oloyede252:
sequence to this thread " Do You Think Married Women Should Tender Their Salaries To Their Husbands?.many females are of the opinion that husband's have No business with their wife salaries, which now beg the question "Do You Think Married men should tell their wife how much they earn"

YES. Let me tell you a story. There was a man that used to work in Shell, he earned very well and doing great.
His wife was a NYSC corper when they got married. He refused to disclose his salary to his wife. He categorically said his wife has no business with his salary.

The wife did her Youth Corp in Total Oil and Gas, so she put in her resume and did very well in the interview and fortunately got a very big job with Total. Her salary was bigger than the hubby's. She started investing her money, bought lands, properties, cars and powerful things that hubby cannot even dare.

The hubby wanted to know how much she earns, and she blatantly told him its none of his business. He was worried and started telling his friends. They all blamed him, because he ripped what he sowed.

There is no BIG deal in telling your wife how much you earn. Wives are better money managers, men will not want to believe this because of egos. As long as she knows your income, she will plan with you how things will continue to be better.

oloyede252:
there is No need for insult..I see, child care is your main problem.in an average family anywhere in the world women do More than men in taking care of their children so I don't see it as a Nigerian problem.
what your problem with Nigerian men.

Dont mind that frustrated fellis.

God will provide a man for her so that her bitterness towards men will reduce.

by the definition of "a married man",its obviously known to be a man who has a woman he cares for and sees his vision coming together to build a family.So there is nothing with him telling his wife what he earns because it will make her more Equitable and able to manage their family resource especially when he earns little and it will also enable them plan for the future together

chrisj2:


Furthermore, in the UK, most people can have a rough idea and good guestimate of what others earn - that is if you are an employee and do normal jobs not a merchant banker, or work for a multi-nationals or at the very high level in the entertainment/media industry.

For me, it is not about how much the spouses earn but how much investment and personal savings and assets they have - and their liabilities/debts should also be factored in.

I do not think it is necessary to fully disclose everything - being married does not stop the person being an individual and being an individual and does help (sometimes) in terms of financial management. Again, it could be negative - as the other half might be buried in debt without disclosure. I am very good with money and I do trust myself to invest in the future of myself and family. Full disclosure might help especially with folks wanting this and that and the other half might want to splash out on this or that..

Why should a woman or man submit his or her salary or wages in a marriage - this is why a joint account comes in: the contribution ratio depends on individual circumstances - the wife might earn more than the man or the income of one or both might vary if they are business people or freelance.

* You should always have a bit of you in every relationship!

I tire ooo dis tin na marriage no be prison or partnership business na.
Every1 just making it seems as if not disclosing ur full income 4rm every source automatically makes u a bad husband
Truth is not every1 would end up with a good wife (abeg no b person go marry all dis bad girls wey plenty 4 town now) so full disclosure shld depend on d type of wife u marry.
If I end up with a good wife (which I pray I do and currently working on) I may then decide to disclose fully if not I swear I go divide my salary by 4 tell am 1/4
I

tosyne2much:
[i] So you no fit let your gf sef know the weight of your bank account?

I dey crase?
When no be say dem table my matter 4 village
I still consider wife u dey talk of gf
My guy my future is important to me

Well so far, I think have learnt something and 4 now o I don calculate as I go do am even tho am not getting married anytime soon
Its seems most pple tink is cool I may tell her sha depending on d kind of person she is but I tell her she is allowed to advise or if she d good type I pray most time tell me how we spend 9/10 if salary is below 201k 4/5 201 to 1m, 1m above 3/4
the remmaing part no concern am at all At all. Make she just maintain her lane.

Ugik:
by the definition of "a married man",its obviously known to be a man who has a woman he cares for and sees his vision coming together to build a family.So there is nothing with him telling his wife what he earns because it will make her more Equitable and able to manage their family resource especially when he earns little and it will also enable them plan for the future together

Sorry I don't get. Are u trying to say buhari is not married

One word: marriage is not competition but a union.
You are one with your wife and vice versa. She should know you, and vice versa.
One + one = one in marriage
Both of you should: have one mind, one compromise. Always find a way to agree to agree, and disagree to disagree.

1bkaye:
Different couples, different arrangements. I personally would want to know how much he earns and will also let him know of my earnings. I plan to have some sort of joint account with my spouse where we'll probably deposit agreed amounts monthly that will be used to settle common expenses. Separate to our own individual personal accounts.

