Why bring up a piece based on your emotions to ask such a naive question if U are a bad son. Yes, U are! And don't be carried away by ill advisedly crafted opinions of ur likes here in Nairaland. Certainly, Nairaland is full of teenagers and the young. Never talk ill of ur parents about your frustrations again. That alone make U a bad child.

Character moulding is a prime responsibility of parents. They were once in ur position and had all your current experiences, so stop the wailings. You painted a narrow picture of all that's going on there to seek for pity right? As to why U are a bad child, there's more U didn't say. The tendencies U exhibit is being prunned to avoid the mistakes ur parents had, they may not have told U. A parent wants the best for a child like U, to at least surpass their own achievements in their time. Avoid this rhetorical and cyclical innuendos that is bane of most families and take the necessary corrections. Even if U make 350 score in Jamb, there is still room for more. Stop being proud and rude. You are arrogant and egoistic to me. Look I'm a parent, and have children of ur age and so I know what I'm talking. Your sex feels is worrisome due to your early exposure, why shouldn't your parents be worry about U and treat U to avoid the trend. A teenager always think he's arrived, the same errors all of them makes. What have U said about God, ur maker. Do U know how to pray? How obedient are U to your parents, and how obedient are U to God whom U never see. I don't have all the day to write my mind here. The scraps written by ur likes here is annoying and I feel is more damaging. Try to feel ur parents and understand that they are meant to train U, a responsibility placed upon them by God. And be humble to learn and take ur time. You rush and U rush out of live. Everybody is not the same. Stop the comparisons, U are not yet in school but ur dullard mates are there, yes! Their destiny is different, face urs. Enough of bickerings and negative thoughts of suicide, hatred and so on. Haba!

FriedYam:
thank you so much. I'll act on number 1 nd 2. Number three is impossible. Only school can get me out of the house. I respect my parents a lot tho. I have plans to go into agriculture in my third yr... Build an agro company nd start an empire from there... Before 23... Sadly, they think ion have any plans for tomorrow.

Thanks again

Your only problem is that you are a guy growing up in the midst of so many women and they want you to be a woman. Your dad is not helping matters by behaving like them. He should know (as a man and former boy) that he too went through this stage you are going through now. That period your hormones run riot and you want to try so many silly stuffs. He should create some buddy time with you and make you realise that this time shall pass and all you need to focus on is a bright future.

To your mum and sisters, they are using you to have fun and experiment till they tip you over, before they will realise that the situation don pass be careful.

In all you sound very smart, unlike your peers. Very smart kiddos are very curios kids.

stevocracy88:

Then you need the Grace of God. #kontinuuuuu

It's normal to every household,when you are a male child at 18yrs of age it's normal don't even put spirituality in this.

Concentrate all your effort in gaining admission and moving out of the house.
If takes you filling a Course you have passion for and will make it easier to gain admission.
And most importantly, keep been the good person you are, with time they will all see the good in you and realise thier mistakes.

Bro... there is a lot of misconceptions going on in your family.
your parent need adolescents management counseling. Another thing your parent need to understand is how your career can be influenced either negatively or positively. they also need career counseling also. and you, u need to understand what behaviour modification is. U can mail me @oluwaseyivictor12@gmail.com. Am a counseling psychologist. thanks

Are you a Lagos base citizen?

op


go and start shooting adult films codedly by the time u get to 20 OK n bang as many olosho n even ladies older Dan u

Uhmmm , I have bee

baby124:
Why do you keep going to centers known for Expo? You see where you are self sabotaging? If maths is your challenge, sit down and work it. Maths is not hard at all, we just have very bad teachers in Nigeria. They do not know how to teach, neither do they know the fundamentals of what they are teaching. And they like to scare students with ridiculous scoring techniques to cover up their incompetence.

As for Jamb, why can't you use your 257 score? JAMB is now valid for a number of years. Please find out when that law took effect to see if your 257 can be used for the next admission cycle. Forget what your father is saying about that score. You are the one sitting at home, not him. If he doesn't want to help you process admission on the score, you find money and attempt the processing yourself. You are a man at 18.

