Smh... Most of these persons commenting do not even understand what introversion means.

Ginaz you aren't TOO introverted, you are too reserved. I could explain the difference if you want. You can't change your introversion, but how reserved you are depends on you. You don't think anyone could understand you because you don't give them a chance to.

Never mind the suggestions to go to parties or clubs. If you force it, you'd get drained faster than you can make a new friend there.

Introvert or extrovert, we all have a social need, just that introversion makes one alot more selective. There's a thread for introverts somewhere. You'd be surprised how many persons are like you in many ways. I'd mention you there.

Richiy:


Yes, you will like it

Some friends of mine are gathering and we gonna have fun this weekend. Pure fun o. No hanky panky. We are good girls.

I will personally be there for you so you don't feel overwhelmed

Thanks, I don't think I can have the courage for travelling. You stay @ lag?

Oahray:
Smh... Most of these persons commenting do not even understand what introversion means.

Ginaz you aren't TOO introverted, you are too reserved. I could explain the difference if you want. You can't change your introversion, but how reserved you are depends on you. You don't think anyone could understand you because you don't give them a chance to.

Never mind the suggestions to go to parties or clubs. If you force it, you'd get drained faster than you can make a new friend there.

Introvert or extrovert, we all have a social need, just that introversion makes one alot more selective. There's a thread for introverts somewhere. You'd be surprised how many persons are like you in many ways. I'd mention you there.

Thanks so much

Thanks so much for the contributed comments, now I know nairaland is truly an online family. I'm grateful and lost of words for the kind advice I have gotten.

Today I went outside to weed the compound, had small conversations with my neighbors(it was hard) and slept all through the morning, just waking up now and logging in to nairaland and I saw those that gave me mentions.

Thanks a lot, I appreciate. One step at a time and i'll learn to associate myself with people.

Ginaz:


Thanks, I don't think I can have the courage for travelling. You stay @ lag?

We are at lag tho

Winnelyn:
you are exactly like me.. but I think I love myself this way

issokay kwantinue being like dat 5yrs from now u blame d witches in ur village fr being single


u fine fine anyhow and u still dey introvert urself my dear kneel down lemme pray fr u.u need d touch of God if not tins sooner won't be fun

fayluv1:
Thank God o, and i taught am d only one dat behave dis way

see stop consoling ur self with dat idea,she is complaining about it and u are thanking God,u guys shud mingle a lot stop deceiving urself abt dis introvert thing its a bad behavior pple dnt understand it with you and bottom line pple mouth dey follow person and dats why it is nt advice able to be an introvert see make friends hang out share ideas live life to d fullest and be happy with pple

[quote author=askibee post=51087448]


see stop consoling ur self with dat idea,she is complaining about it and u are thanking God,u guys shud mingle a lot stop deceiving urself abt dis introvert thing its a bad behavior pple dnt understand it with you and bottom line pple mouth dey follow person and dats why it is nt advice able to be an introvert see make friends hang out share ideas live life to d fullest and be happy with pple[/quote who says am not living my life to d fullest? U find more fulfilment being alone dan having fake friends surrounding u

[quote author=fayluv1 post=51094089][/quote]


fake friends? is dat wat u tagged everybody cos someone disappointed u?


ma dear fingers ain't equal there gud pple out there dos u need and dos dat need u, a tree don't mak a forest, being alone saves u from a lot I agree but we need pple around us either we like it or not


hw do u learn from gud and bad? hw do u learn how to cherish good tons and despise bad tins? pple teach you all dis tin

Ginaz:
I don't know the right section to post this but I really need to know cos I'm tired already so forgive me.

I'm in my early twenties, I'm the kind of girl that just love being alone with herself. I don't go clubbing, don't go to parties( except I don't have a choice and I'm being forced by my mother, marriage tinx)

I have few friends, just 4 I share deep emotional matters with. I'm always alone when at home, in fact I get excited about it.

I have never visited anyone this year, except on 2 occasions. Only 2 have visited me also, I close from work straight home and sleep, read novels or watch movie.

I like social stuff but too much of it kills me, makes me shy and tired. Now I'm at my aunt's house, I've been inside my room since Saturday, I only come out to do house chores. This is my personality but I feel people don't understand.

My aunt just had a talk with me right now that I keep myself from people, and it's getting me mad cos I didn't think it that way.

