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The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men - Jobs/Vacancies (7) - Nairaland

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Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Lunagirl(f): 2:46pm On Mar 28, 2017
speezyWears:


Marry Me.

Ring please grin grin

1 Like

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by TonyeBarcanista(m): 2:49pm On Mar 28, 2017
Lunagirl:

Please go ahead. By all means, it's my pleasure!

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by ADAMUdaCOWBOY: 2:50pm On Mar 28, 2017
Lunagirl:
True.

To all the men out there struggling to create an identity, know that we, the women in your life appreciate you.

We see you, we know the pressure on you. Most importantly, we have your back all the way.

Especially to my father, brothers and my future husband, I see you and I will be true all the way there.

#hustlersmindset
Many babes dumped me in that state, hmm! Many male friends useless me, laugh me join, my hommies o! I come back from UK after MSc. dey hustle from hand to mouth like pesin wey never ever hustle. But I always give thanks to God that my wife married me in that state and never disrespected me on grounds of lack. Today things are so much better. I beg God to help me be a great man for her. She is human and wrongs me sometimes and I get angry, I always try to control my anger for her sacrifice and even when I say or do something wrong to her, in no long time, I rush back and beg her. Thank you for the nice post, just like other Nairaland guys, I love it Lunagirl.

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by unilagfreshest(m): 2:51pm On Mar 28, 2017
I saw myself in that post.... Op on point, New day, new challenge.... Am 26 going on 27.

2 Likes

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Lunagirl(f): 3:04pm On Mar 28, 2017
ADAMUdaCOWBOY:

Many babes dumped me in that state, hmm! Many male friends useless me, laugh me join, my hommies o! I come back from UK after MSc. dey hustle from hand to mouth like pesin wey never ever hustle. But I always give thanks to God that my wife married me in that state and never disrespected me on grounds of lack. Today things are so much better. I beg God to help me be a great man for her. She is human and wrongs me sometimes and I get angry, I always try to control my anger for her sacrifice and even when I say or do something wrong to her, in no long time, I rush back and beg her. Thank you for the nice post, just like other Nairaland guys, I love it Lunagirl.

I am happy that you have the decency to acknowledge someone that has hustled with you. A lot of guys don't. The minute they see break light, they begin to find another girl that will suit their "status"

2 Likes

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by speezyWears: 3:05pm On Mar 28, 2017
Lunagirl:


Ring please grin grin

How do I give it to you?

I can start with your email.. grin
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Jclement(m): 3:06pm On Mar 28, 2017
Lunagirl:
True.

To all the men out there struggling to create an identity, know that we, the women in your life appreciate you.

We see you, we know the pressure on you. Most importantly, we have your back all the way.

Especially to my father, brothers and my future husband, I see you and I will be true all the way there.

#hustlersmindset
Thank you
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Lunagirl(f): 3:06pm On Mar 28, 2017
Jclement:
Thank you

You are welcome kiss
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by EmmyDJourno: 3:07pm On Mar 28, 2017
God bless the writer of such a piece. I was soaked in depression in that stage, and didn't believe when I got out.
I couldn't buy soap or even barb my hair.
Girlfriend? embarassed if I hear, friends thought I was wierd cause I dropped off from their company so as not to feel envious of their jobs, fun and flirtatious escapades
I won't deny the help MaryJane grin was to me in those trying times, she was my escape from reality
But like the Israelites left Babylon so did I. Hold on to your God(not easy but do), your liberation would come
Through it all I learnt faith in God and how to appreciate every single alert I've been getting ever since, plus now my Family and Friends who saw me in my lows now respect me cause I'm now balling hard

