I'm A female, obviously.. A graduate of medicine in one of the Universities of West, Nigeria. I earn a good salary as a medical practioner and I actually earn more than my husband. Who's also a graduate of my school, mass communication.

He gets a good Pay too. But not as good as mine. Actually, I earn two times his salary. but my husband has been On my neck, Asking that I stop working and take care of the kids. We have been Blessed with kids of age 6 And 3. I once asked that he could quit his' and TakeCare of the kids, since in earn higher., I provide financially.. But my baby, doesn't want any of that. I guess his ego won't let him.

I love him to bits, but I feel like our family can't survive on just his salary. What do you think I should do, please? Should I quit my job? Or should I keep pestering him to see things my way? Help me please. I'm confused.

Cc: mynd44 lalasticlala

Dear OP,

Asking your hubby to quit his job and become a 'house husband'? I don't think any man would accept that.

And you can't afford to quit your job because you actually earn more than he does.

Why not get a nanny for your kids?

You mean your husband should be a full-house-husband

See your fellow doctors, you need brain test ASAP

Why should a man quit his job even if he earns peanuts?.

Madam you two could retain your jobs by getting a good nanny to take care of the kids, is not like you go away for weeks.

Is this even a question?

From where I stand...I think, it's disrespectful to ask your husband to resign just because you earn more than him. The man is the head of the family that position commands respect in every aspect.

If you ask me, I don't see any reason why you should resign. All you need to do is to enroll the 3 year old in a day care then get a househelp that will be at home to receive them whenever they're back from school...at this stage school bus is very necessary. I believe this will take care of the problem.


A mother's role can never be filled by anyone except her. There is bond between kids and their mums, that even their fathers can't never understand. If he's insisting I think, you should resign and take care of the kids even though it doesn't make sense. No woman should stay at home for any reason whatsoever.

yorhmienerd:
You mean your husband should be a full-house-husband

See your fellow doctors, you need brain test ASAP

rude.


Please, do not insult me. Pass your points across without being rude in the process.

BOTH OF YOU SHOULDN'T QUIT UR JOBS COS IT WILL EVENTUALLY TELL ON THE FAMILY IF YOU CAN EMPLOY A HOUSE MAID IT WILL BE BETTER

Everything is not money, my sis is a pharm. but have to quite for the sake of her children, though the husband is not doing a high paying job.

Taking care of your children and creating that strong bond should be more than money.

As a medical doc, you can do less busier work that will allow you support your family rather than asking your husband to quite his work because no man will.

A lot of people here have offered you the best advice you do need. Read through and ponder on it, however pestering will only make matters worse. I do pray in the end you make the right call.

How can you tell a full grown man to quit his job and take care of the kids... What DA fuq is wrong with you ladies of this generation... Don't let your dad hear this else he will curse you

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pasqal09:
Dear OP,

Asking your hubby to quit his job and become a 'house husband'? I don't think any man would accept that.

And you can't afford to quit your job because you actually earn more than he does.

Why not get a nanny for your kids?

Abeg bros speak for yourself o... Me I go accept am with great pleasure o.

Jeez! I go just wake in the morning and play ps4 online till evening. I go watch all the latest movies in town.

Abeg wetin I go do again?

Bring ya ear closer make I whisper something into ya big ear: "He (no be me o) go dey change babes like wrapper everyday since he no dey busy " O boy see flexing

Do you think lady doctors in the US and Uk are quitting their jobs because their husband asked them to do it? Most of their husbands would not be foolish to do so. Do the needful and employ a family member or professional to help with your household duties.

why your husband will not agree to quit his job::
it is more of a responsibility for him to tend to the house needs (which I agree with) ...

As the head of the family it's morally wrong for him to sit at home while the wife fends for him (I believe you should rather support yourself than one quitting for the other )

He probably thinks that issue of arrogance from the wife to the husband will set in sooner or later (I totally agree with this)

WHY I WON'T SUPPORT YOU QUITTING YOUR JOB::
since your husband is not earning as much as you, I believe that there is a need for support from you (one of the essence of being husband and wife)

intact, there are lots to say because this is a vital issue that can set rifts in marriages...

so, my advice to you is to seek the counsel of "much older female medical practitioner" with successful married life... I think they will be able to offer better solution suggestions

Since you earn more why not convince your husband to let you help him with some sizeable cash so he can start a buisness of his own.With him being a buisness owner he can set his own time and be more available to help monitor the kids...

