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My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years - Family (10) - Nairaland

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Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by Omogbhollahorn(m): 12:43pm On Sep 02, 2017
khiaa:



Hmmmm! I didn't know that grown Nigerian men needed permission to marry the woman that he loves. This is a bad look for you guys it makes you look immature, a grown man is supposed to know what he wants and go after her without permission from mommy and daddy. I couldn't marry such a man.

I tire ooo. When no be say na she wan help me marry am.

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by Omogbhollahorn(m): 12:50pm On Sep 02, 2017
katoto:
If my mum says no to my marrying any lady,then it is no.It doesn't matter the number of years we dated.
Wow you self na man too smh

2 Likes

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by khiaa(f): 12:57pm On Sep 02, 2017
Omogbhollahorn:


I tire ooo. When no be say na she wan help me marry am.

What
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by blueafrik: 12:57pm On Sep 02, 2017
Stevengerd:
E get as e be ooo.. am sure u mom saw something. just tok to her bro!

Forget......u have been with a girl for 9year and u did not see error...... ur mom see girl for 1 day and she don already see thousand thinz........guy abeg wife her joor

3 Likes

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by khiaa(f): 1:06pm On Sep 02, 2017
gratefulheart:
She know what you don't know.
Try and discuss with your dad for way out.


Stop being ridiculous, he's known her for nine years and mommy just laid her eyes on her. Mommy knows nothing about this woman and mommy should be happy that a woman cares so much about her son that she was willing to stick with him through thick and thin for nine years without being his wife

2 Likes

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by DOnlooker(m): 1:08pm On Sep 02, 2017
Even though I find it cruel of you to date a girl for 9 whole years without taking her home for once or even letting your family know there's a lady in your life but a spirit that can not sense that there's someone "purportedly" bad sticking with you through thick and thin for 9 years, is that one a spirit ?
Your mum must have her reasons, maybe she has some other girl in mind for you and has been putting things in the works for that assuming you were single. She will tell you some day what actually is wrong.
The decision is yours but if I had a girl that stuck with me for that long, I'm hers.

2 Likes

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by Nobody: 1:09pm On Sep 02, 2017
How can a lady date a man for 9 years without marriage? Smh, I rebuke this nonsense in Jesus name

2 Likes

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by TheGreatIYANU: 1:16pm On Sep 02, 2017
Passy089:
I've dated my fiancee from my year 1 in the university that's 9years now, she stood with me through thick and thin, never left me for ready made guys, she trusted and supported me and I promised myself no woman will make me happier than her so I proposed to marry her....

So I took her to see my parents for the first time, but I got the shock of my life when my mum rejected her at 1st sight for no particular reason her word was "my spirit just don't accept her" my dad was cool about my choice as long as I'm happy, I've been begging my mother to reconsider but she has made it clear she won't have anything to do with her or me if I go ahead and marry her.

I'm just confused,the last person I'll leave is my fiancee but my mum too is very special to me.
what should I do??


MOD please help forward this to FP

Brother call me... 08095775197

I need to talk to you
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by adeg(m): 1:19pm On Sep 02, 2017
Get a marriage counselor to speak and reason with your Mum
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by OldBeer: 1:23pm On Sep 02, 2017
katoto:
If my mum says no to my marrying any lady,then it is no.It doesn't matter the number of years we dated.
LOL!
This one too will beat his chest that he is a man.
Go inside and suck mama breast, let men talk about this issue.

2 Likes

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by OldBeer: 1:23pm On Sep 02, 2017
bayulll011:


matured woman,I like ur view not all these ladies that can't watch their panties on Nairaland giving advice on relationships
Mumu, omo mummy!
It is wash.

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by hAlexandro(m): 1:28pm On Sep 02, 2017
Have you prayed about it if God says yes then you should go ahead with it just make your momma see reasons why it has to be her cos listening to the voice of God is better off to the opinion of men
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by ferhyntorlah(f): 1:31pm On Sep 02, 2017
khiaa:



Hmmmm! I didn't know that grown Nigerian men needed permission to marry the woman that he loves. This is a bad look for you guys it makes you look immature, a grown man is supposed to know what he wants and go after her without permission from mommy and daddy. I couldn't marry such a man.