Again: YOUR TIME TOO WOULD COME wink

6 Likes

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Teawhy2011: 3:10pm On Mar 28, 2017
Hummm! I'm 29 nw,still living wt parents after nysc,depending on them b4 I cn gt a two-squaare meal daily. Sober mood....!
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by oyetpel(m): 3:18pm On Mar 28, 2017
Teawhy2011:
Hummm! I'm 29 nw,still living wt parents after nysc,depending on them b4 I cn gt a two-squaare meal daily. Sober mood....!
my God.... you made me weep
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Juchii(m): 3:25pm On Mar 28, 2017
Kaeyzo:
I'm 24 but I thank God for the blessing. I own a lots of things which average of Nigerians dont own. I pray God to Give you too
Good day sir, i thank God on your life, pls abeg help a brother? Or can u teach me how to fish instead. 09074565287 my number. Judech4life@yahoo.com

1 Like 1 Share

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Nobody: 4:06pm On Mar 28, 2017
alaricsaltzman:
Found this interesting piece on facebook and i decided to share...enjoy

The most difficult age for any man born in Nigeria should be between 24 and 29 years, the pressure to be something, to be someone is so immense. When you look around you everyone seems to be doing something for themselves, people seem to be living a life you only dream of. You have applied for jobs and the results have been more disappointing than Yakubu Aiyegbeni goal miss at the world cup.

Sadly this is the age when most guys lose it, the age when if not careful one is consumed by alcohol or drugs, because the disappointments become too much and you find alternative ways to face reality. Worse is when a few people you studied with have been lucky enough to land
jobs, soon your circle of friends gets thinner – mostly they don’t even cut you out but you will be real with yourself and cut yourself off. I mean what will you do when you are in a WhatsApp group of friends and they are discussing about last week’s trip in Dubai and planning another trip to South Africa while you are not sure of what your next meal would be?

Most times you follow the conversation silently, all alone like a cross on the grave. Soon you realize this is no longer your kind of crowd because the more you keep around the more the pressure to be something, takes a toll on you. You know when stories about house parties
come up and you act deaf because you don’t know where an extra 5 guys would fit in your house. Have you ever sat in a group of people discussing the new iPhone on the market or how British Airways offers poo services and you can feel your heart whisper to you "boss this is chest pain hour, can we just go and find a group that talks about GMAT, SHL, Dragnet, jobberman or job vacancies sites".

But you sit there as these people are lost in their lifestyle conversations, you are like a secretary taking minutes in meeting. You are totally forgotten like one of a woman’s breasts during pre-intimacy. Once in a while one of the friends will turn and ask if you need another drink and you wonder if you should just say No and head home, but head home to do what? So you grudgingly drop in the comment “I will have just one last one“...Lie!!!

But after a few years of job hunting, you are now ready to take anything even if is to smell a rich man’s farts as long as it pays, so you end up as an office messenger in one blue chip company in town. To imagine that 4-5 years of studying and getting a degree is now reduced to picking and dropping off letters and if you are not doing that, you are being sent for cheap lunch by the employees when they are broke and they can’t order with fast food. This is when conversations about where people schooled start, you go silent for it’s no longer of any use to say you also reached University, it doesn’t matter – you have resorted to surviving.

Once in while you will bump into your now well to do classmates, they would offer you lunch, but not even eating the meals at Eko Hotel or Sheraton will make you feel better about yourself, because in your mind you wish instead they would give you the 30k and you sort your meals for the next 5 weeks. As it is the norm you will have photos taken, and uploaded on Facebook, but always it’s your face that would look the odd one out – not even the best filters can hide a face which has suffered the city's dust and sun but survives on boiled beans.

The worst mistake you can do during this period is to try and date – there is nothing that a person going through such times can offer in terms of love. How are you going to do evening romantic walks when you are tired from walking delivering letters in offices around town? What are you going to tell your lady when she says she wants to go for relaxation at the bar, pool or love garden sites that are in town? That your financial religion doesn’t allow it or what? This is the age when you sit back and watch as the ladies you would want to date are dating or getting married to guys 10 years older than you. And you can’t blame them – it’s only that your life seems to be progressing slower than their goals in life. Most of the ladies you meet during this period, if you are lucky will be patient with you till you hit 28, and if by then your life is still in disarray like Leicester city's performance in the EPL then my friend be prepared for a walk out.