Please and please, do not let any words put you down. Nigerian parents think being abusive towards their kids is constructive criticism. It's not. You are frustrated which is to be expected. So you need to help yourself. Let go of the frustration and all the harsh words and get to work. Don't wait till last minute to study for JAMB. You don't need to pull all nighter for JAMB if you prepare over a good amount of time.

If law is where you see yourself you will make it in. All these failures are a set up for your future study habits. With the way you study last minute and rely on expo, you will have failed in Uni. Change your study habit and commit to 3hrs daily at least 6months to JAMB. Also try to find something to do to occupy and develop your mind outside of your study time. Something positive like learning a trade.

Believe in yourself, not what your parents, friends and strangers believe you to be. Ask yourself who you want to be and what you want to be. Then work hard to make that possible. Zone out all the noise.

it's a new law and it will take effect as from next year

we teens we going through a lot of shit mehn...
we can't do what will make us happy, just act by the rules given that's all they want....it's appalling especially those of us that we are not in uni yet

op can u kindly pm me ur number we need to talk privately I think I can be of help to u

FriedYam:
about friends.

I move with responsible friends as I'm quick to sieve out bad ones.

My friend have style. They dress nice, barb stylish cuts like low layers nd low cut.

My parents use hairstyle to judge my friends. If the haircut is high, the guy is a smoker, rapist, cultist and whatever, just name it. Even the ones with low cut don't escape. I grew up practically locked inside the house till now. I'm given no room to talk to anyone outside.

Dad saw a junior of mine from the school i finished from. The dude was only informing me of their upcoming inter-house sports at school nd was inviting me. I was called inside the house and welcomed with punches nd slaps from dad who was a former karate guru. Why? because the boy usually ddnt greet him. I was punched to stupour.

Now, they think I smoke weed..... They are even convinced that I do. I gave a barber money to help me mix stuffs that'll help hair that was thinning. The man mixed weed in it. I applied it nd it worked. Mum found out nd now I'm a chain smoker... She's told dad nd they both think i'm a smoker cos i sumtimes react angrilly due to the irritation from the fact that i'm still home when my friend are in school. The call it the effect of weed.

Why am i telling nl? I don't know. I've got no one to talk to.
I'm amidst my fam but feel like an outcast.

Tis is just a tip of what I'm going tru

Its very hard most time but what can really help you is Prayer and Reading your Bible regular. It will keep your mind busy and guide you on how to get along with your parent.
You can start from the New Ttestament. If you trully want a change

Bro u just take it easy with life. And please learn not to compare ursef with frends or colleagues.you have ur own special lane, dey have theirs. Also always remembe God has a special plan fr u.
I sent u a mail I wish u reply, I have a lot to share with you which I knw will encourage u.

FriedYam:
About sex. I was introduced to sex at a very tender age. 6 precisely by one of those big aunties. Consitently abused till age nine. However, since then, I havent had sex. Maybe this is the reason why anything sexual gets me erect in a flash but I can't help it. I've tried but I get erect most times even when I'm not thinking of sex. I may lie down to sleep nd wake up erect to discover someone saw me. Or maybe I'm just chatting on phone, not anything related to sex, I'll get erect. My fam have seen me dodging this several times. They think I'm having sex. They think I'm a pervert nd think every girl is unsafe with me. Its not lack of chance that's made me not have sex, I want to, but it doesnt seem right, si i just abstained.

A female friend got me 1500# airtime on my bday last yr. Her bday came nd I decided to repay her buy buying a sandal for her.. Mum saw it nd concluded that I had a gf nd was having sex. The house has been hell for me. Dad heard nd now every single wrong I do, I get to hear about my rapist tendencies nd numerous girlfriend ion know abt.

I'm handsome, i look like dad. Very handsome so they think I'm using that to get girls.

I've been depressed severally and thought of suicide many times... A whole lot of other things have happened too which i cant say

Like when i was 12 nd was sprouting pubic hair. Ws so fascinated that i used to pull the hair evrynight to make sure it was there. Mum entered my room at night nd caught my hands in my boxer, I was doing my nightly check. She screamed, said i was masturbating. Ddnt even know what the word meant. Since then They knew me at home as a porn addict nd masturbator... i ddnt even know what they meant.

Tat's abt sex

You're very young so its normal to have high testosterone, meaning any thing will make u hard even if its not sexual. As for masturbation, some kids masturbate cos they can't get laid, so they use that to curb the tension, some masturbate cos they see it as a lesser sin compare to having sex, while some abstain from it due to religion believe or due to having regular sex.