That can only happen in Western Countries like USA where they called it stay at home Dad, but the case is different among my lovely Naija brothers where it's considered a first class insult, so it's better if you can get a very trusted nanny.

Both of you shld just divorce each other.

It is stupid to ask the wife to resign. In fact, I would curse any of my sister's who try that. It is fair for the wife to ask the husband to resign too. We are sure it won't happen, anyways.

So, both of you, go separate, abeg..

1 st of all this is one of the reasons why I don't want to marry a doctor, nurse or any force lady. There jobs are demanding. I am not saying that earning well is bad. But when I went into the marriage, I did so for so many reasons which having kids and earning some cool cash is amongst the least.









As for op, I understand ur plight, the nature of ur job here, I know ur hands are tied, however, I wouldn't suggest u resign , but I will suggest a kinda business which will allow him more time for the family. As an African man, there are certain things he can't compromise. He might know how to cook but please make sure u do. 2ndly, there is no way a right thinking man will sit home and be jobless, lie lie, it might sound easy and sweet to u now, but soon u will start reminding him of how wasteful he is if he request for money to send to his distressed relation or even how he is wasting ur sweat ( I know I will say u can't do such, forget am, na human all of us be, @ times our brains go touch) and trust me, ur husband will never take it as Brain skoi skoi, he will take it as an insult as a man. And na that time real marriage issues go start. It will be a thing of war thing, on his side he will want to be justified for being the head of the family on ur part, u would also want to be justified as the provider( them no de get 2 captains for the same ship oh).



If u think it is as easy as u think and being that ur family needs the money u make. Please once u get ur salary, divide it into 5 , take 1 part and give the rest to him to manage the home with, if by can do it without asking questions as to how some of it were spent, den u can give this ur " he should resign thing " a thought, otherwise just beg him to get a job that demands less of his time,



Trust me! Every man wants to be earning something , no matter how small it is, that is one of the things that made us men. That sense of providing . Remove that from a man then u have stripped him off that respect.





Forget this ur initial gra gra. U ma go soon insult him tire as per jobless man. No be women again?






If ur husband is an Igbo man, then be prepared to wave bye bye for una marriage, because him no go ever compromise.

you mean your husband (head of the family) should quit his job? like seriously? Abomination

Its not proper to request a husband quit his job and become a baby sitter. Haba! Rather its better you help him find something to increase his income...
You can ask him to try this and he will never be poor again. Just go here http: // bit. do/ makeprofits4life
Close all the spaces to check the site

ikp120:


Abeg bros speak for yourself o... Me I go accept am with great pleasure o.

Jeez! I go just wake in the morning and play ps4 online till evening. I go watch all the latest movies in town.

Abeg wetin I go do again?

Bring ya ear closer make I whisper something into ya big ear: "He (no be me o) go dey change babes like wrapper everyday since he no dey busy " O boy see flexing

How old are u?

i would advice that you go for the Nanny option... the family needs to come to this agreement

Everblazinggg:



How old are u?

How old are you not to know that perspectives vary from person to person?
Kid grow up and learn to learn to learn to learn to learn that not everyone sees things the way you see them.

Say something about what's up and go ya way mehn. That is commonsensical. Kid next time, please kindly consult my profile, do your private research about me, and always understand the fact that people are different. There are more people in this world than you've ever met and would ever meet.

What kinda kid is this mehn? It is just like asking a random guy: "How old is your mother?" or "How old is your girlfriend?" or "how big is your dick?" or "How wide is your pussy?" WTF! Those kinda questions should not be asked when unsolicited because they God damn silly mehn!

Kid life is all about learning. This morning, I hope you have learnt that being educated cannot be juxtaposed with going to school, but learning the basics of life, which include the fact that perspectives vary.

Thank you for attending my morning lecture! If you have any more questions, please kindly send me a PM.

#MorningLectures

pasqal09:
Dear OP,

Asking your hubby to quit his job and become a 'house husband'? I don't think any man would accept that.

And you can't afford to quit your job because you actually earn more than he does.

Why not get a nanny for your kids?

Best answer. But be careful with nannies. I know someone that out of desperation place her own mother on salary to take care of her kids. The only down side is that she can't talk to her any hw but her kids are well taken care of.

Find a way to make him understand the need for you to keep your job but if he insists, then never mind him. DON'T QUIT YOUR JOB!

Besides, don't ever compel him to quit his job, the both of you will regret it.

This is the kind of thread feminists love. haha