Nairalanders, please am I too introverted or what? Is there something I'm missing? Please.

yeap It a bad tin,am once like u I stay Indoor,am d shy type cos for me to greet it a big deal,I will rather pass were ppl will nt c me,I dnt knw hw to start conversation dan my life is so miserable, to d glory of God I work on my self I started building my confident jst by say hi I Neva wait to hear their reply bt my own is just to build my confident,I start try to come out in d church to gv testimony though Dan I will be sheaving why my voice will b shake as if all d ppl in d church wanted to bite me,Idnt miss any Sunday wit out giving testimony nt DAT am gud talker BT I wnt to brake d bond holding me down,BT c me nw I can talk anywere witout shaking my dear it gud to socialise u will b happy wit ur self y ppl will b happy wit u too I Neva miss anytin wat I only miss is all d opportunity I miss been introvert, I could remember Dan wen I was in jss1 I surpport to b d class captain cos am very brilliant, BT am unable cos I dnt relate wit ppl I leave 70% of my life only no friend notin,my advise is u are totally leaving in another word even in dsame word cos am been there b4 com to other side of d word socialise make good friend be happy wit urself,love good part of urself ,be happy wit wat u are doing,cr8t good sense of humour,u will c life is more Dan staying indoor shalom

Ginaz:


I'm very quiet to some extent, people take advantage of it a lot. I don't know how to make them understand this is how I am.

You and me both.

You even have 4 friends. Lmao. That means you're four steps ahead of me in the social department level then. I gat none.

You dont need to make anybody understand anything, especially "friends". If they aren't cool with it, let them take a walk.

The only thing you need is to accept yourself the way you are and realize that only very emotionally and pschologically strong people can be by themselves without needing the company of another.

Be who you are, not who someone else wants you to be.

youngfocus:


yeap It a bad tin,am once like u I stay Indoor,am d shy type cos for me to greet it a big deal,I will rather pass were ppl will nt c me,I dnt knw hw to start conversation dan my life is so miserable, to d glory of God I work on my self I started building my confident jst by say hi I Neva wait to hear their reply bt my own is just to build my confident,I start try to come out in d church to gv testimony though Dan I will be sheaving why my voice will b shake as if all d ppl in d church wanted to bite me,Idnt miss any Sunday wit out giving testimony nt DAT am gud talker BT I wnt to brake d bond holding me down,BT c me nw I can talk anywere witout shaking my dear it gud to socialise u will b happy wit ur self y ppl will b happy wit u too I Neva miss anytin wat I only miss is all d opportunity I miss been introvert, I could remember Dan wen I was in jss1 I surpport to b d class captain cos am very brilliant, BT am unable cos I dnt relate wit ppl I leave 70% of my life only no friend notin,my advise is u are totally leaving in another word even in dsame word cos am been there b4 com to other side of d word socialise make good friend be happy wit urself,love good part of urself ,be happy wit wat u are doing,cr8t good sense of humour,u will c life is more Dan staying indoor shalom

What you described sounds like social anxiety disorder not introversion. I hope you know that there are shy extroverts. They badly want to be with people, and want to socialize, but are afraid they would mess it up or be rejected. The result is total dissatisfaction with their lives.

Introversion is not a lack of confidence. Shyness is. Many times they overlap but aren't the same thing.

I'm introverted, but a better public speaker than most extroverts I know.

@op your own is good Na, u live with people
I live alone,girl its one of those things.
Am used to it.love been in doors and alone.
you are not alone....
it's a stage in one's life.enjoy it!

Oahray:
What you described sounds like social anxiety disorder not introversion. I hope you know that there are shy extroverts. They badly want to be with people, and want to socialize, but are afraid they would mess it up or be rejected. The result is total dissatisfaction with their lives.

Introversion is not a lack of confidence. Shyness is. Many times they overlap but aren't the same thing.

I'm introverted, but a better public speaker than most extroverts I know.

anyway wat I knw is been socialise is gud even to ur health cos u will laugh wit other relax ur nerve,though sumtime I still prefer doing my tins only sha,it jst dat am happy wit myself nw I knw hw to interact wit ppl on like b4 dat I avoid ppl like plague,shalom

Ginaz:


My dear, people tend to take us like an outcast cos we live inside our head everyday. I feel out of place in a gathering and I find it very hard to express myself. Going out of my house is like war, I so much enjoy my company that when someone calls to tell me they want to visit me I lie or make excuses I'm not at home. Or if they come sef, I will be praying they go quickly.

They take advantage of it a lot, everybody knows I will be at home so all the errands are on my head. I just feel angry when my family doesn't understand I like being alone, I don't have to be in your gathering to have fun. I have fun in my head. They look me like I'm not mentally OK, which gets me very mad and more indoors. I didn't go to my cousins marriage, lol. I told them to leave me aloneeee.

I love my novels, my sleep, my space, my head. If I get married one day how do I cope?

It's quite amazing to see my personality in you and your write up. Waoh! This is my life and people think it's not normal. I love it but sometimes, i feel bored with friends company... I don't even keep friends this day

However, if i feel comfortable with someone, i tend to play a lot with the person. It could be a new or old friend...