Its okay if they thing you're masturbating/porn addict, what's important is what you think/how you see yourself.

And as for your failure, know that many have fail and still rise again, hell had it been I failed as during my WAEC/NECO prolly I won't have failed as hard as I did during my university days, but then again it all depend on me to turn that failure into a success. If law is the only course you want to study then keep working hard towards getting a higher grade, feeling sorry for ur self or feeling misunderstood won't help u, so direct that negative energy towards studying.

Lastly don't give room for suicidal thoughts, we all go through failures in life and if you plan on being successful then you'll see more days of failure so try and embrace it, that's the only way to overcome it.

justscorchone:
I don't really see your problem?

Yes I agree, if you can do wonder with pencil, then draw your parent wearing glasses that the lens are dirty and looking at an handsome baby in a cot. when you are through show it to them. and tell them with tears in your eyes that "Dad, mum you see that handsome baby in the cot is me and as long as you have the dirty glasses on your face you can't see any good thing in me, but dad, mum there is a solution; all you both need to do is to take off the dirty glasses." immediately you tell them this, gently leave the place and go to your room. call us back later to tell us what they did afterwards. cheers

FriedYam:
according to my father, any course other than law, med nd engineering is for lazy people.. Even art...nd that's my talent, I make wonders with pencil

pls indulge in ur craft and it willmake you happy. you can post sample of your drawings let see. its just a phase u passing tru wen I was 18 I wrote a letter to my mum saying I hated her but today I must tell you she is the person I love most..

TheSixthSense:
Okay, but I will place my bet on family any day and trust me. I could give numerous hypothetical situations that friend(s) would eventually abandon not because they don't care but because there is a limit to what they can do.

You do have a point tho....

Lol...dis guy is living my former life....
Dad used to lock us In house when I was younger, we got so scared of him to the extent that when we hear our dad is back our heart rate increase 20times faster.....

FriedYam iam just a year above u tho, started school very early but now my mates are in their final year while iam @ home (UI also Messed me up).....FriedYam u have to take a stand on ur life..its urs...u don't want to be in a situation where you will blame ur parents for your woes.....u want to study arts go for it' ur parents might not support you financially but guy whatever becomes of you in future u can't hold anyone responsible.....my parents didn't support my first dream now its too late...now I want to study graphic arts...I'll hustle my cash, get GCE and a laptop I don't care if my folks help or not I'll get there someday..its not going to be easy but I'll get there when I get there...

Like you d only thing that can take me out of d house is school but iam working on accomodation in a church sponsored hostel...I have determined to make something out of me....


FRIEDYAM UR LIFE IS IN YOUR HANDS....

foody:
Yes I agree, if you can do wonder with pencil, then draw your parent wearing glasses that the lens are dirty and looking at an handsome baby in a cot. when you are through show it to them. and tell them with tears in your eyes that "Dad, mum you see that handsome baby in the cot is me and as long as you have the dirty glasses on your face you can't see any good thing in me, but dad, mum there is a solution; all you both need to do is to take off the dirty glasses." immediately you tell them this, gently leave the place and go to your room. call us back later to tell us what they did afterwards. cheers

You made no gaddamn sense woman, the OP is just overreacting for nothing because this is normal in every home,I should know.i grew up in a family of 4 girls and just me,it may seem to OP they are being mean and all that but it's just their own way of shielding him ,with all the whole terrible news we hear on the daily I would have been more worried if he's parents don't keep an eye on their son (only son) .dude is just in a hurry to grow up,in this part of the world being 18yrs still makes you a kid under your parents,so OP if you are reading this.just calm the fvck down and keep being the obedient child that you are,enjoy being home and the little joys it offers now because when that time comes that you gain admission and move to school you will be yearning to be back home.also you wouldn't know it yet but your parents being picky about your friends will influence you unconsciously when making friends in a distant land.







Why did you quote me though?

Are you currently in Ibadan?

FriedYam:
thank you so much. I'll act on number 1 nd 2. Number three is impossible. Only school can get me out of the house. I respect my parents a lot tho. I have plans to go into agriculture in my third yr... Build an agro company nd start an empire from there... Before 23... Sadly, they think ion have any plans for tomorrow.

