pcguru1:


Make i hear say i wash am, I don't know why i just can't and if i have to it must be that my wife is pregnant and is weak then that's no problem because it's the only logical reason to wash it, if not i ain't washing mehn

OK brother, even when am sure u wash some places with your tongue.. I didn't say anything o

needful:
Nigerian Men have lost it. I pity the next generation because the way things are going now, it maybe a woman's world in the next generation in nigeria. What I do not understand is the big deal in a man washing clothings, cooking, infact house chores. Love or no love, let's digest it. We both left house around 5am to work and came back by 6pm. Common sense as a man should told you that as you are tired, so is with the other party. What I see in Nigerian marriage is selfishness, Ego, blames, materiality, pretence to mention but few. May God help us.

God bless ur generation..

mctowel01:

Most intelligent response. A lot has changed in the modern world. Now you just tuck your clothes into the machine, and its saving you time. A lot of manual tasks in naija are now automated. What does the woman do then?

how many men can afford doz, even some who can still wants their women to go d old way in d name of good wife material

enkayhope:
OK brother, even when am sure u wash some places with your tongue.. I didn't say anything o

I can neither confirm nor deny that statement.

Lawlahdey:
Sure, it's a man's world.
This post is meant to be sarcastic. Honestly, if a woman starts taking care of the finances of a family,She 'd naturally want to assume the role of the head since she's playing it already.
Any man who says a woman must bring to the table too is just a lazy fool. I will only bring to the table if I feel my husband needs my help.

and if he loose his job when you still have your will turn him to toilet brush

Lawlahdey:
In every home, Godly and African, the man is considered to be the head of the family and the crown of his woman. It is his responsibility as the head of the home to provide the family's financial and material needs. It is his responsibility to protect the family in all ways.
Likewise, it is the responsibility of the wife to take care of the home and the family's spiritual and social needs. A good woman makes a good wife and mother. A good woman is the mother of the home and the family.

Nowadays though, it has become the mantra of the 21st century man that he cannot marry a woman who isn't ready to bring anything to the table. Honestly, I have no problem with a woman working to bring something to the table to support her man. It's no biggie.

But you have to know that once I start sharing your responsibilities with you, we will share mine too. If I have to work hard to bring something to the table, you have to know that we will share your crown as the heads of the family. I have become your head and you have become my head. We are both heads.

If I do the dishes all through a month, you will do the dishes all through the next month.
-If I do the laundry this week, you will do the laundry the following week.
-If I cook the meal for breakfast, Dear husband, you'll make dinner.
-You have to go the market on days when I can't.
-You will leave your work to take care of the kids on days when I can't.
-I'll be submissive to you only if you're submissive to me.

Dear husband, you will wash my bra and also my panties. You will clean the house. While I'm washing and cleaning the kitchen, you will wash and clean the toilet.
And trust me, we won't be needing a maid or a houseboy/girl because it's both of our responsibilities and we have to share it.
Not to worry, I'll be taking care of my share of the financial responsibilities too.

Afterall, it is about sharing responsibilities!


Cc: Lalasticlala, Dominique, Mynd44.

you said to support,.atomatically the love is gone,.God will not send me that kind of woman,..even if na house wife bad woman will still be bad

Forget money,.if your wife cnt support then she should be ready to cut down flat to accomodate financially on what you make

before marriage you use to visit,then who does my:

laundry
cooking
cleaning

Then:

take you out for treat
buy you stuffs,.me

so you see,coming into my life is to aid my life,not to be additional problem and if God bless you with a work and you suddenly realized its your personal thing or u will put my head in the toilet before you aid then he will do something about it.

marriage does not mean that my sweet me you used to know will fade out cos it wasnt faked,..i will still make my family a special dish anytime am chanced,take time over the weekend to rearrange my house and know how the kidos are doing with school and stuff,read them bed time stories after i give them bath and feed them if i come back early enough to meet them awake or soak the dirty laundry in the washing machine over night spin it early morning preparing to work and spread.supporting or not this are things i will do for my self even when am alone so its no work..........but never for her to start beign commanding what i must do bc she is supporting,.simply means she is tired.

sex part,.me i wont even entertain anyone disturbing my night sleep after work cos she won chukuchuku,early morning is ok.........if she thinks that one is a job too then she is calling sata to come

all the same Date your spouse and know what will work out for you two not some layed down shit by others..maka ndu gi

enkayhope:
just like d woman will support financially at her own convenient time. I will say it again, na doz men wey no get anything at all dey do Oga pass, real men do things at home with love cos they know it's their home

you made the best point ma'am

pcguru1:


I can neither confirm nor deny that statement.