I spend my free time writing or reading..

Ginaz:
I don't know the right section to post this but I really need to know cos I'm tired already so forgive me.

I'm in my early twenties, I'm the kind of girl that just love being alone with herself. I don't go clubbing, don't go to parties( except I don't have a choice and I'm being forced by my mother, marriage tinx)

I have few friends, just 4 I share deep emotional matters with. I'm always alone when at home, in fact I get excited about it.

I have never visited anyone this year, except on 2 occasions. Only 2 have visited me also, I close from work straight home and sleep, read novels or watch movie.

I like social stuff but too much of it kills me, makes me shy and tired. Now I'm at my aunt's house, I've been inside my room since Saturday, I only come out to do house chores. This is my personality but I feel people don't understand.

My aunt just had a talk with me right now that I keep myself from people, and it's getting me mad cos I didn't think it that way.

Nairalanders, please am I too introverted or what? Is there something I'm missing? Please.

I know that feeling. But I never would have guessed you were introverted. No man is an island, you need to relate with people. I'm an introvert myself but I still have lots of friends. What are you reading these days anyways?

find someone that is has this same thing in common with you and have a face to face discussion about it

@Ginaz I know the solution to your problem PM me I don't want others getting it for free

Ginaz:
I don't know the right section to post this but I really need to know cos I'm tired already so forgive me.

I'm in my early twenties, I'm the kind of girl that just love being alone with herself. I don't go clubbing, don't go to parties( except I don't have a choice and I'm being forced by my mother, marriage tinx)

I have few friends, just 4 I share deep emotional matters with. I'm always alone when at home, in fact I get excited about it.

I have never visited anyone this year, except on 2 occasions. Only 2 have visited me also, I close from work straight home and sleep, read novels or watch movie.

I like social stuff but too much of it kills me, makes me shy and tired. Now I'm at my aunt's house, I've been inside my room since Saturday, I only come out to do house chores. This is my personality but I feel people don't understand.

My aunt just had a talk with me right now that I keep myself from people, and it's getting me mad cos I didn't think it that way.

Nairalanders, please am I too introverted or what? Is there something I'm missing? Please.

I must commend your innocent looks and pretty face. (Crushing .. lol)

This book should help you better understand yourself. 'Why You Act the Way You Do' by Tim F LaHaye.. You learn alot there about the different temperaments, blends, and how to maximise the gains peculiar to your temperament. A small read, not more than 500naira or you could download online. Regards

Houstency:


This book should help you better understand yourself. 'Why You Act the Way You Do' by Tim F LaHaye.. You learn alot there about the different temperaments, blends, and how to maximise the gains peculiar to your temperament. A small read, not more than 500naira or you could download online. Regards

Thanks, I will try to get it online.

Ginaz:


Worst part is I don't know how to loose myself. right now as I'm typing, I'm excluded in the parlour while my aunties are in the dinning room all chatting. Being alone is like a drug to me.

Damn u fine die...be mine and u will hate been alone

Ginaz, calling for help is uncalled for, there's absolutely nothing wrong being an introvert. At least, I'm one.

Possible reasons

1.You are either an only child or last child

2.You have been through a heartbreak that robbed you of social disposition

3. You need someone that really understands you.


I can't do anything about 1 & 2, but what you want is a solution to number 3. I currently run an experiment to match people whose social inclinations are identical, I find that people in your category(introverts) are a lot more social with other people who share similar traits as its easier to come out of your shell when not threatened with the overactivity of extroverted people. PM if you would like to take part in the experiment. Cheers.

Splinz:
Ginaz, calling for help is uncalled for, there's absolutely nothing wrong being an introvert. At least, I'm one.

I felt something is wrong with me, I feel so excluded from everything around me. I care less about having fun or which latest fun is in town. Though sometimes I wished I could join in but I always very void, like I'm in a crowd yet feel alone. But if I should go out with someone to a really peaceful place, just both of us there I feel free.

Right this festive season, people are planning where to go, what do do, places and all that. Here I am not having a care, possible gonna stay indoors like I did last year and the one after that. Only place I went was a friend's house and it is cos of my birthday.

Ginaz:


I felt something is wrong with me, I feel so excluded from everything around me. I care less about having fun or which latest fun is in town. Though sometimes I wished I could join in but I always very void, like I'm in a crowd yet feel alone. But if I should go out with someone to a really peaceful place, just both of us there I feel free.

Right this festive season, people are planning where to go, what do do, places and all that. Here I am not having a care, possible gonna stay indoors like I did last year and the one after that. Only place I went was a friend's house and it is cos of my birthday.