Thanks again

Wow!!!!! I had a similar experience bro! but with my mother's younger sis. I made my waec but didn't write further maths the day I was suppose to because there was a bridge in information and I couldn't give anyone my phone number because if I get a call from anyone asides family, im in trouble. I went for my exam thinking it was an afternoon paper but it turned out to be a morning paper, so absentee appeared in my waec result for further maths. The day I checked my result, I had mixed feelings because I knew I was in for it. I had 3 bs and 4cs and 1d in my waec and the d was in a Nigerian language. I got home and waited for her to return to work and when I showed it to her, not even a congratulation or anything, the first question was what happened to further maths? told her the story and come see beating. she was very particular about it because I was a science student and I was also asked to fill I for elect/elect engineering because that was the only course asides computer science that could give me a good leverage when im done with the university. I wrote jamb twice and didn't get the admission and was later sent to for pre-degree for the same elect/elect engineering and still I didn't get admission through pre-degree. I went back home because I was living in school during my pre-degree days because that was the only thing that could get me out of home. I returned home after not getting the admission through pre-degree, the house became hell on earth for me. in February 2012, I used the money my mum sent to me to buy a jamb form which was already late, I was living in lagos but lagos centre was filled as at the time I applied but without my aunty's consent because went outside the country. Before she returned, I had written my jamb and guess what the lowest score I ever had in all the jamb exam I had written(188) but I filled financial management in futo because I had economics in my waec so it also gave a better chance. I wrote the post utme and scored 280 and around November my name was out but before then my aunty threw me out of her house for not seeking her consent before buying the form so I left her house in april and started leaving with my parents as they had just relocated from the north to lagos then. When I got the admission, my parent practically had no idea of how I would even pay my acceptance fee but God was merciful and he divinely provided for me. When I stayed with my aunt, I remember greeting one of my male teachers and she stopped the car because I greeted him form inside her car and asked who he was. I remember days I was flogged mercilessly because her fake prophetess told her ive had series of abortion and I have never slept with any man all my life then. I WROTE ALL THIS TO ENCOURAGE YOU THAT YOU'RE NOT ALONE IN THIS, SOME PERSONS MIGHT BE PASSING THROUGH WORSE BUT HOLD ON TO GOD, CHANNEL ALL YOUR NEGATIVE ENERGY INTO SERVING GOD AND BEING YOURSELF. Today im in 500L and soon to be a graduate of financial management. I ENCOURAGE YOU TODAY TO BE STRONG AND REMEMBER GOD LOVES YOU. DONT EVER THINK SUICIDE BECAUSE YOU COULD USE YOUR STORY TO TRANSFORM LIVES

FriedYam:
Good evening Nlers.
I'm a eighteen year old. From a family of five. The only son with extra strict parents. A lot has been happening right from my childhood down till now and my parents are of the view that I'm an apology.

I wasn't the brightest in school. I'm above average nd particularly led my class in my core subjects. I wrote my wassce in 2014. I cleared my papers except math nd literature. Agreed. I'm a dumbo at math but literature.... All students failed because a classmate was caught with a phone. Thus, I became the first in my family to fail o'level.

I registered for neco gce nd failed even more cos there was high expo there. My jamb score was 223 that yr for an imposed course, Law.

2015,i registered neco again at a school known for expo. However, before the expo was brought into the hall, I would have answered all my questions nd was only helped in maths. They called me a textbook in the school. I had B's all through but my father thinks it was expo that helped me. At 2015 , my jamb score was 257. U.I f'd me up. Law again.

This yr, jamb did the unthinkable. After popping coffee all night to study nd reading all day to the extent that i lost weight, i had 212. Y'all know how jamb was. Now I ddnt gain admission for law.... I'm being blamed now for jambs incompetence.

A who bunch of other things relating to education where i've been gravely misunderstood are untold.

But, that's just abt education.

Jonwesley:
Why bring up a piece based on your emotions to ask such a naive question if U are a bad son. Yes, U are! And don't be carried away by ill advisedly crafted opinions of ur likes here in Nairaland. Certainly, Nairaland is full of teenagers and the young. Never talk ill of ur parents about your frustrations again. That alone make U a bad child.

