Hello Romancelanders,

I'm a boy in my early 20s, I actually need mature comments and opinions about my current situation and how to get out of it. The major issue is I've actually gone through a lot while growing up to my present stage. It started with the fact that I was a timid boy while I was very young. I battled low esteem for the better part of my primary school due to the fact that I actually thought I wasn't good looking and all sort. Maybe it was because of the environment I grew up and I left my village to attend secondary school in a city, so I was very intimidated and I saw myself as out of place among peers and this really affected me psychologically and my esteem detoriated drastically.

I actually transfered all my strength to being a nerd and came out with flying colors but I missed out on somethin; Socializing with people. This trend continued till I gained admission into a University.

Though I have actually conquered my low-esteem and in fact I'm now a good public speaker and held several leadership posts during my four years on campus here. The problem I have is I have never really had a successful relationship with girls (dating ), though I have some few female friends but close girls have come to see me as a "very responsible young man" (Don't know if that's an automatic turn off). I have been able to ask girls out easily online but I'm not cool with that, will like to meet with someone in the real world here and fall in love conventionally. Most of the relationships I have have never being perfect, it is either I don't like the girls or they don't like me....it just doesn't add up. I have not being choosy (permit me to use that ) though I have a thing for intelligent girls.

So mature peeps on here should come to my aid, I really need opinions on how to get around this.

NB: THE major reason why I'm worried is because I'm almost through with my degree programme and I have a paying Part time job, I believe it will best if I can meet my other half while I'm here because when I'm all made it might be difficult to find someone who's going to be true to me, plus all my friends are in serious relationships and it is always embarrassing anytime we go out with only me coming alone.

Thanks in advance.

She will come at the right time, besides, check yourself, your environment, there will be a girl that is attracted to you but you don't know, don't force it, the girl will come at the proposed time.
NB: Most girls love bad boys, just a tip. You know what to do with the information

In your early 20s. Still a student. From your post I think you are talking of serious relationship. My friend your future must be your priority now. I'm not trying to sound like your parents or over sabi but since u do meet girls just that its either u don't love them deeply or they don't love u either, its ok. Channel other energy to building a formidable future for urself. Why I'm saying this is because, even if u fall in love now, there is a high tendency that you are going to end up with a broken heart cos the girl may not be able to wait until you are ready to settle down.

Hehehe. Over seriousness is d matter. I've been in ur shoes before. Nysc go open new chapter for ya diicck no worry. Just free yourself and don't form seriousness when meeting a girl for the first time. Forget English or bookworm. Speak pidgin, crack jokes around sex call dem funny names....like my yoriyori. Bla Bla. When you fall in love finish you go change completely. Pusssy get power to change the hardest mind.

lemme come back from Church

Girls find responsible guys BOOOOOORING..Like if you agree..share if u dont.

Shossie:
She will come at the right time, besides, check yourself, your environment, there will be a girl that is attracted to you but you don't know, don't force it, the girl will come at the proposed time.
NB: Most girls love bad boys, just a tip. You know what to do with the information

Thanks dear, I'm not actually forcing but I just feel since I'm almost through with school and I have a budding career already, a good relationship is just what I need right now. Thanks.

gprincead:
In your early 20s. Still a student. From your post I think you are talking of serious relationship. My friend your future must be your priority now. I'm not trying to sound like your parents or over sabi but since u do meet girls just that its either u don't love them deeply or they don't love u either, its ok. Channel other energy to building a formidable future for urself. Why I'm saying this is because, even if u fall in love now, there is a high tendency that you are going to end up with a broken heart cos the girl may not be able to wait until you are ready to settle down.

I get the point you're driving at bro, but the thing is I'm building a good career for myself already. I just feel the relationship is what's next, you will agree with me that I just have to start from somewhere.

TosinDru:
lemme come back from Church

Will be waiting.

I understand your position as i've been there before (or should i say still there ) and you have the right to worry but then some things fall in place with time.
But i wanted to understand something here ooh,
"Is it that you're feeling timid to meet a girl you like" or "you haven't find the one you like?"

LuvSwollenPussy:
Hehehe. Over seriousness is d matter. I've been in ur shoes before. Nysc go open new chapter for ya diicck no worry. Just free yourself and don't form seriousness when meeting a girl for the first time. Forget English or bookworm. Speak pidgin, crack jokes around sex call dem funny names....like my yoriyori. Bla Bla. When you fall in love finish you go change completely. Pusssy get power to change the hardest mind.

Lol... Actually I'm not that naive, like the experience is there but the major issue is a serious relationship.

Op I want you to understand that we are all destined to achieve some things at different times. You are right to feel concern about your situations but never compare your life with another. We can not all move at the same pace, who knows your partner may be in your work place and not school. You just have to keep your hope alive and await the best. If we run the race of another , we will fall in doom of another.

Tuham:
I understand your position as i've been there before (or should i say still there ) and you have the right to worry but then some things fall in place with time.
But i wanted to understand something here ooh,
"Is it that you're feeling timid to meet a girl you like" or "you haven't find the one you like?"

Lemme claim somewhere in between, I'm not that timid but the few girls I have dated on campus,it is either they just gave me outright green light or I get their numbers from friends then I kick off. The only problem i have in that aspect is meeting and approaching a girl I don't av anything to do with out rightly. And about the second one, it is more about serious relationship.

Sometimes, when you try too hard to find something you will never find it. When you focus on other things and let it go, your blessing will surprise you.

Alesandese:
Op I want you to understand that we are all destined to achieve some things at different times. You are right to feel concern about your situations but never compare your life with another. We can not all move at the same pace, who knows your partner may be in your work place and not school. You just have to keep your hope alive and await the best. If we run the race of another , we will fall in doom of another.

Thanks hun.

Safiaa:
Sometimes, when you try too hard to find something you will never find it. When you focus on other things and let it go, your blessing will surprise you.

Really?? Okay thanks

LegitBoy:
Thanks hun.

Glad I helped.

LegitBoy:
Lemme claim somewhere in between, I'm not that timid but the few girls I have dated on campus,it is either they just gave me outright green light or I get their numbers from friends then I kick off. The only problem i have in that aspect is meeting and approaching a girl I don't av anything to do with out rightly. And about the second one, it is more about serious relationship.

Maybe the time is not yet. All i could say is; Bare your heart open but do not be too eager.
And when you finally find that one, try to be confident enough to approach her even if its just starting on a normal friendship level.

Tuham:


Maybe the time is not yet. All i could say is; Bare your heart open but do not be too eager.
And when you finally find that one, try to be confident enough to approach her even if its just starting on a normal friendship level.

Thanks