I hate the idea of "sharing responsibilities' with my wife! It is my house, my family, my responsibility.
If her, is part of my responsibility, whether she earns or not

She earns a lot, l know but l dont go around trying to find out.
She can take up any responsibility (voluntarily) she wants to, within the family.
She has no business with how much l earn, that would be trying to 'size me up', resulting eventually in 'see-finish'!

I made the 'operating rules' for my own house, before l married her.
She agreed to live by those rules, hence we got married, and still married. (The day she rebels, then the contract will be invalidated)

Marriage is less about emotions of love but more about 'understanding the T & C of the contract'.
That way, everyone stays cool with the other.
No disrespect, No muscle flexing.

1bkaye:
Different couples, different arrangements. I personally would want to know how much he earns and will also let him know of my earnings. I plan to have some sort of joint account with my spouse where we'll probably deposit agreed amounts monthly that will be used to settle common expenses. Separate to our own individual personal accounts.

My sister.. ..nor try am.. ..i repeat.. Nor try am.. .I'm a guy but I know what I'm saying

PaperLace:


When did TENDER and TELL become synonyms?

The problem wasn't telling, the problem was/is tendering all the money she worked for all through the month to her horseband.
So, go edit you topic_ Should a husband tender his salary to his wife? The keyword here is TENDER!

.
Apparently this is the most intelligent comment I've ever seen on nairaland

Is very obvious most people commenting here r nt married. In Nigeria is everything u earn DAT u tell yr wife.those things work best abroad. It might b rosy in d first few yrs of marriage but as d years geos by suspicion will come in.women will always b women. Keep joint account if u can but both of u shud v yr personal account.

Is very obvious most people commenting here r nt married. In Nigeria is nt everything u earn DAT u tell yr wife.those things work best abroad. It might b rosy in d first few yrs of marriage but as d years geos by suspicion will come in.women will always b women. Keep joint account if u can but both of u shud v yr personal account.

Excuzeme:


I hate the idea of "sharing responsibilities' with my wife! It is my house, my family, my responsibility.
If her, is part of my responsibility, whether she earns or not

She earns a lot, l know but l dont go around trying to find out.
She can take up any responsibility (voluntarily) she wants to, within the family.
She has no business with how much l earn, that would be trying to 'size me up', resulting eventually in 'see-finish'!

I made the 'operating rules' for my own house, before l married her.
She agreed to live by those rules, hence we got married, and still married. (The day she rebels, then the contract will be invalidated)

Marriage is less about emotions of love but more about 'understanding the T & C of the contract'.
That way, everyone stays cool with the other.
No disrespect, No muscle flexing.

Your wife is effectively your property right?

Na real wa

No be una fault sha, i'm sure your views will be different if divorce laws becomes favourable to women and judges aren't compromised

oloyede252:
sequence to this thread " Do You Think Married Women Should Tender Their Salaries To Their Husbands?.many females are of the opinion that husband's have No business with their wife salaries, which now beg the question "Do You Think Married men should tell their wife how much they earn"

No. Reason? Most women plan their lives and expenditure patterns around this info. Tell them N100 and they draw up a working N100 plan. Tell them you get N10m a month and they tell you how humans can no longer survive on N9m a month . Tell them what you earn and you'll never have any extra change to do anything else or help anyone else (apart from nuclear family, their ppl and their interests), and every penny you spend becomes subjected to extreme scrutiny. It's just how they're wired. Forget the politically and feministically correct responses. It's almost always a very bad idea.

No!!! It's his money he can decide whether or Not to tell anyone.
but however he can tell his wife how much he is willing to spend each month. same goes for the wife

eyinjuege:
Well, most men that don't want wahala will let their wives know how much they earn, otherwise the expectations will be too much.
Most people assume you earn more than you actually do and make unreasonable demands.
If as a man your salary isn't so great, and you can hardly keep up with payments, you had better let your wife know and face the reality. Her expectations and demands won't be unreasonable, and within your salary scale.
Some men even hand over their salaries to their wives. She supplements it with her own to run the house, pay household bills, school fees and all what not.
Though if you earn so much monthly, you can still get away with not letting her know cos you can always meet all demands. In fact, you see some really rich guys who live moderately, drive small cars, stays in a nice but small apartment who don't like an ostentatious lifestyle. Their wives will even be pitying them that they're demanding too much, not knowing they're wealthy .
But all in all, its a good idea to let your spouse know your earnings so you can all plan your spendings wisely.
She knowing how much you earn doesn't mean she's gonna be in charge of your finances especially if you don't trust her spending habits.