Character moulding is a prime responsibility of parents. They were once in ur position and had all your current experiences, so stop the wailings. You painted a narrow picture of all that's going on there to seek for pity right? As to why U are a bad child, there's more U didn't say. The tendencies U exhibit is being prunned to avoid the mistakes ur parents had, they may not have told U. A parent wants the best for a child like U, to at least surpass their own achievements in their time. Avoid this rhetorical and cyclical innuendos that is bane of most families and take the necessary corrections. Even if U make 350 score in Jamb, there is still room for more. Stop being proud and rude. You are arrogant and egoistic to me. Look I'm a parent, and have children of ur age and so I know what I'm talking. Your sex feels is worrisome due to your early exposure, why shouldn't your parents be worry about U and treat U to avoid the trend. A teenager always think he's arrived, the same errors all of them makes. What have U said about God, ur maker. Do U know how to pray? How obedient are U to your parents, and how obedient are U to God whom U never see. I don't have all the day to write my mind here. The scraps written by ur likes here is annoying and I feel is more damaging. Try to feel ur parents and understand that they are meant to train U, a responsibility placed upon them by God. And be humble to learn and take ur time. You rush and U rush out of live. Everybody is not the same. Stop the comparisons, U are not yet in school but ur dullard mates are there, yes! Their destiny is different, face urs. Enough of bickerings and negative thoughts of suicide, hatred and so on. Haba!

Never mold your child to your expectations. You are there to guide them through life. Not to force them. There are several ways to approach this. OP can have a Law degree because a law degree can help him in his future business. And if the business does not work out, he has something to fall back on. Law is not that bad of a course to study. In fact I think it's a very good course for a future business person. You say OP sounds rude. How? I don't see the rudeness. You think 257 in JAMB is nothing abi? Lol.

justscorchone:


Why did you quote me though?

wow; I never expected the out burst. Be calm brother I quoted you to say " I agree with you." that was all.

I also went ahead to address the issue but I forgot to submit yours before I went ahead to address the issue. that made everything appear on a page.
thanks.

foody:
wow; I never expected the out burst. Be calm brother I quoted you to say " I agree with you." that was all.

I also went ahead to address the issue but I forgot to submit yours before I went ahead to address the issue. that made everything appear on a page.
thanks.

Mtchew I thought you were looking for style to toast me sef

baby124:

Never mold your child to your expectations. You are there to guide them through life. Not to force them. There are several ways to approach this. OP can have a Law degree because a law degree can help him in his future business. And if the business does not work out, he has something to fall back on. Law is not that bad of a course to study. In fact I think it's a very good course for a future business person. You say OP sounds rude. How? I don't see the rudeness. You think 257 in JAMB is nothing abi? Lol.

The same babyish talk. How old are u, if u are not like the others who have sent in comments that will not help the guy. If u notice, i was silent in the choice of Law being forced on the child by the parents. No where in my post did i mention this and I don't force any of mine. To me here is poor communication is the cause. No matter how u feel about my scoring high in Jamb, there is still more to be achieved in life than standing like a domain defender. My cents!

FriedYam:
About sex. I was introduced to sex at a very tender age. 6 precisely by one of those big aunties. Consitently abused till age nine. However, since then, I havent had sex. Maybe this is the reason why anything sexual gets me erect in a flash but I can't help it. I've tried but I get erect most times even when I'm not thinking of sex. I may lie down to sleep nd wake up erect to discover someone saw me. Or maybe I'm just chatting on phone, not anything related to sex, I'll get erect. My fam have seen me dodging this several times. They think I'm having sex. They think I'm a pervert nd think every girl is unsafe with me. Its not lack of chance that's made me not have sex, I want to, but it doesnt seem right, si i just abstained.

A female friend got me 1500# airtime on my bday last yr. Her bday came nd I decided to repay her buy buying a sandal for her.. Mum saw it nd concluded that I had a gf nd was having sex. The house has been hell for me. Dad heard nd now every single wrong I do, I get to hear about my rapist tendencies nd numerous girlfriend ion know abt.

I'm handsome, i look like dad. Very handsome so they think I'm using that to get girls.