But then this is the age when you learn a lot of about life, if you can hack through this stage of life the only hard moment in your life would be when you lose your parents - that’s if you are still lucky enough to have them. This stage teaches you a lot about perseverance, about appreciating the small wins you have each day, it teaches you something about friendship, love, career growth and personal responsibility. This is always your rise or fall moment depending on the choices you make.

How you live your life in the 30’s is determined by how you handled your life in this phase. Do not Give up. Do not Be Depressed. remain focused and create a Strategy. Be consistent, you must Surely Win. Peace cool cool


https://m.facebook.com/WbsTvUganda/posts/967701073268464
You should have said 24 and above till you finally succeed. It doesn't doesn't stop at 29 cos many guys still struggle into their 40s.

2 Likes

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Nobody: 4:16pm On Mar 28, 2017
Lunagirl:
True.

To all the men out there struggling to create an identity, know that we, the women in your life appreciate you.

We see you, we know the pressure on you. Most importantly, we have your back all the way.

Especially to my father, brothers and my future husband, I see you and I will be true all the way there.

#hustlersmindset

I can marry you because of this comment.

2 Likes

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Nobody: 4:22pm On Mar 28, 2017
This is just it. I'm in this stage right now though I've got a job (luckyme). One thing I've learnt is walking away from relationships. Killing it before it even starts. This is not the stage of love, it's a stage where you either become a man you love or a man you love to hate. Make or break it

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Reuben2012(m): 4:35pm On Mar 28, 2017
Am also in this phase of life. My heart always long for success. Doing it in my own way but been held down by 7:30am to 8:00pm job. even though i fail, i still keep my head high and keep on dreaming. God bless my huzzle and God bless my lady for loving me for who i am.

4 Likes

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Timblaze(m): 4:37pm On Mar 28, 2017
hmmm. am currently in this stage/phase of life. OP u hv said it all... is well
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Olubee22(f): 4:42pm On Mar 28, 2017
Teawhy2011:
Hummm! I'm 29 nw,still living wt parents after nysc,depending on them b4 I cn gt a two-squaare meal daily. Sober mood....!
so far you don't give up, keep trying and that is going to be history soon . Sha don't complain and just keep hustling .O ma make sense very soon

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Nobody: 4:42pm On Mar 28, 2017
Beamborla:


Love love love... Until you love yourself, don't look for love.
I don't think you can practice what you just preached. Easier said indeed. Seeking the companion of the opposite gender is one those natural urges. It's frustrating living a life against nature. I don't blame you for saying the above cos you are a lady. Like the guy earlier said: ladies enjoy relationships even when they are broke.

1 Like

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by IBreakRules: 4:59pm On Mar 28, 2017
kayo80:


I feel you. I went through the stage from around 29-35. I am just getting out of it now. IT WAS HELL ON EARTH. Much worse than what OP wrote about. Have you gone 4 days without food before? I will write a book about it soon. 7 Yeas in the Wilderness.
haaa bros... looks like your own case was very thick o. Thank God for life anyways
.

2 Likes

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by bamurum87(m): 5:22pm On Mar 28, 2017
grin see as I just dey luk myself,chai op ur on point
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by ebby9z(m): 5:24pm On Mar 28, 2017
Lunagirl:
True.

To all the men out there struggling to create an identity, know that we, the women in your life appreciate you.

We see you, we know the pressure on you. Most importantly, we have your back all the way.

Especially to my father, brothers and my future husband, I see you and I will be true all the way there.

#hustlersmindset
God bless you. Few girls understand this
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by ebby9z(m): 5:31pm On Mar 28, 2017
I'm within this age bracket and i totally agree with op. The irony is that the society that never gave you anything to establish yourself will start demanding a lot from you at this age. Your family members, siblings, cousins, friends-especially the female folks. If you cant give at that time, people assume you are stingy or just an unfortunate human being. In fact they wont respect you, small boys will just talk to you anyhow. Then if you are someone like me that loves his independence, setting out on your own can be very herculean espeically in this Lagos where a decent accommodation is costly. May God just pull us through in this repressive economy

2 Likes

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by cooldood(m): 5:45pm On Mar 28, 2017
For me, I think basically that phase (24-29) is the period of self-discovery; where you should try to attempt different tasks, activities, adventures, businesses and what have you. You practically have little to nothing to lose at that period and should pick a lot of learning from what eventually pan out for you as a growing man. By age 30, you should have understood what love means to every female folk out there (whether from rich or humble background), you should understand rudiments of business in 9ja (being streetwise), you should understand who your true friends are and the ones that are just 'using you' to advance in life.