That is when man's slavery commences

Afisbobo:

I dey crase?
When no be say dem table my matter 4 village
I still consider wife u dey talk of gf
My guy my future is important to me

You just dey make me laf

What God has join together, let no man put asunder.

Salary should not be an issue with your wife not GF.

Some women are very good financial managers like my wife.

All that I have achieved in 3yrs will never have been if not for my wife.

She handles the finances with all diligence and I am very grateful for that.

May be I am blessed.

In my own opinion,I think its best for the couple to know each other's income in order for good management of the home...A man loves it with the wife is open to him in everything including d financial aspect likewise the wife..it makes love & unity to abide as well in the home

Personally I don't care how much he earns as long as he does the needful

oloyede252:
sequence to this thread " Do You Think Married Women Should Tender Their Salaries To Their Husbands?.many females are of the opinion that husband's have No business with their wife salaries, which now beg the question "Do You Think Married men should tell their wife how much they earn"

.....i believe if you are married to someone....he/she has the right to know evrytin abt u....what u do with such knowlegde is determined by ur level of maturity...

TheArchangel:
Same thing na, if child care = 70 :30
Then bills should be split 30:70. Nobody should cheat the other. Period.

While Reading some of the post from mostly females of naija it irritates me and I tend to understand why guys barely marry nowadays. I wonder where you guys got this nauseating orientation from so now marriage is a business? with two shareholders where percentage are shared?! WTF!!! lord save me and all from fams and pals from such females. If I can watch MY KIDS at night so that my lovely future wife who is weak or really need some sleep to rest I will gladly do it, bathe them? take them to school?! do whatever ?! what the hell I'd my job as the man of the house if I can't do all these things?!?!! I love kids like crazy and can't wait to have mine with a queen that understand what life, marriage and more truly means because you all clearly don't know squat. You all worry about money and taking care of family like its been unnecessarily imposed on you all ( both males and females) when you got into marriage that's WTF you signed up for but most of you don't know, I bet most of the ladies rambling that a man should do this and that had a terrible dad or relation that shaped their goddamn mind this crazy. I learned a lot from just observing my folks, that's why you hear people talking about Love especially females when they don't know ish about it, they think its telemundo. if you love your wife/husband why won't you help them in anyway possible? I reiterate anyway? as regards to chores then financially it another issue because most times some females tend to be materialistic, they put their wants over there needs and don't understand how the scale of preference works at all so telling her how much I earn would be me setting the family up for bankruptcy. Most females know that their urge to buy more directly reflects to how much their husband earns, if he earns a million monthly they want at least around 300,000 or more but if the think you earn around 100,000 they will mostly subliminally minimize it to around 40,000-50,000 so my point is it depends. if you get a wife that understands the scale of preference, rainy days, future projects and retirement plans/savings and not materialistic then by all means share your financial plans and info with her but if you're with these "I want to know how much he earns" so that I can leech more on him and manipulate him to buy the latest car for me asap each time the come out then by all means cut that leech off your salary and if its a must then tell her half your salary is what you earn and ensure she never finds out. a woman can be a blessing to your life or a furious, destructive devil in your life so know the one that is around you and know how to dance with the devil. TAKING CARE OF THE KIDS IS BOTH PARENTS JOB, whining about changing diapers like its rocket science? mtcheeeeew too many drama queens, you see fellas they all want to get married but they don't have the required skills to start, run and take care of a family.

dollarlander:


YES. Let me tell you a story. There was a man that used to work in Shell, he earned very well and doing great.
His wife was a NYSC corper when they got married. He refused to disclose his salary to his wife. He categorically said his wife has no business with his salary.

The wife did her Youth Corp in Total Oil and Gas, so she put in her resume and did very well in the interview and fortunately got a very big job with Total. Her salary was bigger than the hubby's. She started investing her money, bought lands, properties, cars and powerful things that hubby cannot even dare.

The hubby wanted to know how much she earns, and she blatantly told him its none of his business. He was worried and started telling his friends. They all blamed him, because he ripped what he sowed.