I've been depressed severally and thought of suicide many times... A whole lot of other things have happened too which i cant say

Like when i was 12 nd was sprouting pubic hair. Ws so fascinated that i used to pull the hair evrynight to make sure it was there. Mum entered my room at night nd caught my hands in my boxer, I was doing my nightly check. She screamed, said i was masturbating. Ddnt even know what the word meant. Since then They knew me at home as a porn addict nd masturbator... i ddnt even know what they meant.

Tat's abt sex

all you need is GOD and serious prayer and you also need to go for what you timk you can do not wat yur parents want you to do

Jonwesley:


The same babyish talk. How old are u, if u are not like the others who have sent in comments that will not help the guy. If u notice, i was silent in the choice of Law being forced on the child by the parents. No where in my post did i mention this and I don't force any of mine. To me here is poor communication is the cause. No matter how u feel about my scoring high in Jamb, there is still more to be achieved in life than standing like a domain defender. My cents!

Only you is the adult and parent of the world. Mr adviser ITK. If they check now, you probably cheated to pass JAMB. But you are very good at insulting the guy that he's rude because he told us his JAMB score. I am sure you have not seen life. But huffing and puffing on this thread. Nonsense. Go and treat your children like dumb fools who must follow every thing you say without thinking for themselves and see how well they end up.

Bro, find friends... real people that can become family. These days family do worse that enemies.

FriedYam:
About sex. I was introduced to sex at a very tender age. 6 precisely by one of those big aunties. Consitently abused till age nine. However, since then, I havent had sex. Maybe this is the reason why anything sexual gets me erect in a flash but I can't help it. I've tried but I get erect most times even when I'm not thinking of sex. I may lie down to sleep nd wake up erect to discover someone saw me. Or maybe I'm just chatting on phone, not anything related to sex, I'll get erect. My fam have seen me dodging this several times. They think I'm having sex. They think I'm a pervert nd think every girl is unsafe with me. Its not lack of chance that's made me not have sex, I want to, but it doesnt seem right, si i just abstained.

A female friend got me 1500# airtime on my bday last yr. Her bday came nd I decided to repay her buy buying a sandal for her.. Mum saw it nd concluded that I had a gf nd was having sex. The house has been hell for me. Dad heard nd now every single wrong I do, I get to hear about my rapist tendencies nd numerous girlfriend ion know abt.

I'm handsome, i look like dad. Very handsome so they think I'm using that to get girls.

I've been depressed severally and thought of suicide many times... A whole lot of other things have happened too which i cant say

Like when i was 12 nd was sprouting pubic hair. Ws so fascinated that i used to pull the hair evrynight to make sure it was there. Mum entered my room at night nd caught my hands in my boxer, I was doing my nightly check. She screamed, said i was masturbating. Ddnt even know what the word meant. Since then They knew me at home as a porn addict nd masturbator... i ddnt even know what they meant.

Tat's abt sex

stop masturbating son. Its evil, it brings bad luck , it causes madness and so on...if you stop you will notice good things will start happening to you...just Dont do it for 2 - 3 weeks and see what I'm talking about if you didn't notice any good thing you can start again but I assure you my words are true.

baby124:

Only you is the adult and parent of the world. Mr adviser ITK. If they check now, you probably cheated to pass JAMB. But you are very good at insulting the guy that he's rude because he told us his JAMB score. I am sure you have not seen life. But huffing and puffing on this thread. Nonsense. Go and treat your children like dumb fools who must follow every thing you say without thinking for themselves and see how well they end up.

Oh uhhuuuu!, poor temperament, there u go again. U are the only one who can't comprehend my piece? Even the OP has not complained, reminds me of the adage:, 'a man's neighbour said he cannot sleep because of the man that told him, he had lumbago'. It's only a sided talk u remain.

Go and take a comprehension class please. Or FriedYam follow Baby124 only since she does not want any other opinion that can help u.

Jeeeeeeeezzz!!!!.....did you read wot he wrote??
He was just feeling his sprouting pubic hair when his mama saw him....
So to his mom...
Hands in Boxer shorts = masturbation

I think you need to sit them down and talk to them. Be as mature yet respectful as you can be. Let them know they are wrong in judgement and they should be your friends and confidants not otherwise. Afterall, they are your parents.

I can so relate to you you I had very strict disciplinarian as parents too. So just prove them wrong. Tell them and show them.