By age 22, I was privileged to have finished uni at one of the great unis in 9ja, served my beloved country and by 23, was working in a big and well structured commercial bank in V.I, Lagos. At 24, I got my first ride, got involved with different babes and by 25, I started crafting out all sorts of business ideas flying in my brains. Guess what, it wasn't easy at all, 'cos I moved out of family house at age 24 and was practically becoming a man of my own.

Meanwhile, before starting out my first business (a mid-size restaurant with capacity for 50) through my hard-earned savings of two years and a friend's support, I had left the commercial bank to join a top Management Consulting Firm in V.I and started developing business acumen.

Outcome of my relationship: Discovered love from ALL BABES is simply based on a man's present value (PV); whether it is discounted future value or your actual present value, the common language there is value. Pray you meet a lady that can see through her lense of wisdom, to be able to see your future value and therefore willing to wait (this is really scarce nowadays though) till your flowers begin to blossom (I don't blame the female folks though, that is how they are wired, they just have different tolerance levels).

Outcome of my first business: I discovered theories, book models, analysis, and all those Porter's 5 forces, BCG matrix, McKinsey's MECE methodology, etc will bow down when they get to the streets of 9ja. Business in 9ja is like war. If you want to start, be prepared! I wont' say more than that on my business adventures. My first business failed after barely 2 years.

But fast forward today, I have now crossed that phase, moved on to bigger things, live in Lekki Phase 1, planning to get my third car (Audi A8 2014 model) and working within the investment banking space. Life is beautiful! And at 31, am planning to buy my first home in Phase 1 within 2017, after life looked doom n gloom few years ago. Like the op said, never give up on your dreams, never stop believing and never be afraid to try out new things.

17 Likes 4 Shares

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Nobody: 6:19pm On Mar 28, 2017
Im 20 but Im starting to feel it. Op thanks for highlighting our struggle.
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by SmartyPants(m): 6:56pm On Mar 28, 2017
Lunagirl:


Hey you too. tongue

How you dae...
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by tk4rd: 7:31pm On Mar 28, 2017
Lunagirl:
True.

To all the men out there struggling to create an identity, know that we, the women in your life appreciate you.

We see you, we know the pressure on you. Most importantly, we have your back all the way.

Especially to my father, brothers and my future husband, I see you and I will be true all the way there.

#hustlersmindset
Thanks.
That's some words of hope and encouragement
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by hazard1759(m): 8:02pm On Mar 28, 2017
I'll be 26 Come April 24th and I'm going through this Difficult phase. Coupled with the fact that I'm the only child, Ive been under pressure to get married but who will do that when u've not found your footing in life? Lost a relationship I've nurtured that dates back to my university days in February but i consoled myself with the fact that its her loss not mine. Its been a bumpy ride but I thank God for everything. I believe at the end of the day, We go dey alright!

1 Like

Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by Withambition(m): 9:14pm On Mar 28, 2017
Lunagirl:
True.

To all the men out there struggling to create an identity, know that we, the women in your life appreciate you.

We see you, we know the pressure on you. Most importantly, we have your back all the way.

Especially to my father, brothers and my future husband, I see you and I will be true all the way there.

#hustlersmindset
Like seriously? OMG! Lunagirl just made my night...this is also sweet. I love you kiss But ermmm...I just hope this is coming from your heart?
Re: The Most Difficult Age For Most Nigerian Men by haykes(m): 9:22pm On Mar 28, 2017
I Swear this is most sensible thread i ever read on nairaland i called this straight bullet op u make sense die OP OF THE MONTH lol

1 Like 1 Share

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