Different strikes for different folks.
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by SirMazi: 1:33pm On Sep 02, 2017
mofeoluwadassah:
you dated her for nine years and you have not for one day taken her to your house? then it means you dont love her
Why you dey think like this na,he no love her but he want to marry her.Does it correlate

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by helpee(m): 1:41pm On Sep 02, 2017
khiaa:


Stop being ridiculous, he's known her for nine years and mommy just laid her eyes on her. Mommy knows nothing about this woman and mommy should be happy that a woman cares so much about her son that she was willing to stick with him through thick and thin for nine years without being his wife
And when the marriage is about to break, people like you will gladly advise the woman to quickly pack her loads because marriage is not a do or die affair. By that time it will only remain his mother who will always be there for him. I can never because of this new generation women fight my mum or disrespect her. It has nothing to do with being a man. A man is somebody that can set his priorities right. Until you are married your mother is your first priority. Talk her into accepting your choice....never ever for once disrespect her cos of all these so callled FIN SISTERS

2 Likes

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by mamachizzy(f): 1:50pm On Sep 02, 2017
supersystemsng:


I hope he listens...In marriage God by-passes parents to give the blessings they withhold out of jealousy, i hope he bypasses that his selfish mother and will listen...
As long as there is no concrete reason why a parent is saying no to ur spouse, I think u should go ahead and marry. what does the mom mean by her spirit just doesn't accept her? dumb reason. some parents think that because they gave birth to u, they have to make all ur decisions for u. its crazy

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by afroxyz: 1:51pm On Sep 02, 2017
If deep down in your heart you are sure that you would be happy with her, then Mr man, grow some balls and marry your wife. How can you make a decision and not stand to defend it? Weane yourself off your mum's breasts

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by khiaa(f): 1:52pm On Sep 02, 2017
helpee:
And when the marriage is about to break, people like you will gladly advise the woman to quickly pack her loads because marriage is not a do or die affair. By that time it will only remain his mother who will always be there for him. I can never because of this new generation women fight my mum or disrespect her. It has nothing to do with being a man. A man is somebody that can set his priorities right. Until you are married your mother is your first priority. Talk her into accepting your choice....never ever for once disrespect her cos of all these so callled FIN SISTERS


I couldn't continue to read this because the op clearly stated that his mom said that she would have nothing to do with him if he married the woman that he loved so how could you conclude that this woman/mother would be there for him when she was the problem from the beginning?

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by id4sho(m): 2:05pm On Sep 02, 2017
Passy089:
I've dated my fiancee from my year 1 in the university that's 9years now, she stood with me through thick and thin, never left me for ready made guys, she trusted and supported me and I promised myself no woman will make me happier than her so I proposed to marry her....

So I took her to see my parents for the first time, but I got the shock of my life when my mum rejected her at 1st sight for no particular reason her word was "my spirit just don't accept her" my dad was cool about my choice as long as I'm happy, I've been begging my mother to reconsider but she has made it clear she won't have anything to do with her or me if I go ahead and marry her.

I'm just confused,the last person I'll leave is my fiancee but my mum too is very special to me.
what should I do??


MOD please help forward this to FP
Boss I feel your plight, how is your mothers attitude towards siblings,cousins,relatives getting married. Is she always hostile or cool with them, most especially the male folks like you. Try to remember their own scenario right from childhood or talk with them privately concerning the issue, how was your fiancée reaction when your mother rejected her. Does your mother have issues with tribe,village,state.You know your mother better or observe her closely.
Being with this lady for nine years is a sign that you are responsible wether you take her home or not. Pls reply accordingly for further ??

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by Nobody: 2:07pm On Sep 02, 2017
IamEmem:
OP u mean u dated a girl for 9 years and never took her home to meet ur family!! You are the architect of ur troubles now, I only pity the poor lady who stood by you and u must marry her cos her world is built around you. Just find a way to persuade ur mum cos u need her now than never before.
Goodluck.

Exactly bro. Exactly. In fact what kinda woman would date a guy for 9 years without meeting his mum.

Even if witches in the village are doing her. It can't be up to 9 years. Habba! They would have left her in the 5th year lol.

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by SLOVFO(m): 2:10pm On Sep 02, 2017
You know your mom better than any of us online.
Possibly, your mom knew the girl's background. Or maybe there is a secret between them. Otherwise, she should spill the beans or remain quiet forever.
I love my mom, but if she chooses to be unreasonable, she is on her own. In the final analysis, it's your life.