C'mon... these things are not known to you alone! I mean we can't all be the outgoing types, there must be some reserved.

What if I tell you that I care less too about stuffs like fun, Christmas, new year etc? Yes! This doesn't in anyway makes me a lesser human. Of course I do rejoice with the celebrants and wished them well, though I don't take part in their activities. The thing is, I'm simply not interested! Perhaps, it's because I have my mind sets on other things I consider more important.

So again I repeat, there's nothing wrong with you! But then, there must be something that interest you, just like me.

Ginaz:


I felt something is wrong with me, I feel so excluded from everything around me. I care less about having fun or which latest fun is in town. Though sometimes I wished I could join in but I always very void, like I'm in a crowd yet feel alone. But if I should go out with someone to a really peaceful place, just both of us there I feel free.

Right this festive season, people are planning where to go, what do do, places and all that. Here I am not having a care, possible gonna stay indoors like I did last year and the one after that. Only place I went was a friend's house and it is cos of my birthday.

first and fore most I must complement your beauty. you look sexy too. thats a big advantage you posses which means you are very likely to attract friends from both genders.

I am quoting you because haven read through various comments, and your reactions I guessed you really want a new you.

It all boils down to your happiness. if you are depressed from your lifestyle then you must consciously and actively start doing something about it. Remember CONSCIOUSLY AND ACTIVELY.

I assume you are really ready to take some few active steps like a lot of commenters have suggested. but I want to add one very simple and helpful way out.

get a new Hobby. An outdoor hobby. that is if you want to meet more people without the fear of getting to personal.

Take up tennis, football, golf, etc thats in sport.

If you are member of a church, take up a voluntary service or get involved more in the activities. like ushering, choir etc. if you are already a member take a up a leadership role therefore more responsibility.

if you do one or two of the above, you will be so occupied you won't have time for yourself again.

wish you all the best.

joycesims:



:d I'm the same I think, staying home alone gets me excited most of the time

when I was working, I get home straight, do chores,novels or movies/internet then bedtime

I love watching movies alone, I don't watch TV with family cos they are probably watching sports, zee world/telemundo...ewwww

My mum complains but I can't help it

I have just 1 friend now, lol
and I'm also the only daughter, hmm...

I dunno I'm not really bothered tho family members wouldn't let one be...

is it OK, I dunno, but I'm not unhappy, I mean who unhappiness epp

getting to know you would be a lovely experience!

gsainttrinity thanks for your advise, I'm into sport but guys won't let someone jug in peace so I stopped

Let's say I love novels, novels are the only thing I would go extra mile to get.

metallisc:



getting to know you would be a lovely experience!

I think so too!

If u find yourself too boring, probably you need to loosen up a bit, make friend it someone who's outgoing, u can find a hobby or keep a relationship. Just hang out sometimes with the people who appreciate u, just keep ur mind busy. I'm also an introvert n I don't regret it tho, I find parties boring Bt I'm kool just that am a bit emotional Bt I read a lot n watch movies

If u find yourself too boring, probably you need to loosen up a bit, make friend with someone who's outgoing, u can find a hobby or keep a relationship. Just hang out sometimes with the people who appreciate u, just keep ur mind busy. I'm also an introvert n I don't regret it tho, I find parties boring Bt I'm kool just that am a bit emotional Bt I read a lot n watch movies

Ginaz:
gsainttrinity thanks for your advise, I'm into sport but guys won't let someone jug in peace so I stopped

Let's say I love novels, novels are the only thing I would go extra mile to get.

Miss Gina, this issue about boys and flirting is something that girls should not over react to, especially One like you who needs as much people around to boost your level of happiness.

I have to speak from my point of view, as a young man, I personally can not bring myself to ignore a woman's physical attributes while wanting to just strike up platonic friendship.

for me, the search for platonic friendships is strictly restricted to guys Alone... and that would be guys who share one or two activities together with me. so this leaves me naturally flirting with women at first meet or subsequent meets.

But I am saying on behalf of myself and many other guys like me, these flirting gestures are mainly harmless.

I have had many female friends whom I had hit at who were able to manage these flirty behavior and this is where girls who have many male friends and company succeed. they are not intimidated by guys flirty behaviour they take advantage of the advantage to show the guys the other side of their personalities which is beyond the looks and believe me, guys respect girls who can prove a things or two with or without good looks.

the reason for this long story is go out, Jog or pursue whatever sport you love to do. guys will always hit at you but it is left to you to show them that you can beat them at their own game.

challenge them in the sport of your prefrence, practice, be good at it. challenge them
show them who you are apart from having a beautiful face.

enjoy the game.... don't be intimidated by male advances....... at all..... in fact I dislike girls who cower at every guys advances. take it as fun and as challenge.