VERY LONG. A close friend needs urgent advice.
During my secondary school days, i had a very close friend, we lost contact for like 10yrs and reunited 3years ago at NYSC camp in the East, and became practically inseperable since then.
Through a series of coincidence, she got in contact with a friend of ours during our senior secondary days who happens to be a guy. After communicating on phone, the three of us decided to hook up but i was surprised when he called me out of the blue a day to our hook up, unexpectedly showed up at my place and we went out. After the whole 'its been a long time' greeting, he confessed that he had a serious crush on my friend since senior secondary days. Thing is, when we were in school, everyone and their mother knew that the two of them were seriously crushing on each other and they were the only ones blind to this fact.
We talked but i noticed he was asking for details about my friend and i answered him to the best of my knowledge.
The next day, i just decided not to go for the meet thereby leaving the two of them. She came back ecstatic and really happy to have spent time with him and that was that.
Now, two weeks ago the three of us were supposed to meet again but he called and begged me not to show up, i then made an excuse and didn't show up. Later in the evening, when he drove my friend to my place, i observed that she had a dazed look on her face and she was so out of it, i asked him what he did to my friend and he just laughed told me to ask her and drove off.
When my friend was able to reply, she told me he proposed marriage to her and i was like What The Eff? I actually thought it was a frigging joke until she brought out the ring he gave her, i was just screaming (my mum thought something had gone wrong) like who does that? Who proposes after just two dates I really cannot wrap my head around such happening!
The seriously baffling thing is that she is in a relationship (although long distanced) with another former juniour secondary school classmate who she got in contact with 3yrs ago through me (via fb), the funny thing is that this guy also confessed that he had a crush on her during JSS.
Now, she is parking everything on my head that i should advice her. I have been giving her the follow-your-heart advice but she insists i help her out.
Now these are my questions
1. Is it normal for a guy to propose like this (i'm perplexed as i'v never come across such)
2. What advice should i render cos i don't want wahala for myself in the future.

SO WHAT ABOUT YOU.... or are you immune to secondary school crush?

anyway RUN!!!! never get into such situations else your own will be the worst. SHE HAS A GUY and on what loose grounds did she accept another guy's RING when she has not broken up with the guy she is dating even if it is long distance. THIS IS A CRAZY WORLD INDEED....

Has LIFE not taught you that ANYTHING RUSHED has secrets that are hushed?

DESPERATION IS NEVER WISDOM. But do not let it come from you. MAYBE your mum should tell her that. I PITY THE OTHER DUDE THO he thinks his girl is faithful BUT she is already on the market. I HATE UNSTABLE UNCOMMITTED PEEPS.... hopefully he will console himself and propose to you.

Bubblefairy:
VERY LONG. A close friend needs urgent advice.
During my secondary school days, i had a very close friend, we lost contact for like 10yrs and reunited 3years ago at NYSC camp in the East, and became practically inseperable since then.
Through a series of coincidence, she got in contact with a friend of ours during our senior secondary days who happens to be a guy. After communicating on phone, the three of us decided to hook up but i was surprised when he called me out of the blue a day to our hook up, unexpectedly showed up at my place and we went out. After the whole 'its been a long time' greeting, he confessed that he had a serious crush on my friend since senior secondary days. Thing is, when we were in school, everyone and their mother knew that the two of them were seriously crushing on each other and they were the only ones blind to this fact.
We talked but i noticed he was asking for details about my friend and i answered him to the best of my knowledge.
The next day, i just decided not to go for the meet thereby leaving the two of them. She came back ecstatic and really happy to have spent time with him and that was that.
Now, two weeks ago the three of us were supposed to meet again but he called and begged me not to show up, i then made an excuse and didn't show up. Later in the evening, when he drove my friend to my place, i observed that she had a dazed look on her face and she was so out of it, i asked him what he did to my friend and he just laughed told me to ask her and drove off.
When my friend was able to reply, she told me he proposed marriage to her and i was like What The Eff? I actually thought it was a frigging joke until she brought out the ring he gave her, i was just screaming (my mum thought something had gone wrong) like who does that? Who proposes after just two dates I really cannot wrap my head around such happening!
The seriously baffling thing is that she is in a relationship (although long distanced) with another former juniour secondary school classmate who she got in contact with 3yrs ago through me (via fb), the funny thing is that this guy also confessed that he had a crush on her during JSS.
Now, she is parking everything on my head that i should advice her. I have been giving her the follow-your-heart advice but she insists i help her out.
Now these are my questions
1. Is it normal for a guy to propose like this (i'm perplexed as i'v never come across such)
2. What advice should i render cos i don't want wahala for myself in the future.

there is nothing wrong with a guy proposing that quick to a gal, since they knew each other while they were kids...

but on her side, let her take her time to study the man first before saying yes to him. 10yrs no be small time o...... people could change within that time frame!

greatnaija01:
SO WHAT ABOUT YOU.... or are you immune to secondary school crush?

anyway RUN!!!! never get into such situations else your own will be the worst. SHE HAS A GUY and on what loose grounds did she accept another guy's RING when she has not broken up with the guy she is dating even if it is long distance. THIS IS A CRAZY WORLD INDEED....

Has LIFE not taught you that ANYTHING RUSHED has secrets that are hushed?

DESPERATION IS NEVER WISDOM. But do not let it come from you. MAYBE your mum should tell her that. I PITY THE OTHER DUDE THO he thinks his girl is faithful BUT she is already on the market. I HATE UNSTABLE UNCOMMITTED PEEPS.... hopefully he will console himself and propose to you.