There is no BIG deal in telling your wife how much you earn. Wives are better money managers, men will not want to believe this because of egos. As long as she knows your income, she will plan with you how things will continue to be better.

your post is nice but you ruined it with the "wives are better money managers" and used men's ego as an excuse to escape logical and critical judgement. fk that wives are better money managers dear its crappy because if we are to go by statistics men rule the wallstreet and dominate most financial institutions and more and are doing great and innovating ways to enhance financial management more than our female folks but we're in the little wife/husband circus so let me tell you both the wives or husbands can be wonderful managers or money squandering can be the thing the know best so let's leave gender out of it, regards to op post it depends, if the wife is financially responsible and can make good decisions then she should know but if she's just like most of the untrained, educated illiterates that don't know nothing about future plans, df bw needs and wants then hell no he shouldn't tell her and vice versa. Let the individual with better money managing skills do the best for the team but its better to have two good heads than one dummy who will be pulling the other backwards.

missyge:
Yes, a husband should tell his wife how much he earns. A good wife would manage his money....

Manage his money like its a responsibility that the ring/marriage automatically bestow on every wife, you guys are really funny AF. is she a professional financial advisor? if she got some good ideas let her bring it to the table for critical analysis and stuff, you say it like every woman knows how to handle money which you know is fallacy. Get your facts right dear. They both can run home management, decisions and a lot together instead of putting each in a box unless he's a dummy then the wife can manage like you said but if any sensible male can cone up with an idea, make and sell it I bet he will be able to manage his finance too though an intelligent wife's suggestion is much expected other than a bag of leech who's aim to know his salary is to jot down every new shoe or bag to buy in other to compete with or show off to her friends which is the ulterior motive of most. The answer is, IT DEPENDS on the wife's personality. Makes nonsense giving tangible information to individuals that won't make positive impact or move with the info the were given.

icedbeatz:
Manage his money like its a responsibility that the ring/marriage automatically bestow on every wife, you guys are really funny AF. is she a professional financial advisor? if she got some good ideas let her bring it to the table for critical analysis and stuff, you say it like every woman knows how to handle money which you know is fallacy. Get your facts right dear. They both can run home management, decisions and a lot together instead of putting each in a box unless he's a dummy then the wife can manage like you said but if any sensible male can cone up with an idea, make and sell it I bet he will be able to manage his finance too though an intelligent wife's suggestion is much expected other than a bag of leech who's aim to know his salary is to jot down every new shoe or bag to buy in other to compete with or show off to her friends which is the ulterior motive of most. The answer is, IT DEPENDS on the wife's personality. Makes nonsense giving tangible information to individuals that won't make positive impact or move with the info the were given.

Givng u an answr based on wat u just said will lead to arguments. unfortunately i dnt hv time for dat now

Dadsonval:
Yes of course!

OK dear can you tell me why should a husband tell his wife how much he earns?

missyge:
Givng u an answr based on wat u just said will lead to arguments. unfortunately i dnt hv time for dat now

OK give me the benefit of a doubt dear, I'll like to know . what's your answer and why please?
Pls try to apply facts and statistics to it without sentiments if you can.

misterawo:
I don't tell my wife how much I earn. Doing so will lead to flimsy demands.

Now here is a wise man, discovering a problem which are likely to make flimsy demands ( expected from most females no doubt they will ask for more if they know you earn more) if she knew your earnings and applying the solution which is not telling her. Enjoy your life boss.

mukhcech:


If I wasn't married. I would probably ask for your hand in marriage.

hahahahahaa but based on what really? #HastyDecisions
#Don'tJudgeABookByItsCover

icedbeatz:
OK dear can you tell me why should a husband tell his wife how much he earns?

Why should their be secrecy in Marriage?
That singular action is highly suggestive of underlying trust issues

Honesty should be encouraged at all times

IF either party has issues with managing/understanding realistic expectation then they need to revisit that squarely

icedbeatz:
OK give me the benefit of a doubt dear, I'll like to know . what's your answer and why please?
Pls try to apply facts and statistics to it without sentiments if you can.

Managing his mony dosnt mean she has to b a financial advisor...If u love ur wife,;den dias nothg wrng in her knwng how much u earn. I bliv with dat, she wont demand mre dan wat u can provide. She knws wen u have and do not. Dats wat i mean by managing nd nthg else...