Please kindly calm down and read so that you can advice me on what to do.help a soul before i loose my mind.



I have been dating this guy for a long while now, he says he loves me so very much and at a time i believed everything he says prolly because of the way he helps me out financially when am in need. Now to the matter on ground, my boyfriend hardly calls or chat me up, i do all the calling which he always declines with iam busy at work during the day or at night the network around my house is very poor. Even when i chat him up on whatsapp or facebook, his replies are always kk, aiit, love u so much and it ends there. Whenever he chats me up in the morning its a usual sermon baby how are u, after that it is take care love you. I have complained a thousand times and got tired of complaining. If u are around me and u notice all his actions u may conclude iam the one been foolish in love. Sometimes in other for him to cut my complains short he wud quickly apologise and tell me how much he loves me, the next day we are back to square one. Whenever i visit him he prefers hanging out wit his male frnds and ignores me all day at home, dis continues untill the day iam to leave. But after some weeks he wud still plead and plead that i visit him which wud foot all the tp expenses and more... But the p is anytime i decide to leave the relationship afta no sign of improvement even if i ignore him for a month he is ready to spend that entire month every second bugging my line with calls, text and chats telling me how much he loves me and how much he cant stay witout me. Sometimes he even goes ahead to accuse my family of been the ones advicing me to leave him. My problem is am i the one not bn understanding or is it that i need to leave the relationship. The way he calls, text and chats even if it is every second why cant he do even a quarter of it normally to prevent the quarrels between us, why must he wait until there is a problem or quarrel to show his love. Sometimes i see myself as a material that he just spends money on but dont love me. I have complained and am tired seriously, sometimes he results to laying curse on me if he notices iam really trying to stay away frm him, he calls me a heartbreaker and all, he is driving me insane. I buy him gifts on special dates but this guy has not even given me a wrapped or unwrapped toothpick aside money and money. Yes iam grateful for his financial assistance but sometimes i need to feel the love. Sometimes weneva we are together and i just bring up a conversation its either he wants to sleep or his friends are calling him out for a drink. No one on one communication between us, i barely know him. He might act all busy whenever iam in his house and neglects me but let me just dress up and step out either to the mall or somewhere else he wud suddenly become less busy calling me at almost every interval asking wat iam doing or where iam until i get back to his place. Walahi iam tired, i need advice from good thinking nairalanders i want to know if iam the one been inconsiderate or iam just in a fruitless relationship. How would i end up getting married to someone that wud make me turn to a loner whose companion is only on the TV or her job.

naso dem no know how to love, later they will come and blame women for spending their money and leaving them.


anyway I'm sure you already know that kind of relationship wouldn't be healthy for you in the long-run you know what to do.

note: from your write-ups it is obvious that that is who he is, if you can't stand him leave him, there is a girl that is looking for a guy like that or one that can at least tolerate him.

Life is too short to be unhappy.

Pls ignore that crappy First advice. I told my girl if I don't call you as much as I should it doesn't mean I don't love you, its just the kind of person I am and thank God she understanss. O.p you need to cut your guy some slack, he may not be much about the calls and displays it doesn't matter trust me the fact that he tries so hard when about to lose you should tell you he loves you. Abeg free the nigga none of u is mad just understanding is needed dasaall!!

why don't you break up with him and no matter how much he begs, tell him you want to just be friends. he apparently is the type who doesn't relaize how much something means to him till it appears he will soon. lose it. therefore play with his emotions, call off the relationship. make him suffer for weeks. but keep picking his call but maintain your stance that you want the relationship over but are perfectly OK with friendship. that all this while you have realised you peeps ain't friends and it's best you return back to that. maybe in future if you ever learn how to be good friends then you could date if you haven't moved on. simple

this man fully well knows that your words are worthless, so he has no reasons to value them.... one minute you say you are leaving and next you are staying, so he now knows the game, and is playing it better than Messi plays football. your words will forever be taken for granted.

here is what you should do (if you actually mean to leave this loveless union):
sit him down and tell him exactly how his action are disrespectful, humiliating and seriously affecting the wellbeing of your r/ship. tell him EXACTLY what you desire in this union, and then warn him that the next time he will fail on any of his promises, that would be the last time he ever lays eyes on you. if he ever fails again (and take you for granted), walk away and NEVER return. et voila!

beak up with him...he doesn't love you enough ,,when a guy can stay close to 3days without calling his girlfriend or to chat her up just know that he has already lost interest...just forge ahead with your life,,,he will tie you down..run for your life asap

no advice sis, but i will say follow your heart...




You have the right answer to this question in your heart...

Kai so many messed up advice, op for God's sake people are wired differently some guys are not good at displaying love it doesn't mean he doesn't love you..see someone calling it a loveless union already and you yurself said he takes gud care of you, its about personality its not as if he has another girl that he's disturbing with calls its clearly who he is.

Are you sure he is not gay

temmytopsy1:
Are you sure he is not gay

i have asked him couple of times and the way he replies doesnt give the indication of him bn gay because sincerely i hav tot of it before

KiidaACE:
U gats leave that ode,,he clearly doesn't appreciate u....even the sauciest of guys get thier girls the nicest of gifts,even if thats the only thing they know how to do.goes a long way in showing love/care in every relationship.this alone is enough reason to show u he sucks big time..dunno why ur even asking 4 advice gan.

i have tried a thousand of time to break up but if he calls and calls and i dont pick or i pick and dont act like i normally do the next thing is to start laying curses on me and saying i'm bn deceived by my frnds and family.

I really want to know why guys have a phobia for calling and chatting? a guy will be online all day but will never say hi. he will get calls but he never calls back?


Op I think you should just relax and watch as things go, don't rush into a decision. try your best to call and do other stuffs, try to also make yourself unavailable.

The problem with women is they love attention above any other thing and the problem with Men is that they get too busy and think not calling and texting shouldnt be an issue

SauceXJuice:
i have asked him couple of times and the way he replies doesnt give the indication of him bn gay because sincerely i hav tot of it before

How would you even ask him if he's gay
Isn't he tapping ur poooçi

Hello bae! It seems u are good with d bedmatics perhaps he doesn't want to lose u because he enjoys u in bed believe me for him to be showin care wen u step out of his house shows he doesn't wnt another man to enjoy what he is enjoying he wants u all to himself he is attracted to u sexually rather than emotionally. He is not in love wit u but if u feel u ar enjoyin the way he spends on u u can continue to stay wit him if not u know wat to do. that's is my piece of advice.

IsiahRashad:


How would you even ask him if he's gay
Isn't he tapping ur poooçi

so u havnt heard of gay men that still get married and bare children to keep their identity in disguise. But i know he isnt one, tho at a time i was having the impression

SauceXJuice:
i have tried a thousand of time to break up but if he calls and calls and i dont pick or i pick and dont act like i normally do the next thing is to start laying curses on me and saying i'm bn deceived by my frnds and family.

is that all??u know what i think?i think you're scared of him or u love him 2 a fault...which ever of em it is,,its not cool @ all..u gotta drop em and drop him or youll cry ur eyes out someday but by then,it'll be late....learn.

SauceXJuice:
i have asked him couple of times and the way he replies doesnt give the indication of him bn gay because sincerely i hav tot of it before

u are not attractive to him. U are ugly thats why

Lolzzzzzz ur boo get better boo