Thanks a lot for this, i really wanted to avoid giving her advice cos i fear people, when the shit hits the fan now, it is my name they will start calling, unfortunately she dosen't have any1 to advice her, she's an orphan, she grew up with her aunt and was severely maltreated, her only brother now takes responsibility of her.
My mum chastised her for accepting the ring (she never accepted his proposal) and all she could say was that she was confused and didn't know what to do, apparently, the proposer insisted she keep the ring whether she accepted or not (truth be told, she has been trying to avoid him).
Regarding the last part about being a consolation prize, nahhh, not interested.

This one is strong. Anyway, she should take her time, in fact all the time she wants in this world and weigh her options. If she allows herself to be stampeded, she might end up regretting it.

Ab025:
there is nothing wrong with a guy proposing that quick to a gal, since they knew each other while they were kids...

but on her side, let her take her time to study the man first before saying yes to him. 10yrs no be small time o...... people could change within that time frame!

Exactly my point, even someone you knew 3yrs ago could have changed

Bubblefairy:


Exactly my point, even someone you knew 3yrs ago could have changed

Daughter of Zion..........

To obtain a SSCE, as 'worthful' as d certificate is, you spent 14 years (creche/KG - 3 yrs, primary- 5 yrs, secondary- 6 yrs );
To obtain OND, 14+2 = 16 yrs,
For HND, 14+2+1(d one year mandatory industrial attachment)+2= 19yrs!
For Bsc/BA, it's 14+4/5 =18/19yrs.......

But to obtain marriage certificate, all u need be is above 18yrs and u r good to go! No preparation is required. Can we see why divorce/spousal abuse/murder easily creeps in to these 'marriages'?

Daughter of Zion, if u/she can endure (approximately) 20 yrs within d 4 walls of academic institutions just 2 acquire certificates (which is not even a guarantee of getting a job ) let her, and by extension you endure just 3 months on her kneels seeking d guidance from the Omniscient one!!!

Daughter of Zion.........

graphiti:


Daughter of Zion..........

To obtain a SSCE, as 'worthful' as d certificate is, you spent 14 years (creche/KG - 3 yrs, primary- 5 yrs, secondary- 6 yrs );
To obtain OND, 14+2 = 16 yrs,
For HND, 14+2+1(d one year mandatory industrial attachment)+2= 19yrs!
For Bsc/BA, it's 14+4/5 =18/19yrs.......

But to obtain marriage certificate, all u need be is above 18yrs and u r good to go! No preparation is required. Can we see why divorce/spousal abuse/murder easily creeps in to these 'marriages'?

Daughter of Zion, if u/she can endure (approximately) 20 yrs within d 4 walls of academic institutions just 2 acquire certificates (which is not even a guarantee of getting a job ) let her, and by extension you endure just 3 months on her kneels seeking d guidance from the Omniscient one!!!

Daughter of Zion.........

Thanks alot for this. Will proceed effectively. God bless u.

Bubblefairy:


Thanks alot for this. Will proceed effectively. God bless u.

Amen......and u too.

Hehehe...


Women no dey carry ear hear marriage

how did it go bubblefairy?

Babacele:
how did it go bubblefairy?

She returned his ring and they are trying to remain friends but I think she's attracted to him, I can't really say.

.

Bubblefairy:


She returned his ring and they are trying to remain friends but I think she's attracted to him, I can't really say.

it is easy for the world to judge us especially in our private lives when they ain't in our shoes.

Bubblefairy:
VERY LONG. A close friend needs urgent advice.
During my secondary school days, i had a very close friend, we lost contact for like 10yrs and reunited 3years ago at NYSC camp in the East, and became practically inseperable since then.
Through a series of coincidence, she got in contact with a friend of ours during our senior secondary days who happens to be a guy. After communicating on phone, the three of us decided to hook up but i was surprised when he called me out of the blue a day to our hook up, unexpectedly showed up at my place and we went out. After the whole 'its been a long time' greeting, he confessed that he had a serious crush on my friend since senior secondary days. Thing is, when we were in school, everyone and their mother knew that the two of them were seriously crushing on each other and they were the only ones blind to this fact.
We talked but i noticed he was asking for details about my friend and i answered him to the best of my knowledge.
The next day, i just decided not to go for the meet thereby leaving the two of them. She came back ecstatic and really happy to have spent time with him and that was that.
Now, two weeks ago the three of us were supposed to meet again but he called and begged me not to show up, i then made an excuse and didn't show up. Later in the evening, when he drove my friend to my place, i observed that she had a dazed look on her face and she was so out of it, i asked him what he did to my friend and he just laughed told me to ask her and drove off.
When my friend was able to reply, she told me he proposed marriage to her and i was like What The Eff? I actually thought it was a frigging joke until she brought out the ring he gave her, i was just screaming (my mum thought something had gone wrong) like who does that? Who proposes after just two dates I really cannot wrap my head around such happening!
The seriously baffling thing is that she is in a relationship (although long distanced) with another former juniour secondary school classmate who she got in contact with 3yrs ago through me (via fb), the funny thing is that this guy also confessed that he had a crush on her during JSS.
Now, she is parking everything on my head that i should advice her. I have been giving her the follow-your-heart advice but she insists i help her out.
Now these are my questions
1. Is it normal for a guy to propose like this (i'm perplexed as i'v never come across such)
2. What advice should i render cos i don't want wahala for myself in the future.

Did they go on to marry how did this end?

LivingFree

kunleweb:




Did they go on to marry how did this end?

LivingFree

Sorry for the late response.
She is happily married to a great guy.
Got married late last year to someone else
Had to let go of the long-distance relationship but they are still good friends.
Didn't date the other guy at all, just returned his ring.

Thanks for asking.