse thing? She may actually be in love with the father of that child but she wants to marry you because of some material/ephemeral reasons, you may be delaying the evil day, so think deeply on what to do.


May God guide your decision.

i lack words. What i really don't understand is wether love exits before the marriage

in my opinion, i feel he should decide between sending her back hom with the baby or flushing it and forgiving her, its harsh but it'll be harder to deal with it later if he continues.and moreover, we dont know what plans the lady has for him, gross!

@Op; Your post doesnt seem real, more like a page from a fictional magazine.

Nezan:

@Op; Your post doesnt seem real, more like a page from a fictional magazine.

I thot i was the only way thinking that way, cos a man that his wife got belle for another man wont have the time to come and post on nairaland.
But i wanna give the dude the benefit of the doubt sha.

The poster dey lie jare.

Let me get this clear.
You love your wife and you had been away from her for a long period of time, and naturally one would expect you would bed down with her as soon as you guys re-united. So how the hell can you say you did not realise that she was 5 months pregnant?

i'm not a girl and all that, but at 5 months + pregnancy is usually pretty visible. Taking a pregnancy test at 7 months?

I'm not buying this cock and bull story

YOU ARE TRULY NOT A GIRL.First pregnancies could be concealed forever. Some of the time, they start showing shortly before delivery.

Who is that bushman suggesting a beating? Do you want him to commit murder? If he can have the courage to accept the baby, good, if not he can tell her to leave. There are many men in the world living knowingly or unknowingly with other people's kids calling them 'daddy'.[/b]

hahahahahah

How can she have sex with a stranger and decide to keep it. It must be someone she is very intimate with. Someone who she knows too well.

Considering the the efforts you have been making to bring her closer, how can she be sex starved as to sleep with a stranger.

Ok lets assume she had a one night stand but she kept the information away from you,this is somebody who you should be able to trust with your last breath is that the quality of a life partner? , and what if you happen to discover the secret through an outsider maybe 5 years down the line, will your heart not be irretrievably broken?

Personally, i don't consider this offence as forgiveable given an African view point. But may God guide your decision. Its your decision than counts.

[color=#006600

vicade:

The poster dey lie jare.

i don't think so. . .most naija women who have husbands abroad sleeps arround.

no1madman:

i don't think so. . .most naija women who have husbands abroad sleeps arround.

Yes they do, but they will not be that stupid as to get belle for the man and go carry 5 months belle for another man and the man too no even know till she was 7 months preggy.

i will just advise you check deep down urself maybe u have in one way or the offended your use to be sweetheart

demmielove:

i will just advise you check deep down urself maybe u have in one way or the offended your use to be sweetheart

Nonsense!!!!!! Offended her to the extent of keeping some1 else's baby wat r u saying? let's face it frm an african angle,She is a LovePeddler to have stabbed the poster in his chest

Fhemmmy:

Yes they do, but they will not be that stupid as to get belle for the man and go carry 5 months belle for another man and the man too no even know till she was 7 months preggy.

right. . .very very stupid.i feel 4 d guy,he must have trusted d woman.he doesn't know that women can be unfaithful within a minute if given d chance.

no1madman:

right. . .very very stupid.i feel 4 d guy,he must have trusted d woman.he doesn't know that women can be unfaithful within a minute if given d chance.

To find a faithful woman is like looking for a virgin man. . . but most will at least hide it, but he did it to this dude's face, she must have really hate him bad

She was not sorry for what she did but was sorry that she was caught.She was not aware that she is not preggo for 5 months? Common bro!!!
If you didn't find out she would have pin the baby on you. Forgive her but let her go because you will never forget whenever you see the baby and you will never trust her or treat her well even if she become a nun.Men are egocentric.You will always have the image of another making love to her in your mind.
If you keep her you will become the most miserable man on earth because you don't know who is aware.Every comment about cheating women will remind you of her actions.
Her story is not true she kept a friend in 9ja(co-worker i guess).It takes two to tangle.Random sex occur with condom but sex with a regular is majorly without condom.
I am sincerely sympathetic with you because she has distroyed your life of love and trust.You will find it difficult to trust again.
FORGIVE HER AND LET HER GO.Let your family know the reason for your actions,she can tell hers if she want.
Cheers

She may have been emotionally down to sleep with a stranger at a party. Whatever her reasons, it does not justify her actions but i'll advise that you find a place in your heart to forgive her and move along with life. All the the best.

EDIT: Just read the entire thing, WOW!!!

NO COMMENT!

@poster

What i dont get is, why did she keep the pregnancy and bring it down to the US, when she knows shes married,

I pray God teaches you what to do,

@ Poster

Bros your situation unique no be small

You are in a bit of a CONUNDRUM here.

At the end its up to you. If you can envision yourself dealling with this situation then carry on. If not then leave the thing alone oh!

CHEI!

@poster.  she didnt know till 5 months? quickening starts at 4 month, periods durring pregnancy will last a max of 3 months.  at 7 month the movement of the baby is very easy to notice by others by touching her belly.  something is hinky here