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by Nobody: 2:12pm On Sep 02, 2017
khiaa:



I couldn't continue to read this because the op clearly stated that his mom said that she would have nothing to do with him if he married the woman that he loved so how could you conclude that this woman/mother would be there for him when she was the problem from the beginning?

I think the story is false. I mean, in this day and age. A girl would date you for 9 years without asking to see your parents.

Habba! 9 years na beans? If na play make dem stop am abeg !
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by ovovskid(m): 2:15pm On Sep 02, 2017
Ur mom n ur fiancee fit kn for coven.u can't tell.
Let me b going
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by giles14(m): 2:18pm On Sep 02, 2017
supersystemsng:


If a girl can have a guy's back for nine years, is there any other characteristic that should be too big to discredit her from being a good wife?
non really.
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by nopretense: 2:23pm On Sep 02, 2017
mofeoluwadassah:
you dated her for nine years and you have not for one day taken her to your house? then it means you dont love her
Lool, wc kind philosophy b dis one now?
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by OLUJOSHINS(m): 2:25pm On Sep 02, 2017
Passy089:

I'm just confused,the last person I'll leave is my fiancee but my mum too is very special to me.
what should I do??



This is a childish statement.


The fact that you are contemplating whether to stand with her or not magnifies the fact that you are a deadly betrayer.

PLEASE PROVE ME WRONG.

Tell mummy to say whatever she has against your union or forever remain.....
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by nopretense: 2:30pm On Sep 02, 2017
OkunrinMeta:
Which kind of woman is your mum. Is she intuitive or is she the type that likes drama. You may have known your babe for 9 years buts you've known your mum for thrice as long.

So this is not a decision about your fiance persey. Its about whether you trust your mum's instincts or judgement. For example, if i want to marry someone and my mum says no, i will just find a way to manage the drama and still go ahead. However, if my dad says no, i will have reevaluate and reconsider to be sure i am accurate in my assessment. At the end, it is YOUR decision


Just think deep, you know the answer you are looking for.
Woow
This is a genius and informed comment, coming frm an experienced and enlightened mind...
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by katoto: 2:31pm On Sep 02, 2017
OldBeer:
LOL!
This one too will beat his chest that he is a man.
Go inside and suck mama breast, let men talk about this issue.
I know I will get alot of mentions.I know my mum.My mum will always want the best for me.She has never intruded or bludgeoned into any of my private/intimate matters.She encourages my relationships.For her to object against any lady means something ominous which I know she will definitely inform me about her misgivings.This issue is more than being a man.It is forestalling future regrets.

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by HARDDON: 2:48pm On Sep 02, 2017
greatmarshall:
my brother you know what is good for you and what you want... Your mum can not choose a wife for you... Wife her man...she's been with you for nine good years through thick and thin...

Women have six sence men don't.

As much as i wud advise you be ur own man n stew ur own soup, Neva take ur momma's foresight for granted!

This is no war times gee. This is wisdom time because d worst time to make a decision is war times.

Momma don't hate u, she wants d best for u. Yea, given, they reacts most times wen they come to d crude realization that some gurl is gono be hvin d bulk of your luv now that does not mean she wud be this blunt!


Op, take it from a gee that hates momma's awkward inputs into his life, but u can't take this for granted!
The woman is seeing things you n ur dad aint.

Apply wisdom, sweet up to her wen she least expect n try to pick her brains why she isnt down wit your choice.

YOU MUST DO THIS BEFORE U TAKE UR NXT STEP

1 Like

Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by Duru009(m): 2:49pm On Sep 02, 2017
supersystemsng:


Stop spreading panic...God is higher than all mothers even mine

The truth is always bitter.....
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by Essienovic(m): 2:59pm On Sep 02, 2017
But Chairman how could you hold a girl spell bound for 9 years without showing her to your parents? Being fully aware that your parents can influence your choice of a mate should have made you present her to your family much earlier. That's already bygone, I think you shouldnt cancel your plans with the girl just based on some flimsy reasons from your mum, ensure that she states solid reasons for her objection. 9 years is no joke especially for a lady!
Re: My Mother Rejected My Fiancee After Dating For 9 Years by chukzgerine33(f): 3:07pm On Sep 02, 2017
chukagates:
am not surprised i knew a lady will say what u jst said ...no be una again?? pple wy dey find man wey im mama don die..
Hahahahaha ...somebody should tell me to stop laughing .....hahaha lwkm

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