Yes ofcos, after all we r saying samething

Lawlahdey:
Sure, it's a man's world.
This post is meant to be sarcastic. Honestly, if a woman starts taking care of the finances of a family,She 'd naturally want to assume the role of the head since she's playing it already.
Any man who says a woman must bring to the table too is just a lazy fool. I will only bring to the table if I feel my husband needs my help.

You were making sense until you made this comment..

In this 21st century if you don't have anything to bring to the table you surely won't get married because even the so called traditional men or alpha males don't want liabilities as wives.

With this your ridiculous and primitive mentality I wonder who'll marry you.

And who told you men don't do chores these days?

ImaIma1:
If the woman is also working and having kids, i see no reason why the man cannot help with chores. It is not a matter of rules or not. A man that loves you and cares about your wellbeing will not see you working like a slave and not help.
Some men are ok with sitting down and dishing out orders instead of helping and getting involved. They would rather complain about the food not being ready or the child crying. It's just selfishness and pride.
And if the man is too lazy too help her,he should get a help that can. People wonder why some wives age faster and look older than their husbands. This is part of it.
Don't pray to marry such men that still see chores as solely a woman's job.

Your all emphasis was just on the chores.

Refuse the man from paying bride price and all these noise about cooking and house chores will stop. Majority of married men in Nigeria believe that their wives are their properties because they paid bride price.. Cooking and cleaning isn't their responsibilities.

And as for your post.. I think any woman who doesn't share bills with her husband doesn't deserve to be helped in house chores by the husband even if she's nursing kids.

walexsho:

[s]Home chores shouldn't be shared nor be seen as must for a man. The man can just do it on his own volition and it is not ok when the wife now sees it as a norm. Imagine the wife now says "when you are less busy please help wash my cloth" or the kitchen is not in order and the wife ask him why he did not clean it. It's absurd, westernization shouldn't take over our pride and Heritage[/s]

Such a primitive and uncivilized individual.

Seems like you forgot this is the 21st century.

It should be common sense that a wife and husband share responsibilities in marriage. But because many people are indoctrinated by patriarchial beliefs about gender roles, many men enter marriages thinking that being the "head" of their wives means being the "man-in-charge" while doing less work than their wives. There is some research out there which shows that after marriage, a husband's load tends to be lighter (because he has a woman in his life to shift his burdens onto) while a wife's load tends to be heavier (because she is carrying most of the weight of household chores, child-rearing, and the emotional labor of maintaining the marriage). Study after study indicates that men (on average) benefit more from marriage than women do. After a woman marries, her workload increases dramatically, while the husband's workload decreases. Married men live longer on average, while married women live shorter lifespans than single women who live by themselves. I am by no means saying that people should not get married. But rather, I hope to draw attention to the fact that responsibilities are often imbalanced in many marriages, and both spouses are often not sharing responsibilities equally. Research also shows that even in marriages where both spouses work outside of the home and split the bills 50/50, the woman still ends up carrying most of the weight in the marriage. So the idea of a man calling himself "the head" or the "leader" of the home, and also claiming that he "loves his wife as Christ loves the Church" while doing less work than his wife, is entirely ridiculous. You aren't the head or the leader of anything if your wife is carrying more weight than you, and you definitely aren't treating her as "the weaker vessel" or "loving her as Christ loves the Church" by loading her down with heavy burdens like a mule or a workhorse. Last time I checked, Jesus doesn't do less work than the Church and weigh the Church down with heavy burdens while calling Himself the "Head" and expecting submission from the Church. Yet a lot of these religious men do the exact opposite of Jesus' example by putting forth as little effort as possible in marriage and expecting their wives to do more work than they do AND PAY HALF THE BILLS, and then call this one-sided relationship a "Biblical marriage." No sir. I don't think so. Responsibilities should be shared in a healthy, loving marriage. But sadly, this is often not the case because of patriarchal nonsense.