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50 Rules All Women Must No About Men - Romance - Nairaland

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50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by shakara4u(m): 11:12pm On Nov 07, 2009
1. If you think you are FAT, you probably are. Do not ask us. We refuse to answer.

2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

3. Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then, you are stuck with her.

4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!

5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to; expect an answer you do not want to hear.

6. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

7. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Soccer, the shotgun formation and Formula 1.

8. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

9. Shopping is not a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that way.

10. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

11. Crying is blackmail.

12. Your ex-boyfriend is an IDIOT.

13. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!

14. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

15. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

16. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

17. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

18. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

19. Check your oil. Please.

20. Do not fake it. We would rather be ineffective than deceived.

21. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

22. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

23. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

24. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

25. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

26. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

27. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends like THEIR relationship is SO MUCH better.

28. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings. Peach, for example, peach is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

29. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

30. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

31. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

32. Sex is always a great birthday gift.

33. Bedtime means "go to sleep", not "ask me stupid questions."

34. Admitting we are wrong also counts as "I'm sorry."

35. We hang out with our boys because we need time away from you.

36. Don't give us rules.

37. It's not gonna suck itself.

38. When finished, it is best to roll over and go to sleep.

39. Lingerie is GOOD.

40. NEVER ask to drive my car.

41. Polygamy is in the Bible so a man is allowed to keep more than one woman.

42. It doesn't matter where I was, does it?

43. Yes, peeing while standing up is more difficult. We are bound to miss sometimes.

44. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz together.

45. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

46. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.

47. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

48. If it is OUR house, I do not understand why MY stuff gets thrown in the closet/attic/basement.

49. We are not mind readers and we never will be.Our lack of mind-reading ability is not
proof of how little we care about you.

50. If we hear from an old girlfriend, we will briefly
fantasize about having sex with her. But do not worry;
the fantasy includes you AND her, together.
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by sistajay(f): 11:19pm On Nov 07, 2009
Men, its always my way or the Highway! I give you two finger salute!!!
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by OAM4J: 1:05am On Nov 08, 2009
What can I say to this

Some true, some not, some stupid, no am not sure undecided
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by shakara4u(m): 1:49am On Nov 08, 2009
which # is stupid?
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by FierceDiva: 8:23am On Nov 08, 2009
men have humongous Egos!
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by mrgyang: 8:40am On Nov 08, 2009
#50 is my favorite- it means Rihanna shouldn't have bothered Chris when she saw the text message on his phone,
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by mrgyang: 8:42am On Nov 08, 2009
#51. Whatever you see whlie going through our stuffs, Live with it!
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by madlady(f): 10:55am On Nov 08, 2009
@Poster, Number 3, is that really true?
Number 19, do you mean car oil? undecided
Number 25, better still, walk in front of TV naked. tongue
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by debest1(m): 11:01am On Nov 08, 2009
oh not again all this men vs women posts again! angry
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by mrgyang: 2:06pm On Nov 08, 2009
[b][/b]@ madly,
#3:yep its very tru,check out most married women
i guez the oil its fluid(ope u get?)
wlk naked,that will b cool
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by Radiant(f): 3:23pm On Nov 08, 2009
I need to create my own rules for all men! This is CRAP! kiss
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by kay9(m): 3:36pm On Nov 08, 2009
madlady:

Number 25, better still, walk in front of TV naked. tongue

We just might, so don't push it! grin grin
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by madlady(f): 6:04pm On Nov 08, 2009
grin grin grin grin


Pushing.
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by kay9(m): 4:43am On Nov 09, 2009
madlady:

grin grin grin grin


Pushing.

grin grin Women! The very thing i asked you NOT to do!
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by SeanT21(f): 5:30am On Nov 09, 2009
LMAO@#3. I plan on cutting mine soon oo.

@@#43, at-least wipe the toilet seat
.
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by victorazy(m): 9:05am On Nov 09, 2009
dont ask for recharch card, i know what am doing. a real man know what a woman want.
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by Qlu(m): 10:58am On Nov 09, 2009
And When u see ur man doin ur mama doggie in tha bathroom with the door open'd,u can take a peep,shut ur mouth,close the door and walk away for a silent cry cas he'd remember to pay u the same respect and do you doggie like he done ur mama, Don't Stress it!!!!!
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by shakara4u(m): 11:11am On Nov 09, 2009
@radiant,no one stops u from makin rules for men.but for now try this out with ur man n u will c how smooth tins will wrk out. lol
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by noblegas2(m): 2:42pm On Nov 09, 2009
victorazy:

dont ask for recharge card, i know what am doing. a real man know what a woman want.

Seconded!!!  cheesy cheesy grin grin
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by Nobody: 7:47pm On Nov 09, 2009
dont ask for recharge card, i know what am doing. a real man know what a woman want.
Seconded!!!


thirded grin
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by lexandra(f): 10:32am On Nov 10, 2009
34. Admitting we are wrong also counts as "I'm sorry."
JUST SAY IT, lollll
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by oiseworld: 11:31am On Nov 10, 2009
true talk

10 gunshots 4 u.
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by sweetliet: 11:45am On Nov 10, 2009
what a lie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Re: 50 Rules All Women Must No About Men by whitelexi(m): 11:46am On Nov 10, 2009
#50 was repeated though

I love 6,7,8,9,10 grin

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